Hitman's Secret Baby: A Bad Boy Romance (2 page)

“I don’t know, but I have to get out of here.”

“You drop that bombshell and now you’re just gonna leave?” Anna asked, outrage in the way she held her arms wide.

I was. I had to. I turned, feeling my hair fall from the elaborate up-do the stylist put in just a few hours before, and I walked away, with the sound of Anna’s tears heavy behind me.

Chapter Two
Mason

The cheap hotel room drywall broke under my fist, cracks webbing out from the point of impact.

How could I have been so stupid? Rolling up to my sister’s wedding a decade after “dying,” expecting Taryn to accept what I’d done?

She’d been a vision after all these years, the pictures online hardly preparing me for the reality of her dark eyes and expressive face. I hadn’t realized just how badly I’d missed her.

And a child—a daughter. Taryn was right, that little girl deserved better than to know what her father was. A killer, a mercenary for hire, a thug. Someone who existed solely in the shadows, known only to the shadiest of people. Clients passed my employers a name and I killed for the profit—more than that, I killed for the rush of ridding the world of another scumbag. When I looked into Mr. Foster’s eyes before I lit the match, his prone form laid out on the hay-strewn floor of his own ranch, I felt nothing but satisfaction.

Who needed a father like that? Someone who was, ultimately, no better than the man who made me—William Foster himself.

I couldn’t stay locked up in my self-pity, though. I had to investigate Ethan Foster before I left town again, making absolutely sure he was nothing like his father. I had to do it for Anna’s sake.

Then I could leave in peace, try to put this place to rest once and for all.

My phone buzzed and I picked it up impatiently, hand still aching from the wall. “Yeah?”

“You’re not in New York,” came a voice down the line.

My old colleague Jay, I realized with a frown; the scrawny sixteen-year-old from across town who was recruited not too long after I was. He’d chosen to stick around this place, and I hadn’t seen him in years. Not since the last time we bumped into each other on the same job in Colorado.

“No. You stalking me?”

“Swung by that fancy Foster wedding today, you know how it is,” Jay drawled, meaning he had business there—a strike against Ethan’s character, as far as I was concerned. “And who do I see but my old buddy, Mason. It’s your lucky day—I got a job that’s perfect for you. Meet me at the usual place, nine PM?”

I gritted my teeth. “Now’s not a good time.”

“I don’t really give a fuck, dude.”

I scoffed. “Your manners haven’t improved much.”

“Just meet me. You might like what’s on the table.”

There was a hint of amusement in his voice, and I hadn’t seen the idiot in long time. I figured
what the hell
and told him, “Fine, but you’re buying.”

I hung up, tossing my phone on the bed. I needed to change out of this uncomfortable suit. I needed to sort my damn head out. I wished I could banish the image of Taryn, the life I could have had, but she was fixed in my mind like an impossible daydream, lulling me into this awful sense of longing.

My concentration kept slipping.

I rarely refused jobs, having hard-earned my reputation as one of the most loyal and sought-after guys on my boss’s books. I couldn’t start now just because of a pretty face from my past.

No, she was more than that, but I had to wrestle that particular monster back into its box.

Taryn deserved better. That little girl—
my little girl,
a tiny voice in my head said—deserved better.

I showered and changed into something more appropriate, slipping on a leather jacket over a dark-colored hoodie. Outside, I pulled up the hood, stuffed my hands into my pockets, and walked the few blocks to The Royal bar, a place that was anything
but
.

Quickly, I descended the concrete steps to the basement entrance and let myself in.

Nothing had changed about this place. I remembered coming here for the first time, just a kid eager to impress his
cool
new friends. This place had been the shit back then, but the thrill had worn off and now it was just plain shit.

I didn’t recognize the barman, but I spotted Jay at a corner table, eyeing me up with a smirk.

“Get me a whisky, would you?” he called over, turning the sparse few heads in this joint—barely lucid alcoholics and guys with bad news written all over them, who looked like they might quite literally kill for a whisky too. That was just Jay’s shtick: cause a bunch of trouble and leave me to fight my way out of it.

“I thought you were buying,” I quipped back, getting us two drinks anyway.

The barman looked the usual kind for this place: mean-faced and silent. I spotted a baseball bat hanging up on the wall, no doubt for troublemakers, its wood soaked with brown stains that could only be old blood. I knew those stains intimately.

I put the glasses full of liquor on Jay’s table, pulling up a wobbly stool.

“I should warn you that I’m not in the mood for this, Jay,” I said darkly, tipping half the liquid back—cheap as all hell and burned just as viciously.

“Look.” Jay held up his hands in placation. “This is a job you’re gonna want, okay?” He was still a twitchy fella, hadn’t managed to pack on many pounds since I last saw him. “You
specifically
.”

I frowned. “Get the hell on with it, then. This ain’t The Voice.”

Jay leaned down, rummaging in a bag at his feet. I watched him, tapping my fingers against the sticky table-top and rapidly losing patience. My head was filled with Taryn, with Anna, with my daughter. I wanted to drink whisky until those images were scoured out, banished to nothing but white noise. Until I could sleep without the smell of smoke choking me awake.

I should never have come back here, I knew that now.

I knew it until Jay placed a file on the table, one with a name emblazoned across the top that made me freeze.

“He’s the target?” I asked, wanting to be
very
sure.

“Yup.”

“Fuck,” I muttered.

“Thought you’d like it.”

Jay knew my history—all the boys around here did. They’d helped me disguise my very first kill; they got me a job working my way up the ranks of my boss’s organization. Jay knew exactly what this name meant to me.

I looked down at the file with my gut churning. I should’ve felt vindicated, righteously pleased, but all I felt was hollow.

Ethan Foster,
it said, mocking me.

The universe had a warped sense of humor, that was for sure.

“You’re taking it, right?” Jay asked, like it was obvious.

“It’s been a shitty day,” I said roughly, trying to disguise this—
implacable
emotion with a growl. “Can you give me a goddamn minute? The bastard is marrying my sister right now, for God’s sake.”

“All the more reason for you to want him dead.”

It was a fair point. I did need a minute, though. I’d killed strangers, corrupt politicians, drug dealers, traffickers, every bad guy imaginable, but since that night in the ranch, I’d never killed someone who had a personal connection to me.

I’d be breaking my sister’s heart all over again.

But if it had to be done, if Ethan Foster was a psychopath just like his father and his name on that list for a good reason, I’d be making up to her the years I’d left behind. I’d be protecting her like I should’ve been for the last decade.

“I’ll leave it with you,” Jay said, snapping me out of that same damn saccharine daydream of a family I neither had nor deserved. “Take the file and call me when you decide.” He stood up, downing his whiskey in one go and clapping me on the shoulder. “Be quick about it, yeah?”

“Sure.”

I didn’t watch him leave, ordering another drink instead. So much for investigating Ethan—now I’d been given his damn name on a hit list. And if I didn’t do it, whoever wanted him dead would just hire someone else anyway.

I needed to speak to Taryn. She was always the most forthright and level-headed person I knew, and I was crippled again by the image of her, the knowledge that I was just looking for flimsy excuses to go banging down her door.

But the wedding was still going on, so I’d have to wait.

Tomorrow, then, I decided. Tomorrow, and I would delve right back into the past I’d been so hell-bent on escaping a second time.

Chapter Three
Taryn

Sleep eluded me most of the night.

With a steaming cup of coffee clutched in my hand, still in my sleep shorts and oversized t-shirt, I called Justin to check on Daisy, hearing all about how she’d danced the night away at the lavish reception Ethan had put together for him and his new wife. It was a huge outdoor venue at their country house, white marquees and more pink roses and a live band. It sounded wonderful, and I was sad I’d missed it.

Damn Mason for destroying that precious day.

“Mommy?” Daisy asked quietly down the line.

“What, honey?”

“Auntie Anna missed you. She seemed really sad all night.”

He’d ruined it for Anna, too.

I shut my eyes tight, a guilt that shouldn’t have been my responsibility weighing on my shoulders. “I didn’t want to leave. I just had something real important to deal with.”

“More important than Auntie Anna and Uncle Ethan?”

If only I could’ve begun to explain. Daisy’s father was out there in the world, the man I’d told her stories about for years, the man she’d sweetly mourned in that way only a child could.

“Very, very important,” I stressed.

I said my goodbyes and sent my love to both of them. It felt good to speak to my baby, at least, and I flopped back onto my sofa with a long sigh, having no clue what I was going to do with my day.

I couldn’t just lay lie around and feel sorry for myself again like yesterday, mulling over the details of a
murder
committed by my daughter’s dad, which may or may not have been justified.

Would William Foster have deserved to die if he had, in fact, murdered Mason’s mother? I wondered if my mother had been killed, would I want the murderer to pay in blood.

Yes
.

Could I have done it myself, though? With my own hands? For that, I couldn’t process what kind of man Mason was—brave and reckless, or a cold-blooded psychopath. And for the misery he’d put us through—ten years of loss, my daughter’s entire lifetime spent thinking her father was in the ground. What kind of man does that?

A desperate one,
a tiny voice in my head said.
An angry and scared young man without direction.

That was no excuse. A reason, maybe, but not an excuse.

A knock on the door startled me out of my reverie. I stood tiredly, my joints creaking, and, with an almost dull feeling of inevitability, saw the shape of Mason through the frosted glass.

“Oh look,” I drawled, opening the door as many inches as the chain would allow. “It’s my resident ghost.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Are you gonna let me in or are you just gonna be sarcastic at me through a door-crack?”

“Third option.” I slammed the door in his face, turning and pressing my back to it. My heart was flip-flopping over and over, my stomach squirming. Just seeing him was difficult, looking into his familiar and not-so-familiar face.

“Taryn!” He banged a couple more times. “Open the damn door.”

“Go away.”

“I’ll stand out here all day if I have to.”

“Then I’ll just have to call the police,” I called back, feeling an instant chill. What would they do? I wasn’t sure I could expose Mason like that, no matter how angry I was.

It didn’t scare him off, though. “Please,” he said softly, a tone of voice that surprised me. “I have something really important to tell you. It’s about Ethan and it affects you all.”

I stood with a sinking feeling of dread. “What about Ethan?”

“Not through a closed door.”

He didn’t demand anymore, letting me take my time. I turned, slowly, and took the chain off, and there he stood, slouching and a little sheepish, his hands stuffed in his pockets. He was trying to look less intimidating to me, I thought.

It was working.

“Be quick about it,” I snapped, unwilling to give him any more inches than this one.

He walked in, looking around my hallway. “Nice place you’ve got here.”

It was. I loved my little home, where I’d singlehandedly raised my daughter. I worked damn hard with my brother, running our family’s diner in town to keep up with the mortgage payments and bills. I’d struggled, but ultimately done fine all these years without Mason. Surrounded by the people I loved, Anna, Ethan, Justin, my parents, I’d brought up my daughter to be smart and bright and full of life.

“The kitchen is straight ahead.” I pointed towards it, trying to keep him out of the living room, where he’d have to look at all the photographs of Daisy. There were plenty in the hall, too, but I urged him quickly through the house.

He stood with his back leaning against my kitchen counter, and I folded my arms to hide the tremble in my hands and the unevenness of my breath.

His presence was palpable, a torment on my frayed nerves. He was so damn beautiful, just like he ever was, and I couldn’t stop myself from wanting him. I felt sick over it, my stomach in knots.

That kiss at the church yesterday—it should never have happened. It had brought back to many memories, too much of the past worming its way through the cracks he’d caused by showing up.

“You ruined your sister’s wedding, by the way,” I blurted out, mostly to remind
myself
of the agony he’d caused before I got too carried away in the subdued, medium green of his eyes and the lush shape of his mouth. “I had to tell her you were there, and you can imagine how that went down.”

Mason bowed his head. “Shit.”

“Yeah.”

“Taryn, look, I can’t say sorry anymore because it doesn’t mean anything. It’s just a word. You know me—
knew
me. Words aren’t my thing, actions are, and I came here to tell you something today because I have to believe you might trust me again. I want to be totally honest with you. No more lies.”

“You can’t make up for ten years of lies with one truth.”

“I can try,” he said fiercely, his hands balling into fists. He still spoke with so much bluntness, never beating around the bush because, no, words were never his
thing,
and the ones he gave were always meaningful in some way. I struggled to reconcile that with the man who deceived me for so long and I couldn’t. “Ethan Foster is on a hit list. I’ve been asked to kill him.”

“Ethan?” I choked.

“I’ve taken the job, for now, but only long enough to buy some time to figure out what the hell to do.”

“What’s he done?” I shook my head. “He’s a good man.”

“What if he isn’t,” Mason said flatly. “What if he’s just like his father.”

“I didn’t know Mr. Foster that well, but I do know Ethan. Your sister knows Ethan.”

“I thought I knew Mr. Foster. You can’t be sure of anything, Taryn.”

“No,” I snapped, looking up at him through a frown. “I can’t,
can I
?”

He was still stubborn as always, too, folding his arms to mirror me, pressing his lips into a tight line. “You’re not listening to me.”

I spluttered in outrage. “How dare you—”

“Taryn, I am
telling
you that someone is paying good money for this man to die!” His voice raised, making my skin bump up all over. It wasn’t out of fear. “Generally, good men don’t end up on hit lists.”

“You’re telling me you’ve never murdered a good man because you didn’t look hard enough,” I challenged, and his expression darkened.

“I kill bad people.”

“You kill
people
.”

“Don’t make me regret coming here,” he snapped.

“I didn’t ask you to come here!” I realized I was taking steps towards him, closing the gap between us. “You are not welcome here, Mason.”

He fumed, his pupils dilating. At my next step forward, he swallowed thickly, his Adam’s apple bobbing.

“My sister could be in danger,” he said slowly, low and rough.

“I think you being here puts us all in danger,” I countered.

The whole kitchen felt charged, Mason’s whole demeanor a challenge. The air was thick with it, too warm against my bare arms and legs where I was very aware I was still in my pajamas. I didn’t even know why we were arguing anymore, but I knew I was getting closer to him. I knew I was trying to make him furious.

Mason’s eyes raked me up and down; he knew exactly what was going through my head.

“I think you should leave,” I said slowly, trying to enunciate every word as if that could make me mean it. “Death just seems to follow you everywhere, Mason, and I don’t want it around our daughter.”

“Where is she?”

“With my brother, until I’m sure you’re far away from here.”

“But Ethan,” he stressed.

I cut him off. “
Leave
.”

My voice shook atrociously, but not from fear. The longer he stood there, the more difficult it became to hate him, the intensity of that emotion wringing through my body until it turned into something else—just as sharp as hate, just as fierce. I was angry, blood-hot and bright red. I was a whole load of other things, too.

Mason’s eyes narrowed. “You sure about that?”

“Do I sound sure?” It was a dumb question, because I didn’t sound sure in the least. I sounded shaky, begging to be questioned.

He stepped forward. “Okay then, I’ll go.”

I nodded firmly, tensing all over as I realized I’d positioned myself to block the doorway to the hall, forcing him to squeeze past me in the tight space. Mason came close, looking down from his seemingly impossible height. He angled his body to step around me, his chest brushing against the skin of my shoulder, goose pimples breaking out all over my body. His breath ruffled my hair, sounded heavy like a shudder, and his heat was consuming, too much for my frozen stillness.

I lashed out without thinking, fisting a hand into his t-shirt and turning into his body.

Mason stood, waiting, as I slowly uncurled my hand against him.

What was I doing? I swallowed hard. His heart was beating rapidly but he didn’t move, letting me decide how to go on.

“If you want me,” he started, his hoarse voice so satisfying, “just for now, even if it’s never again, you can have me. You can have anything, Taryn.”

The earnestness, so unlike the hot and cold demeanor he’d presented so far, swept all the reason from my head. I moved into him, and like he remembered just how we fit together, he pulled me into his arms with a long-fingered hand against my lower back.

This was so dumb. I had never done anything this dumb in my whole life. Those hands that were touching me were the hands of a killer. The mouth I wanted to kiss was the mouth of a liar.

It didn’t matter.

I kissed him, or he kissed me; we clashed in the middle somewhere, me arching up and him leaning down. I didn’t want gentleness; I wanted
him
, raw and punishing like those painful days after he’d abandoned me.

The thought renewed the anger in me and I shoved his leather jacket off his shoulders until it hit the floor, my meaning to him explicitly clear.

Mason tucked both hands under my thighs and picked me up. I wrapped my legs around his waist and we stumbled, my back hitting the wall beside the calendar with a crack.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered against me.

I bit his bottom lip. “Shut up.”

I couldn’t bear to hear it, gripping the back of his neck and devouring his mouth again, rolling my hips as he ground me back against the wall. I felt his cock stiffening in his jeans and tried my hardest to focus on that, to lose myself in just the physical
.
The alternative was too terrifying to contemplate. I tried to cling to my fury and I couldn’t—it kept slipping through my fingers like fine sand.

Between us, I wrestled off his t-shirt and started attacking his buttons and zipper. Mason was always a strong young man, throwing around hay bales on the Fosters’ ranch all weekend long and clearing plates at the diner, but now his muscles stood out sharp under his tanned skin, shifting as he held me up so effortlessly.

I knew beyond a doubt that he wouldn’t drop me; it was absurd that the pure instinct to trust him still ran so subconsciously deep.

“Taryn,” he gasped, as I palmed his cock within the suffocating space between our bodies.

“You missed me, huh?” I asked sharply, stroking him quickly, hard. God, I’d missed
him
; I ached between my legs, the dull press of him there torturous.

“More than you would believe right now.”

I shook my head, so torn between wanting to hear his sincerity and wanting this to be the last time, the closure I so desperately needed.

“Then show me,” I demanded.

His expression turned determined, a small smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth—dammit, he had me. Heat flooded all through my body at that familiar roguish smirk.