Her Forever Cowboy (13 page)

 

“Game ball!” Norma Sue bellowed, holding up the ball that would win the game for Susan's team if Cole's team didn't hit Norma's serve.

Though she was a short, robust woman wearing boots, rolled-up jeans and a headband that had her kinky gray curls rivaling the look of Richard Simmons, the woman was deadly on a volleyball court. Cole hadn't expected the game to be this big a battle.

Across the net, Susan hunkered down into position and gave him the look—the one he'd come to realize in the past hour meant she was about to try to eat his lunch.

“Cole, better watch out,” Stanley called from the sidelines. “I'd be plumb embarrassed if she got two in a row past you.”

“Yep, yep,” Lacy yelled from over by the food. “You better dig deep, Cole Turner.”

Seth chuckled behind him and Esther Mae harrumphed beside him. “You can do this, Cole. If it comes my way this time, I'll get out of your way. I don't want you knocking me over again.”

Him
knock
her
over—Cole cut his gaze to her in
surprise and when he came back to Susan, her eyes were twinkling—that was good at least. She'd seemed to have difficulty gaining focus at the first of the game, but then she'd come out swinging and he'd been hard-pressed to defend his position at the net. She was excellent at spiking the ball and had several times nearly taken his head off when she'd leaped into the air and slammed the ball. He kept getting distracted watching her fluid grace.

Of course only now did he learn she'd put herself through vet school on a volleyball scholarship—a nice bit of info he'd somehow missed.

Norma Sue tossed the ball then slammed it, sending it skimming straight at him—he was well aware that it was a deliberate hit that would have him and Susan fighting at the net. He and Susan rose as one to block the other's shot at the same time. The next minute he felt wind by his ear as she drove the ball back past him straight into the ground.

He grinned as he landed. “Well done, Doc.”

She laughed. “Not so bad yourself, cowboy.”

“I think that means the loser buys the winner a soda,” he said as everyone swarmed about them in a flurry of congratulations and consolations.

She hesitated. “I guess it would be kind of sorry on my part as the winner if I turned down an offer like that.”

“You're right. After beating the socks off me, it would look pretty bad to tell me no. In fact, I think it should be lunch.” He was thinking of the date she'd canceled—the one they were supposed to be having now.

“So are you saying
yes?
” Cole asked, thinking he'd misunderstood, since she'd agreed so easily.

“Well, it's the sportsmanlike thing to do,” she said as she headed toward the group gathered around the tables.

Cole was quick on his feet. Moving as if he was dodging an angry bull, he shot out in front of her and blocked her path. “Oh, no, you don't. I just worked entirely too hard for this lunch date and I'm not looking to entertain a crowd anymore today.”

She studied him with slight mistrust in her eyes. “So what exactly do you have in mind?”

S
usan held on to Cole's waist and couldn't help but enjoy the feel of the sun on her face and the wind in her hair as they rode through the beautiful hillside. Riding with Cole on his motorcycle was the last place she'd expected to be…or wanted to be. Wasn't it?

She blinked against the wind and tightened her hold around his waist as they rounded a curve. Playing volleyball reminded her that she was moving to Mule Hollow to try to begin a new life. To try to
have
a life. Following volleyball with a motorcycle ride was a good way to start…Cole just might be right.

There had been much teasing and a flurry of excitement as Adela and Lacy threw together a sack lunch for them and hustled them on their way. It had been embarrassing.

As they headed toward his black-and-chrome Harley he'd smiled at her and made her smile when he told her that he'd enjoyed watching her have a good time, even if it was at his expense.

The man had a way about him—when he wasn't being a domineering oaf—that seriously drew her to him…dangerous thing to admit but it was true. He was so different from his brother Seth. Susan had thought at one point maybe she and Seth would have made a great couple. Seth was so settled and sure of his spot in life that they'd gotten along great from the moment she'd first begun working in this area and they'd become friends. He'd been in what she'd thought was a serious relationship and then when he'd broken that off, she was dating someone—of course that didn't work out. But when they both were single and she'd thought now was the time, he'd fallen for Melody. She'd been happy for him, but sad for herself. She'd not been able to help thinking that she might have missed out on the best man she'd ever known.

The man she could have trusted would never leave…but the first time she saw him and Melody, she knew they were meant for each other. There was a beautiful spark between them. That “thing,” that unspoken connection, that everyone around a man and a woman in love can see. She couldn't help but be thrilled for them.

At their wedding when Cole had walked in, she'd thought instantly, “Now, there is a man.”

He was nothing like his brother, oh, no. One look at Cole and she'd felt as though she was stepping out on a tightrope. With Seth she felt an easy feeling of comfort. Not anywhere near the tightening of her stomach, accelerated heartbeat and the we're-going-over-the-edge-of-the-cliff feeling she got when Cole was near…

That impression had solidified and done nothing but gather speed since he'd come home. Being around him was always like a roller-coaster ride. But it was all surface stuff.

So now here she was with the sun on her face and the wind in her hair as she took this step to get to know him better. She was terrified…her daddy had always told her fear was her best friend if it helped propel her forward. Susan had no idea if forward was good in this situation but forward she was determined to go.

She had to find out if this spark she felt when she was around him was what she feared it might be…

 

Energy filled Cole as he jogged down the old stone steps to where she stood on the large flat rock that jutted out into the water. The river swerved around the rock and rapids gurgled and swirled as the rock ledge on both sides of the area narrowed. Susan shielded her eyes and looked at him.

“I never knew this was back here,” she said, amazed. “Can you imagine what a welcome respite this must have been for those stagecoach passengers a hundred and fifty years ago when those stages rumbled to a stop at the house?”

He looked about thoughtfully, taking in the beauty and the timelessness of the place. “I've thought of it often. Actually as a kid I'd come here to this spot for respite myself. It's special.”

“I can see you here,” she said, her eyes sharpening with interest. “I bet you dreamed of all sorts of things.”

He tucked his hands in his pockets—the logical way of keeping them from reaching out to her. Which was suddenly exactly what he wanted to do, right here at his special spot. He'd never brought anyone here before. But he'd made the decision to share it with her the instant she'd agreed to have lunch with him.

He held up the plastic grocery bag Adela had handed to him before they'd left. “Are you ready to eat?”

“I can't believe they threw that together in the few moments we were telling them we were going for a ride.”

“Adela and Lacy are quick-handed women, is all I can say.” He led the way along the wide rock to where another ledge made a good place for them to sit. “As a kid, I pretended this was my thinking couch.”

She sat down with a space between them for the sack of food. Scooting back so her feet dangled, she leaned against the wall. “It reminds me of one. All we need are a few pillows to soften it up a bit.”

He nodded as he extracted two bottles of water, some turkey sandwiches and a large, half-full bag of chips from the sack.

“This looks good,” he said, his mind racing for an opening.

Susan nodded. “Can I ask you something?”

“Shoot away.” His interest spiked instantly by the hesitancy he heard in her voice.

“When you were sitting here, did you dream of settling down?”

There was his opening…as if God was telling him to open up like he'd wanted to do.

He laid a sandwich on the napkin Susan had just removed from the sack and placed in front of him. He steadied his thoughts. “I didn't. I dreamed of being a rodeo star and seeing the world. I brought my rope here and I practiced to the sound of the water rushing by.”

“That's kind of what I'd put together about you,” she said before taking a bite of her sandwich. She looked away, studying the water as it flowed past.

“But things change.”

“How so?”

“First, I never figured I was needed around here. I love this place, the land, the fact that it has been in our family all these years. I love coming home to it—”

“But you hardly
come
home. I mean, at least since I've bought the clinic and been doing work around here, you haven't been home much.”

He grinned. “Been keeping up with me even before you knew me. Impressive.”

“Yeah, you wish.” She laughed. “That
Seth
has mentioned you a time or two is the
only
reason I even knew you existed.”

“There's no need to be embarrassed. I'm sure my gals, Norma Sue and Esther Mae, have mentioned me to nearly all the single gals just like yourself. They're always looking out for a suitable match for their favorite prodigal son.”

She shook her head. “Hate to burst your bubble, but they never once mentioned you to me.”

He let out an exaggerated sigh. “And here I thought they were on pins and needles waiting for me to come home to roost.”

“Don't feel too bad. They've been busy with all the cowboys
already
living here.”

“This is true. Still, I'm wounded.”

“So—it wouldn't really matter. Right?”

“Actually, at the time I left it, it wouldn't have. The rodeo team at college was my ticket to see more of the world. I never meant to leave home forever. But my third year at school I met—” He had to pause as emotions slammed into him at the thought of meeting Lori.

Susan's gaze went still and she studied him with open curiosity. “Who?”

“A very special girl. Her name was Lori and she'd been on the team the year before I signed on.” After all this time it was just like yesterday. “She was an excellent barrel racer and sister to one of the ropers. And, well, she'd had to drop off the team due to a rare form of cancer. The team admired her and dedicated most of their rides to her so even though I'd not met her, she was there in spirit every time we went out.”

Susan placed her sandwich on her napkin and listened, unmoving. He studied her thoughtfully, her healthy glow and vitality so in contrast to Lori's sallow coloring when they'd met…“She came to the arena one day. She'd lived longer than the doctors expected her to and had beaten the odds, as some would say. She gave all the glory to God for every second she was alive. And she believed God had kept her alive for a reason—she was convinced of that and had been trying hard to figure out what it was that day when she walked into the arena.” Cole took a shaky breath, remembering that moment as if it was thirty minutes ago.

“She changed my life in ways I never thought possible. She was frail—so frail I thought she might need to sit down to catch her breath as she walked up the wheelchair ramp to the bleachers.”

“What happened? Did she make it?”

“Yes. She made it into the stands and sat on the bottom bleacher and watched the practice. I roped my calf, but when I went off my horse to tie his hooves she let out a whoop and I slid in the dirt and went down. I was laid out flat on my back in the dirt and heard her soft chuckle. For the first time in my life, I didn't care that I'd missed.” He smiled. “All I could think about was going over and meeting the girl I'd heard so much about.” He glanced at Susan and widened his smile…thinking about how hearing that rich laugh coming from such a fragile woman had affected him.

“She must have been a great gal?”

He shook himself out of his nostalgia. “That's all I could think, too. I mean when someone makes an impression like she had on so many, it gets a person's attention.”

“So what did you do?”

“I picked myself up, dusted myself off, walked over and…and, I gave her my heart.” He swallowed hard and caught the surprise in Susan's face. “Yeah, hard to believe, isn't it?”

“You fell in lov—” Her voice caught, which caught him off guard. “You fell in love?” she asked, her voice hushed.

“Like a rock.” He leaned elbows on knees and hung his head. “When I looked up through those arena bars into her eyes—so shadowed and hollow, but…extraor
dinarily full of life—I knew I would never be the same.” He wasn't exactly sure why he felt so compelled to open up to Susan about Lori but it felt good to talk to someone. Why her? Maybe it was so that she would stop and take less risk with herself. Not take her life or the quality of that life for granted.

“Was she recovering? In remission?”

“No.” He gave a slow head shake as he held Susan's startled gaze. Sure she was probably unable to believe he had the capacity for something like that—he hadn't known it himself. Feeling compassion for someone in that situation was one thing, falling in love in a heartbeat—some would say was crazy. And they had said it plenty. Pushing forward, he continued—details were hard. “We had three months. People called me crazy. Who would pursue someone who was dying? If I could, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. But I wouldn't change it for me. Lori was the best thing that ever happened to me.”

Susan's pain-filled eyes bored into him but she didn't say anything.

“She taught me what was important. Look, I've never told anyone all of this. I don't exactly know why I brought you here to tell you this, but I did. Life is precious. You should enjoy it and take care of yourself. There is more to life than your career. Don't take it all for granted.”

 

Susan's heart hammered with Cole's words. The man had fallen in love with a terminally ill woman—it was heartbreaking. “What did you do?”

He rubbed his knee, as he seemed to go back in time thinking. “I'd hurt my knee and was struggling competitively in my rodeo events. My dream was dying and it had been killing me. But after meeting Lori, it wasn't important anymore. I started seeing things in black-and-white in terms of importance. Which makes it even more difficult to handle what happened after she died…

“I shut down and for a while nothing was important to me, nothing at all. Thinking about those weeks now, I'm ashamed because I feel like I let her down. She'd wanted me to let her go easily. She'd been prepared to die. But even knowing this, there was no way—” His words died abruptly and he turned his head away from her.

Susan's heart broke for him. She wanted to comfort him, touch his shoulder, something, but she couldn't move.

“I couldn't understand how someone so wonderful had to go through so much,” he said, his words harder, his eyes flat when he turned back to her. “I still don't. It's a part of life I don't get.” He shook his head in distaste. “I didn't mean to get into that, that isn't why I started telling you this. I was just trying to let you know that you need to take care of yourself. Do more of this type of thing. Play volleyball, laugh. Hire an assistant who will be with you when you go out on call. You shouldn't be so stubborn about it.”

So that was what all of this was about—he slipped that assistant in there so smoothly. What exactly had she hoped it was about?

More.

The man had just given her a look inside his heart and
even said he didn't do that with many people. No one in town, other than Seth maybe, knew this side of him. She would have heard something about it…she remembered Norma Sue saying she thought something had happened to him, but she didn't know what. Now, Susan knew and she'd felt touched, even honored, that he would confide something so personal to her. He'd just described giving his heart to Lori in an unbelievable instant. He'd still stepped over that line and given his heart to her, knowing that he would suffer such a void after her death. But obviously he hadn't confided in her because he felt connected to her…