Highland Song (29 page)

"You have no right to call me names," she said in a shaking voice.

"Bloody hell. You teased me and--"

"Teased you?" she interrupted wildly. "I wasn't the one taking off your clothes and putting my hand between your legs and--"

"I wouldn't have minded your hands between my legs," Slade snarled, talking over her.

"I didn't--didn't mean to be a tease," Lainie stammered. "I don't know what--what happened."

"The hell you don't," Slade said savagely. "A thieving little tease found
herself
dangling at the end of her own rope. You thought you would tempt me and I would do your bidding just to see the rest of you. I learned my lesson once. I won't make the same mistake again."

"I'm not a tease!"

"You keep saying that, little fox. Then you keep proving yourself a liar. You wanted me. And you told only an instant ago that it had never been like this before."

"You don't understand."

"Then tell me," he challenged. "Help me understand why. Stop keeping secrets that stand between us."

Lainie closed her eyes and clutched the worn, ragged cloth against her body with fingers so tightly clenched her knuckles turned white.

"Why do men want only one thing from a woman?" she asked angrily.

"The truth?" Slade retorted. "All I've ever asked from you is the truth. Damned if I know why you won't comply. I don't think any woman can tell the truth for longer than half a second."

"And I don't think a man can look at a woman and not take what he wants then walk away without a thought to what he's done."

"You want me to marry you?"

Slade's sardonic question made Lainie step back as if he had struck her a hard blow.

Lainie opened her mouth, but no words came out.

"I want a man to care for me," Lainie finally said. "I want a man who won't hurt me."

"You're no different from any other woman," Slade said. "You want your sweet comforts and to hell with anyone's feelings. You tease until you get what you want. It won't work with this man."

"You don't understand."

"Bloody hell. What's not to understand?"

"Love. I was talking about love," she said passionately, "Not about fancy balls and tea in the afternoons. Not about trinkets that are left on a nightstand and don't mean anything. And not about marriage. Do you think I would want to marry someone who could force me anytime he wanted to?"

Hastily Lainie backed up as Slade stood and began fastening his britches with angry, abrupt motions. He cursed steadily in English then French then back to English. He was disgusted with himself and with the woman who had been Bertram's mistress who could make him ache like no other woman ever had.

As if he hadn't listened to her, Slade said, "No matter how much you tease and flaunt yourself in front of me, you won't get an offer of marriage."

“I dinna want an offer of marriage.”

Slade reached down, swept up his sword and sheathed it in its scabbard.

"Women wait for the highest bidder then sell themselves just like mistresses sell their bodies for a week or a month or until their benefactor grows tired of them and looks somewhere else," Slade said. "Women never just give themselves out of love to a man who has promised them nothing in return but
his own
love."

"Is that how it is with Josie and Stephan?" Lainie challenged. "I know that Hawke loves Callie."

Slade's mouth shifted into a cold smile. "They're the exception to the rule."

"And there can't be another one--an exception?"

"No."

Chapter Eleven

"Rise and shine, little fox," Slade crouched beside Lainie and watched her in the early morning as she woke from a deep sleep.

Lainie moaned and rolled over, pushing her hair from her face at the same time. "'Tis too early,” she sighed softly.

The weariness in her voice touched Slade. "No, it’s not. We have to put distance between us and this place." Slade looked over his shoulder, feeling the hairs on the back of his neck curl. "Come on," he held out his hand to Lainie.

"Have it your way," she took his hand and let him pull her to her feet. He offered water and bread. She ate and drank then mounted her horse without saying anything more.

Before the sun peeped over the rugged terrain and the tops of the trees, turning darkness to light, Slade and Lainie were on the trail. They'd been riding for what seemed like hours when the sun finally cast its first golden spires of light upon the hills. Slade studied the landscape, never turning to look at Lainie or speak to her. Lainie didn't care this morning even though she'd become used to the easy banter of words between them.

She didn't have anything to say to the frustrating man. So she rode in silence and watched him, wondering how she had so easily forgotten the lessons Bertram had taught her about men.

What a man wanted he took. But unlike Bertram, Slade stopped when she said no.

By the time the sun hit its zenith, she was bored silly and wishing she hadn't let the kiss last night rip all sense from her head. She was too stubborn to say anything to the man who had burned her to the core then set her aside as if she were nothing more than the whore he thought she was.

She couldn't stand the silence any longer. She didn't care if he yelled at her and called her names beneath his breath. She needed a distraction. "Are you going to ride all the way to the MacPherson castle without saying another word to me?" she asked sweetly, smiling at him as if there was nothing wrong all the while trying to hide the wistfulness in her voice.

If Slade heard--and she was sure he had--he didn't bother to look in her direction. He just kept riding, stopping every so often to hold his spyglass up and peer into the distance.

"I've a mind to turn around and go the other way." Lainie said, wondering if that would get some kind of reaction from him. "I don't understand why you're so angry with me."

"Not a wise move. But go ahead. You'll find yourself in Bertram's bed. Is that what you want?" Slade asked with just as much sugar in his voice as she had used in hers.

Lainie shivered at the thought. He knew how to goad her with her own words. Another mile passed with no change except that Slade stopped long enough to offer her a bite to eat and water to drink. Then he put the items away and urged Baby forward.

She couldn't get his words from her head. What did he know that she didn't? Did he know if Jericho was close? And was he hiding the fact from her? Surely, he must know she wouldn't ride to Edinburgh if given the chance to decide for herself. Surely, he must know she would never go to Bertram.

She wanted Slade to talk to her, but most of all she wanted him to listen long and hard enough that he would understand who she was. She wanted him to realize she had never given herself to Bertram willingly. His silence this morning bothered her more deeply than she thought possible.

"Do you know where we're going or better than that do you know where we are?" Lainie asked, still trying for conversation that was not forthcoming.

Slade answered with a shrug of his broad shoulders and kept riding.

Obtuse man, she thought. She inhaled a long, ragged breath and tried to ride a little faster so she could bring her horse beside him. "Are you sulking?"

"No need to worry, little fox. I'm just looking for a way around that mountain. I don't want to go over and we can't go through."

Lainie looked beyond Slade's finger and saw nothing but more tiny falls of water, rushing downward in a never-ending stream. The path veered to the left and she could see nothing except high cliffs made of solid rock.

"I'm not a mountain goat," she muttered.

"The hair on the nape of my neck is standing on end," Slade said. "It's always a bad sign. I'm not ignoring you. I'm just concentrating on keeping us alive."

Lainie shivered. She was thankful Slade was finally speaking to her. "Maybe I didn't get all the soap off last night."

For the first time Slade turned and looked at her with glittering green eyes. "Are you offering to try again?"

"Perhaps I'd use the dirk in a different manner this time," Lainie said sweetly. "Dinna fash yourself, Englishman. I still need you to get me where I'm going, and it's not Edinburgh."

"Wait here," he said. "I'm going to see if there are any tracks heading into that narrow slit up ahead. If anything happens to me, turn and run for Stephan's estate. He'll keep you safe and see that you get wherever you want to go."

"Even MacPherson land?" she queried softly. The hope in her voice could not be denied.

"Even MacPherson land," he repeated, his dark eyes and brooding expression frightening her. “For some reason I don’t understand, he liked you.”

This wasn't the first time Slade had left Lainie alone in order to investigate, but it was the first time he had so emphatically warned of danger. She watched anxiously while he quartered back and forth on either side of the most obvious routes into the narrow slit of cliff in front of them. She prayed he returned, because she had no idea as to where she was. And she didn't think she could find her way back to Stephan and Josie's home.

Finally, Slade signaled Lainie forward. While she brought the packhorses up, he pulled his bow from behind his back and notched an arrow, making sure all of his arrows were in easy reach. Get your dirk out," he told her. It won't do you a lot of good unless they get past me. But--" he left off. She shuddered knowing full well what might happen if Jericho's men got by Slade.

Lainie watched the preparations with her heart in her throat. She told herself she wasn't afraid to die. She'd cheated death before. But she was afraid. Then she realized that unless she killed herself, Jericho wasn't going to kill her. He'd rape her, and he'd let his men rape her, then he'd take her to Bertram.

She knew if she was brought back to Bertram, she’d fight him. Rape frightened her more than death, but she knew she could live through anything now. And she knew somehow she’d find a way to chase the coldness from her soul.

A shiver snaked down her spine. "Isn't there anything else we can do?"

Slade's mouth turned up at one corner, the smile barely perceptible. "I'll tell you when you need to be frightened. This is just a precaution. I don't like being caught unprepared."

"I don't like to be told how I should feel," Lainie said. She pushed wisps of hair from her eyes. Nay, she didn't want anyone to tell her she didn't need to be terrified when all the elements cried out to her that terror was the only emotion that was relevant right now.

"That passage ahead of us is so narrow you can't swing a sword," Slade said as if he were planning his strategy.

"Can our horses get through?"

"Yes," Slade said calmly.

"Then I'm ready," she said determination pressing in on her.

Lainie slipped her hood off, tucked up wisps of hair, and looked everywhere but at Slade's ice green eyes. She didn't want him to know how terrified and vulnerable she felt.

She meant to live through this.

"Is there anything I can do besides grip my dirk and close my eyes," she asked after a moment.

"You can duck," he told her "and use that dirk you have if anyone gets close to you. I wouldn't advise closing your eyes." His smile was grim. "And whatever you do, don't worry about me. I’ll be fine."

Lainie nodded, her heart a huge lump in her throat, and her hands shaking so hard she didn't think she could hang on to her dirk.

"Are your reins still tied together?" Slade asked.

She nodded again. "Put the packhorses between us," he said. "They'll follow you wherever you go."

Lainie whirled toward him. "Slade?" she questioned, panic catching each breath of air she tried to suck inside.

"Don't be afraid. I don't like seeing those shadows in your eyes. Bloody hell, but if I had the chance right now, I'd pull you into my arms and reassure you," he paused in thought. "But then you might not like that."

"Reassurance would be a lie, wouldn't it? Don't lie to me, Slade. Whatever happens here,
don't
lie to me."

He nodded. "The way ahead is dangerous. My instincts are rarely wrong. We both need to be wary and watch every shadow."

“There are a lot of shadows,” she murmured.

"There are a lot of tracks," Slade said. "Hard to tell if they are friend or foe. Jericho would cover his tracks better. Two brothers chasing after their sister might not be so wary. Either way--"

"I won't let Hawke or Ian hurt you. If it's them, they just have my safety in mind. But I don't think it is. I let them know they weren't to come after me. What I'd really like to do right now is turn around and find another route."

"Any other way would take weeks longer and be three times as dangerous. This is the only route we won't find English sentries guarding the road. We have to go through the slit in that cliff. And--I don't believe your brothers would heed your words if they thought you were in trouble. By now news of the bounty on your head should be all over Scotland."