Hero: A Bad Boy Mafia Romance (10 page)

Even if the thought of her deciding to turn around and leave had my gut clenching - and not because a connection to Xero would be walking out of the door.

“Okay.”

She came forward and tugged my arms back around her, relaxing into me as she relented. Those bright eyes still searched mine for understanding, but there was heat beyond the care and concern there now, and as I gave her a small smile, the last of my tension left. My hand curled around her head and as I brought her lips to mine, she pressed close. The urgency and need between us was immediate, and I was struck by how quickly that deep kiss affected me.

My hand shifted down her back, landing on her ass and admiring the soft curves there as I found everything I needed in her mouth.

“Come on.”

She pulled back a little and I frowned, the idea of anything else an unwelcome distraction. The spark was back in her eyes as she gave me a brief grin.

“We haven’t explored the bathroom properly yet, and I have a feeling you could use it.”

Now
that
had my attention.

As she turned, I hesitated for just a moment and wondered whether we were getting in too deep. I didn’t like the direction this evening had taken, the way I’d wanted Lottie’s presence after the day I’d had, or how much I knew it would have hurt if she had left. But I couldn’t cut it short, even if I knew it was starting to become a damn bad idea. Outside these walls, she was forbidden - and this evening had shown me just how fragile those walls were.

Don’t I deserve a few moments of peace?

I forced all of that aside and followed as she tugged on my arm, focusing instead on the way her ass shifted in front of me and the heat and promise she offered as she started to run the shower.

Steam billowed around us by the time we finally lost the clothes and I followed her into the large, luxurious shower, letting the jets engulf us as our mouths and bodies met.

Feeling her melt under my touch, I finally put the day behind me and gave into the idea of heat and pleasure cleansing my body and washing away the blood.

Lottie pushed me back against the moist tiles of the shower, our mouths locked together with a heat that rivalled the water rushing over us. I pulled her forward, my strong hands nestling her small body between my thighs, watching as her sparkling eyes reflected the same pounding lust I felt.

“Ohh god, Jason…”

I caught her moan with my mouth, nipping and nibbling at her lips while my hands caressed and explored that open, willing body. Slick with moisture and heat, there was nothing better than this small piece of heaven we were making for each other.

It was insanity – locked away in a hotel room, abusing our already clandestine meeting. Taking the girl another gang boss had claimed for himself. But feeling her body on mine, inhaling her feminine scent and seeing the passion in her eyes…that felt so fucking good, I’d damn the consequences to hell.

I pulled her in harder, rough now as our need took over, letting her feel my thickness pulsing oh-so-close to her sweet entrance. She gasped and pressed against me, nails digging into my shoulders as she caught me for balance and looked up, eyes sparking with light.

I flexed my hips as she clung there, rubbing up and down her soft core with a sweet friction that she shuddered against, damn near destroying my own control. My head trailed down her neck, tongue dancing across her collarbone until I reached her breasts and started lavishing them with my attention, hands and mouth working her until she writhed against me.

Lottie was so damn expressive like this – never holding anything back. As open and honest with her desire as she was about any other feeling she had. It got under my skin and stayed there, making every one of these moments feel real and genuine.

Even if we couldn’t let them to be. Outside this luxurious room, we lived different lives. Violent lives – deadly and dangerous, with so much more risk from these brief moments of lust.

I’d flirted with danger and death all my life, but this was different. We both knew that if anyone found out, gang warfare could rip the city apart. Destroy us both, our goals and ambitions in tatters.

And I didn’t fucking care.

Here, in this shower, in this hotel room – all that mattered was the hard breathing of the woman in front of me. The way the water droplets sparkled in her hair. The touches and kisses that echoed my own desperate passion.

Lottie had offered me a brief respite from that crazy life, and I’d be damned if I was going to refuse. Whatever happened out there, we needed this. We needed each other.

With that thought driving me on, I raised a hand to grab hers, my body shifting to push her back against the wall. A thrill ran through me as I held her easily, surrounding her small frame with my hard, demanding body.

“Wait.” Lottie’s voice was determined, if breathy, as I nipped at her neck and felt her pulse fluttering under me.

Waiting was the last thing on my mind and I pressed against her, savouring the feel of her soft body moulding into mine.

She moaned, but pushed back against me, reaching out of that closed space between us to grab the soap on the side. My eyes followed her, questioning, until she stepped back against the wall, one hand lightly running down my chest. I glanced down at the remnants of dried blood there and frowned as those bright eyes looked up at me.

Knowing what she was seeing – what it said about me – disturbed me, and with the echoes of earlier violence flooding through my mind, I pulled back.

“Lottie…”

“I want to.”

That determined gaze didn’t relent. Lottie had never shrunk from what I was. She might hate the things I did and the place I held in the Italian mafia, but she didn’t fool herself about it. She looked at me and wanted to make it better anyway. Wash it away.

My breath caught as soap-slick hands started to circle my hard pecs, down to my abs, and the delicate touch made me want to groan. Her voice murmured against me as her lips touched my neck, my collarbone, and then finally down to my now-clean chest.

“That has no place here. This is our world. Our place, Jason.”

The water beat down around us, and under the echo of its spray her words rang true. Blood and death and violence didn’t belong here. This was a place for our pleasure and passion.

I let her wash away the ugliness of the outside world – of everything we came from – and as that disappeared, my eyes sparked with sudden heat, a dangerous smile spreading over my face.

Not giving her another moment, I took both wrists in one hand and forced them up against the wall. She gasped, but her body melted against me and I positioned myself, my hard cock pressing against her willing body as desire overtook me. One leg came up and curled around my ass, her centre pressing against me as she moaned, ready and waiting.

With a groan, I gave her what she wanted – dropping her hands to lift her up and onto me, her legs coming fully around me now as she rested on my large hands. One slow movement and I was inside her, that breathy mouth against my cheek and arms coming around my neck to clutch tightly.

I groaned at her tight pussy around me, my cock throbbing as I thrust hard and felt that tightness expand and take me. The force of it pushed me forward, trapping her between the wall and my body as my hips worked hard, thrusting with all the pent up lust and need riding through me.

“Oh, fuck Jason…”

Her cries spurred me on, and my mouth joined hers as her breathing became harsher and more desperate, our tongues sparring with each other while I revelled in the sweet softness of her body.

Everything in my life was hard, harsh and deadly – except this naïve, forbidden girl in front of me. And I was fast becoming addicted to her.

Lottie’s hands clawed at my shoulders, her body shuddering against me, and I could tell she was close. Driven by the urgent lust and illicit pleasure that was tearing at any self-control I had left.

I slammed forward, any delicacy abandoned in favor of wild need, roughly fucking her against the wall while she spasmed and gasped, constant cries to my harsh grunts. Hot lust surged forth, my whole body starting to tense as her tight pussy took everything I gave it.

Within moments, we both flew over that sharp edge, her voice ringing in my ears as she cried my name and desperate lust overtaking us, I stopped caring about what we were doing or what this meant.

Fuck them all.

It was just us. Lottie and I.

In this fleeting world we made for each other.

Chapter Eleven

Lottie

Taking a deep breath, I grasped the wooden lattice that made its way down the side of our house, avoiding the beginnings of ivy my mother had planted and taking the route that had become familiar over the past few weeks: a hand here, a foot there, grab the ledge and then swing myself up and over until I was right in front of my window.

I hadn’t done this sneaking-out-of-the-house thing since I was a teenager - and considering my parents’ trust, I probably hadn’t even needed to do it then - but this was something I just didn’t want them knowing about. When I went straight from Jorge’s gang to Jason, that was one thing, but if I was here I tried to make sure they didn’t notice when I left or returned.

I wanted them as far away as possible from what I was doing.

I pushed at the window, reaching around and flicking the latch through the small space I’d set up when I left earlier. The sharp gasp from within froze me, my eyes darting about and trying to penetrate through the reflective window as every possible scenario instantly flashed through my mind.

The shadowed figure sitting on my bed shifted, then rose, and even in the darkness I recognized Leah.  The thunder of my heartbeat settled down, and I levered myself up and through, coming down into a crouch on top of the desk there.

“Lottie?”

The voice was quiet, tentative, even though she must know it was me.

I paused a moment, not quite sure what to make of this, before flicking on the light. We both winced as our eyes adjusted, but I recovered quicker.

“Leah, are you okay?”

There was usually only one reason she came into my room at night - but she didn’t seem upset. Either from night terrors or finding that her sister was gone.

She nodded and stepped into my arms as I jumped lightly from the desk.

“Yeah.”

She looked up at me, silent a moment, and I could see the unspoken questions in her eyes. She didn’t ask - it saddened me, but she knew better than that.

“I was working late and came in because I wanted to talk to you about something, then…”

Her gaze flicked to the bed.

“I wanted to make sure you were alright.”

The smile crept up my mouth, and warmth filled me again. The time I spent with Jason got under my skin and left me feeling on top of the world, but it was my family’s genuine care that always reminded me how lucky I was.

“Thanks for waiting up for me, Leah, but I’m fine - really, I’m sorry if you were worried.”

She gave me a considering look before nodding.

“I wasn’t, not really. Maybe a little curious…”

To my disbelief, the sparkle in her eyes made something inside me flutter, and I felt a flush start to spread across my cheeks.

That wasn’t me. I didn’t honest-to-god
blush.

She caught on immediately, grin widening as those knowing eyes caught mine. I coughed, embarrassed at how ridiculous I was being, before giving her a stern look.

“There’s nothing to be curious about.”

That
only made her laugh, mind already leaping to its own conclusions, but in truth I didn’t really mind - better to have her thinking pleasant things about my nighttime adventures than what she usually had to deal with.

I couldn’t believe that
I
was reacting this way too - as if I’d been caught in some midnight tryst. Sure, these meets were small part business and mostly all-over-each-other pleasure, but the
purpose
had never been the pleasure.

And I wasn’t really the kind of girl to go all silly about it. But somehow, back in this room where I’d spilled more late-night romantic secrets with Leah than I could count, it was hard to think about where I’d just been and see anything other than Jason’s glistening body in the shower. That fierce expression as he’d pressed me against the wall, the soap-slick hands that had touched every part of me.

The satisfying ache at my core spasmed again at the thought, and I had to fight not to squirm and embarrass myself completely. I already wanted to be back with him, lost in that hotel room together - and I was struggling to focus on anything else. I usually spent the nights after our meetings getting my head back into the rest of the world and leaving Jason behind - and Leah had found me far too soon for that to have happened.

“Of course not.”

My mouth quirked at the sarcastic tone of her voice, but I took her arm and moved us over to the bed, taking the words at face value.

“So what did
you
want to talk about?”

She took a moment to look me over, amused interest having replaced the initial hesitation when I’d come in - but she let us drop the subject, and as her mind refocused, that hesitation returned.

“I want to get out of here, Lottie. I know it’s not Mom and Dad’s dream - or yours - but we should have moved out of this dump years ago. I’m thinking of applying to some schools out of town.”

Her fingers worried at the edge of my bedspread and she glanced at me uncertainly. My heart caught in my throat and I pulled her closer to me.

“I’m sorry, love…”

I knew she’d never been happy here, but I’d never thought that she was so at odds with with what we were trying to do.

“No, don’t be. There’s nothing to be sorry about - I just…wanted to know what you thought about me leaving.”

I chewed the inside of my cheek as I paused, trying to think it through. It made sense - it was even something I might have suggested for her - but…it wasn’t quite as easy as deciding to do it.

“I think it’s a good idea, Leah, if that’s what you want. But I’m not sure whether we’d be able to afford—”

“I’ve looked into scholarships.”

Her face lit as she interrupted, obvious passion coming into her eyes.

“There aren’t many that would work, but I’ve got a few options. And I’ve got the scores for it - I think I can do it. I just don’t know what Mom and Dad will think.”

I squeezed her again, unable to help the brief burst of pride.

“Of course, Leah, sometimes I forget all that - how bright you are. You should go for it then. Don’t worry about Mom and Dad - they’ve never expected us to follow their plans, you know. They’ll be thrilled.”

“But you—”

“Had to fight tooth and nail to do half of it. You remember how hard Dad fought to keep me out of the army?”

That startled a laugh out of her, and she covered her mouth even as her eyes crinkled. Of course she remembered - those fights had lasted a long time. All I’d ever wanted was to be like him, and all he’d ever wanted was to keep those horrors away from me.

You were a hero, fighting for everything you believe in - to protect your country - why can’t I do the same?!

No way, Lottie. All I ever saw and did was pain and death. Whatever the cause, it’s not worth that. You want to know who the real heroes were? Those that came along afterward and fixed those messes, put everyone back together. Those that helped, instead of harming. The best thing I ever did was teach a bunch of Afghani kids to read. And after seventeen years of service? That’s what I’m proud of.

“I’m glad he did, you know.”

I smiled reluctantly at my sister’s voice, shaking my head at the memory.

“Me too. He was right, as much as it pains me to admit it.”

She gave me a sidelong glance.

“Maybe…if he was right about that, he’s right now, too?”

I bit my lip to stop the instinctive defensive answer. Leah didn’t bring this up often - far less than my parents. And only because she really cared. I shook my head as I responded, sighing.

“He isn’t, Leah. I need to do…this. I know it’s hard to see now, but things really can change.”

I’d already heard some of what Jason and Valentini were doing - both from Jason, and through Jorge. For the first time, I felt like there was something real behind my words. I was making a difference. And seeing that, all the risk in the world was worth it.

I could see Leah trying hard not to argue with me - I knew she didn’t think it was my responsibility, but it was just something we weren’t going to agree with each other on. Instead, I squeezed her tight and turned the conversation back to more pleasant things.

“I think your plan sounds great, Leah - you should tell Mom and Dad. They’ll help, I promise. I can’t wait to see the places you choose.”

She smiled at my supportive grin and hugged me back.

“Okay, well I’ll see whether I can make some progress first. Thanks for listening, though.”

We stood up and I smiled.

“Always, baby sister.”

She turned to go, then hesitated a moment.

“You know, whatever you’re doing when you sneak out that window - I think it’s good for you. It’s been great to see you happy, relaxed for once. Smiling more. I just don’t want all the other stuff you’re involved in to ruin that, Lottie. You deserve to be happy yourself.”

I blinked, shocked at the words, but she didn’t give me a chance to respond as she slipped out. Leah had very obviously come to her own conclusions about what was going on, and I had no idea what she’d think if she realized it was all wrapped up together.

I also had no idea I was doing half the things she said. I’d felt happier recently, sure, lighter and freer with Jason’s support behind me, and the passion we shared. I knew having someone else in on my secrets had eased the constant tension, but until she put it like that, I hadn’t realized…just how much it had affected me.

I changed and slipped into bed, my mind circling through it again and again. Jason
was
making me happy - I hadn’t thought about more than our limited meetings, and hadn’t considered what else it might mean. I hadn’t wanted to.

But there was no denying how much my heart raced in the build up to seeing him, or that it had fast become the best time of my week. Maybe that was why I’d pushed tonight - for the first time - wanting to know more. To understand. I saw so much of who he was now, but it just didn’t fit with everything else I knew of him.

He wasn’t the man he pretended to be - I just couldn’t work out why the hell he’d given up on everything good I saw in those blissful, intimate moments.

My mind drifted back to only an hour ago as I closed my eyes, warmth filling me again at the thought. After we’d spent far too long in the shower, exploring each other with our cries echoing through the steam and water, we’d spent some time just lying together in the large king-sized bed. He’d held me for the first time, arms clasped protectively around my body and warmth pressed against my back.

I wasn’t sure what had led to that - usually, we were careful not to spend too long - but part of me felt it was a silent apology for the way he’d snapped at me before. That, or he wanted the gentle soothing as much as I did, the moment of calm before we went back to the world outside.

I could still feel him now and wished that he was here around me as I drifted off to sleep, touched by the small indication that he cared more than he said.