Staring at Srikkanth’s chest, Jaime thought Sophie wasn’t the only one who was smooth.
The doorbell rang, followed swiftly by Nathaniel yelling for Jaime. “Your date’s here.”
“Shit,” Jaime muttered, forgetting for a moment that Sophie was in the room. “Shoot, sorry, Sri. I’ll have to get used to watching my mouth again. I forgot I was supposed to go out with Randy tonight. I can see if he’d mind waiting so you can still get in your run.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Srikkanth replied, leaning down and kissing Sophie’s cheek. “We’ll be fine for tonight. Go enjoy your date. We’ll be here when you get home.”
Jaime nodded, backing out of the room slowly, wishing he didn’t have to leave. When they’d made the date, Sophie hadn’t been in the picture and he’d been looking forward to seeing Beecake at a local pub, but now, he wanted nothing more than to stay home and spend his uninterrupted hour with Sophie. There was nothing to be done for it. Randy was here, and they’d already paid for the tickets and made dinner reservations at the club. He’d just have to cajole Srikkanth into letting him spend a little extra time with her over the next few days. It was Friday. Maybe he could even steal her for a few hours tomorrow, since he didn’t have to work.
“I’ll just be a few minutes,” he called down to Randy. “I’m not quite ready.”
He changed clothes quickly into something more appropriate for a night out than the jeans and sweatshirt he was currently wearing, thinking the entire time how much more comfortable he’d be if he could just stay home. Before he went down the stairs to join Randy, he peeked in Srikkanth’s room again to get one more glimpse of him and Sophie together to hold him through the evening. If that wasn’t a sad state of affairs, he didn’t know what was.
As he suspected, Randy was sitting impatiently on the couch in the living room waiting for him. “What took you so long?” he snapped.
“I was helping Srikkanth with something,” Jaime replied, not really wanting to get into an explanation of Sophie and everything else. She was too special to share, and somehow he doubted Randy would get it any more than Nathaniel did.
Randy huffed in annoyance, but Jaime ignored him. He’d been looking forward to the chance to see Billy Boyd and his band in concert since he’d heard they were coming to town and he refused to let his “date” ruin that, even if he’d already decided he wouldn’t have time for another night out any time soon should the other man ask. Maybe—Jaime hoped it wasn’t just wishful thinking—Randy would be annoyed enough with his tardiness and general uncommunicativeness to refrain from trying to set another date. If not, Jaime had the perfect excuse. He’d simply tell Randy he had to babysit for Sophie.
When
the concert ended four hours later, Jaime had to admit he was glad he’d gone. The pub had delivered on its promise of an intimate setting, only seating about one hundred fifty people total, and the table he and Randy had reserved ended up being about ten feet from the stage. While they were waiting to get in, Billy Boyd had come out front to sign autographs and shoot the breeze with his fans. Once they’d gotten inside and the band came out, the evening had only gotten better. Billy chatted to the crowd like they were close personal friends, even exchanging quips with a group of women a few tables back that had Jaime doubled over laughing. The music had been spectacular, and Jaime had enjoyed every minute of the show.
If only he’d enjoyed the rest of the evening as much. Randy had been pretty much obnoxious except when the band was playing. Jaime wasn’t sure if he’d never noticed before or if his date was worse tonight than before. He knew he was less patient than usual with anything that kept him from home. For the past couple of weeks, he’d caught himself watching the clock at work, feeling the last hour drag like two, his thoughts fixed on Sophie and getting home to see her as quickly as possible. Tonight was no different, the thought of her going to bed without his giving her a good-night kiss almost enough to make him reject Randy’s invitation to linger for another round of drinks after the show ended. A quick glance at his watch showed the time already too late for Sophie’s regular bedtime, but she would be awake again during the night for a bottle. If Srikkanth was still awake when he got home, he’d offer to get up with her once, and if he wasn’t, Jaime could still sneak in for a kiss when he heard her wake up.
As Randy went to the bar to get their drinks, Jaime’s thoughts drifted back to Srikkanth holding Sophie before he left. He couldn’t help thinking how much Srikkanth would have enjoyed the concert and probably the break, although Sophie had been easier to deal with the last few days. Maybe he could offer to babysit for longer than just a run so Sri could go out for a movie or on a date. Even as he thought it, he knew he didn’t want that, a rather hypocritical thought given where he was at the moment. There was their agreement not to get involved with each other to consider, but a lot of things had changed in the past few weeks. He ignored Randy’s hints that they should go back to his place and resisted the other man’s blandishments urging him to agree to another date. Jaime wasn’t sure why Randy was trying so hard. It wasn’t like he was putting out or had any intention of doing so any time soon. When Randy persisted, Jaime finally snapped. “Look, we’ve had some fun together, but that’s all it is. Things have changed, and I won’t have nearly as much free time from here on.”
“We could still spend the time you do have together,” Randy said hopefully.
Jaime shook his head. “Thanks, but no.”
That was the end of easy conversation and sharing drinks. Jaime paid his portion of the tab and insisted he could take a taxi home. He just wanted to get away from Randy and back home with Sophie and Srikkanth where he belonged.
“
I was
thinking about getting a rocking chair,” Srikkanth told Jaime as he was making dinner a few days later. Sophie was awake, and Jaime had offered to hold her while Srikkanth cooked. Sophie didn’t seem to have any complaints about it, sitting happily in Jaime’s lap while Srikkanth puttered around the kitchen. They’d fallen into a routine even before Jaime’s date, but since that night when Jaime came into his room while he was giving Sophie a bottle to kiss her goodnight, Jaime had hardly left Sophie’s side except to work and sleep. Sophie had started to recognize Jaime, too, reaching for him the same way she reached for Srikkanth. Srikkanth had vacillated between jealousy and relief for as long as it took him to remember that most babies grew up with—loved—two parents without their affection for one in any way diminishing their affection for the other. Once he’d given himself that kick in the pants, he’d stopped worrying about accepting Jaime’s offers of assistance. Besides, he didn’t know how he’d manage without Jaime’s help.
“That’s a good idea,” Jaime agreed. “I don’t know that it’ll fit in your room, though.”
“Yeah, I’d have to put it downstairs in the living room, but that puts it—and us—out in Nathaniel’s way even more than we already are.”
“You already know my opinion on that matter,” Jaime said, his lip curling at the thought of the ever more negative comments their third roommate had made over the past few weeks. “Sophie’s here to stay, so he can either get over it or move somewhere else.”
Srikkanth couldn’t argue with that except that it left him in a bind as far as the mortgage was concerned. He’d have to find another renter, and that would be even more difficult now that they’d have to tell any new housemate that there was a baby in the house along with two gay men. He couldn’t afford to force the issue.
“How long until dinner?” Nathaniel called from his room.
“About twenty minutes,” Srikkanth called back, checking the timer on the rice.
Nathaniel didn’t reply, but a moment later they heard the water running in the shower. Jaime rolled his eyes and refrained from mentioning
again
how much Nathaniel was getting on his nerves. Srikkanth knew already, and complaining didn’t do anything but spread negativity. His mother had lectured him repeatedly when he was younger about having a positive attitude and not adding negative energy to the world. “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all” was still her favorite adage. He wasn’t completely convinced she was right, but he’d learned the lesson anyway. He found it hard to be negative verbally in all but the most extreme circumstances.
About the time the rice was ready, Nathaniel came into the kitchen. “I’ll be moving out at the end of the month,” he announced. “I’ve found a new apartment where I’ll be more assured of peace and quiet. I can’t study with all the baby’s noise.”
Srikkanth nodded silently, knowing it had only been a matter of time. He did some quick calculating, trying to figure out how long he could afford to make up Nathaniel’s portion of the mortgage before he’d be in trouble financially. He figured he could make it a couple of months before they absolutely had to have a new roommate again.
“Thanks for letting me know early in the month,” he said finally. “The sooner I start looking for someone to move in, the better.”
Nathaniel nodded in return, serving a plateful of rice and curry and returning to his room to study.
“Do you really want to try to break in a new housemate with Sophie already here?” Jaime asked when Nathaniel’s door shut behind him.
“It doesn’t matter what I want,” Srikkanth replied. “I have to pay the mortgage, and I can’t make up the difference for very many months without a third person chipping in.”
“Can you pay half?” Jaime asked.
Srikkanth calculated quickly. “Yes, but that isn’t fair to you. You moved in with the understanding that you’d pay five hundred a month in rent.”
Jaime shrugged. “I can afford a bit extra, and we can use the extra room as a nursery. Sophie’s going to outgrow your room before too long. That way you’ll have a bit of privacy back as well.”
Srikkanth shook his head and stared at Jaime in bemusement. “Why are you doing this?”
“Because no one should have to raise a baby alone,” Jaime replied as if it were the most obvious answer in the world.
“I appreciate the offer,” Srikkanth said slowly, “but I’d feel better if I at least look for someone to take Nathaniel’s room. I’ll put some ads out tomorrow and see what happens.”
“Let me know if you have any interviews,” Jaime requested. “I’d like to meet whoever might be moving in.”
“Of course!” Srikkanth exclaimed. “It wouldn’t be fair to you to have someone move in without your approval. Whatever we decide to do, we’ll decide it together.”
Jaime left it at that as Srikkanth dished up a plate for him and set it on the table where he could reach it. Looking down at Sophie, Jaime smiled and kissed her forehead again before picking up his fork.
As he started to eat, Jaime tried to imagine adding another person to their table. It was easy to imagine Sophie there in a few years, but the thought of sharing her attention with a third adult now did not appeal at all. He told himself that was ridiculous, but his head didn’t seem to have any control over his heart in this matter. He could accept it and move on or fight it and fail. He figured he might as well accept it and figure out how to make sure he didn’t end up in an untenable solution. He doubted Srikkanth would find many takers anyway, given that they’d have to share the condo with two men and a baby, but Jaime decided right then to find a reason to reject anyone who was seriously interested. Sophie needed her own space, and so did Srikkanth, and that meant keeping Nathaniel’s room unoccupied.
“That’s quite a scowl on your face,” Srikkanth commented. “Is everything all right?”
Consciously, Jaime summoned a smile. “Yes, I was just thinking about the hassle of finding a new roommate. Are you sure that’s necessary? Couldn’t I just move down here so we can turn my room into a proper nursery? She can have her own bed, and you can get the rocking chair you were talking about earlier. And that way she’ll have a place for her toys.”
It was tempting, Srikkanth had to admit to himself, but it didn’t seem fair to Jaime. He’d see how things went with the interviews and go from there.
The
smell of cigarette smoke clung to the clothes of the first person they met. Srikkanth had run out of space in the ad after mentioning two men and a baby in the condo and hadn’t had room for his usual no-smoker comment. He grimaced at the stench. Even across the room, he saw Jaime’s nose twitch and then Sophie’s little face scrunch up as the stale odor reached them. Srikkanth went through the niceties, but they all knew this was a pointless interview. “So you’re a smoker?” he asked after a few minutes.
The man shrugged. “I have one occasionally.”
“With the baby in the house, we really can’t have you smoking here,” Srikkanth said, not needing Jaime to tell him that.
“Oh, it’s not a problem,” the prospective renter said with a smile. “I can always go outside. You’ve got a patio, right? That’s fine for me.”
Srikkanth wasn’t sure what he thought of that, but he completed the interview anyway. The only time he’d ever accepted a roommate on the spot was Jaime, and while that had worked out incredibly well, he wanted to discuss any decisions with his friend, particularly since Jaime knew so much more about what Sophie would need than he did.
“No way,” Jaime said as soon as the man closed the door on his way out. “If he smokes enough to smell that strong, he’ll still expose Sophie to the toxins. Thirdhand smoke isn’t quite as bad as secondhand smoke, but that doesn’t mean it’s good for her.”
“I wasn’t sure,” Srikkanth agreed, “but it makes sense. I mean, it’s unpleasant to be around even if it weren’t harmful.”
“For all of us.” Jaime cradled Sophie closer protectively, glad he didn’t have to persuade Srikkanth out of this one.
Srikkanth nodded. “I’ll call him later and let him know to keep looking then. I’ve only had one other person interested. She’s coming at the end of the week to meet us.”
“She?” Jaime repeated, not sure how he felt about adding a woman to their comfortably masculine existence. Sophie didn’t count. Not at three weeks old, for sure!
Srikkanth shrugged. “I didn’t see any harm in meeting her. We’ve always had male roommates, but that’s more a question of the way it worked out than because of anything set in stone, at least for my part.”
Jaime tried to think about it objectively, but every image assailing him detailed the woman swooping in, seeing Sophie, and taking over her care, leaving Jaime, if not Srikkanth, out in the cold. “We can meet her,” he said, not able to work up any enthusiasm for the thought.
If Jaime
hadn’t been looking for a reason to reject any roommate, he suspected he’d have been fine with Julie, the woman who came to interview with them on Friday. She was polite, had good references, had a steady job, and could move in immediately. The only problem was the fact that she only needed a place for six months while she was working on a project. Once that was over, she’d be moving out again. Before Sophie, that wouldn’t have particularly posed a problem for Jaime and Srikkanth. It gave them time to search for a longer-term roommate, but Jaime didn’t want a new roommate, short or long term. When the woman left, he turned to Srikkanth.
“I don’t like the idea of someone moving in for just a couple of months,” he said. “Sophie needs more stability than that. She’ll get attached to Julie and then Julie will be gone and she won’t understand why. If we’re going to have someone move in, it needs to be someone who plans to stay.”
“For how long?” Srikkanth asked worriedly. “I mean, we can’t expect someone to commit to moving in here with us until Sophie’s grown.”
“No, of course not,” Jaime agreed, “but we don’t want a revolving door either. At her age, she needs to form attachments that last more than a few months. It’s incredibly important for babies to have that kind of stability.”
“All right,” Srikkanth conceded. “I’ll tell Julie we’re not interested.”
They
got a call about a week later from another person interested in their ad. Jaime grimaced behind his hand when Srikkanth told him, wondering what excuse he could possibly use to reject this one. He agreed to the meeting time Srikkanth proposed and spent the week plotting ways to convince Srikkanth not to let anyone move in. Ever.