Highland Healer (33 page)

“Get away from me, Edward, and never touch me again!”

Toran’s skin broke out in goosebumps. He froze where he stood, watching Aileana work her will on the bigger, stronger man. Edward’s face took on a blankness that Toran recognized. He recalled wearing that slack expression on his face a time or two. The power of her order shimmered in the air around her. A ripple of chill ran down Toran’s back. Oh, aye, he kenned this trick of hers. And now he kenned how she’d kept herself untouched both with Colbridge’s army, and with Toran. And how she’d escaped the Aerie to go to Ranald. She’d used this power of hers to compel men to obey her. She’d used it on him—more than once, of that he had no doubt. Donal had been right to fear her Talents. Healing was not all she could do. There was more to his wife than it seemed. Much more.

Toran slipped back into the shadows and watched as Edward stood and moved back to his seat by the fire. He looked puzzled, and the glance he sent Aileana’s way as she resettled herself for sleep was deeply troubled and confused.

Aileana, on the other hand, looked supremely calm and confident as she muttered, “No rabbit is worth this.” Toran recognized that expression on her face as well. No wonder she had shown little fear in the camp, or even when Toran kidnapped her. Why had she allowed him to take her? She could have stopped him at any time. She could have ordered him to let her go and returned to the camp. Had she then truly wanted to get away from Colbridge’s army?

Edward was back to tossing twigs into the fire. A sly smile lifted the corner of Toran’s mouth. He suspected that Edward had no idea what had just happened, or even that he had tried to claim his “reward” from Aileana and been easily repulsed.

Having seen her powers at work, Toran realized that not only had Donal been right to suspect her, but Toran now had a decision to make. Should he bring her back to the Aerie? Or let her go on her way? He might be risking his clan, his home, everything he had fought Colbridge to save. But he would be risking Aileana, too. He loved her and had fought Colbridge to save her.

Should he wake her now, and carry her home with him? Or, now that he’d found her, should he follow for another day and see what other talents she displayed? He had never been more torn by a decision he had to make. But now that he understood more of her powers, his feelings for her were tempered with caution. He tried to focus on the good she had done, the men she had saved. But Donal’s admonitions were also in his thoughts. Bringing her home right now was too great a risk, he decided. He’d stay close by to make sure she came to no harm, and to make sure she harmed no one else. Could he leave her if she showed she had more dangerous talents? Toran wanted to cry out his frustration. Instead, he went back to Banner and settled down for the night.

****

The snow had stopped during the night. They’d set out at first light, the warm meat of their dinner a fond memory in Aileana’s belly, and with nothing to replace it. But their path seemed to trend more downhill than up, so Aileana allowed herself to hope they might be headed in the right direction after all, coming down out of the mountains. Her only regret was that she was leaving Toran and the life they might have had together farther and farther behind.

She missed Toran. As much as she hated to admit it, even to herself, she knew he had been right about Ranald. He’d been trying to protect her, to save her life when she was too distraught to care about her own safety. He’d been gentle with her in his anger, comforting to her even in his fear for her life. And had acted nobly against his own wishes when she’d demanded that he honor his first promise to her. She’d never forget the stricken look on his face as she turned away from him. She could sense his inner battle as she walked away. There was no mistaking how much he wanted to come after her, how he’d fought to allow her the freedom she demanded—the freedom he’d promised, even as she broke her promise to him.

But if she returned to him of her own free will, she was still free, was she not?

They were days away from the glen below the Aerie. If she turned back now, could she find it? Would she recognize any of the paths they’d taken? There had been trees and more trees. And occasionally wolves howling in the night. She’d be alone—truly alone. No food. No shelter. She’d be completely vulnerable to any storm, any predator, four-legged or two. But was that any worse than the danger she knew she faced if she continued on with these men?

Aileana slowed her pace while she debated, allowing the other four to get well ahead of her. It was risky either way. She had only herself to blame for being here and for letting her anger and despair drive her away. Her fault for not listening to the man who loved her.

But would Toran welcome her back? That thought stopped her in her tracks. What if he would not? Or could not? His pride had to be wounded. The woman he’d wanted had turned her back on him in his moment of triumph. He’d bested Colbridge and broken up the army bent on destroying his clan and home. Would he lose the respect of his people if he took her back? She’d treated him worse than Coira ever had. She’d lied to him, then she’d told him she hated him and walked away from him. She’d broken the vow she’d made at their handfasting. She wouldn’t blame him for barring the Aerie’s gates against her.

No, he wouldn’t welcome her back.

She started walking again, head down, wrapped in misery. She might as well take her chances with the four ahead of her. She’d had a chance at a home, at a man who loved her, at a family, and she’d thrown it all away.

The only path left to her went southward. Perhaps there she could find someone who would accept her as she was. Talented. Flawed. Heartbroken.

“Aileana!”

The voice barely penetrated the veil of misery she’d drawn around herself.

“Where are you going? This way!”

That made her look up. With a start, she realized that Galen was calling from behind her. Somehow she had turned around and was retracing her steps back to the Aerie.

“Aileana!”

Slowly, she looked around her. The sun rising over the shoulder of a mountain spilled a bright gold arrow across the snowy landscape, pointing back the way she had come. She was no seer and really didn’t believe in signs, but this was too compelling to ignore.

Turning to face her traveling companions, who were now far below her, well down the path, she waved. “Go on without me. I’ve decided to go back. I left something there that I can’t live without.”

Galen started in her direction and she waved him off. “Go on. I’ll be fine.”

“You’ll be alone. You won’t survive it.”

“Yes, I will. Safe journey, Galen.” The other three were staring at her as if she’d lost her mind. Perhaps she had. Or perhaps she’d finally found it for the first time since Ranald’s death. With a wave, she turned on her heel and started back up the path, a smile on her face for the first time in days.

Chapter Twenty

Toran couldn’t believe what his eyes beheld. Aileana had turned around. She’d bidden goodbye to her fellow healers and started back up the path she’d just trodden. She was headed home! To the Aerie. To him…or where she thought he was. And her expression, remorse and stoic stillness, had been replaced by a smile that refused to leave her. She was alone in a strange place, her only kin dead, the man she loved far ahead of her for all she knew, and all hope of the home she might have had there lost. And yet, she looked happy with her decision. She’d told Galen that’s she’d left something behind that she couldn’t live without.

Him? Toran swore he would pray forever to any deities who could make that wish come true.

He flicked the reins. Banner carried him out of the cover of the trees. Toran had been following Aileana at a distance since they started down the trail this morning, but now that she’d turned back, he was ahead of her.

If she looked up the hill—when she looked up—she would see him. How would she react? With joy? Relief? Or anger? He forced himself to sit quietly in the saddle and wait for her notice. He wouldn’t startle her by riding to her and sweeping her up into his arms, though he longed to do just that.

No, he had to let her come to him. That was the only way he’d be sure that the woman who had walked away from him really did want to walk back into his arms.

He’d deal with her unexpected abilities another time. His Aileana would not harm him. He kenned that as clearly as he kenned that his heart was beginning to pound its way out of his chest as he watched her, waiting for her to see him. After he’d given it more consideration last night, he’d realized that the compulsions she’d laid on him had always been for her protection, or to save another person. She had never betrayed him or his clan. Perhaps Donal had been right to be cautious, but not to dismiss her out of hand.

Toran would bring her home, if she still wanted a home with him.

It was what he wanted, almost more than he could stand…to have her with him day and night, for the rest of his life. Almost, he flicked Banner’s reins to start forward. Almost, he called out to her. But no. He held his peace, forcing himself to trust her, to allow her to decide her fate, and his.

What if she turned away from him? That was unthinkable. He could not let her leave him again. He would convince her, somehow. His words would not fail him today.

At that moment, Aileana saw him. There was no mistaking her surprise. She froze mid-step and stared for the space of several heartbeats. Her smile fled her face, replaced by a frown of doubt, even fear. Toran’s heart sank to see her turmoil written on her face. Then she took a step, and another. Not back toward her traveling companions. Not off into the woods. Toward him. Step by deliberate step. Her gaze never left him. Her eyes blazed in her face. Ah, angry then. He could deal with that.

“Have you been following me all this time?” she shouted.

“Nay. I only just found ye…”

“You haven’t been riding in comfort while I walk my feet off, wondering where the next bit of food is going to come from?”

“I would never do that to ye, Aileana.”

“Then why are you here?”

“I’ve been searching for ye since ye left the camp. I’m here to bring ye home, lass.”

At that, a glimmer of tears shone in her eyes. “Have you?”

“Ye ken I never wanted ye to go.”

“Aye.”

“Ye ken I am a determined man.”

“Oh! Aye.”

“Ye ken that I want ye and love ye, wife, do ye no’?”

That brought the smile back to her face and Toran’s heart lifted along with the corners of her sweet mouth.

“There’s never been a doubt in my mind.”

Toran dropped the reins and leaned over Banner’s neck. “Then why did ye go?”

Aileana pursed her lips, then shrugged. “I was upset. I was wrong. I should never have left.”

“Ye were wrong?”

“Aye. And you were right. Is that what you want to hear? Is that why you’re making me stand here instead of pulling me up onto that great big horse and carrying me home?”

“Nay, lass. I only wish to be sure that’s what ye want.”

“I do, Toran.”

He reached down for her hand and pulled her easily in front of him, wrapping his arms around her and holding her as tightly as he could without crushing the breath from her chest. “So do I, Aileana. So do I.”

Toran picked up the reins and turned Banner around. “We’ve a day’s hard ride ahead of us,” he told her, “but nightfall will see us inside the walls of the Aerie. Safe and warm.”

“And fed?”

“Aye. And loved.”

“That’s good then,” Aileana said and relaxed into his embrace. Toran kicked Banner into a gallop. With any luck, they’d beat the sunset home.

****

Shouts went up as the guards on the Aerie’s main gate spotted the Lathan riding up the ridge. Toran was glad to see the gates of home. It had been a long ride. Aileana slept in his arms for most of it, and whenever she awoke, she had little to say. He supposed she was exhausted from her journey. They’d stopped several times for necessities and to finish the last of his trail food, which allowed Banner some respite. Aileana had bestirred herself enough to stroke the big warhorse’s nose, a liberty that Banner usually allowed only Toran, then she’d withdrawn back into herself. At the shouting, she woke from the latest doze, which had lasted for several hours, and straightened up within the circle of Toran’s arms.

“We’re home, lass. Time to get some food into ye.”

“Food?” Aileana’s sleepily mumbled response sounded hopeful. Toran had to grin.

“Aye. All ye want. Then a bath, then back to bed with ye. The last few days have been hard for both of us.”

“Harder for me,” Aileana muttered, clearly miffed. “I had to walk.”

“And whose fault was that?” Toran couldn’t resist taunting. Aileana was saved from responding by the din that rose within the gates.

With a nod to the men holding wide the heavy oaken doors, they passed through and kept going until they reached the inner bailey. Stable boys ran to take Banner’s lead. Toran spotted Jamie among those waiting for them, and gestured him over.

“Take Aileana,” Toran told him. “Her feet are sore. And I want Senga take a look at her.”

“Aye,” Jamie answered with a wink at Aileana as Toran handed her into his arms.

“You’re looking well,” she told Jamie.

“Better, now that ye’re returned, Healer,” Jamie told her with a smile. “Come, let’s get ye inside.”

“Wait! Just hold on, ye two.” Senga’s command pierced the babble of voices greeting Toran as he dismounted. Her slight frame was headed straight for him and he had the whimsical thought, just for a moment, that she would knock him over, so great was her haste. Then she stopped in front of him, hands on hips, glaring up.

“Greetings, Healer.”

“Greetings, my left foot. ’Tis about time ye brought her home,” she scolded. Toran only raised an eyebrow in response. Then she turned on Jamie. “Set her down. Ailith near to cut off a finger in the kitchen when the news came that ye were on the path to the gates. I need Aileana’s help. I wrapped the wound, but I don’t know if I can stand the weepin’ and the wailin’ for much longer.”

“I’d better help her,” Aileana said, nudging Jamie’s shoulder.