Read Her Sexiest Mistake Online
Authors: Jill Shalvis
Whoa.
“Beth.” Kevin let out a low laugh and shoved a hand through his hair, a gesture Mia recognized as discomfort. “I can’t.”
“What is it, another woman? Who could be more important than your ex-wife?”
Mia absorbed that with a little shock of jealousy, which was not only stupid, but made no sense. The ex. The one he’d married when he was eighteen. The one who’d broken his heart.
“The thing is,” Kevin said. “There’s an
ex
in
ex
-wife for a reason.”
“Damn it,” Blond Woman said. “Don’t give me that. We were kids and I was stupid. I want another shot at you.”
Mia would have given anything to see Kevin’s face. Did he want another chance, too?
And what would she do if he did?
She didn’t realize she was holding her breath until Kevin shook his head. “Beth—”
“Don’t tell me no.”
“I know the word is foreign to you, I know. But no. There’s someone else.”
“Ditch her.”
“Yeah.” Kevin laughed roughly. “Can’t do that.”
“Why not? You in love or something?”
At that, Mia laughed to herself. Love. Yeah, right. As if he’d fall in love with
her.
But Kevin didn’t laugh. “Actually,” he said, his back still to Mia, “I don’t know yet.”
Mia gasped and Kevin whipped around to face her, and if Mia had thought she couldn’t breathe before, she was really screwed now. “I…have to go,” she said brilliantly.
“Mia.” He grimaced. “I—”
“No. Listen, I really have to go.”
“I think it was the L-word,” Beth told Kevin with a
tsk.
“She lost all her color at that, did you notice?”
“I—I’m sorry.” Mia couldn’t draw air into her taxed lungs. “I really have to go.”
“Yeah, that’s the classic kiss-off,” Beth said to Kevin helpfully.
“If you could just zip it for a minute,” he said.
Beth shrugged. “Sure. I’ll meet you in the bar when she’s done dumping you.”
Kevin ignored her and looked at Mia again, who swallowed hard.
“I’m not the falling-in-love sort of woman,” she whispered. “I don’t even get close enough to have this conversation. I don’t even like to repeat.”
“You repeated me.”
“I know, I just don’t know why.”
“Don’t you?”
“Look, I’m not good at sharing myself. In fact, I don’t share at all. I think I missed that day in kindergarten.”
“So what now then?” he asked. “Are you freaking out and walking away?”
“Oh, I’m freaking out.” She put a hand to her racing heart, looked at her legs. “But I don’t appear to be walking away.”
He let out a breath.
“Of course I can’t walk because my legs turned to rubber and I can’t feel my toes.”
At that, he smiled, the one that always made her feel everything was going to be okay, and reached for her hand. “How about we just take it one step at a time?”
She felt his long, strong fingers entwined with hers, and could suddenly breathe. “As long as you’re not in a hurry.”
“No hurry,” he promised. “Let’s get out of here?”
He took her to the beach, where they kicked off their shoes and let their toes sink into the sand, still warm from the sun of the day.
With her Choo’s dangling from her fingers, Mia stared out at the pounding surf. “I can feel my toes again.”
He smiled.
“What?”
“Nothing. You just said that with a very Southern accent, that’s all.”
Mia scrubbed a hand over her face.
“I like the sound of it.”
“It’s Tennessee. I’m Southern white trash from a single-wide stuffed to the gills with crap.”
“Tennessee is pretty. And there’s nothing wrong with living in a trailer, if that’s your life.”
“It was,” she said quietly. “For far too long. Hope feels the same. It’s why she’s here. I can’t believe she’s staying another month. God help the both of us.”
“It’ll be good.”
“Said the man who doesn’t have to listen to her music or live in fear of flipping on a light switch and having the doorbell go off instead.”
“Is it that bad?” he asked quietly.
She stared at him. Shook her head. “I hate that I waited sixteen years to get to know her,” she whispered. “But I wish like hell I could have eased into this instead of going from no contact to a full-time gig.”
“Well, that’s honest, at least.”
She let out a breath. “Yeah.”
“Put her in my science class. It’s where she wants to be anyway.”
Mia turned to him, took in the strong lines of his body and face, and felt some of her tension release. He wasn’t going to be scared off, as she might have been. He wasn’t going to do anything but accept her. The realization was like a breath of fresh air. “You’ll still add her?”
“I can’t wait to add her. She’s smart, Mia.” Kevin leaned in and touched his lips to hers, and she felt the shocking urge to cling.
Cling.
“And so are you,” he said. “You’ll both find the happy medium. If you want it.”
If she wanted it…If she wanted it…
He was still looking at her, and now he was closer than he’d been. Mia had no idea how badly she wanted his mouth on hers until he leaned in and gave her just that, put his warm, sexy lips to hers with a soft, low sound that scraped at her belly. His hands came up and cradled her face, his fingers sinking into her hair as the taste and smell of him surrounded her like the soft mist from the ocean at her back. The kiss seemed to flow all the way through her, along her veins, in time to the beat of her heart, much deeper than she’d imagined, igniting all sorts of sensations.
His fingers tightened on her, and he made a low, lost noise that had her pressing her body closer, closer still, hungry in a way she couldn’t remember feeling, hungry and needy. They kissed and kissed like that, until a wave splashed over their feet, making her gasp.
He pulled back and slowly opened his eyes, as if he needed a moment, and she knew the feeling. She put a hand on his jaw, mesmerized by him, pulled in by him like the gravitational pull of the tide.
“What was that for?” she whispered, her voice a little hoarse.
“To show you the happy medium. It’s right there, for the taking.”
The words haunted her on the long, lovely, dark ride home through the night while holding on to a warm, hard body she most definitely wanted next to hers.
Kevin enjoyed the ride as well, and especially the arms around him holding him tight. When he turned off the bike and pulled off his helmet, he turned to Mia. “Cold?”
“No.” Mia let out a long sigh that sounded blissful, and slowly, almost reluctantly it seemed, slipped her arms from around his middle—or maybe that was just wishful yearning on his part.
But slip away she did, pulling off the helmet, tossing back her hair. “I could do that every night.”
Worked for him.
“I hear you go out sometimes, you know. I lie in bed and think
Lucky bastard.
”
“Join me anytime.”
She handed him the helmet. “Anytime is a pretty wide-open invite.”
“I mean it.”
She didn’t respond to that, and he knew she was considering the offer, maybe putting it up against the other things he’d said tonight.
“Let me walk you inside,” he said and reached for her hand.
“Actually…” She met his gaze, her own steady and warming with each passing second. “I was thinking I’d walk
you
inside.”
She brushed her mouth over his jaw as he unlocked his front door. Then, when she followed him in, she turned to face him and fastened her mouth to his throat. “Your bike makes me hot,” she murmured between nibbles. She slid her arms around his neck and tugged his mouth to hers. “Hurry up and get your mouth on me.”
He couldn’t think when she looked at him like that, like she was already halfway to orgasmic bliss and only he could get her the rest of the way. To slow her down, he captured her hands and held her arms out to her sides.
“Kevin? What are you doing?”
“Looking at you.” Her work clothes fascinated him, but tonight she wore tight black jeans and a long, sleeveless black-and-silvery sheer tunic sort of thing, with a black camisole beneath. He hadn’t been able to take his eyes off her. He pulled off the tunic while she tugged his light jacket off his shoulders, gliding her hands beneath his shirt, shoving it up to put her mouth on his pec, making his muscles jump and quiver as she spread hot, open-mouthed kisses across his chest. “God. Why are you wearing so many clothes?”
With all the blood in his brain draining south for the cause, he couldn’t talk. He reached for her instead, but his arms caught at his side, trapped in the jacket hanging at his elbows. “Damn it.”
She let out a breathless laugh and popped open his Levi’s. “I love your body. I could just eat you up. How did you get to be so gorgeous?”
Flapping his arms, he let the jacket fall off. Then he tore off his shirt and made the same haste with hers. One quick tug had her camisole to her waist, her breasts free. He filled his hands with them while she kicked off her heels. “My jeans,” she said breathlessly. “Hurry.”
In a blink, he had her jeans off, his down, and a condom on. Whipping them around, he pressed her back against the door and lifted her up, wrapping her legs around him. “Hold on,” he demanded and thrust into her, her soft cry mingling with his low groan. It was all he could do to hold them upright. He had no idea how he could need her this way, crave her like water, but somehow she filled him, just as he now filled her.
As if she felt the same, she stared into his eyes as she held on tight, allowing him to see her, the hunger, the want, the need, the affection, all of it, and it staggered him.
In that moment, something within him shifted, changed.
Fell.
It was as if he could see, for that one beat, every bit of her, all the way to her heart and soul. She was accepting him, maybe for the first time, wanting him, letting him in. He almost lost it on that alone because, though he’d wanted this very thing from her, he hadn’t been sure she had it to give. Throat thick, he touched his forehead to hers.
“Please,” she whispered, gliding her hands up his back.
Yeah, I’ll please,
he thought and began to move, thrusting in and out until she shattered in his arms, eyes glazed but open on his, mouth trembling as his name tumbled with shock from her lips. He lasted another whole big whopping two seconds before he let himself go as well. His knees buckled as he shuddered into his powerful climax, and he took them both down to the floor. “Jesus,” he breathed, then murmured it again on a shaky sigh, brushing his lips over her hair. “You’re going to kill me,” he said.
“Mmm. But what a way to go.” She looked hot and damp and extremely proud of herself. Propping a hand on his still-heaving chest, she leaned in and kissed him. “Thanks.”
He blinked when she got up.
“Thanks?”
“Yeah. I needed that.” She slipped back into her jeans, then her heels. And then, while he was still trying to gather his wits, flat on his back on the floor, his pants still at his thighs, she pulled open the front door.
“No. You are not—”
But he was talking to himself because she was already gone. “—leaving.”
He stared up at his ceiling, wondering if she’d thanked him for dinner, the orgasm, or for just plain being an idiot.
M
onday morning, Hope came downstairs, groggy and sleepy and wishing mornings didn’t come so early. Mia liked to get up at the crack of dawn, which proved it—they couldn’t really be related.
Over the weekend, Mia had taken her shopping in Beverly Hills, where the prices had given her sticker shock.
And then Hope had taken Mia shopping in return—to Target, where Mia was coaxed into buying a pair of sweats that actually looked quite comfortable. They’d had fun, a fact that surprised both of them.
All weekend, Hope’s cell phone had been vibrating with messages from Adam. She’d saved them and read every single one over and over. All she had to do was call him or text him back, but she knew what he wanted, what he expected, and though she’d thought she was ready, she wasn’t.
It’s just that Friday night, at Tess’s, they’d watched a movie with subtitles for Mike, who Hope kept forgetting was deaf because he was so…normal. She’d sat in Tess’s small but comfortable living room, watching Mike make Tess smile. An odd envy had twisted through her, which made no sense. She could have called Adam…
And maybe if he’d looked at her like Mike looked at Tess, she would have. All warm and safe.
But nothing about it seemed safe. Truthfully, being with him reminded her of being back home. Sugar’s guys always made her feel a little uncomfortable, too, and a little weird. It felt disloyal to think it, and just a little mean, but she couldn’t help it.
And as Sugar hadn’t shown up, the feeling must be mutual. Mia had made excuses for Sugar, but Hope knew the truth. Her momma didn’t want her back. With a sigh, she moved toward the kitchen, hoping there were still donuts, but she couldn’t count on it since her aunt had developed a fondness for them, too.
From the kitchen came Mia’s voice. “You win, Sugar,” Mia said clearly on the phone. “Take your damn thirty days.”
Thirty days? Hope’s heart jerked with hopeful excitement. Had she heard right? She opened the kitchen door in time to hear Mia say, “But at the end, you’d better—Hey!” Her aunt pulled the phone away from her ear and stared at it. “She hung up on me.
Bitch
—” She broke off when she caught sight of Hope standing in the doorway. She let out a little smile, though it seemed a little strained.
Hope couldn’t blame her, seeing as she’d just been shit on by Sugar. Hope knew the feeling well. “Hi.”
“Hi back atcha. Want some breakfast? I’ve actually managed to boil water for oatmeal.”
“No, thanks.” Hope’s happy little bubble had burst, leaving her feeling just a little sick. How she’d forgotten, even for a second, that Mia didn’t want her, either, was beyond her. “I can walk to the teen center this morning.”
“Driving you is no problem. Kevin told me he ordered the parts for your car.”
This was thrown in so casually Hope blinked. “He…did? But I don’t have the money.”
“I can always give you a list of chores to do to earn it. You know, like…
Cinderella.
”
Hope blushed. So Mia had heard the stories she’d been telling.
Mia looked at her watch. “Yikes. We have to leave, if I’m going to sign you up for Kevin’s class.”
Hope’s heart clutched. “What? Really?
“Really.”
“I know you don’t want me here.”
Mia let out a sigh, then stood and came close. “You understand that it’s your mother who drives me insane, not you, right?”
“I drive you insane, too. I make steam come out your ears. I’ve seen it.”
Mia smiled at that. “And you enjoy that—don’t pretend you don’t.”
“You’re not who I expected.” Hope hadn’t meant for that to come out, but there it was.
“What’d you expect?”
“I don’t know. I mean, you’re beautiful and you have an amazing place, though you have flying ants in my bathroom coming out of the ceiling.”
“What?”
“Yeah, and by the way,
ewwww.
But anyway, you have a kick-ass job, and your car—” She sighed. “Heaven. But it seems…I don’t know. Not cold exactly. But emptier than I thought it would be.”
Mia looked staggered. “You think my life is empty?”
“More like lonely. You don’t even have a plant.”
“I’m not lonely,” Mia said, looking affronted. “And just so you know, I have a plant in my office. Sure, it’s not looking so good right now, but I really don’t get what the big deal is.”
“I’m just saying I came here looking for a different life…”
Mia closed her eyes. “I know. I lived your life. I remember.”
“And this is great. But when I’m older, I want…more,” Hope whispered, an odd lump in her throat. “I don’t know what exactly, just
more.
”
“I’m sorry, Hope.” She really looked it. “But for now, you’re stuck. Your mom—”
“I know.”
Mia nodded. “Then let’s at least get you in Kevin’s class, if he’ll still have you.”
“I’m still going to drive you crazy.” She held her breath, waiting for Mia to deny it.
“Uh huh. And I’m going to drive you crazy, too. We’ll call it even.”
No pat, easy answer. Just the honest truth. Hope looked at her and suddenly felt like smiling, because, after all, she was getting pretty much what she’d wanted.
“Now for the rules,” Mia said.
“We already did this.”
“We’re doing it again. Rule number one—”
“There’s more than one?”
“Listen up, smart-ass, and you can tell me yours, too. First, no rattling my windows with your music.”
“Fine. No making fun of my makeup.”
“Ouch. I’ll try. No more smoking.”
“Only if you give up the God complex,” Hope said.
“What?”
“Come on, you’re always right and your opinion is the only one that matters.”
Mia rolled her lips together and considered. “Overruled. I
am
God here in this house. Next rule—no sex.”
“You’ve already mentioned this a time or two.”
“You can never repeat it enough. No sex.”
“You can’t make a rule like that.”
“I can and I am,” Mia said firmly.
“I’m sixteen. Old enough.”
“Not in my house, it isn’t.”
“How about you?”
Mia lifted her chin. “I, thankfully,
am
old enough.”
“That sucks.”
“Take it or leave it,” Mia said.
Hope had no intention of leaving it. To give herself a second, she kicked her toe over the tile and left a mark. To her credit, Mia hardly grimaced. “I’ll take it,” Hope said.
On the drive to the high school, Mia pulled out her cell phone and called Tess. “I’ve made a bunch of calls. I have five clients who’d love to interview you.”
“That’s incredibly sweet,” Tess said. “But I told you, I’m making a go at this cookie dough thing full-time. I mean, honestly, can you think of a better job than making cookie dough?”
Um, yes, but she’d keep that to herself.
“Oh, and remember when you said you wanted to help? Well, know any good ad execs?”
Mia grinned. “Are you kidding? I’ll make you an ad campaign that makes you rich.”
“Hey, if I just make a living, I’ll be thrilled.”
Mia would make sure of it.
“How’s it going there with Hope?”
Mia looked over at her niece. The jet-black hair dye was slowly fading. She still wore black pants and black boots, but her tank was gray today. More interesting, she didn’t have all the metal and steel armor on. “Hope’s good. But my house has flying ants.”
“Termites? Oh, no! You have to get rid of them before they eat your house. I’ll call someone for you.”
“Honey, that’s the beauty of no longer being my assistant—you don’t have to do this stuff anymore.”
“You’re like a lifelong habit. Let me call Buddy.”
Buddy was one of Tess’s ex-boyfriends. He’d been a great guy, except for his inability to date only one woman at a time. “Tell me you’re not still in contact with him.”
“How about we focus on your house not being destroyed,” Tess said diplomatically, because of course she was still in touch with Buddy. She was still in touch with everyone she’d ever met. It was that big-heart thing again. “I’m calling him.”
Imagining the termites sitting on their butts gnawing on her wood walls, Mia sighed. “Fine, thanks.” She clicked off and walked Hope into the high school, feeling an unaccustomed set of nerves. She had no idea why until she stopped in the doorway to Kevin’s classroom.
And then she knew exactly why.
Kevin himself. Friday night, and the wild, wonderful, amazing sex.
She’d avoided him all weekend, needing to think.
Obsess.
When they’d made love, right before she’d climaxed something had happened. Time had stopped, worlds had collided, and stars had fallen.
She still had no idea what that little beat had been about, but for that one second something had happened, something deep and connected and…terrifying.
And when they’d finished, she realized she lay there breathing crazily and hugging up to him like a lost little monkey, so she forced herself to get up and get out.
He was pissed, and she knew it.
But she’d had to go or lose it, and for the rest of the weekend, whenever her brain wandered from where she’d ordered it, it always took her back to that moment at the end when he’d been buried inside her, when she looked into his eyes and exploded. And then the next, which was her leaving him flat on the floor, looking hot and sated. Sexy.
Exhausted.
Hurt.
God, her heart hurt, too. She was actually having pains over this. Now the person responsible for those pains stood at the front of the room, his back to them, writing something across the board.
He turned around. He wore loose cargo jeans, those perpetually unlaced boots, and an unbuttoned long-sleeved shirt over a plain white T-shirt that read:
I AM AUTHORIZED TO THINK YOU’RE STUPID
, both shirts having apparently never met an iron they liked. His hair was adorably rumpled, and when he smiled at Hope, it turned Mia upside down.
Again Friday night flashed in her mind, how he looked after they’d both come so explosively all over each other. His eyes had been dark and soft, and the way he’d touched her—
God.
Something fathomless and yawning had opened up inside her, and she couldn’t seem to close it again.
It was so big she couldn’t face it, but she needn’t have worried. He wasn’t looking at her like that anymore. In fact, he wasn’t even looking at her at all.
“Hey,” he said to Hope, sounding extremely pleased. “Tell me you’re here to add my class.”
Hope nodded.
“Great! We don’t start for another fifteen minutes, so let me show you what we’re working on.” He gestured Hope toward his desk and they put their heads together over a book.
Mia, still at the door, cleared her throat.
They both looked up.
And for the first time in her life, Mia didn’t know what to say, how to charm, how to get her way. Hell, she didn’t even know what her way even
was.
“Kevin.”
“Thanks for letting her take the class,” he said, smile cool, eyes equally cool. “Was there anything else?”
Ouch.
And for no known reason, a ball of panic began to swirl deep in her gut. “Uh…no.”
How to fix this? How?
But before she could decide, he went back to showing Hope something in the book.
And Mia, well used to alienating people and moving on, lifted her chin and walked right out of the room.
Kevin turned to watch her go, then tossed aside his dry-erase pen and shoved his fingers through his hair, swearing softly. He caught Hope’s curious eye and muttered an apology.
“That’s okay,” Hope said, wise beyond her years as he knew her to be. “She brings out the worst in people. All us Applebys do.”
Kevin stared at her. “Is that what you think?”
She lifted a shoulder. “Fact is fact.”
The girl’s bravado attitude matched her aunt’s, and damn if he wasn’t incredibly attached to both of them—prickly, grumpy,
beautiful.
Still, Mia had hurt him, letting him feel he was nothing more than a good lay.
Or a bad one, as she’d tried to convince him so many times.
For every step they took forward, she pushed them back two. In fact, unless they were in bed—or on his foyer floor—lost in their odd and wonderful chemical attraction, she was doing her damnedest to pretend their connection didn’t exist.
And if the way Hope looked at the world—that is to say suspiciously and very, very carefully—was any indication of how Mia had been as a kid, then she had been doing it for a long time.
She probably had reasons, too. Good reasons.
Not that he’d know, because she didn’t talk about herself.
Well, that was the first thing that was going to change. He’d been patient; he’d been easy.
But if she wanted more, then so did he.
And he figured she owed him. Big. He was going to make her pay up, and it wouldn’t be in her favored way. It would be with talking. And then and only then would he let her distract him with that gorgeous body.
The thought of it amused him.
And aroused him.
Hope was looking at him strangely. “So you really like her, huh?”
Hell if that wasn’t the unfortunate truth. “Is that a problem?”
“Not for me. But for you, it might be.”
Yeah. Truer words had never been spoken.