His Eyes (10 page)

Smiling, I took his hand and squeezed it between both of mine. “Okay.”

“Good night.” Tristan climbed out of my car and swung the door shut. I watched until he was inside the house and then sighed. This was not something I had expected; I had never kissed like that before. And keeping us hidden, especially from nosy little brothers, wasn’t going to be easy. Still, the excited tremble of my heart told me that Tristan was worth it.

“What a night,” I whispered to my Camry and headed home.

Wednesday morning, I vowed to sleep in as long as possible; a new high school graduate deserves her beauty rest. While my mind was still clouded, I heard the sound of beeping. I growled as I reached out from the warm cocoon of my bed and smacked the top of my alarm clock. The beeping continued. I moaned, pulling the pillow from on top of my head, and listened. It took me a foggy second to realize that the sound wasn’t just plain beeping, but the tune of U2’s “Where the Streets Have No Name.”

“Ugh, phone,” I slurred and tumbled out of bed. Listening for the sound, I dug into my pile of dirty clothes. After a moment, I successfully pulled out my purse, from which fell my cell phone. I glared at it while it hummed mindlessly, before I answered, “hello?”

The phone emitted Mrs. Edmund’s voice. “Amy? Is that you?”

“Uh, yeah?” I replied, confused.

“I’m sorry to bother you. I know I said this was your day off—you weren’t sleeping, were you?” I shook my head, hoping to sooth my wild bed hair. There was no sense complaining to the woman paying me $20 an hour. “I’m up.”

“Oh good,” she said too cheerily. “I was wondering if you could do me a favor? I need you to pick Lexus up from the airport.”

still groggy, I frowned; did she have a new car
airmailed
to her? Well, I supposed it was possible. I stammered, “O-okay, I guess. I’ll have to ask my friend to come, so I can drive it to your house and she can take my car.”

There was a long pause, then Mrs. Edmund said slowly, “Dear...she’s not an ‘it.’ Lexus is Tristan’s girlfriend.”

For a moment, time stopped. I saw black and felt sick and ice cold. Then, I blinked and it was like nothing had changed. My heart was still beating. I was still breathing. What had just happened? I felt numb.

It was too early. And, what was that nightmare? I could almost remember...something horrible, too horrible to think about...

“Are you there?”

I jumped at the sound of Mrs. Edmund’s voice. Realizing I wasn’t asleep, I choked, “Yeah.”

“So...you can pick her up?” she prompted as if I was a small child.

I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “Sure. Yeah.”

“Wonderful!” she cried. “That’s such a help, Amy. She’ll be landing in about a half-hour. It’s a private plane, so I’m sure you’ll know who she is! Oh, and she doesn’t know about Tristan being blind, yet, so don’t say anything. He’ll talk to her. Anyway, I have to run to work, so I’ll talk to you later!” I nodded absently and turned off my phone.

For some reason, I always thought when the world ended it’d be louder.

* * *

With a sigh, I took the exit to Grayfield Area Airport. Pulling up to the loading area, I flopped my head against my seat. This couldn’t have happened. I couldn’t have fall en for him. I couldn’t have fall en for a guy who had... He had lots of girlfriends
before
, but how could he have kissed me like
that
if...if...

guy who had... He had lots of girlfriends
before
, but how could he have kissed me like
that
if...if...

I opened my eyes and looked into my rearview mirror. My eyes widened as I saw a girl standing on the curb—alone. She was the Perfect Female. She looked like I could never look; she was larger and smaller in all the right places. She was a good 5’10” with long legs. She had the perfect bronze tan—not too dark, not too light. Her hair was a shimmering golden blonde with accenting high- and lowlights.

I sighed. Maybe it wasn’t her...maybe.

I peeled myself from my car. Immediately catching my movement, her angled face snapped in my direction. She was like a wildcat; as I walked toward her, she slunk toward me. Her eyes were an intense aqua-green and they scanned my outfit. The Creature flashed a brief, white smile and shouldered her large bag. Her voice was light, if subtly condescending. “You must be the girl Trist’s mom sent.” The
girl
?! Thoughts of turning around and leaving floated through my head. I frowned. “I’m Amy.” She dramatically dropped her bag to the ground like it weighed a ton. “Great. Can you give me a hand with this?”

Like a drone, I carried the luggage to my car. The bag was so big that it took me five minutes to shove it inside my tiny backseat. I heard The Creature give a little sniff of distain when she climbed into the passenger side of my car. I bit my lip, feeling awkward with the whole situation. What was I supposed to
say
to her? I turned on the ignition and managed, “Where are you from?” She tossed her hair and flipped down the visor to check herself in the mirror. “Oh, I’m from Chicago. I was away on a modeling gig.” She snapped the visor back up. “Maybe you’ve seen me, before? Gosh, I’ve been in
so
many ads!”

I rolled my eyes and pulled onto the highway. “Um, no, I can’t say that I have.”

“Oh.” She lazily stuck her hand out the window to feel the breeze. “Well, a lot of it’s in Europe. It’ll get to the States, eventually.” She laughed. “To think, just last summer I was complaining to Tristan how I wasn’t known
anywhere
!”

My throat felt dry. “You were dating him last summer?”

“Yeah. I think we were talking at one of his equestrian shows. Trist’s quite an accomplished show-jumper,” she gushed. “And who could I resist him in a suit?” I veered and a car in the next lane honked at me.

No more small talk. I was done. I leaned on the gas.

The Creature continued talking, no longer needing any encouragement. “And that was
some
summer!

His mother was always going on about what beautiful kids we’ll have someday. She’s so sweet! And it’s true; I told him that he could come and do modeling with me. But, he had to finish
school
.” Feeling like I couldn’t take another word, I cried manically, “Here’s the exit!” and turned the wheel so sharply that my Camry gave a protesting groan. The fact that I’d exited the highway did nothing to impact the velocity at which we were hurtling toward the Edmunds’ house. In fact, the longer we were in the car, the faster I pushed my little car to fly. And fly it did. In record time and with a very hard slam on the brakes, I parked in the driveway.

I left my car running and, without a backward look at The Creature, I headed directly into the house and up the stairs. I walked robotically all the way to Tristan’s doorway, while she followed. Then I stopped, realizing that I didn’t know what to say. I was a jumble of emotions—too many emotions. I stood still and was vaguely amazed that I was still managing to breathe.

But Tristan knew I was there.

He was lying calmly on his bed with his hands clasped on his chest as if he had been expecting me. He had on headphones connected to a walkman; I didn’t have to wonder what CD he was listening to. He hit the stop button on the player and his bright smile shone in my direction. I felt my heart liquefy. “Hey! Mom said you were coming. I hadn’t thought you—”

“Of
course
I had to see you! Your mom wasn’t supposed to tell,” cried the model while her tan legs strode past me and into the room.

strode past me and into the room.

I saw Tristan’s perfect smile freeze unnaturally on his face. She had stolen the smile—
my
smile!

He choked, “Lexus?”

“Who else would it be?” she laughed and pressed her lips against his.

The room spun. I felt sick. I held onto the doorframe and sputtered, “I-I’m going to get a drink of water.”

“Would you get me something, too?” The Creature purred.

I shook my head and fled from the room. There was no reason to be so upset. No reason. He was just a boy and this was just my job. There were no feelings involved. None. Before, when I thought there were, I was wrong. I was stupid. I was
so
wrong.

My head fixed straight ahead, I walked into the kitchen without seeing much of anything. I would have kept moving in my zombie-like state, if I hadn’t run into something. Instinctively, I stopped and looked down.

Blinking, my eyes came to focus on a small figure that was lying on the ground, frowning up at me. It took me another second to realize that I’d knocked her down. I gasped, “I’m so sorry, Marly! Are you okay?” She nodded as I helped her to her feet.

“Amy! Why are you here?”

I turned to see Chris walking toward me from the counter, on which he was building a Lego spaceship. I stuttered a reply. “I-I’m dropping someone off.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Mom said you had the day off.”

“Yeah, I know.” I sighed. “Where is your mom?”

“Oh, she’ll be back soon. She’s ‘getting her hair done.’” Chris glanced at Marly and whispered to me from behind his hand, “That means she’s at her therapist.”

“I see.”

Grinning, he asked, “
Sooo
, who’d ya bring?”

“Well....” I looked toward the floor, suddenly finding it hard to form words. “Uh, your brother’s girlfriend.” The boy’s mouth dropped toward the floor. He shut his eyes and moaned, “Nooo!” I threw my hands up in the air. This was one
tiny
detail everyone knew, but me? I muttered, “Great, just great.”

I took a glass from the cupboard and began to fill it with water from the faucet. Feeling a tug on my jeans, I looked down to see Marly. Her eyes were wide with honesty while her small voice proclaimed,

“We like you more, Amy.”

I smiled weakly, patting her head. I choked, “Thanks.”

Breathing deeply, I walked back upstairs and willed myself to be calm. This was only an inconvenience, a little Perfect Female inconvenience. I stepped into the doorway, looked up, and literally felt my heart fall clear out of my body. The Creature was lying next to him on the bed. She was tracing lazy circles on his arm with her fingertip, while whispering into his ear. Tristan looked frozen, but this did nothing to dismiss the fact that he wasn’t
doing
anything about it!

I couldn’t move. I was struck by the scene like someone witnessing a horrible car accident—I couldn’t look away. I heard her voice asking, “Why are you wearing these inside?” while her hand slid toward his glasses. He pushed her away and spoke to me like he’d known I was standing there. “Does she know?” The Creature appeared shocked and a little indignant to see me. She looked back-and-forth between us, as if calculating the parameters of our relationship.

I stalled, “Tristan....”

“Does she?” he demanded.

“No.” My feet felt cold and I looked down to find that the glass of water had slipped from my numb hands.

“Know what?” she asked.

In my state of shock, the words came easily. “That he’s blind.”

“
What
?” The Creature screeched unnaturally and pulled away from him, while waving a hand in front of his face. She gasped with realization. “What the
hell
, Tristan?! Why didn’t you tell me? When did this happen?”

He spoke monotonously, “Two, three months ago at a competition. You wouldn’t know because you dumped me when you left.”

I blinked in surprise.

“That was just
temporary
!” The Creature reared onto her feet. “I don’t know how I feel about this, Tristan.”

“I didn’t know you were coming back,” he said emotionlessly. “After all, you didn’t come for his funeral.”

“It was a nine-month contract.” She began to cry unjustified tears. “I was
busy
!”

“Exactly.”

The Creature begged, “Don’t be like that, Tristan! Remember the fun we had—”

“That doesn’t make up for it.”

Her face tightened, until she exploded in a cry of, “Ohmygosh, you’re
blind
,” and swept past me.

I tried to not look at him. I tried to not feel that he was in pain. But I couldn’t stop myself. I sat on the bed next to him, staring at his face and trying to figure out what was going on inside of his head. I said softly,

“I’m sorry,” and reached a hand out to place on top of his. I couldn’t suppress a gasp when he pulled his hand away from me.

His face was stony and his voice cold as he said, “I need to be alone.” The flame of anger inside of my chest erupted into a bonfire. I was too mad to even speak. He
needed
to be alone?
He
needed to be alone? What about what
I
needed?! What about the fact that
I
had been betrayed? Didn’t he even
think
about that? Was I just a mistake? Didn’t he even
consider
me? If only I could have put any one question into words—but I couldn’t.

In a frenzy, I flew from the house, threw my car into Drive, and squealed my tires as I sped away from the Edmunds’ house. I didn’t make it far down the street, when I realized that I was in no state to be driving. I pulled to the side of the road and did the first thing that came to mind: I called Ahna.

“Ahna.” My voice sounded hall ow and empty, even to my own ears. “I’m not dying, so don’t ask.” Without hesitation, she said, “What did that jerk do?”

“He has a girlfriend...or an ex-girlfriend. I don’t know, but she’s here.”

“He
what
?” she screamed so loudly that I pulled the phone away from my ear. “After he went to dinner with your parents? And came to our graduation? And kissed you?”

“And they
knew
!” I added to the rant. “The whole family knew! Why didn’t they tell me? He’s so—did they
really
think—
ugh
! And the little brother, always making jokes about us! I could just—I could
just
!” I gave a huge sigh. “I don’t know, Ahna. I’ve felt like crying all day, but I can’t. Everything still feels like a bad dream; I can’t believe it. I was so stupid.”

“No, you weren’t!” she said quickly. “I mean, he kissed you too, didn’t he?” I shook my head. “Yeah, I think...yeah. But what does
that
mean? That he’s really good at playing girls?” I slammed my hand into my steering wheel. “I mean, I
knew
he had had lots of girlfriends. He didn’t hide it.