Hold Me (2 page)

“Your ex sounds like an asshole.” Caleb casually leans on the wall, his arms crossed in front of his bare chest, his fingers flexing. He looks as if he were posing for a photograph.

“I know. That’s why I want to forget him and finally be free of him.” It’s ridiculous that one part of me seems to think Mark could be right, but I can’t help myself. The fear is too real. It grips my insides and squeezes even harder when I try to ignore it. No matter how much I try to convince myself everything is fine, my body doesn’t listen.

“Did you try longer foreplay or use some lube?”

“Yeah, at one point.” I cringe at the memory of the annoyed look on Mark’s face. “But my ex kind of lost his patience after a while.” A frown creases my brow. “I don’t remember how long we tried or how much lube he used, but when he tried to enter me, it hurt like hell.”

“What about the second guy?”

I hesitate. “He’s a friend. Sort of. We met at the bar.”

“Did he do anything to make you uncomfortable?” Caleb carefully observes my face.

“Um, I don’t know. We were slightly drunk and... I don’t know.”

“There’s nothing wrong with you,” he says with all the certainty in the world.

“You can’t know that. Look what happened...”

“I can prove it.” His voice is low and seductive. “You were never with someone who paid attention to your body instead of seeking their own pleasure.”

I raise an eyebrow at him. “And what if it doesn’t work out? What if I really can’t...?”

He shrugs. “Nothing. At least I can give you a couple of orgasms before you leave.”

I gape at him and he smirks.

Pushing himself off the wall, he comes to stand in front of me. “You’re overthinking it. Enjoy the sensations and don’t worry about anything.”

I lick my dry lips. Am I so afraid of failure that my worst nightmares come true because I can’t stop thinking about ruining everything? Probably. But I don’t know how to stop myself. I know that the more I think about it, the worse it gets, and I wish I could force myself to think about something else, but I don’t know how.

“What were you thinking about when you pushed me away?”

I meet his dark brown eyes. “My ex getting angry... and a little rough.”

“I’m not your ex,” he says softly. “I won’t hurt you.”

“I know. You don’t even look like him. It’s just...”

“Touch me.” A playful smile curves his lips. “See for yourself that you don’t have to be afraid of me. I won’t bite unless you tell me to.”

I’m not exactly sure what he wants me to do, so I don’t move.

Sighing, Caleb takes hold of my hands and places them on the hard muscles of his chest. He lets go of me and I lightly trace my fingers up and down his smooth, warm skin. His pants rest low on his hips and there is a black edge of a tattoo peeking out above the belt.

“Pull my pants down,” he says, his hands at his sides. “I know you want to.”

I give him a surprised look through my eyelashes, but deep inside I know that he’s right. I do want to take his pants off. Even my body reacts to the idea, sending waves of heat through me. Maybe being busy would stop my mind from wandering. I fiddle with the button and carefully pull down the zipper. Caleb’s chest raises and falls a bit faster, and I can feel his erection pushing against the fabric under my fingers.

I tug down his pants and realize he isn’t wearing any underwear. As the pants fall to the floor, his cock springs into view, fully erect. A smug smile appears on Caleb’s face. He’s even bigger than Mark. This is so not going to work... and yet, a tremor of excitement runs through me.

The tattoo is now completely exposed. I stare at the symbol that reminds me of a rose, but I can’t tell what it is. Before I can ask, Caleb steps out of his pants and grabs a condom from the nightstand.

“Why don’t you help me with this?” He offers me the wrapper and takes my free hand, placing it on his thick length. I glance up as I gently slide the condom over him, a smile spreading across my face.

Caleb’s body tenses and his eyes widen as I bend my head to take him into my mouth. I keep eye contact while I roll my tongue around the tip of him. He opens his mouth as if to say something, but I only hear a quick intake of breath. I’d love to take all of him into my mouth, but he’s too big.

“You don’t have to...” his voice breaks and cracks as he is struggling to stay on his feet.

“I want to,” I say, surprising myself, and close my lips around him once again. I never enjoyed doing this with Mark, but Caleb doesn’t grab my hair like he’s going to rip it out and doesn’t try to push himself down my throat. Caleb’s eyes flutter closed as I increase my pace and lick faster, closing my hand around him a tiny bit tighter.

“Please, stop,” he breathes out. I let go of him and pull back. Surprise flashes across his features but is quickly masked with a broad smile. “Thank you, but now let me do my job.”

I lie down on the bed, smiling to myself as I hear Caleb’s labored breathing. He climbs on the bed and gets on top of me. As he lowers his lips toward mine, I expect him to kiss me and I arch my back toward him. With a wicked smile, he reaches under me and unclasps my bra. I help him take it off and run my hand through his hair, pulling him in for a kiss.

His lips barely touch mine and he focuses his attention on my breasts. I bite down on my lip, amused at the way he looks at me, as if I were a delicious ice cream. A shiver rocks my body as his tongue caresses my nipple. He traces slow, torturous circles around my swollen bud until his mouth closes over it, his teeth grazing against my tender skin. My lips part and I curl my fingers into Caleb’s hair, gently stroking the soft dark brown strands.

He glances up at me. “Do you like this?”

I nod, unable to say anything remotely coherent.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” His tongue finds my other nipple and I throw my head back, craving more of his touch. I want him inside of me, and that thought both scares me and thrills me. My hand slips from his hair and finds its way to his back. He moves down my body, leaving a scorching path of kisses down my stomach.

His eyes briefly meet mine before he pulls my panties down my legs. I bend my knees and he spreads my legs with a nudge. My first instinct is to close my legs together, to stop the cold air from hitting my heated flesh, but Caleb doesn’t let me, his grip firm but gentle.

“It’s okay,” he says. “I just want to return your favor.”

I tense as I feel his touch on my most intimate place, but all of my thoughts scatter the moment his tongue parts my folds. My hands ball into fists and clutch at the sheets as he continues to flick his tongue up and down. The pressure builds as he takes his time, teasing and probing. I arch my back, rocking my hips slightly.

“Faster,” I say, breathless.

One twirl of his tongue in just the right place spills me over, and a ripple of ecstasy sweeps through every inch of my body. A contented sigh flies past my lips and turns into soft laughter. Caleb was right. I don’t even need to have sex to feel satisfied.

The sheets rustle, and I feel more than see Caleb shift on the bed, and then I hear a drawer opening and closing. Before I have a chance to recover and get in control of my breathing, he gets on top of me.

“Everything okay?” Something in the brown depths of his eyes sparks with knowledge and maturity.

Maybe that’s the reason I decide to trust him, so I give him a brief nod. His lips graze mine and I stiffen as his cock touches my inner thigh. My stomach flutters with anxiety and I squirm under Caleb’s strong body, not hard enough to push him off me, but hard enough to make him frown.

“It’s okay,” he says, placing his hand on my cheek. “Look at me.”

I do what he asks and take a deep breath. He’s not Mark. He’s not going to hurt me. I know it. I’m sure of it. Then why the hell do I feel like I could jump out of my skin? I must be the worst client Caleb’s ever had.

He sits back on his heels, positioning himself between my legs. I’m too afraid to look down my body to see what he’s doing. My mouth forms a little O as he rubs the tip of him against my opening. I expect him to try to push himself in, but he doesn’t. Instead, he slowly slides himself up and down, barely entering me.

His teasing movements set my blood on fire, stirring a need so intense that I lift my hips off the bed.

“Please,” I whisper. Smirking at me, he pushes himself a bit inside me, but pulls back almost immediately. I let out a frustrated groan, flailing my hands. The back of my right hand collides with something soft that flies off the nightstand before I can see what it is. I don’t care. I just want Caleb inside of me. I want him to stop torturing me like this.

“What was that, princess? Do you want me to stop?” Caleb’s voice is thick with desire.

I vigorously shake my head. Talking seems like such a waste of time and air.

“Good to know,” he says.

I hold my breath, bracing myself for the pain, but he only rubs himself against my clit, hard enough that the throbbing between my legs threatens to throw me over the edge.

Caleb intently watches me, and I focus on his eyes, the tension seeping out of my body. Then he slides himself inside. A twinge of pain comes and fades in an instant, chased away by all-consuming pleasure. The sensation of having him inside me is strange and unfamiliar, but it sends tingles of delight all over me.

I would’ve whooped in delight, but Caleb starts to move, slowly and carefully, and I cry out. Arching my back, I reach for his shoulder and pull him toward me.

“Faster,” I say as he leans over me.

“Yes, princess.” His breath catches in his throat, but he does exactly what I asked him to. I meet him thrust for thrust, the sweet pressure building and building. He buries his head into my hair and nips on my earlobe. I can’t take it anymore. Digging my fingers into the soft skin of his back, I feel my body spasm and I clench my muscles around Caleb’s thick length.

His body tenses above mine and we both cry out. I cling to him until we’re both spent and sated. Caleb rolls off me and sprawls on his back, his chest heaving. I stare at the ceiling and a choked laugh escapes my lips. Mark was wrong. There’s nothing wrong with me. I can’t believe a part of me was stupid enough to trust anything that came out of his mouth.

I feel Caleb’s eyes on me, so I turn my head to face him. He immediately averts his gaze, but I catch a glimpse of longing and sadness on his face.

“Caleb,” I say as he sits up.

“Yes, princess?” He looks at me, the corners of his lips quirking up.

“Thank you.”

He gives me a brief nod, his lips still spread into a smile, but his shoulders are tense. “Anytime. Is there anything else I can do for you?” He gets to his feet.

“I guess not.” I sit up, drawing my legs to my chest. Now what? My clothes are all over the floor and I’m not as comfortable as Caleb to walk around naked. Granted, he’s seen every inch of me already, but somehow this is different. Now that the last bits of pleasure have seeped out of me, I feel sore. I’m not sure if I can even walk.

Caleb picks up my panties, twisting them around his finger. How did they end up all the way across the room? Instead of handing them over, he looks at me. “How about you go shower and I’ll take care of this mess?”

“Right. Shower.” Clutching a sheet around myself, I stretch my legs and swing them off the bed. The room tilts around me and black spots fill my vision. Yeah, getting up so fast wasn’t one of my best decisions.

As I make my way to the bathroom, I glance above my shoulder at Caleb. He’s picking up my clothes and putting them on the bed, not even taking a peek at me. I’m disappointed and I don’t even know why. Maybe because I’m ogling him so hard that I nearly run into the door. Shit. Okay, it’s better that he didn’t see me doing that.

Before I close the door behind me, I take another look. Caleb’s back is turned to me and I bite my lip to stop myself from making a sound. He’s so damn perfect. I wonder if he has a girlfriend, but I’m not sure any girl would be willing to share him with anyone else. At least I wouldn’t.

“What took you so long?” My best and only real friend scoffs at me as I finally arrive to our usual meeting place; a small cafe bar at the outskirts of town, far away from prying eyes and noise.