Hilda - The Challenge (9 page)

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Authors: Paul Kater

BOOK: Hilda - The Challenge
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William grabbed hold of both brooms and
walked over to the house. He wondered about the odd broom that was
next to the door, put the two he carried next to it and went
inside. "Holy Bejeebus", he said. At the table with Hilda was the
most hideous woman he had ever seen. Even his wildest and most
creative nightmares could not conjure up something like that. She
looked like a skeleton with skin and clothes on, had a big head
with the occasional hair. The woman looked like one big wrinkle
although her nose remained prominently visible.

"Well, that's him," Hilda said to the
nightmare in black as she saw William. "This is William. William,
please meet Babs, my bestest girlfriend. Or Baba Yaga as she is
known to most."

The book salesman of course had heard, or
rather read about Baba Yaga. There had been drawings of the witch
in some of them, but none of them did any credit to her as she
stood there in real life. He was too stunned and appalled to faint
or run away. Instead he did the only right thing.

"Baba Yaga. I have heard a lot about you.
Pleased to meet you." William did wonder if he should offer her his
hand. He was not convinced she'd give it back.

"As long as it's only bad things, then I'm
happy," the ghastly witch cackled, giving William the creeps.
"Can't have people thinking good things about us, can we, Hilly
baby?"

Baba Yaga sat down again. A kettle with tea
flew in from the kitchen, closely followed by a tray of
cookies.

"Come sit, William," Hilda said with a smile,
patting the seat of the chair next to her. He took off the black
cloak and then sat down, stumped by her sudden almost affectionate
behaviour.

"This is the man I talked about this morning,
Babs," Hilda continued. "This is who I knocked out."

Baba Yaga looked William over inch by inch.
"Nice garb," she said, "but hardly what he's supposed to wear, is
it? Not much magic in him. So where'd you dig him up?"

Hilda looked at William, a blush on her face.
He understood that she had not told her bestest girlfriend about
the strange visit to his world, so he winked at her. "Do you tell
her, or will I tell her?"

Hilda's eyes became large for a moment. "I'll
tell her. Just tell me when I forget something, okay?"

William nodded and got up to pour tea for
everyone as Hilda started telling Baba Yaga about the strange
happenings that she had encountered so many years ago. Baba Yaga's
eyes probably also became bigger and bigger, but he was not able to
discern them between the folds of her wrinkles.

When Hilda reached the point where it became
clear that William had been the only person that could get her back
to her own world, Baba Yaga asked him if he by chance was magical
in his own world.

"No, I'm afraid not. I deal with books, not
with magic."

Hilda then went on telling Babs about how she
came back and how she somehow had brought William to their own
world. "And since I got him here, I have taken him in and put him
in a room. Of his own," she added a bit snippy.

This of course caused Baba Yaga to cackle
again. "Well, that is quite an adventure you've been holding from
me, Hilda," she said with a grin. "And now you have him here, what
do you plan to do with him?"

William frowned. He was not used to be talked
about as if he was not there, or a mere piece of furniture that had
been acquired. Still he looked at Hilda, as he was also very
interested to hear her answer.

11. What to do with William?

Hilda looked at Babs, then at William, then
at her teacup, from where the goldfish looked up also, waiting for
her answer.

"You make it sound as if I wanted to get him
here," she said to Baba Yaga with a small pout, and a hint of
accusation in her voice.

The Russian witch just smiled. "I say
nothing. I ask a question and you are going to answer it. It
appears to me that William would like to know also, Hilly."

William nodded, which earnt him a mean look
from Hilda. "Careful, buster, there is enough room against the
wall," she warned him. "And you are not going to stop me. It's only
the dress, not the abilities you wear. Remember that."

William raised his hands as in defense.
"Okay, okay, no need to get excited. I have seen what can happen
when you get excited."

Baba Yaga screamed for cackling laughter. "I
love the boy," she yelled out, "if you don't want him, I'll take
him off your hands, Hilda!"

William's heart almost stopped beating. He
would prefer death than be with Hilda's best girlfriend.

The wicked witch raised her eyebrows. Then
she looked at William, as if she was examining him, seeing him for
the first time. It felt to the subject under scrutiny as if Hilda
was going over him even more thoroughly than Babs had done. "Nah,
I'll keep him for now," was her conclusion.

William's heart took heart and resumed full
responsibility for life again.

"I am teaching him to fly a broom," Hilda
giggled then. "We were out doing the rounds this morning. And he
keeps himself well on a broom." She had to give Baba Yaga the full
account of how they had scared the shit out of the shepherds, to
which the Russian witch treated William to a deafening and
bloodchilling cackle again. It did not bother Hilda one bit, as her
being a witch rendered her immune to the impact of it, contrary to
what it did to ordinaries.

After she had calmed down, Baba Yaga looked
at William. "You are probably not aware of the compliment she gave
you just now, about keeping yourself on the broom, Willaim. Take it
from me, you can't get much better from her than that."

Hilda seemed to ignore the entire remark. "So
you see, I got a bit upset and that got me a guest in the
house."

Baba Yaga nodded.

"And there is more to be upset about." Hilda
told about the disappearance of Gerdundula and the visit of a giant
Lamador in the garden there.

"Ouch. That is definitely worrying, Hilda,"
Baba Yaga agreed. "If he sends out his Grizbles like that. And you
floored one?", she asked William.

He showed his red and partly skinless
knuckles. "Yes. Still bear the medals for it."

Baba Yaga looked at Hilda. "And you let him
walk around with that? After he caught the thing?"

Hilda looked guilty. "Yes," she admitted.

"Tsk tsk tsk..."

"Alright... give me your hand," Hilda said to
William.

She did not need a wand. She murmured
something, blew over his knuckles and the skin was healed, the red
streaks were gone, as was the pain. "There. Good as new." She
stared at the hand a while longer before she let go of it. Then she
looked at the visiting witch again. "So Lamador is heavily on the
prowl. He is taking witches out, probably to boost himself. And
I'm- not very happy with that," she changed the ending of her
words.

The ugly witch made the teapot go round for
refills as she was thinking about everything that Hilda and William
had told her.

"Hmmm..." After a while: "Yeah...", combined
with some nodding of her head.

William looked at Hilda, his face all
questions. She shook her head and and gestured him to remain
silent.

Babs nodded again. "I think the solution is
quite simple, Hilly baby. You asked for help and you cast magic.
Then William came. So you got your help in that form. There must be
something he can do, or that he knows that can help you."

A true unbeliever, Hilda stared at the other
woman. "Please, Babs, go kid someone else and not me. I mean..."
She took William's hand and held it up. "Is he going to whack
Lamador in the face and decide the challenge that way for me?" She
put the man's hand on the table again, forgetting to take hers off
it. "I don't think so."

William stared at the small fine hand that
calmly rested on his as Hilda kept talking with Baba Yaga.

Babs noticed it too, but did not make a
remark about it. "I don't think that will be the way, Hilda.
There's a fine challenge for you two, before the big one. Has
Lamador already called a date and a place? No? Good, then you still
have at least three moons to figure it out. And I am serious about
that, Hilda. And that goes for you as well, William. Work on this.
It must be worth it."

"You know that I value your opinion, Babs,"
Hilda said.

"Yes. That is why I came. You're not coming
to get it, you're too bloody stubborn for that, so I thought I'd
come by and shove it up your ass. As well as have a look at your
mystery-man."

That triggered Hilda to quickly pull back her
hand. "Yeah, that's you. Curious as a witch."

Baba Yaga and Hilda laughed again. William
had seen it coming this time, and had his ears covered.

Babs then magicked up a very dusty bottle. It
was not made of glass, but of something that looked like ceramic.
The top did not have a cork, but was sealed with beeswax. "I think
this calls for a little drink," the witch announced. "Too bad that
Hilda can't take it. That is something you need to know, William,
she does not react well to stronger liquid spirits. She waters
things down, and for a reason. I hope you, as a man, can take
it?"

"William, be careful," said Hilda. There was
genuine concern in her voice, something that made him look at
her.

"Maybe I can try a little bit, Baba Yaga," he
said, and Hilda nodded. Little bit was good.

Suddenly there were three glasses, one with a
very light rose and two empty ones that did not hold their state
for long, as Baba Yaga chopped off the wax top and filled both
glasses. And to the rim.

"A little bit," William grinned, eyeing the
glass.

The witches raised their glasses. William
joined them, and they toasted. Baba Yaga threw the contents of her
glass in her mouth as if it were a sip of water. Hilda sampled her
rose and judged it watered down enough. William tried the heavy red
wine. It was thick as syrup and the smell already hit him in the
face. He tried it.

"Gods!! When I drink that, you can order my
coffin!" William got red in the face and had to put down the glass,
as the powerful wine tried to burn itself a hole through him and
into the ground.

Hilda handed him a glass of water and he
drank that, which brought instant relief to his inner world. "Babs,
that was mean."

The Russian witch giggled and waved over the
glass. "It should be better now." As William looked at her with
worry all over his face, she added: "Really. Trust me."

Just to be on the safer side, he also looked
at Hilda, who nodded this time. "Witches," he sighed.

"Yes, and we'll keep reminding you!", grinned
Babs.

"We?", Hilda whispered, frowning.

William missed that, and the glances that
went over the table, as he was tasting the wine again, with his
eyes closed. This time it was pure gold to drink. "Oh, now this is
good," William told the world, that consisted of two witches.

"I'm glad you like it, William," Baba Yaga
said. "Tell you what: you can call me Babs, and I'll call you
Willy."

"Oh no, I am not a Willy type of person,"
William shook his head.

"You'll get used to it, Willy," said the ugly
witch.

William knew there was nothing he could do to
change this. No way he could go against a witch and win. Instead he
said: "Hilda, weren't we going to eat?"

"Oh, crap, I forgot. You're right. Babs, want
to stay for a bite?"

Baba Yaga scratched her head. "Maybe I should
go. Still a good flight home, Hilly. On the other hand, flying on
an empty stomach is not that great either."

"Right, that settles it," Hilda said, "you're
staying and I'll make something real quick."

"Let me know if you need a hand," William
said as Hilda left for the kitchen.

"I think I can handle my kitchen better than
you, but you're welcome to join," she laughed as she stepped out of
view. Her head turned around the door opening. "Although you did a
good job on breakfast this morning. I have to say."

Babs looked at William. "You were in her
kitchen? To make food? Man, you got nerves."

"Less of them now," William admitted, "some
burnt out already." His reward was another glass of wine.

"Clear the table, it's coming!", Hilda yelled
from the kitchen.

This was a new approach for William. He saw
Baba Yaga quickly grab glasses and the bottle, so he saved his own
glass and some other things that lay around. And not a moment too
soon. Six large plates came sailing into the room and landed on the
table, two for each person. One had something hot on it, the other
a cold salad.

Hilda sauntered in then, with forks and
knives.

"Holy Bejeebus, you've not been in that crazy
kitchen for more than a minute," William stammered. "You give a
whole new meaning to fast food."

Hilda handed the eating utensils around and
sat down. "Sometimes you say the strangest things, William."

12. Making things work

Baba Yaga had left them, leaving the bottle
as a welcoming gift to William. She had invited them over for a
return visit, as that "might be refreshing for William, seeing the
home of another kind of witch". They had heard her cackling
laughter for quite a while as Babs had flown off.

It was late in the evening now, and they were
sitting at the large black table. Both crystal balls were there.
Hilda had her wand on the table also. They were trying to
brainstorm about what Babs had said, that their working together
had to be the key.

"I can't get it that she was so convinced
about you being the solution to my problem," Hilda said as she
sipped her water. She was not taking risks this evening. "I think
it was just a stupid coincidence that you came here."

William was not certain of what he had to
think of it. The explanation of Babs sounded logical, but logic was
something else in this world. Bring in witches and logic bails out
through the nearest window.

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