Heritage and Exile (17 page)

Linnell is a pretty child, with soft bronze-brown hair and blue eyes framed in lashes so long and dark they looked unreal. She was, I thought, considerably prettier than her kinswoman Callina, who had looked so severe and stern at Council yesterday.

The Aillard Domain is the only one in which
laran
and Council-right pass not in the male line, but in the female; males are not allowed to hold full Domain rights in Council. The last
comynara
in the direct line had been Cleindori, the last of the Keepers trained completely in the old, cloistered virginal tradition. While still quite young, she had left the tower, rebelled against the old superstitions surrounding the matrix circles and especially the Keepers and had, in defiance of tradition and belief, taken a consort and borne him a child while continuing to use the powers she had been taught. She had been horribly murdered by fanatics who thought a Keeper's virginity was more important than her competence or her powers. But she had broken the ancient mold, defied the superstitions and created a new scientific approach to what is now called matrix mechanics. For years her very name had been abhorred as a renegade. Now her memory was revered by every psi technician on Darkover.

But she had left no daughters. The old Aillard line had finally died out and Callina Lindir-Aillard, a distant kinswoman of my father's and of the male head of the Aillard domain, had been chosen
comynara,
as nearest female successor. Linnell had come to Armida for my father to foster and had been brought up as my sister.

Linnell was an expert dancer, and I enjoyed dancing with her. I have little interest in feminine fripperies, but Linnell had taught me the courtesies of such things, so I took polite notice of her gown and ornaments. When the dance came to an end, I led Linnell to the sidelines and asked her if she thought I should ask Callina to dance; Callina, too, by Comyn custom for unwed women, was restricted to dancing with kinsmen except at masked balls.

“I don't know if Callina cares to dance,” Linnell said, “she's very shy. But you should ask her. I'm sure she'll tell you if she'd rather not. Oh, there is Javanne Hastur! Every time I've seen her in the last nine years, it seems, she's been pregnant. But she's actually pretty, isn't she?”

Javanne was dancing with Gabriel. She had a high color in her cheeks and looked as if she were enjoying herself. I suppose that any young matron would be happy, after four closely spaced pregnancies, to be in society again. Javanne was very tall and excessively thin, a dark girl in an elaborate green-and-golden gown. I did not think her pretty, but she was undeniably handsome.

I conducted Linnell to Callina, but before I could speak to her, my father approached me.

“Come along, Lew,” he said, in a tone I had learned to regard, however politely phrased, as a command. “You should pay your respects to Javanne.”

I stared. Javanne? She had never liked me, even when we were going to children's parties. Once we had both been whipped impartially for getting into a kicking-and-scratching fight, at seven or so, and later, when we were about eleven, she rudely refused to dance with me, saying I stepped on her feet. I probably did, but I had already been telepath enough to know that was not her reason. “Father,” I said patiently, “I'm quite sure Lady Javanne can dispense with any compliments from me.” Had he quite lost his wits?

“And Lew promised to dance with me again,” Linnell said sulkily. Father patted her cheek and assured her there would be time enough for that, with a look at me which admitted no further delay unless I wanted to defy him openly and make a scene.

Javanne was standing in a little cluster of younger women, sipping a glass of wine. My father's voice seemed more deliberate than usual, as he presented me.

“I wish you a joyous Festival, kinsman,” she said with a courteous bow. Kinsman! Well, Gabriel and I were friendly enough; perhaps she had learned, from husband and brother, that I was not such a scandal after all. At least for once she seemed to speak to me as if I were a human being. She beckoned to one of the young girls in the crowd surrounding her. “I wish to present to you a young kinswoman of your own, Lew, Linnea Storn-Lanart.”

Linnea Storn-Lanart was very young, certainly no older than Linnell, with russet hair falling in soft curls around a heart-shaped face. The Storns were old mountain nobility from the region near Aldaran who had intermarried years ago with Lanarts and Leyniers. What was a maiden so young doing alone in Thendara?

Linnea, although she seemed modest enough, raised her eyes with frank curiosity to my face. Mountain girls—I had heard this from my father—did not follow the exaggerated custom of the lowlands, where a direct glance at a strange man is immodest; hence mountain girls are often considered, here in the Domains, to be over-bold. She looked straight at me for a moment, smiling, then caught Javanne's eyes, flushed crimson and looked quickly at the toes of her slippers. I supposed Javanne had given her a lesson in proper manners for the Domains, and she did not wish to be thought countrified.

I was at a loss what to say to her. She was my kinswoman, or had been so presented to me, although the relationship could not be very close. Perhaps that was it—Javanne wished to spend her time dancing, not looking after a kinswoman too young to dance with strangers. I said, “Will you honor me with a dance,
damisela
?”

She glanced quickly at Javanne for permission, then nodded. I led her to the floor. She was a good dancer and seemed to enjoy it, but I kept wondering why my father should go out of his way to make life easy for Javanne. And why had he looked at me so meaningfully as we moved on to the dance floor? And why had he introduced her as a kinswoman, when the relationship must surely be far too distant to notice officially? When the music ended, it was still perplexing me.

I bluntly said, “What is this all about?”

Forgetting her careful briefing in manners, she blurted out, “Didn't they tell you? They told me!” Then her sudden blush flooded her face again. It made her look very pretty, but I was in no mood to appreciate it.

“Tell me
what
?” I demanded.

Her cheeks were like banners of crimson. She stammered. “I was t-told that—that we should look each other over, get to know one another, and that if we l-liked each other, then a—a marriage would be—” My face must have shown what I was thinking, for she broke off, leaving the sentence unfinished.

Damn them! Trying to run my life again!

The girl's gray eyes were wide, her childish mouth trembling. I quickly fought to control my anger, barrier myself. She was obviously very sensitive, at least an em-path, perhaps a telepath. I hoped, helplessly, that she wouldn't cry. None of this was her fault. I could just guess how her parents had been bribed or threatened, how she herself had been coaxed and flattered with the lure of a fine marriage to the heir of the Domain.

“Just what did they tell you about me, Linnea?”

She looked confused. “Only that you're Lord Alton's son, that you've served in the Arilinn Tower, that your mother was Terran—”

“And you think you can bear that disgrace?”

“Disgrace?” She looked puzzled. “Many of us in the Hellers have Terran blood; there are Terrans in my family. Do you think it is a disgrace?”

What could anyone her age know of this kind of court intrigue? I felt revolted, remembering Dyan's gloating look. Busy with his own affairs . . . Evidently he had known this was in the wind.

“
Damisela,
I have no mind to marry, and if I did I would not let Council choose a wife for me.” I tried to smile, but I suspect it was grim enough. “Don't look so downcast,
chiya,
a maiden as pretty as you will soon find a husband you'll like better.”

“I have no particular wish to marry,” she said with composure. “I had intended to apply for admission at one of the towers; my great-granddame was trained as a Keeper, and it seemed to her I was well fitted for it. But I have always obeyed my family and if they had chosen me a husband, I was not ill-content. I am only sorry that I seem not to please you.”

She was so calm that I felt trapped, almost frantic. “It is not that you displease me, Linnea. But I would not marry at their bidding.” My wrath flared up again; I felt her flinch from its impact. Her hand still rested lightly on my arm, as when we were dancing; she drew it away as if she had been burned. I felt like storming away and actually made a faint move to leave her, when I realized, just in time, that this would be a disgraceful thing to do. To abandon a young girl in the middle of a dance-floor would be a rudeness no man of breeding would ever commit against a gently reared young girl of unquestionable manners and reputation! I couldn't expose her to such gossip for, inevitably, everyone would be wondering what unspeakable thing she could possibly have done to deserve it. I glanced around. Javanne was dancing at the far end of the ballroom so I led Linnea toward the buffet. I offered her a glass of wine; she refused it with a headshake. I got her
shallan
instead, and stood sipping irritably at the wine myself. I didn't like it.

When I was a little calmer I said, “Nothing is irrevocable yet. You can tell whoever put you up to this—my father, old Hastur, whoever—you can tell them you don't like me and that will be the end of it.”

She smiled, a faint amused flicker. “But I do like you, Dom Lewis,” she said. “I won't lie about it, even if I thought I could. Lord Kennard would know it at once if I tried to lie to him. You're angry and unhappy, but I think if you weren't so angry, you'd be very nice. I would be well content with such a marriage. If you wish to refuse it, Lew, you must do the refusing.”

If she had been less young, less naïve, I might have flung at her that she could hardly be expected to give up a marriage into Comyn without protest. Even so, I am sure she caught the thought, for she looked distressed.

I shut out her thoughts and said flatly, “A woman should have the privilege of refusing. I thought to spare you the offense of hearing me say to my father that I did not—” I discovered that I could not simply say that I did not like her. I amended it and said, “That I did not intend to marry at their bidding.”

Her composure was disquieting. “No one marries at his own will. Do you really feel that a marriage between us would be unendurable, Lew? It is obvious that they will arrange some marriage or other for you.”

For a moment I wavered. She was evidently sensitive and intelligent; she had been considered for tower training, which meant
laran
. My father had evidently gone to some pains to choose a woman who would be maximally acceptable to me, one with Terran blood, one capable of that emotional and mental fusion a telepath must have in any woman he is to know intimately. She was pretty. She was no empty-minded doll, but had wit and poise. For a second I considered. Sooner or later I must marry, I had always known that. A Comyn heir must father children. And, the Gods knew, I was lonely, lonely . . .

And my father, damn him, had counted on just this reaction!
My anger flared anew. “
Damisela,
I have told you why I will not be party to any marriage made as this one was made. If you choose to believe that I have rejected you personally, that is your affair.” I drank the last in my wineglass and set it down. “Allow me to conduct you to my kinswomen, since Javanne is much occupied.”

Javanne was dancing again. Well, let her enjoy herself. She had been married off at fifteen and had spent the last nine years doing her duty to her family. They wouldn't catch me in that trap!

Gabriel had claimed a dance from Linnell—I was glad to see it—but Callina was standing at the edge of the floor. The crimson draperies she was wearing only accentuated the colorlessness of her bland features. I presented Linnea to her and asked Callina to look after her while I had a word with my father. She looked curious, evidently sensing my anger. I must be broadcasting it right and left.

My rage mounted as I circled the floor, looking for my father. Dyan had known and Hastur had known—how many others had been dragged into this? Had they held a Council meeting to discuss the fate of Lord Alton's bastard heir? How long had it taken them to find a woman who would have me? They'd had to go far afield, I noticed, and get one young enough to obey her father and mother without question! I supposed I ought to feel flattered that they'd pick a nice looking one!

I found myself face to face with the Regent. I gave him a curt greeting and started to pass him by; he laid a hand on my arm to detain me, wishing me the greetings of the season.

“I thank you, my lord. Have you seen my father?”

The old man said mildly, “If you're storming off to complain, Lew, why not come directly to me? It was I who asked my granddaughter to present the girl to you.” He turned to the buffet. “Have you had supper? The fruits are exceptional this season. We have ice-melons from Nevarsin; they're not usually obtainable in the market.”

“Thank you but I'm not hungry,” I said. “Is it permitted to ask why you take such an interest in my marriage, my lord? Or am I to feel flattered that you interest yourself, without asking why?”

“I take it the girl was not to your liking, then.”

“What could I possibly have against her? But forgive me, sir, I have certain distaste for airing my personal affairs before half the city of Thendara.” I moved my hand to indicate the dancing crowds. He smiled genially.

“Do you really think anyone here is intent on anything but his own affairs?” He was calmly filling his plate for himself with assorted delicacies. Sullenly, I followed suit. He moved toward a couple of reasonably isolated chairs and said, “We can sit here and talk, if you like. What's the matter, Lew? You're just about the proper age to be married.”