His Motherless Little Twins (4 page)

“Actually, my most recent choice was a kitchen in a ski lodge.” It was a blatant dodge, but she didn't want to talk about it, didn't want to look up at him for fear he could find the answers he was seeking in her eyes. And they were there, she was sure of it.

“Before that.”

“In my life,
before that
doesn't matter,” she said, her voice now a whisper. “I've had a few of those and now I am what I am in the moment. Don't expect anything else.” He was going to respond to that. In fact, she was so sure of it she practically held her breath waiting for it, but when he didn't, Dinah finally did look up. “No response?” she asked. “No pithy little comeback?”

“Something I learned a long time ago is that when people drop those kinds of explosive statements, it's best to back away. If they want to explain it, they will. If they don't, you're at a safe distance.” He grinned. “Right now, I like the safety in this distance.”

“I appreciate that,” she said. And truly she did. There was no point starting a new life and blurting out all the unhappy parts of the old one every time the opportunity arose. While she wasn't really here to make new friends, or find a new start, she did want to make the most of the next few weeks, especially with the people she might see occasionally. And Eric Ramsey…she had a hunch she'd be seeing him again.
Nothing social, nothing even very friendly. But there was something about saving a life together that pulled people closer, at least for a little while. Besides, Eric might be here when she came to check on little Bryce. So why beat him over the head with all her baggage for what would amount to a few casual moments here and there? “People don't know when to observe boundaries. They step over the line, assume they have rights where they really have none, and the next thing you know…” They're cheating on you, or walking out of your life. “Thank you, Eric.”

“Thank you, Dinah.” He spoke the words, but even in the dim light his eyes said more. So much more it startled her.

“I…um…I'm glad we were able to work together.” His intense stare on her was unsettling. It was making her nervous. Causing her hands to shake. Yet she couldn't look away. Wanted to, but could not. “And I'm even more glad that things are going to work out for Bryce and Gabby.” The conversation was turning just plain awkward now. There was nothing more to say except goodbye. Yet she didn't want to. Not yet. “Anyway… I, um…I guess this is goodbye. I need to get back to Angela, and um…” Was it hot in here? Because she was suddenly burning up. “I'm sure we'll see each other again while I'm in White Elk. So…” She needed a fan, her cheeks were blazing so furiously. “So, I'll see you around.”

“See you around, Dinah Corday.” He winked.

Eric's voice so sexy she went weak in the knees. Maybe she was tired. Everything was catching up to her and a few hours' sleep would take care of whatever this was coming over her. Yes, that had to be it. She was tired. Her body was giving out on her. “Around,” she repeated, not making the slightest move to leave.

Suddenly, Eric was around on her side of the crib, and before she realized what was going on…or maybe she did
realize what was going on and didn't want to do anything about it, she was in his arms. Locked into a kiss. Deep, urgent. Lips pressed so hard she could scarcely find breath. Her arms snaked up around his neck like they'd done it a thousand times before, and her body willed itself into a tight press to his, until she could almost feel corded muscles, almost find her way deep inside him. But as suddenly as the kiss had started, it stopped. His awareness…her awareness… What they were doing shoved them apart with such a force that it was like a physical punch, one that knocked her back.

Of all the crazy, stupid things to do! How could she have?

And how could her knees still be wobbly from the force of one simple kiss?

Except it hadn't been simple. Nothing about that kiss had been simple, and she was reeling to find an explanation. What had caused it? Had it been about two people caught up in the moment, two people who'd waged the battle together and won? A kiss of celebration?

Yes, that made sense. A kiss of celebration. That sounded feasible, or feasible enough. Plus, she was tired. Exhausted.

Except it was a kiss that shook her to the very core. One that made her knees wobble so hard she had to grab hold of the crib rails. “I…I didn't mean for that to happen,” she stammered. “I've been accused of overreacting in emotional situations, and I think you've just seen that.” Although she'd never, ever, kissed anyone so impulsively before. “Sorry.” Lame excuse, but it was the best she could do. “So, it's been a long day. Like I said, I want to go spend some time with Angela, see if we can get up to the lodge so I can finally get settled in.”

If ever there was a perfect time to make her exit, this was it. Eric hadn't said word, not one single word in reaction. So all she had to do was grab up what was left of her strength,
forget her dignity, since that was long gone, hold her head high and walk out the door. Except her feet wouldn't move when she tried. Both were planted firmly to the tiled floor and going nowhere soon. Or maybe she simply didn't want to walk around him and risk falling into his arms again.

Eric didn't move either. And his face, even in the dim lights, was painted with sheer panic and perplexity. A sure sign of what he was thinking, which embarrassed her even more. It wasn't like she'd kissed every doctor with whom she'd shared a victory, because she hadn't. Yet one minute she was telling him to keep his boundaries, and the next minute those boundaries had tumbled down—that emotional overreaction Charles had berated her for. Maybe Charles had been right when he'd told her she was more suited, emotionally, to the kitchen. “Look, Eric, I shouldn't have—”

He thrust out his hand to stop her. Still scowling. Still perplexed. “What you did today with Bryce was nothing short of amazing, Dinah. I don't want to take anything away from that.”

In the uncomfortable moment between them, she shrugged for the lack of a better response.

“And for the record, I'm sorry about the way I behaved after we had that little collision on the road.”

“It doesn't matter,” she managed, barely sounding any more steady than she felt.

“But it does. I'd had one hell of a morning, between the floods and the hospital. My twin girls have been sick, and I had to leave to make sure they were safe, then I had to get back to the hospital right away. But they were frightened. Wanted me to stay home with them. Cried, begged. And nothing pulls at your heart harder than two little girls begging for you to stay. So I stayed longer than I should have, was distracted when I finally did leave, and you…” He chuckled nervously, “Well, you know the rest of the story.”

The rest of the story? Did he mean the part where she'd just kissed a married man? Somehow, with the casual way he acted around her, she wouldn't have guessed that about him. Who was she kidding, though? Her life was a testament to not guessing the right thing. And the right thing with Eric was that he wasn't only married, but married with children. A man with huge entanglements.

Well, something in her life was finally simple. One kiss,
and he'd been a willing part of it
, was where it ended. Actually, she was glad about that because her judgment wasn't going to be tested on this. They'd met their final boundary. Nothing came after it. Period. No doubts, no questions, nothing to wonder about. “How old are they?” she asked, at last finding enough strength to push her toward the door. “Your twins? How old are they?”

“Five, going on twenty-one. Spoiled rotten, and I'm not ashamed to admit it.”

“Their names?” she asked, backing her way around Eric, keeping herself well clear of him as he stood at the end of the crib.

“Pippa. She's older by nine minutes, and she's the outgoing one. My little extrovert who can't stay out of trouble. And Paige, my very serious introvert who tends to be more clingy than anything.”

By the time she got to the door leading to the hall, she half expected Eric to flip a photo wallet out of his pocket, like a kiss followed by a trip through the family archives was all in a day's work for him. But he didn't. Rather, he turned around, popped his stethoscope into his ears and had a good look at Bryce. Checked his breath sounds, his heart, his reflexes, probably glad for that whole awkward episode to be over with.

That's when Dinah escaped.

“Don't let me keep you from your wife any longer,” she
bit out as she fled the ICU. She made it to the hall, got halfway down it and sagged against the wall. What was she doing? How could she have failed to notice the ring on his finger? And how, even now, knowing what she did about Eric Ramsey, was his kiss was still lingering on her lips? It burned all the way through her, and as she raised her fingers to her lips, she knew it would linger a while longer. Against her will. Or maybe because of her will.

For a moment, she'd thought Eric was different. But he was like the rest of them, wasn't he? Her father who'd walked out on this family, her husband who'd cheated on her, her fiancé who'd seen a weakness in her and exploited it. Well, she'd been gullible again. It was her history. Her habit. They spoke, she believed, she got hurt.

 

The masses of humanity in the hall were cloying, as she regained enough strength to fight her way through them to get to her sister. So many people with no place to go, people reaching out, people in pain. But Dinah was in her own unbelievable pain, and she didn't see them all through the tears stinging her eyes. She was hurt, angry, but mostly humiliated. Her fault entirely. She had to get away. Had to find Angela and get out of there. But she was almost half the way to the waiting area when Eric caught up to her.

“Dinah!” he yelled over the crowd.

She heard him, but didn't stop.

“Dinah!” he yelled again, catching up to her and falling into step. “Did you think I'd leave my wife at home with the girls while I was out hitting on you? Is that why you ran out? Because you thought I was…” He glanced down at the ring on his finger. “That I'd kiss you the way I did if I was…”

She tried to twist away from him and go the other direction, but Eric stepped in front of her then stepped in front of
her again when she turned yet another way. “Look, Eric. I'll give you credit where it's due. You're a good doctor. But other than that, you do what you have to do, as long as it doesn't involve me. OK? I don't like men like you. No, let me restate that. I
hate
men like you, and I pity the women who keep falling for them because the result is always the same no matter how much they believe they're the one who will finally change him, finally tame the beast in him. Men like you don't tame. Once you've had a taste of what it's like to step outside the bounds of normal decency, you don't step back in. So, leave me alone. We've done what we had to do, and there's no reason to continue…anything.”

Deep breath
, Dinah, she kept telling herself.
Calm down
. This wasn't Damien Corday, her husband, who'd had the decency to wait six months into their marriage before cheating on her. It wasn't her father, a man who'd left his family because it hadn't been the family he'd wanted. Wasn't even Charles Lansing who'd turned on her in such a profound, hurtful way. This was Eric Ramsey, who was trying to cheat on Mrs. Eric Ramsey. Yes, pity the poor wife. But this time it was truly none of her business.

“Do I get to defend myself?”

“Against what?” Dinah snapped. She wouldn't look up at him, wouldn't take a long, slow journey into those gorgeous brown eyes because if she did she might do something stupid, like believe him. And the last thing she ever intended to do again was believe anything any man had to say. Sure, it was reactionary, but she had good cause to react the way she did.

“Against your accusations. You get to fling them at me, so I should have the opportunity to deflect them. To defend myself.”

“I don't care what you have to say, Eric, because I've heard…
everything
. All the excuses, all the explanations. All the lies. There's nothing new under the sun, you know.”

He opened his mouth to speak, to compound his lie, to make an even bigger fool of her, but at that very same moment a tiny figure in a pink rain slicker came running through the hall, directly to Eric, followed by an identical little figure in another pink rain slicker.

“Daddy!” Eric spun to see them, then braced himself against the inevitable as both little girls launched themselves into his arms at the very same time.

Galoshes halfway to their knees, rain slickers all the way down to the galoshes, rain hats covering up most of their faces, it was hard to see the little girls, but Dinah's heart did pound a little harder as Eric went down on one knee and scooped them both up into his embrace. They were giggling and laughing and splashing him with water dripping from their slickers, almost knocking him flat on his back in their exuberance.

“OK, girls,” their mother said, coming up from behind. “I told you not to overwhelm your father. Remember he's been doing a very difficult surgery, and he's tired.”

“But we brought him cookies,” one of the girls cried.

“We've been baking,” the woman Dinah took to be Eric's wife said. “And baking, and baking. They were bored, and they missed you.”

“Well, you know how I love your cookies!” Eric exclaimed, extricating himself from the girls and standing up. Once he was fully upright, both girls immediately latched on to him again, one girl holding on to each of his legs.

“Are you coming home now, Daddy?” one of the girls asked.

“Sorry, but I can't leave here yet. We're too busy. Too many people still coming in and you know Daddy has to stay here and take care of them.”