Holly Lane (11 page)

Undeniable desire moved within her. Warring. And then . . . winning.

And when she next spoke, her voice came out breathy. “Adam, I . . . ”

“What?”

Oh God, she couldn’t quite catch her breath.

But then she finally managed to blow outward, starting to get hold of herself. Desire had won for a very brief moment, but now she managed to say, “I should go.”

“I don’t want you to,” he said quickly.

She grew aware of her own heartbeat yet again. “You don’t?”

“Nope.” Plain and simple.

So just as plain, and just as simply, she asked him, “What
do
you want?”

“To be buried back deep inside you.”

Holy crap. She heard herself gasp once more as his words ran all through her—this time mostly between her legs.

Get out of the truck.
You have to.
You can’t afford to risk your heart again this soon—you just can’t.
Sure, you can tell yourself it’s just sex, but there’s really no such thing as that.
Sex comes with emotions—deep ones you can’t push away.

But then another voice spoke up—and she feared if she glanced down she’d see an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other, and this new voice was definitely the devil.

It’s not like he’s asking you to wear his class ring and letterman jacket, for God’s sake.
This is sex.
Good sex.
Pure and simple.
Why shouldn’t you let yourself have that?

“I want that,” she heard herself murmur. Then she covered her mouth with her hand. “Oh God, did I say that out loud?”

“Yep,” he answered, eyes warm yet steely on her, wholly determined.

“Can I take it back?”

“No way in hell, sugar plum,” he said. And when his hand closed around her arm this time, it was to pull her to him across the space that separated them.

And she went, willingly, because she couldn’t not anymore. She’d tried to resist. She’d spent all day trying not to feel what she felt. And when he curled his other hand seductively around her neck and drew her in for a kiss—oh God . . . oh yes.

She closed her eyes and absorbed every nuance of every pleasure assaulting her. She felt like a woman who’d been thirsty for a week and now she was finally getting to drink—of him.

And then, just like last week in the cabin, thinking gave way to only feeling, and then . . . to complete surrender.

Eight

No falling snow was more intent upon its purpose.

Charles Dickens,
A Christmas Carol

I
n a way, Adam felt like a jerk. Because he knew she wasn’t ready for this, was fighting it hard, and yet he was kissing her anyway. And because she didn’t yet know about his conversation with Jeff. He’d been about to tell her a little while ago—that’s why he’d brought Jeff up on the drive home. But then she’d changed the subject and they’d reached her house, and before he knew it, he’d ended up here—pressing his tongue into her mouth, letting himself get consumed by the sensation, and digging his fingertips slightly into her ass as he pulled her closer, settling her onto his lap until she straddled him.

Yeah, he might usually be a good guy, but this went beyond that. The chemistry between them was so strong he simply couldn’t push it down. Maybe he’d forgotten that, the chemistry—the way it had slowly taken them both by storm in the cabin. And now that they’d shared that, the connection had grown all the more powerful and intense. He couldn’t remember a time in his life when he’d felt more physically drawn to someone, when his body was operating almost independently of his brain, when he was following instincts and urges, simply giving in, giving up, following where his lust led him.

And damn, he liked kissing her. He could still taste the remnants of hot chocolate on her lips from earlier as her arms settled warm around his neck, and as—aw God, yeah—the crux of her thighs pressed against his hard-on. Before long he could hear them both emitting rough, jagged breaths between kisses.

“I have to have you,” he murmured unplanned as he reached for the button on her blue jeans.

She said nothing, but didn’t protest when he lifted her off of him, over into the other seat, and proceeded to tug down her jeans, the panties with them. In fact, she shrugged free of her parka at the same time, leaving her clad in only a loose sweater. He paused just long enough to crank the heat higher so she wouldn’t be cold, and then he let his gaze roam her, naked from the waist down—she’d kicked off her shoes, too.

“My God, you’re beautiful,” he whispered deeply, and it struck him that maybe she was even more beautiful to him for the same reasons he’d originally agreed with her that this was a bad idea. Because she was Sue Ann. Because he’d known her forever. To be this way with someone he’d known so long ratcheted up the intimacy level, big time. And somehow pushed him to bend over her, lowering a kiss near her hip.

She sucked in her breath—a light, pretty, sexy sound—but he didn’t look up at her; he just let that little noise wrap around him, fuel him, as he parted her legs and delivered another soft kiss, this one to her inner thigh. It made her moan. And turned his cock still harder. A small growl echoed from his throat as he sank his mouth to where she was wet and hot for him. And then he dragged his tongue through her moist folds, listening to her heated sighs, coming thready and passionate from above.

He got lost in kissing her and licking her that way—and though part of him felt just as impatient as he had a few minutes ago, a
better
part of him wanted nothing more than to pleasure her, to show her how good he could make her feel.

He was pretty sure he achieved that when her moans grew deeper, more insistent, when she lifted herself against his mouth—when finally she cried out her orgasm in a symphony of “Oh God! Oh God!” and the small heated sobs that followed.

When she went quiet a few seconds later, her body going still, he rose up to face her. She sat biting her lip, one hand clutching tight to the back of the seat, the other curled around the handle of the glove compartment as if holding on for dear life. At some point, Harry Connick, Jr. and Lee Ann Womack had started singing a very sexy version of “Baby, It’s Cold Outside,” on the radio. Sue Ann’s eyes looked wild.

Meeting her gaze darkly, Adam wasted no time hauling her back into his lap—then reaching to ease the seat back into the extended cab behind them. She was already working to open his jeans when he whispered in her ear, “Ride me, Sue Ann.”

Sue Ann could barely breathe. She hardly knew what had come over her. But wait—yes she did. Adam had come over her. Stark need had come over her. She’d thought she had this situation at least somewhat under control, but clearly control had fled the scene—right about the time he kissed her hand.

And so now she was reaching into his underwear, wrapping her hand around his firm erection, and relishing his sexy command.

And Lord, she wanted to feel him, flesh to hot flesh—but apparently she still possessed at least a little of her brain, since she asked, “Do you have . . . ”

“Shit, almost forgot,” he said, then lifted slightly to maneuver the same well-worn wallet from his back pocket that she herself had retrieved a condom from last week. This time he did the retrieving, tossing the wallet between the seats as he ripped into the foil square, but she did the rolling on, the very act of which heightened her anticipation almost immeasurably. God, she needed him. Now. Inside her.

The sound of their labored breathing filled the truck by the time she lowered herself onto him, her body taking him inch by tantalizing inch—and they both let out low groans at her slow descent. And when he was within her completely, their eyes met in the shadowy darkness, and Sue Ann knew a brand new closeness with him, an intimacy that somehow even surpassed last week. His hands curved warm and solid over her bare hips as she kissed him and then began to move, her desire guiding her instinctively.

Oh God, he felt good inside her, and just like the previous times they’d joined together like this, she let go of all the uncertainties involved and basked in the pleasure he pumped up into her. It echoed through her veins, out to her very fingers and toes—she felt each thrust everywhere.

And she knew she wouldn’t climax again, because she just had—but she didn’t care because this was about a different sort of pleasure, about something raw and hard and animalistic that made her feel . . . free. In this moment, there were no worries, no troubles—there was only Adam and passion and the warmth of this truck all enveloping her, making it so that nothing else in the world mattered.

She met his thrusts, ground her body against his, and delighted in his strong hands rising to her breasts to caress and massage. And she lost herself in the sensations, in the motions, in his intoxicating kisses—to her mouth, then her throat . . . until—oh God, she was wrong. She
was
going to come again. “Ohhh . . . ” she moaned at the realization. And it was going to be intense.

Then her body hit that peak, that perfect point of no return where the pleasure came raining down over her, rushing all through her, hot and jagged and overwhelming, making her cry out over and over—until finally the rough pulsations faded, leaving her weak and spent as she collapsed against him, arms looped tight around his neck.

His arms closed around her waist and he continued kissing her shoulder, and then the delicate flesh just below her ear, whispering again that she was beautiful, a sentiment that kind of turned her inside out, making her flash back to that day in the department store when he’d helped her feel attractive for the first time in a long while.

But—oh God—that’s when he resumed driving up into her again, hard and deep, stealing her thoughts, making her moan.

She pulled back, met his hot gaze, liked being in his strong arms.

And even when he murmured, “I want to be on top of you,” she liked that, too, for reasons she couldn’t understand but didn’t stop to examine.

The next thing she knew, Adam was lifting, rolling them both, him still snugly inside her, until she lay back in the newly reclined passenger seat, his body hovering above hers. And then he was thrusting again—even harder now,
hard, hard, hard
—and leaving her flushed from head to toe from the power behind every stroke, the way her body absorbed it, the pulsating sensations assaulting her again and again.

She didn’t know how long they moved together that way, only that she felt profoundly well-pleasured by the time he said, “God—God, now,” plunging into her with still more force as he reached that hot pinnacle himself, releasing a low groan as it overcame him.

T
en minutes later, Sue Ann was dressed, Adam’s pants were zipped, and she sat on his lap, one arm around his neck, thinking: What now?

Then he kissed her.

Okay, kissing was now. And as usual, his kiss moved all through her like some warm, slow-flowing liquid, saturating her from head to toe. But once the kiss was over she had to get serious here, had to come back to herself. She had to tell him the truth that still permeated her, no matter how close she felt to him or how good the sex had been.

“Adam,” she said, “what we just did . . . it can’t happen again.”

She waited for him to agree, as he had last week—so even despite what he’d said earlier about being unable to stop thinking about her, it took her aback when he hesitated, meeting her gaze with his, still all warm and blue in the glow of the dashboard lights. “Why not?”

Hmm. This was unexpected. “Because we agreed.”

“But . . . why did we agree?” he asked. “I mean, I thought it made sense at the time, but now I’m not so sure.”

Sue Ann took a deep breath and decided this would be easier if she were sitting by herself in the passenger seat instead of on top of him in the driver’s seat. But even as warm and sturdy as he felt, she had to stick to her guns. It was the only thing that made sense to her. “It’s . . . really soon after my divorce.”

“I know,” he said as if that were no reason at all.

“And I have to think of Sophie, too. I can’t be bringing a new man into her life when it may not last.”

“I’m not a new man in her life. I’m her godfather. I’ll always be there.”

But she ignored that, going on. “And . . . I have to protect myself, protect my heart. I’m . . . emotionally vulnerable right now, you know?”

He simply gave his head a pointed tilt. “I would never hurt you, Sue Ann.”

She bit her lip, wanting to believe him. Yet it was impossible not to be wary. He’d probably thought he would never hurt Sheila, either. And yet, the sad truth was, as she’d learned the hard way recently, even the best of men could change, could make mistakes, could do things you’d never imagine.

“How can you know?” she ventured. “Never is a long time. And . . . it’s awfully soon for a relationship. For me. And besides, I have so much to deal with right now. I was busy enough before, but Jeff’s alimony petition has opened up more than one big can of worms for me, you know?”

She was surprised, though, when that actually quieted Adam—and maybe, despite all her good reasons, there was a part of her that wanted him to keep arguing, wanted him to somehow begin convincing her that . . . well, maybe she should rethink this. Maybe she shouldn’t let her worries stand in the way. Yeah, she had trust issues now, so it seemed smart to stay on guard. But what if Jenny was right about this? And what if she was wrong? What if that niggling feeling inside her, that hint of disappointment that he wasn’t continuing to try to talk her into this was God or fate telling her she was supposed to stop fighting her desires and give him a chance? What if . . . what if she was somehow passing up the best thing that could possibly happen to her?

She bit her lip, peering into Adam’s eyes, thinking through all this, and beginning to let it sway her, just a little. What had seemed clear and absolute just a minute ago now suddenly started turning more cloudy and uncertain.

Maybe I shouldn’t tell him no.
Maybe I should tell him maybe.

Or hell, maybe I should just follow what my heart really wants right in this moment and tell him yes, that I want something with him, that I want more of this.

And that’s when Adam finally said, “Um, speaking of Jeff . . . Sue Ann, I couldn’t tell you this earlier when Sophie was with us, but there’s something you should know.”

She blinked. Hmm. She hadn’t seen that coming. “Oh? What should I know?”

“That Jeff asked me to testify at the alimony hearing.”