Her Bear In Mind (9 page)

Joe shifted back into human form and held her. He whispered over and over that it was going to be all right and stroked her hair as she screamed again.

With a curious itching sensation the wound on her stomach began to knit itself back together. Sierra felt the bones in her cheek melting together and hardening again. The icy feeling brought on by blood loss was long gone now. Instead she was sweating bullets, her body burning like a fever as it healed itself.

Sierra ran one shaking hand over the now smooth skin on her stomach.

Joe kissed her.

“I’ll buy you another desk.” he promised.

Epilogue

Joe and Sierra watched the last fleeting rays of the sun set over the blue green lake at the edge of the wood. They stood together, naked and holding hands.

“Are you ready for this?” he asked her.

Sierra nodded.

Together, they watched the full moon rise over the lake as her body began to shudder.

CHAPTER 8

It felt like electricity was crackling along her skin.

Sierra shivered involuntarily. The shudder started at the base of her spine, spread across her chest and shot down her arms and legs, right to the very tips of her fingers and toes. Her teeth chattered as if she were cold, and inexplicably, she thought of standing in the snow on a Christmas morning, at six years old clutching a mug of cocoa with the wind blowing against her pink cheeks, feeling colder than she ever had before but also full of excitement and wonder.

But all at once the feeling turned from cold to burning hot. The heat seared through her. It wasn’t in her skin, but in her bones, as if she were burning up from within.

For one brief moment, she thought that she might die.

Then Joe squeezed her hand. She looked up into his dark brown eyes. What she saw there was calm and reassurance. Without saying a word, those eyes told her that everything was going to be okay. She was safe, and she was loved, and Joe was going to be right there with her.

It was the last rational thought she had for several seconds.

That was the moment her bones began to change shape. Like hot metal hammered into shape by a blacksmith, her skeleton melted and reformed. The bones grew wider and longer. Joints changed shape. Her jaw molded and convulsed outwards.

Cinnamon brown fur dotted with white flecks was sprouting through her skin. It tickled gently as it pushed its way out. Sierra felt her teeth and nails lengthening and hardening. She watched in fascination as her nails changed to black, her red nail polish flecking off as they changed shape, but not disappearing completely.

She fell to her hands and knees on the forest ground, But she realized with a start that they weren’t hands or knees anymore. Her knees were not what hit the ground. Those were several inches higher. It was her paws that were planted on the ground. The large brown pads felt almost like shoes, cushioning her from the rough, pine needle-strewn ground. Sierra flexed her toes and felt her claws curl into the dirt, the sharp points curving in with ease.

Clumsily, she tried to turn her body and fell with an earth-shaking thump. She was reminded of her first job, working at Chick-fil-A at sixteen, and having to wear that oversized cow costume. It had felt top heavy and awkward, not knowing where the limits of her “body” started and ended.

Sierra wondered how long it would be before she stopped running into things.

“
You’ll get it
,” Joe’s voice resounded in her head.

He was trying to be reassuring, but instead Sierra jumped at the intruding voice, falling over again.

“
You can hear me?
” she thought at him.

“
Just in bear form, yes. It’s how we communicate.
”

Sierra, furious at not being warned, frantically tried to think of anything she didn’t want him to know, then cursed herself for that train of thought and instead tried
not
to think of those things. She settled on focusing intently on the tree in front of her, and tried valiantly not to let anything else push its way into her thoughts.

In her head, Joe was laughing at her.

“
I can teach you to guard your thoughts
,” he told her. “
You’ll get that with practice too. And then I won’t know about that night with your college roommate after all that tequila if you don’t want me to
.”

Sierra was going to kill him. She reached for a sound like a sigh or a grumble to express that frustration and instead found herself letting out a roar that echoed off the trees. Startled, she forgot how mad she was for a moment and instead marveled at what she had become.

She could smell
everything,
from the sharp pine scent of the trees to the musky scent Joe was giving off. Even the lake in front of her had a smell. It was kind of like the smell of falling rain, but stronger, more distinct.

Sierra took a few tentative steps forward, conscientious of the weight each step carried. A few more steps, and then impulsively she broke into a run. She was moving faster and with more reckless abandon than she ever had in her life. It felt like flying. Tree branches whipped her as she ran past, but with her thick fur protecting her they felt no more painful than running through clothes hanging on a line.

She stumbled over her new limbs, fell, then climbed up again. She tried standing up, rearing up eight feet in the air, and brought her claws down on a nearby tree. She ripped into it, the bark giving way like tissue paper. The assault on the tree startled the owls nesting inside, sending them scattering into the air with disgruntled screeches.

The owls. The owls smelled
so good
. She could smell their hot blood and their tiny beating hearts and was disturbed to find herself longing to sink her teeth into one.

“
It all right
,” Joe projected to her, and this time she felt reassured by his presence instead of unnerved by it. “
You’re not a monster. You’re just hungry. But you’re never going to catch an owl. Let’s start with something easy
.”

*

Sierra smelled it long before she saw it. The deer smelled like grass and fresh turned soil. Beneath that was the warm, metallic smell of blood. Leaves crunched beneath her paws as she tried to approach the deer slowly, not wanting to scare it.

Finally the deer came into her line of vision from between two trees. It was at the edge of a clearing, bending down to nibble on the bright green weeds growing near the base of a tree. Before she could get any closer, the deer’s head shot up. It could smell her too. The deer’s wide brown eyes met hers and froze there for a moment before it bolted into the woods. Sierra tore after it, letting out a roar that startled every animal in a fifty-foot radius out of its hiding place.

Deaf to the scuffle she had caused, Sierra continued in her single-minded pursuit of the deer. She chased it out of the clearing and through the dense trees. It was
fast
, but not as fast as she was. Trees flashed by as she began to gain on the deer. She realized with no small amount of frustration that while she was faster, the slim frame of the deer was much better able to slip through the trees. It dove through a narrow gap and Sierra tried in vain to follow, and instead slammed her body into the unyielding tree trunks.

The shock reverberated through her body. Black spots floated across her vision and she crashed to the ground on her back, feeling less like a fearsome black bear and more like a upside down turtle.

As she blinked to clear her vision, she realized Joe was laughing at her again. Sierra resolved to bite him if she could ever get up again. He approached from behind her, out of her line of vision. As he did, his laugher changed from ringing inside her head to his familiar, deep chuckle from human vocal cords. Joe knelt on the grass next to her head. His deep brown eyes swam into view.

“Are you alright?” he asked her.

Sierra grunted in response, feeling more embarrassed than actually hurt. Joe stroked the fur around her head.

“You know, you’ve single handedly scared away every bit of game for ten miles at least with that racket? I hope you weren’t too hungry.”

She
had
been hungry. Sierra marveled at her own disappointment. Was this really her? Chasing down prey in bloodthirsty pursuit? She wore suits and high heels, and destroyed people or built them up with words. All her aggression was wielded at the world from a keyboard. Now she was this other thing. Powerful and dangerous. Capable of great feats of strength and violence. How could she reconcile this with the person she had been before? Was she the same person at all?

Joe was still staring into her eyes. Perhaps sensing her distress, he had stopped laughing. Infuriating though he could be, there was nothing but love and reassurance in those eyes. He continued to run his fingers gently through her fur. Sierra lost herself in the sensation, and allowed it to comfort her.

“It’s like throwing a switch in your head.” Joe told her. “If you want to change back, just tell your body that’s what you want to do.”

Sierra only hoped it would be so easy. She tried to focus her thoughts on changing back.

“
Go on
.” she told her brain. “
Change. Shift. Let’s not be a bear anymore
.”

Nothing.

“Picture your body,” Joe instructed her. “Imagine how your hair feels on your shoulders. Remember your long legs. Soft pink lips. Full breasts.”

Joe smiled at her wickedly, and now Sierra was imagining her body. She was remembering what that body felt like this morning when it was naked and wrapped up in Joe’s. Her “long legs” had been wrapped around him as he had taken her on top of his desk. She’d run her hands through the dark hair on his chest as he moved in her. The pictures on the office walls had rattled.

They managed to get dressed in a hurry and had their clothes back on and hair smoothed out just moments before his secretary returned from lunch.

As she remembered the way Joe made her body feel, it started to change again, starting that electric crackle, like before, only this time instead of expanding she felt her body contract. Her bones shrunk down. The fur receded back into her body, leaving smooth, naked skin behind that prickled against the pine needles she was laying on. Joe’s hands continued to stroke her fur, until it wasn’t fur anymore, but her long blonde hair. Sierra lay on the ground shaking, with her head in his lap.

Joe leaned over and kissed her lips upside down, his teeth gently nibbling on her lower lip. Still, thinking about this morning, Sierra rolled over and climbed into his lap, straddling him, feeling the heat from his now erect cock pressing into her abdomen.

“How do you feel?” he whispered into her ear.

“Powerful.” she responded, and pushed him to the ground.

*

Afterwards, they lay naked together for a long time, watching the stars and holding each other. Joe rested his head against Sierra’s breast, his beard tickling her skin. The woods were quiet around them, save for the gentle chirp of crickets, and all but lost in shadow. Only the moon illuminated their silhouettes.

Sierra shivered against the night air and pulled her body closer to his.

“Are you cold?” Joe asked her.

“I could use some clothes,” Sierra admitted. “Do you know that way back to the car?”

“I know something else that could warm you up.” .

Sierra laughed.

“Again?” she asked.

“No,” Joe said. “Well, unless you want to. But I was going to suggest you shift again. Maybe some of the game has come wandering back by now.”

The shift was easier this time. Sierra suspected with a note of disquiet that it was simpler to go from human to bear than the other way around.

“
Depends
,” Joe’s thoughts answered hers. “
The closer it is to the full moon, the more natural it feels to be in bear form. The other half of the cycle, it feels more like you should be human. It took me months before I could shift at all during the new moon
.”

They went slower this time, sniffing out the ideal prey. Joe guided her towards a deer trail, showing her how to follow the scent, and move slowly so as not to alert their prey.

Joe padded through the woods with such grace. His movements were fluid, his steps barely making a sound. Sierra wondered how long it would be before she reached that point herself. Her body still felt alien to her, like it didn’t quite fit.

From between the trees, they eyed the two grazing deer. Joe advised her to stay still until they were ready.

“
You have to move fast,”
he advised her. “
The easiest way is the catch them off guard. Lunge, and don’t even give them a chance to run
.”

Sierra readied herself, salivating over the smell of the deer.

“
There’s no need to take down both. Aim for the one on the right. Go on three. One…two…
”

Joe suddenly froze as if startled. He sniffed the air.

“
What’s wrong?
” Sierra projected at him.

She felt a wall close off in Joe’s mind, blocking his thoughts from her. Before he did it, she caught one word.

“
Strangers.
” he had thought. And with the word was a feeling. One of suspicion, and worry, and behind that was fear, mostly for her.

“
What’s going on?
” she wanted to know.

“
Nothing
.” Joe projected, and she realized he could do the politician bull shit voice even with just his thoughts. “
I thought I smelled someone, but there’s nothing there.
”