Authors: Jennifer Ryan
The first year was filled with cheering each other on in competition and dinners out with lots of laughs and good times. Then Rowdy suffered a minor back injury after a hard fall from a bull. He drank away the pain and Brandy’s affection. His quick temper turned volatile, his sharp words followed by a hard shake, a slap, and worse. When Dane saw the bruises on Brandy, he made it clear that if Rowdy touched Brandy in anger again, Dane would pay him back in kind. Rowdy, resentful of Dane’s continued success, distanced himself and isolated Brandy. They showed up less and less often at the rodeos. Dane gave up trying to get through to Rowdy, but he maintained his friendship with Brandy, checking in with her often to make sure she was okay.
“What’s going on with you and the doctor?” Brandy asked, giving him a knowing smile. Like Bell, she thought he needed to tame his wild ways.
Dane deflected that loaded question. “What is going on with you and Rowdy? I recognize that look on your face and the bruises on your arm.”
Brandy pulled down her shirtsleeve, covering the dots of bruises on the inside of her arm where Rowdy’s fingers left their mark. Dane didn’t let her see his anger, but damn, he hated to see those marks. He hated the man even more. Real men did not hit women.
“He comes around sometimes. He wants to see Kaley. When I refuse, he gets physical.”
“Which is why you need to keep him away from you and your little girl.” Dane read the indecision in her eyes. “No matter how much he pleads and begs and tells you he’s a changed man, Brandy. They’re all lies. He gets to drinking, and you know the outcome. He’s hurt you too many times for you to ever believe he’ll change. You can’t take the chance he hurts Kaley.”
“I’ll never let that happen. I’ve learned my lesson. I won’t let him back in my life.”
“Has he said anything more about getting a lawyer and visitation rights?”
“Doesn’t matter if he does. I made sure he won’t get them. Well, not easily anyway.”
“What did you do?”
“What I had to do to protect my daughter.” Brandy’s voice held the conviction he wished he heard more often. He wished she’d use that tone with Rowdy. Maybe then the asshole would leave her alone.
Too many times, she didn’t stand her ground. Since she got pregnant with Kaley, she’d found her courage. If she couldn’t stand strong for herself, she’d stand strong for her little girl. Dane wished for more for their sake, but he couldn’t do more than he already did for them. They weren’t his business. Unless she asked for his help, he needed to stay out of it.
Brandy stayed and talked to him about Kaley and all the cute new things she did each and every day. At a year and a half, she was giving Brandy a run for her money, literally running all over the place, playing with one thing or another. Brandy beamed, her joy so evident in her smile and words.
Dane loved hanging out with Gillian’s little brother, Justin, whenever he made it home for a visit. Now he’d have a niece or nephew to add to the mix when Gillian gave birth. He wished he was better and could drive back to Montana on his own and stop in Colorado and visit Caleb, Summer, and their new little baby, Lily. Happy for his brother, he wanted to see the little girl that made Caleb light up in all the pictures they sent him.
He wanted that kind of happiness for himself. He wished he knew how to get it. He’d never found it with any of the women he’d dated. Of course, he’d never been looking for it. He’d never put in the time and effort to get to know any of them in any kind of deep or meaningful way, to see if they could cultivate something more than a hangover.
The physical therapist showed up at the same time his family did.
“I’ve got to get on the road and back to Arizona,” Brandy said. “I needed to see for myself that you’re okay.” She leaned over and gave him a hug. He might have held her a little longer than usual, thankful he had a good friend like her in his life.
“I’ll be fine. Take care of yourself and your little girl.”
“I will.”
Dane hated the sense of dread that came over him every time he let Brandy out of his sight. He held her hand and gave it a squeeze. “Brandy, no matter what he says, no matter what he does, do not let him back into your life. When you look at him, you want to see the man you fell in love with. I want to see my old friend. But he’s changed. He’s not that guy anymore.”
Brandy squeezed his hand back and gave him a reassuring smile. “I’ll call you. Stay out of trouble and listen to your doctor.”
“Trouble finds me,” he teased, hoping trouble didn’t go looking for her.
F
inally that bitch was home. Rowdy had waited for nearly two hours. She never got home this late. She better not have been out with some guy when she should have been home, taking care of his kid.
Instead of getting out of the car, Brandy sat in the front seat of her old Honda, texting on her cell. He jumped out of his truck and stumbled, catching his balance at the last second. He grabbed the door handle and pulled her car door open, leaning on it with one hand, the other planted on the roof as he bent over her and held himself up at the same time.
“Where the fuck have you been?”
Brandy gasped. Her eyes went wide. She pressed her phone to her chest. “Oh my God. You scared the shit out of me. What are you doing here?”
“Waiting for you to get your ass home.”
“By the smell of it, you either just came from a bar, or you’ve been drinking in your truck. Either way, you’re not supposed to be here.”
“I can go wherever the hell I want.”
“Yeah, but you always end up here, even though you know I don’t want to see you.”
He grabbed her arm and tugged. “Get out and give me a hug.”
She pulled back, leaning farther into the car. “No. I’ve told you time and time again. We are not together anymore. Go home and sleep it off.”
“Can’t we talk?”
“I’ve said everything I have to say.”
Her cell phone chimed with another text. She held it against her chest, her gaze down on her lap.
“Where have you been?”
“Work.”
“Liar. I checked at work. You didn’t have a shift tonight. What are you hiding?”
“I’m not hiding anything.”
The cell phone chimed again. This time, he didn’t grab her; he snatched the phone from her hand. He took two steps back, swiping his finger over the screen to read the texts.
Brandy came out of the car, yelling, “Give that back. You have no right to look at my private messages.”
She tried to grab the phone, but he held it over his head. She jumped for it. All he did was laugh and give her a push to get her to back up. She landed on her ass on the driveway and stared up at him with that look on her face.
“What? You did that all on your own.”
“You pushed me.”
“You came after me.”
She stood and held out her hand. “Give me my phone, or I’ll go inside and call the cops.”
He pretended to hand it over, but he snatched it back and laughed until he saw who sent the texts. “Dane. You’re fucking Dane.”
“It’s none of your business who I talk to and see.”
“Where have you been? Did you drive to Las Vegas to see him?”
“No.”
Brandy: Just got home.
Dane: Thanks for coming. I’m glad we got to talk.
Brandy: Me too.
Dane: Kaley is getting so big. I miss my girl.
Brandy: She misses you. Come visit.
Dane: I will soon. If you need anything, call me.
Brandy: Get better soon.
Dane: Send more pics of Kaley.
Dane: Sweet dreams, honey.
Rowdy felt his simmering temper flare to life like a living thing. His whole body tensed.
“Kaley is my child. Not his.” He bit out the words he shouldn’t have to say.
Stupid bitch cheated on him. Maybe she said she wasn’t with him any longer, but she didn’t mean it. Back then, she’d never meant it. She’d always come back to him. Until that asshole started sneaking around with her behind his back.
Brandy bit her bottom lip. “She’s mine. You don’t get to see her because you can’t control your temper.”
“She’s my child. Not his.”
Brandy shook her head. “No. She’s not. She’s Dane’s. You know that.”
“How do you even fucking know who her father is, you whore? You’ll fuck anyone, including that fucking show-off, who thinks he’s God’s gift to women. You’re nothing to him. He’s got a different girl in his bed every night. Everyone knows that.”
“He’s not that bad,” she defended the asshole.
“Are you in love with him?”
“He’s a good friend. He takes care of me and Kaley. All you do is make things worse.”
Rowdy took three steps toward her. She backed away. She was always trying to get away from him.
“Brandy!” her mother yelled from the stoop. “Come inside.”
“She’s not a child. She’ll be in when we’re done.”
“You’re done, Rowdy. Take one more step toward her, and I’m calling the cops.”
He glared at the old woman, noticing the phone in her hand. She’d do it. Wouldn’t be the first time he spent the night in the drunk tank.
“I want to see Kaley.”
“It’s after ten. She’s in bed,” Patty snapped. “You go on home now. Brandy, it’s been a long day. I could use your help with your father.”
“Yes, Mama.” Brandy held her hand out. “I need my phone.”
He slapped it into her hand but held onto her and the phone. “You mean nothing to him. I love you, Brandy. If you’d just give me a chance, I’d show you how good we could be together again.”
“Please, Rowdy. Let me go.”
“Never. You and Kaley are my girls.”
Brandy jerked her hand and phone from his. “No, we’re not.” She rushed to her mother.
“Yes, you are, Brandy,” he yelled as Brandy and her mother ran into the house. “I’ll never let you go. You’re my girls!”
B
ell walked into Dane’s room and stopped short when he looked up and smiled. Her heart actually stuttered. Damn the devil for giving him that too-charming grin. She felt the zap of it buzz through her and she tried to ignore it, as well as her instinctive need to smile back and hope the smile he gave every woman meant more when he smiled at her.
That was the problem with a guy like Dane. You’d never really know how he felt because he treated every woman the same. She didn’t want that. She didn’t want a relationship at all. They were messy. Complicated. Too much work and trouble. Right?
How would she know? She’d kept men at arm’s length her whole life. She never fit in at school, where everyone was so much older than her. She didn’t get people her own age because she’d been so far ahead of them in school. She didn’t fit anywhere, so she stayed on the outside, always looking in, analyzing everything people said and did. Always hiding who she really was because she wasn’t like any of them.
“Hey, honey, how was dinner with your sister last night?”
Case in point. She looked behind her, then back at Dane, one eyebrow raised. “Is one of your Dane’s Dames here? You can’t possibly still be calling me ‘honey.’ ”
“Uh, sorry, Doc. I didn’t mean anything by it.”
“Yeah, I know. You never mean it to any of them either.”
Funny, he actually looked sorry for saying it to her. She dropped the subject, worried she might have hurt his feelings. They’d had that talk about him changing his life. He’d meant it that he regretted his past. He’d had a lot of fun, but what had it really gotten him? Lonely lying in a hospital bed.
“Dinner was good. Who doesn’t love an all-you-can-eat buffet?”
“You. I’ve seen you walking around with your Greek yogurt, fruit, and salads. Look at you, the epitome of tone and fit. Runner? Swimmer?”
“Both.” Huh, the man paid attention
. Yes, to every woman.
“Figures. So I guess flowers and a huge box of chocolates wouldn’t be enough to say thank you for all you’ve done.”
“Isn’t that what you get a woman for Valentine’s Day?”
“I guess. I don’t do Valentine’s Day.”
“Right. That might mean something.”
“Exactly. See, you get me, Doc.”
Yeah, she got him. “While I like to live a healthy lifestyle, chocolate is a food group and should be enjoyed as often as possible.”
“Like sex.”
“Excuse me?”
“Well, it’s not a food group, but it should be enjoyed as often as possible.”
“Not in your condition. How are the ribs?”
“Trust me, honey, nothing would stop me from having sex. The ribs are sore, but manageable.”
She ignored the “honey.” The man couldn’t help himself. Still, she didn’t know what had gotten into him this morning. Was he trying to piss her off?
“The physical therapist said you did well on the crutches.”
“I zipped around the corridor and nurse’s station, no problem.”
She’d heard all the comments from the nurses about Dane’s good looks, hot body, and ever-ready smile. They recounted the woes everyone had over not being the one to give him a sponge bath last night. He’d actually asked for privacy and done it himself.
“Is Brandy going home with you today?”
“Why would she do that?”
“You’ll need someone to help you at home until you can move around better.”
“I’ll get by. My brothers and sisters will look out for me. My mom and dad will be there for a couple of days when I get home, but then they’re off to Paris for a couple of weeks.”
“Paris. Wow. I bet they’re excited.”
“Mom loves Ella’s apartment there. It’s their second trip.”
“Must be nice to have such a rich sister with an apartment in Paris.”
Dane shrugged. “I guess. She makes Gabe happy, and that’s all that matters.”
She didn’t expect that answer from him.
“So, Doc, are we out of here or what?” Dane leaned up, turned on the bed, and let his legs dangle over the edge. He sucked in a breath, trying to stave off the pain.
“What hurts?”
“Ribs. Leg. My back. Take your pick.”
“What’s your pain level?”
“Irritable and ready to go home.”
“So, like a six?”
“Seven.”
“When’s the last time you got your meds?” She flipped open his chart to look it up.
“Doc, come on. After five days, I want the hell out of here.”
“You didn’t have any pain meds this morning. Why?”
“They make me groggy. If I can’t get up and stand on my own, you won’t let me out of here.”
“Dane, that’s not true. Besides, you’re not leaving here on your feet. You’re leaving and staying in a wheelchair for at least a week while those bones and your torn muscles mend. I made that clear. The physical therapist made that clear.”
“I can’t sit around on my ass all day doing nothing.”
Clearly something else was bothering him. She cocked her head and studied him.
“Stop looking at me that way.”
“Tell me what it is.”
“What? It’s nothing. I want to go home.”
“Before, you weren’t ready to go home and start your new life. Now, you can’t wait. What’s changed?”
“Nothing. I’m tired. That’s all. How’s your head? Are you good?”
Again she studied him, trying to read whatever he didn’t want her to see. “I’m fine. But you’re not.”
“I want to go.”
“Not until you tell me what’s bothering you.”
“You. You’re bothering me. I can’t stop thinking about you.” He blurted out the words, then covered his face with both hands and scrubbed them over his face. His hands dropped to his lap, and he bent his head and spoke to the floor. “I can’t stop seeing that video in my head. You. The bull. He almost killed you.”
Drawn to his worry and concern, she put her hand over his and squeezed. “I’m okay. Nothing happened to me.”
“Nothing happened to you. Look at you, Bell.”
Her name came out soft and filled with such tenderness that tears stung the backs of her eyes. She blinked them back. He’d caught her off guard with his concern. That was all. It didn’t mean anything.
“Dane, really I’m fine. The stitches look bad, but they’re really nothing. Don’t worry about me. Concentrate on getting better.”
“I have the chance to get better because you risked your life to save me. Don’t think I forgot how much I owe you.”
“It’s done. Over. You don’t owe me anything. It’s my job. The reality of what’s happened to you is settling in. Given time, you’ll get better, and you won’t think about it so much.”
That’s all this was, his mind trying to deal with a traumatic event. His feelings and emotions rose to the surface now that he was able to process the events with a clear head.
“I will find a way to pay you back.”
She took her hand away. Too personal. Too close to feeling less like a doctor offering comfort and more like a friend consoling another. They weren’t friends. They’d just shared an experience that had been traumatic for both of them. Now, it was over, Dane was going home, and she’d go back to her mundane life.
“I’ll get your meds. You’ll need them to get through the flight. Do not get out of bed until the nurse comes with the wheelchair.” She looked over her shoulder when the door opened, and smiled at Gabe, Ella, Blake, and Gillian. “He’s all yours, guys. Cheer him up. He’s far too melancholy for a rodeo champ.”
Dane frowned at Dr. Bell’s back. He’d seen the look on her face when he’d called her honey on purpose just to get a rise out of her, and the way her face and eyes had gone soft when he’d called her Bell. He didn’t know why he did it. Something inside him wanted to see the real her. The one she didn’t hide from everyone, including her own sister. He’d seen her, the real her, just for a second when he’d said her name.
For the first time, a woman meant something to him. He only wished he could figure out why she meant something, and what that something was. Even when she was gone, he thought about her, wondered what she was doing, and when she’d be back. Anticipating her return nearly undid him last night and this morning. He needed to see her. Why? Reassurance that he was really okay? Nope. It ran deeper than that, and he didn’t want to dig deep. He wanted it to be something easy. Not complicated and complex, because that meant more changes. More responsibility. More permanent.
The need to make her see him as something more than the rambling rodeo cowboy, going from town to town and woman to woman, surged through him. He didn’t know how to get her to see him as someone different than that guy other than to actually be the guy he wanted her to see. But who the hell was that? He didn’t know, because right now he couldn’t see past getting out of this bed, out of this hospital, and back home. Doing all those things meant they’d go back to their lives and he’d be separated from her, and that was the last thing he wanted, which made him surly and do stupid things like call her honey just to get a rise out of her.
She messed with his mind. He wanted it to stop.
Was he focused on her because he didn’t want to face what came next? This next phase of his life, which he’d barely had time to actually plan past winning the championship and earning the money he needed and wanted for his future. He didn’t know what that future actually included or looked like.
“Missing your horse already,” Blake teased, slapping him on the shoulder and bringing him out of his tumultuous thoughts. “Not to worry, I’ve got all three of them and your truck downstairs.”
“What?”
“I’ll drive them back to Montana.”
“Shit. I didn’t even think about it.”
“Mind’s in a haze with all those painkillers,” Gillian said. “Don’t worry, Blake and Gabe made all the arrangements necessary for you to go home.”
“What do I owe you for the plane ticket?” Dane asked Gabe.
“Nothing. Ella took care of it. She chartered a flight for us.”
“Ella, no. I’ll take care of it.”
“It’s already done. No way could you sit on a commercial flight with your leg like that.” Ella pointed to the black brace.
He wiggled his tingling toes. The circulation coming and going with the swelling worried him. Dr. Bell assured him it would get better. Ice and time. The ice he didn’t mind. The length of time it would take him to get back to his old self did. He hated sitting around doing nothing. He felt useless. He needed to do something. Too much time to think had gotten him nowhere but stir-crazy.
“So, are you taking me back to Wolf Ranch to recover?”
“No. You’re going to your place,” Gabe said.
“My place? Mom and Dad’s place, you mean?”
“No, your place. Mom and Dad bought a three-bedroom house on a couple of acres on the outskirts of Crystal Creek. They moved into it this past week.”
“Wait. What? That’s not what we had planned.”
“Do you really want to live with your parents?” Gillian asked. “They planned to buy something in a couple of years but moved it up when the perfect property came up for sale.”
“Why?”
Gabe grabbed his shoulder. “Because, my whiny little brother, you were so reluctant to come home and run the place. Now that your options are limited, they wanted you to have the place to do what you want to do.”
“I don’t get it. I thought Dad wanted to make some of the improvements we talked about and do it together.”
“You don’t need Dad’s help with the ranch. He’s happy to turn it over to you,” Blake said.
“But what about you guys and Caleb? We’re supposed to split the land.”
“Why? Caleb is happy in Colorado with Summer and Lily. I’ve got Wolf Ranch,” Gabe said. “Blake has his place with Gillian and Justin at Three Peaks. We’re good, man. We’re happy. Of course, you’ll have to settle up with Mom and Dad on some of the expenses. They’re not letting you totally off the hook, but the ranch is yours. It’s what they want. It’s what Caleb, Blake, and I want for you. We want you home, man. Safe and sound with a fridge full of beer when we stop by.”
“Often,” Ella said.
“You’re the first on the babysitting list,” Gillian said, smoothing her hand over her still flat belly. “Justin wants to hang with his brother, too.”
Dane shook his head. He loved that kid. It made him smile every time the little guy told people they were brothers. He missed his family when he was out on the road. He both liked and hated hearing all the fun they had when they got together. He missed them. He missed being a part of their everyday lives. The last few times he’d taken over for Gabe at Wolf Ranch, he’d felt at home, satisfied with the work, but he’d wanted it to be his, not one of his brother’s. Not his parents’. He wanted his own. He never expected his parents to make it permanent and move out and buy another house, leaving him everything.
The thought made him pause and rethink his plans again. He wouldn’t be going back to living in his old room under his parents’ roof. The house was his. The business was his. Shit. That put a whole new spin on things. It’s what he wanted, but not what he’d originally thought—and fought against—for the last few years. This was the real deal. He’d be responsible. For everything.
His father and brothers no longer saw him as the kid they had to protect and help. Sometime in the last few years, they’d finally seen that he’d grown up and become a man, capable of taking care of himself and doing for himself. He’d always had their love, but now he felt he had earned their respect.
How the hell was he supposed to take over the ranch and house in his condition? With this chance and their confidence in him, he couldn’t fail now. Not when he hadn’t even begun.
He looked up at all their expectant faces, and it hit him. They’d help him. Like he’d always chipped in to help them. Not because they didn’t think he could do it but because they understood that when he could stand on his own two feet, he would.
“Bring Justin by anytime. He can be my gofer. Lord knows, I’m going to be practically immobile a while longer.”
“That’s right,” Dr. Bell said, his chart and a bag under her arm as she pushed a wheelchair into his room. “Ready to go?”
“More than ready.” Yeah, he couldn’t wait to get home to
his
place. The home he grew up in but would make his own now. The house and land right next door to hers.