His Best Mistake (13 page)

Kevin moved so swiftly, Leah didn’t know what had hit her until he had her in a luscious lip-lock. Once they parted, he said, “Carly will survive a night without us, and so will you. Besides, I’ll keep you occupied.”

The thought of being completely alone with Kevin blanketed Leah’s arms in goose bumps, belying the warmth that had begun to settle in other unseen places. “We could pick her up around ten.”

“Midnight.”

“Eleven.”

Kevin ran both hands through his damp hair and stared at the ceiling for a moment. “If that’s what it takes for you to give us some time alone, then it’s a deal. But we’re not going to pick her up a minute earlier.”

Leah dumped too much sugar into her glass, stirred a good deal of the liquid onto the counter then grabbed a rag and wiped it up with a vengeance. “When is everyone leaving?”

“Soon, I hope.”

As much as Leah loved her baby, she felt the same. The sooner everyone departed, the sooner she could relax and not have to watch every word she said around his family. And the sooner she’d be alone with Kevin.

That point-of-no-return moment was almost upon
her. The moment when she’d have to take the proverbial plunge and finally have what she’d fantasized about for days.

And she was absolutely going to jump.

A
S SOON AS
the last of the family had left, Kevin turned from the door to find Leah had disappeared. He worried she was regretting sending Carly off with her aunt and uncle. Worried even more that she was regretting being alone with him.

After a futile search of the house, he walked back onto the deck to find Leah swimming laps in the pool. He took a seat in one chair and watched her for several minutes until she finally came up for air and started wading toward him.

The automatic pool light had come on, bathing her in aqua blue, making her hazel eyes appear almost translucent. She moved through water like some sea goddess and stepped onto the stairs looking like his favorite fantasy. Although she didn’t completely exit the pool, she did finally give him a great view of her body encased in a black bikini. A bikini that wouldn’t be considered risqué under any circumstance. The bottoms were cut just below the navel and high on the legs, the top had thin straps and enough of a plunge to reveal some cleavage. He didn’t care how tasteful it was, the suit had the impact of a rocket launcher, and he definitely had liftoff.

She rested one hand on the rail and swept the other through the water. “Aren’t you going to join me?”

Did monkeys swing from trees? He shifted in the chair and rubbed a palm down his abdomen, drawing her attention. “I don’t know. I’ve been swimming most of the day. Maybe we should talk about this first.”

Without advance warning, she reached behind her, dispensed with the top and threw it onto the deck. “Do you still want to talk?”

Oh hell, no. “Is that your version of waving the white flag of surrender?”

“It’s black, and I surrendered the minute you walked out here.”

Kevin couldn’t exactly explain his hesitancy other than he had to be sure she knew what she was getting into. “If I come in there with you, I’m not going to want to stop at just a swim.”

“I’m not going to stop you, either.”

Leaving all his reservations in the dirt, he had the presence of mind to kick off his flip-flops but didn’t even bother removing his T-shirt and trunks…yet. When he stood and started toward the pool, Leah swam away before he even made it down the first step.

Not a problem. He’d worked summers in high school as a lifeguard. Even if that hadn’t been the case, he owned enough sexual energy at the moment to shoot him through the water like a human propeller. After only a few strokes, he had Leah in his arms and his mouth covering hers in a kiss that probably
would
be considered risqué under any circumstance.

They treaded water for a while until Kevin moved to the shallow end of the pool, allowing his feet to
touch the bottom. Leah broke the kiss first and frowned. “I’m feeling a little self-conscious since I’m almost naked and you’re fully dressed.”

When she clasped the hem of his shirt, he raised his arms and let her lift it over his head. “Satisfied?” he asked as he watched her hurl it onto the deck.

“Yes, but what did I feel underneath your arm?”

Damn. The scar from the line they’d used to administer the chemo. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Lift up your arm and I’ll show you what I’m talking about.”

He could appease her, or ignore her. “It’s probably just the remnants of some football injury.”

“I know every inch of your body, Kevin, and I don’t remember any scar on the underside of your arm.”

“Quit being the doctor, Leah. It’s nothing, I promise.” He kissed her again. “Now where were we?”

“I believe we were getting you undressed.”

As she grabbed the waistband of his trunks, he brought her hands up to his chest. “Don’t rush this,” he said. “I’m so jacked up right now, it’s going to be over before it starts if we’re not careful.”

She smiled. “Now you know how I felt on the deck the other night.”

“I’d like to know how you feel right now.” He pressed his palms against her lower back, bent his head and with the tip of his tongue followed the path of a trickle of water sliding down her chest from her throat.

When he closed his mouth over her breast, she arched her back and dug her fingernails into his shoul
ders. He’d seen her like this before, trembling, needy, hanging on to the last shred of control. And he knew precisely how to deal with this situation.

Kevin pulled Leah’s legs around his waist then carried her up the steps and to the blanket Aidan had spread out beneath the oak earlier that day. He set her on her feet and, without saying a word, worked her bathing suit bottoms down her hips. When they dropped to the ground, she stepped out of them and kicked them aside.

He moved back a step and visually traveled down her body, taking in the sight of the familiar territory he’d explored before. But that made the prospect of doing it again no less exciting. “You’re as beautiful as I remember.”

She lowered her eyes. “I’m ten pounds heavier and I have a few stretch marks and—”

He halted her uncharacteristic self-deprecation with a light kiss. “I said you’re beautiful. End of discussion. Besides, you’re not in the mood to talk, remember?”

She sucked in a ragged breath. “You’re right.”

“And I happen to know exactly what you’re in the mood for.”

Before he could take her down on the blanket to demonstrate how well he knew her, she said, “We can’t do this, Kevin.”

What a time for her to reconsider. “Whatever you want, Leah. I’m not going to force the issue.”

“I meant to say we can’t do this here unless you get a condom.”

Leah had inadvertently provided the perfect opening. He could tell her they might not need a condom, and why. Or he could just let it go for now, and that’s what he planned to do. Maybe he chose not to come clean because the outcome of the test was still unknown. Maybe it was latent selfishness coming into play. Maybe he just couldn’t bring himself to confess, not when he could show her how much he still cared for her in the best way he knew how.

Besides, he was, and had always been, much better with actions than with words, at least when it came to personal relationships. Strange considering he made a living with words. But those came easily. Others didn’t.

“Kevin?” she asked when he failed to respond. “Are you okay?”

He would be, as soon as her made love to her. “Yeah. I’ll be right back.”

V
ERY EARLY ON
in their relationship, Leah had learned one important thing about Kevin O’Brien. He knew what women liked. Countless times he’d taken her into the realm of mindless pleasure with his skill as a lover. But first and foremost, he had a penchant for tempting her straight into oblivion. Apparently that hadn’t changed.

While she stretched out on the blanket to await his undivided attention, he stood a few feet away, staring at her until she couldn’t stand the suspense any longer.

“Did you suddenly turn shy on me, Kevin, or do you want me to beg you?”

“Once I join you on that blanket, there won’t be any turning back.”

She only wanted to go forward with no thoughts of the past, or what might have been. Not even what could be. Thinking about any of that would be too painful. “I want to be with you, Kevin. I don’t know what else I can do to convince you.”

“I’m convinced.” He tossed the condom onto the ground beside her and finally slid the trunks down his
narrow hips, alleviating any doubts that he wanted her, too. At least physically.

When he moved onto the blanket, he simply took her into his arms and held her for a moment. There was such a surprising tenderness to his kiss in the beginning, but as it had been between them before, passion and chemistry soon took hold.

His lips drifted down her body, and Leah briefly thought about the hazard in allowing this much intimacy. She thought about how easily she could lose herself to him again. But she quickly tossed those concerns aside, closed her eyes and immersed herself in the sensations. A warm breeze blew over her, but it did nothing to lessen the heat. Only Kevin could ease the need, and he did, using his mouth with so much persuasion that she gripped the blanket.

At first he showed some restraint, taking her almost to the brink before letting up without quite letting her down. She knew exactly what he was doing—drawing it out until she couldn’t stand it any longer. And just when she’d reached that point, he took her all the way. She couldn’t stop the involuntary lift of her hips or the urge to cry out or the climax that came all too quickly. Yet it wasn’t enough.

As if he sensed that, Kevin sat up and tore open the foil packet with hands that appeared to be shaking. Leah could relate. She was shaking, as well. As he eased inside her, he let out a long breath and kept his gaze centered on hers. “Stay still a minute,” he said. “I want to remember this.”

She wasn’t sure if he meant he wanted to recall all the times before, or if he was already preparing to say goodbye again. She didn’t have time to ponder that when he began to move, slowly, slowly, until he quickened the pace. She became absorbed in the flex of his muscles beneath her palms, the absolute power he held over her. He had always been somewhat of a chameleon during lovemaking—sometimes playful, sometimes seductively taunting—yet he’d never been as intense as he was right now. Especially his eyes that he kept fixed on hers.

Leah sensed a desperation in the way he kissed her, the way he held her as if he couldn’t get close enough. The way he spoke to her in a hoarse whisper, describing how she felt surrounding him. How she was driving him
crazy
. He moved his hips against her and touched her in a way that led her to believe he was determined not to find his own release until she found hers again.

She wanted him to stop the pleasurable torment. To never stop. “Kevin, I’m not sure I can take it.”

“You can, babe. You will.”

And she did, with much more force than she ever thought possible.

Kevin then lost his grip on his coveted control and with one final thrust, he groaned, shuddered and stilled against her.

The sound of their labored breathing cut into the quiet of the night as Leah wondered if her heart rate would ever return to normal. She also questioned if she’d ever be able to find another man who could make
love to her as well as Kevin could. If she would always compare any other man to him. If any man would ever measure up.

After a time, Kevin rolled to his back, taking her with him. For several moments, they stayed that way, holding each other, her head resting on his chest and his fingertips drifting up and down her back.

When the lure of sleep began to settle over her, Leah realized the time had come to face reality. “We need to pick up our daughter.”

He brushed a wayward lock of hair away from her cheek and tucked it behind her ear. “Mallory plans to keep Carly until morning unless we call and say we’re on our way. I don’t want to make that call.”

She lifted her head to look at him. “I don’t know, Kevin. She’ll—”

“—be fine. I’m sure she’s already asleep and I don’t see any benefit in dragging her out of bed in the middle of the night. I’m also not ready to end this. We have to make up for lost time.”

That did make sense, at least the part about not disturbing the baby. But Leah still had a few misgivings. Making up for lost time could carry a high cost.

He kissed her again. Leisurely, seductively. “Be with me, Leah. In my bed, all night. You won’t regret it.”

She wasn’t so sure about that. Yet spending the next few hours in his bed, making love with him again, making more memories, overrode the last of her concerns. “Okay, I’ll stay with you.” At least for the night.

W
HEN THE
cell phone rang not long after dawn, Kevin issued a mild curse as Leah moved to the opposite side of the bed to answer it. Even though he was sapped of strength after his and Leah’s recent lengthy shower, he wouldn’t mind another round of lovemaking before they both had to face the day. Those plans could go awry if she was being summoned to work, which he suspected to be the case.

“Hi, Mom.”

So much for the work theory. Kevin glanced at Leah who pulled the sheet up to her neck and sent him a forlorn look.

After a long pause, Leah said, “Really, everything’s great. Carly’s great. I’m great.”

Kevin rested his forearm over his eyes and tried not to listen to the conversation. But he couldn’t help wondering exactly what her mother had said when Leah responded with, “No, I haven’t done anything stupid.”

He assumed that probably involved him, and he hoped Leah believed her own words. After she had all day to think about what they’d done last night—and this morning—she might question her intelligence.

A few minutes later, Leah hung up the phone and collapsed back onto the pillow. “That was my mother.”

“I’d already figured that one out.” Kevin rolled to his side to face her. “Kind of early for her to be calling.”

“Yes, but she knows my schedule. She also wanted to let me know that she and my dad are leaving for Europe this evening. And more importantly, she learned
that a local pediatrician is retiring in two months. He’s looking for someone to take over his practice.”

Kevin was overcome with a strong sense of urgency and fear that he was on the verge of losing her if he didn’t act fast. Needing her closer, he patted the empty space beside him. “Come here. You’re too far away.”

She scooted over and settled in the crook of his arm. “I have to get ready for work.”

“It’s still early,” he said. “And I’ll pick Carly up from Mallory’s and keep her with me all day, if that’s okay with you.”

“It’s more than okay, Kevin. You’ve proven you can take care of her, so I don’t see why she needs to go back to the day care while we’re here.”

He liked that he’d earned her trust when it came to Carly, but he didn’t care for the
while we’re here
part. “What time do you have to be at the hospital?”

“Not until eight-thirty.”

Kevin glanced at the clock. “It’s a little past seven.”

She tapped her fingertip against her chin. “Now I wonder how we can spend the next hour or so. Wait, an idea is coming to me.”

Leah streamed her hand down his belly, but before she reached her intended target, Kevin clasped her wrist and halted her progress. “As much as I appreciate your idea, we need to have a conversation first.” The content of that conversation was still up for grabs.

She lifted the sheet and grinned. “Looks like one of your brains likes my idea better.”

Yeah, that brain definitely had a mind of its own. “I want to talk about last night.”

She shifted away from him and focused on the ceiling. “You don’t have to say anything, Kevin. I know what last night meant. We both needed the diversion.”

“Diversion?” That sent Kevin off the bed to retrieve a pair of pajama bottoms. Once he had those on, he perched on the edge of the mattress beside her. “It was a hell of a lot more than that to me, Leah.”

She closed her eyes and said, “Don’t complicate matters by saying what you believe I want to hear, Kevin.”

“Don’t tell you that I don’t want you to leave at all?” He had absolutely no right to ask that of her, but he hadn’t been able to stop the words from spilling out of his mouth.

Her eyes snapped open and she pinned him in place with a serious stare. “You don’t mean that.”

“Yeah, I do.” And he did, even though the request was ill-timed.

“You’re only offering because of Carly,” she said.

He understood why she would think that. “I’ll admit that I can’t stand the thought of you taking her away from me. But I don’t want to lose you again, either.”

She sat up and hugged her knees to her chest. “Let’s just say I’m crazy enough to consider taking our relationship to the next level. Where do we go from here? You’re planning on relocating to Atlanta and I’m going back to Mississippi. And even if we worked that out, do we just live together?”

He wanted more than that, but he couldn’t offer
more right then. Not until he knew for certain what the future might hold. “I don’t have all the answers yet, but living together is a start. I don’t want to give up on us.”

“And what happens if you get tired of me?”

“I’m not going to get tired of you, Leah. I…” Damn, he wasn’t any good at voicing emotions. He never had been. “I care about you.”

“I care about my car, too, Kevin. And if I recall correctly, last summer in Cabo you said you cared about me and then you broke it off a week later.”

“It’s different this time.”

“What’s different, Kevin, other than we have a child together?”

He had to tell her the truth, but he couldn’t tell her everything until he acquired all the information. Information that hinged on the results of the lab work that he’d begun to dread with every passing moment.

But he could tell her the one thing that might make a difference, something he’d never told her before. He decided to reserve that declaration for later, when it might be his last hope. “Like I’ve previously stated, I had my reasons for doing what I did last year.”

“You’re right. You’ve already said that. But at some point in time, you’re going to have to share those reasons with me.”

“I know, but it’s going to take more time than we have this morning. When you get home tonight, I promise I’ll tell you everything then.” In the meantime, he intended to take advantage of the hour they had left, and continue to hope.

He rolled to his side, tugged her back into his arms and kissed her. But before he could utilize his powers of persuasion, the phone rang again. This time, his phone.

If Mallory didn’t still have temporary custody of his daughter, Kevin wouldn’t have bothered to answer. But because of that, he fumbled for the phone and barked out an irritable. “Yeah.”

“Are you going to be home this afternoon?”

He sat up and draped his legs over the side of the bed. “It’s barely morning, Devin. I’m not even awake.” Not necessarily the case. His brother’s question had him wide awake.

“I thought I’d stop by around three.”

“Any particular reason?” Kevin suspected he already knew the reason.

“I had to come into the hospital early and I did what you asked. I put a rush on your results. But I’d rather not discuss it over the phone.”

Kevin didn’t want to discuss it at all, particularly if Devin felt as if he needed to deliver the news in person. That could mean only one thing. “Sure. I’ll see you then.”

He hung up the phone and fell back onto the bed, feeling as if his entire world was on the verge of coming apart at the seams.

Leah curled up close to his side and kissed his neck. “Is everything okay?”

Not in the least. “Yeah. Devin’s going to be in the neighborhood and he wanted to stop by to see Carly.”
Only one more lie to add to the many he’d been doling out.

She lifted her head and surveyed his face. “Are you sure nothing’s wrong?”

Kevin wasn’t sure about anything, except that right now, he only wanted to lose himself in Leah, before he had to face reality once more.

With that in mind, he brought her back into his arms and whispered, “Now let’s get back to your idea, while we still have time.”

T
HE SOMBER LOOK
on his brother’s face as he stood on the porch served to confirm Kevin’s suspicions—the news wasn’t going to be good.

As badly as he hated to hear the truth, he opened the door anyway, stepped aside and said, “Come in, Dev.”

They walked the hall in silence and when they reached the den, Devin slipped his hands in his pockets and looked around. “Is Leah here?”

“Not yet.”

“The baby?”

“Taking a nap. And now that we’ve established who’s home and who isn’t, just say what you need to say.”

Devin withdrew an envelope from his inside jacket pocket and handed it to him. “This is everything in writing.”

Kevin withdrew the piece of paper and scanned the text, some of which made little sense. “Care to interpret?”

“The good news is, you’re still producing sperm.
The bad news is, you’re producing so few that you’re clinically sterile.”

No matter how much he’d prepared to hear that word, Kevin still wanted to hit something. “This is pretty damned ironic. A couple of years ago, being sterile might not have been that big of a deal. But now that I have Carly, I feel like nothing about my life meant anything before her.” Before Leah, too. “But I guess this is fitting punishment for all my previous sins.”

Devin shook his head. “You won’t ever get me to buy into the whole divine retribution thing, Kevin. Too many bad things happen to good people and that includes you, too. You didn’t warrant getting sick any more than anyone else.”