Her Bah Humbug Bear (A BBW Paranormal Holiday Romance) (6 page)

“Don’t start something you can’t finish, baby.”

“Ohh, a challenge from the big, bad—Bah Humbug—bear.”

“Bah Humbug, hey?” Dirk chuckled, surprising them both with the sound. His laughter choked into a gasp when she sat up in bed, throwing back the cover. The sudden change in temperature didn’t affect him. In. Any. Way. His cock was still hard. Rock hard. She licked her lips, staring down at him. She tucked a strand of dark hair behind the enticing shell of her ear.

His gaze took her in. Her shoulders, white and creamy in the morning light. Her breasts—his bear growled as her breasts rose and fell, pushed together by her arms as she knelt beside him, gorgeous and naked. Ready to take.

He lifted his hand to pull her on top of him, needing the feel of her wet flesh closing around him. She smiled at him, dodging his hold. Smiling at him defiantly, she flipped her hair behind her shoulder and took hold of his length, squeezing it against the palm of her hand. Her smile was more beautiful than sunshine. She pumped his cock in her hand as she slowly lowered her head.

Suddenly, he couldn’t draw a deep breath, the air having left the room as her mouth closed around the mushroom head of his dick. Still holding his gaze, he felt the rough texture of her tongue stroking across the slit. She hummed as if she loved the salty taste of his precum. He felt his body quickly producing more.

He lifted his hips and she took more of him in her warm, waiting mouth. She closed her eyes as she swallowed his length, stopping only when he bumped the back of her throat. Lifting her head, she let him slide almost free before taking him deep again. The pace she set was agonizingly slow, but oh, so sensuous. A part of him, his bear, wanted to thrust his hips high and hard, forcing her to take him down her throat. The other part of him, the part savoring this time with her, wanted the sensation of her sucking his cock to never end. In compromise to his warring needs, he threaded his fingers through her hair. “A little more, baby. Please, just a little more.” He applied gentle pressure to the back of her head, helping her take more of him on the next deep stroke.

“Yeah, just like that.” He closed his eyes and held her head to him, taking her mouth in small, short strokes. “Just. Like. That.” The sensations overcame him and the next thing he knew he was shouting as he came, his cum spurting down her throat.

When he came back to his senses, he realized what he had done. “Damn, Mercy, I didn’t mean to—”

His words stopped abruptly when he looked down at her, her mouth still moving slowly up and down his length. Even with the amazing release, he’d lost little of his hardness. Her hand pumped the bass for several more moments before she lifted her head, kneeling back beside him, smiling and licking her lips as if she’d just finished her favorite treat.

With a low roar of his bear, he pulled her on top of him. He swept warm lips across hers, tasting himself on her lips. Wanting more, he thrust his tongue inside her mouth, exploring, discovering. He ran his tongue over her teeth, stroked the insides of her cheeks, and tasted what only a lover ever would. As their tongues tangled, he could feel himself falling, falling down that path he’d vowed he would never take.

Ours. Mate. Ours.
The roar grew inside his head, filled his heart and set his body on fire.

Mine.
She was his.

Dirk’s fingers dug into Mercy’s hips as he pushed her down his body. They both groaned as her pussy rubbed across his cock, calling it to full attention. She grabbed his shoulders and pulled, hoping he’d take the hint and roll over, putting him on top. Instead, with a move that belied her weight and did not do justice to his strength, he sat up, the headboard against his back, her center pressed against his groin.

He pulled her forward and their bodies ground against each other again, making her hands grab his shoulders in support this time. “Ride me, baby.”

Mercy ducked her head, hoping the fall of her hair would hide the color flooding her face. She bit her lip. Instinctively, she wanted to move her hips, find the tip of his cock and slide down it. But, inhibitions being what they were—pesky little buggers that came back even after you’d chased them away—she found herself shying away from having sex in this position. It was just too… too everything.

“Mercy?” A large hand came into her line of vision and then her hair was swept away revealing her face. “Talk to me.”

She sighed. “This isn’t, exactly, my favorite position. Can’t we do it like we did before?” She finally raised her gaze, meeting the darkness of his. Somehow she’d expected anger, or at least, frustration, as she refused to go along with what he wanted. Instead she found a warmth that had her melting against him yet again.

“Why isn’t it?” His hands fell back to her hips, holding her lightly. She knew if she wanted to, she could move away from him. That wasn’t want she wanted. She wanted to make love to him again. Wanted to feel his cock inside her, stretching her. She wanted him to fuck her. Just not like this.

“Please, Dirk, can’t we—”

“No, we can’t. Not until you tell me why.” And there was that bossy bear she’d been expecting.

“Okay.” She let go of the muscled hardness of his shoulders and crossed her arms over her breasts. “This position reveals to much of me. Too much of my stomach, the rolls of flesh other women don’t have. Happy now?” She made to get off him, but his hands tightened.

“Let me go, Dirk.” Fun time was over. Her frustration, her anger at herself, was mounting inside her.

“No.” he moved, sitting up straighter against the headboard. She felt his legs move until they were a thick wall behind her, supporting her back. The move forced them closer, their faces almost touching. She hadn’t uncrossed her arms and they pressed against his chest, the only thing preventing that delicious one on one contact between her nipples and the soft mat of hair spread across his pecs.

With gentle hands he unfolded her arms, pressing them once again on his shoulders. Next, he leaned forward and licked her nipples. His hands still held her close, still prevented her from moving away. As his mouth closed around one of her breasts, she let her head fall back on her neck, offering herself to him. “Oh, Dirk,” she whispered.

A large hand moved to spread across her back, pushing her forward, his mouth still working her breasts, first one then the other. Before she knew it, he was urging her to her knees, her body poised above his. “Take me, Mercy. Take me deep inside.”

They stared at each other as she contemplated obeying his order. For it wasn’t a request. It was almost a desperate plea, she thought, seeing the fire burning deep inside him. The lust stamped across his face.

“Do it.” This time the words were growled and Mercy shivered, hearing the animal that was so much a part of him.

Still looking into his eyes, she reached between their bodies and encircled his thick length with her hand. She had to straighten a little more he was so long. Then, her pussy was above the head of his cock. She could feel her juices slowly leaving her body, wetting her curls, soon to ease the entrance of his body into hers. She nestled the head against her throbbing flesh and braced her hands against his shoulders once he was secure. It took no effort at all for the head to slide inside her. That first feeling of being stretched made her gasp in delight. Closing her eyes, she let go of her control and allowed her body to sink further down, taking in another inch, then another, then another, moaning as he filled her.

“Look at me, Mercy.”

She shook her head. She couldn’t. This was too intimate. If she saw him, she knew what he would see in her eyes. Desire, want, need. Love. If she opened her eyes now, he would know that she loved him.

“Mercy.” Another low growl and her body was accepting more of him without her conscious decision. It was as if it knew she was his, and his alone. She raised up again, unable to stand the sensation of him inside her for a moment. She rose on her knees until only the head of his cock was inside.

“Mercy.”

This time she did obey his unspoken command. She opened her eyes, looking straight at him as she lowered herself to him, taking him deep, so deep. So—then he was in control, thrusting his hips up, impaling her with his cock. She cried out at the pressure, the pleasure.

“Oh god, Dirk, oh god,” she chanted as he held her hips in a bruise forming grip, pushing her down as he thrust up. Mercy felt her breasts bounce, her stomach jiggle, but she didn’t care. She didn’t care about anything but the delicious hardness inside her. Leaning forward she changed the angle of their mating, finding that perfect spot where his pelvic bone rubbed against her clit with each downward stroke.

Soon she was seeing bright lights behind her eyes and crying out her release, holding on to him for dear life. Before the pleasure even begun to ebb away, the world spun around as he flipped them over, then flipped her again so she was lying on her stomach, his huge body behind her. He didn’t even let her catch her breath before he was plunging inside her from behind, his cock stretching her, pounding so hard, so deep that her womb wanted to open up and suck him in.

Heavens, help her, her body felt as if it wanted to accept the very essence of his being. His seed. His child. Her hands clutched the covers and she tried to raise her hips, mayhap to throw him off, she didn’t know. All he knew was she couldn’t breathe, couldn’t…

Then she was coming, coming until she cried, coming until her body collapsed. And yet he still pounded inside her.

“Dirk,” she gasped, not knowing if she could take anything else. As soon s the words formed, she felt the sting of pain where her neck met her shoulder. Felt the bite as his fangs punctured her skin, then sank into her flesh. Just as his cock was sinking into her pussy.

Plunge after plunge. Sip after sip.

With a roar he came and she felt his hot seed spill inside her, leaving behind warmth and promise. Her surroundings faded as she allowed the darkness creeping in around the edges of her consciousness to take over. She felt him pull away and whimpered at the sting of her flesh. In the morning she’d thought she remembered the warm cloth passing between her legs as he took care of her. And, the heat from his body as he pulled her close. She smiled at the hard length pressing against the cheeks of her ass. She gave up the battle to stay conscious and allowed sleep to overtake her.

“YOU NEED TO leave.”

“What?” Mercy and Dirk sat in his living room, side by side on the couch, watching the roaring fire he’d made not an hour before. He had woken her at sunrise, his face between her legs, his tongue caressing her in long, loving licks as he aroused her for his taking.

“You need to leave. Before this storm gets any worse.” He got up and went to the bank of windows.

“But…” Granted she had absolutely no experienced when it came to morning afters, but she was pretty sure it shouldn’t be quite so abrupt. She sat up straight, holding the cover they’d use to ward off the morning chill as the fireplace had slowly heated the space against her chest. He’d given her a large, oversized t-shirt to wear as they’d eaten breakfast. Yes, he’d become distant as soon as they’d left his bedroom, but she’d chalked that up to his personality. Not a morning person, she got that. She wasn’t either, so the companionable silence they shared as they’d eaten the pancakes he’d fixed had been fine with her.

“I’m sure you need to be able to get to work tomorrow.” The sky had been clear when they’d gotten up, now, she saw the heavy fall of snow. If she listened closely she could even hear the tiny crystals of ice pinging against the thick glass of the windows. Not the best of conditions to be out in.

But to be snowed in with a bear. Not such a bad proposition. Unless, the bear didn’t want her.

Which was apparently the case with Dirk.

She felt the back of her eyes well with tears. What had happened? Where had the loving, almost happy man, she’d had in her bed last night disappear to? Touching the place on her neck where he’d bit, she wondered what that had been about. Kinky bedroom play? For a moment, seeing the pinkened skin in the bathroom mirror this morning she’d had a brief moment of hope that he’d claimed her. But mate marks were scars that never faded. Not a hickey given in the heat of the moment.

“You’re right. I should be going.” With as much dignity and grace as she could muster, she gathered the quilt around her and padded down the hallway toward his bedroom. He didn’t try to stop her. At least she’d had a shower this morning she thought as she pulled on her clothes from the day before. Zipping up her boots, she found her coat neatly folded over the back of a chair at the side of the room.

As she walked back out into the living room, he was still standing where she’d left him, his back to her. Shutting her out.

He must have heard her return and turned around, his gaze searching hers. She knew what he saw—confusion, hurt, and disillusionment even though she was a big girl and knew how the world worked. She’d thought… she’d hoped… She mentally shook her head, forcing away the tears. Time enough for those later. She’d had her Christmas wish come true. She’d been held in the arms of a man who wanted her, truly wanted her, however briefly. Some of the things they’d shared last night couldn’t have been faked, not even by the best player around.

If, she’d expected more, she couldn’t fault fate. Fate was, well, fate.

“I’ll get dressed and follow you down.” He stood with his arms to his sides, the expression on his face impossible to read except for a brief moment when he’d first turned around and saw her standing there, her coat and shoes on, ready to leave. Whatever the emotion had been, he’d quickly shut it down.

Gathering her feelings for him like a cloak of protection, she walked toward him, stopping when she was only inches away, unable to leave until she said one more thing. “No one will judge you, Dirk. You’re allowed to move on.” They both knew she was talking about his family. He’d shared some of that awful time with her. The death of his parents and sisters. The hunt for the wolves. Oh, she’d realized quickly he hadn’t shared all of the details, the details that he thought made him unlovable. Undeserving. But he’d shared enough to make her hope he had finally started to heal.

He started to shake his head and she placed her hand against his jaw. “Yes, you are. Do you honestly think your family would want you to forsake your future?”

“You don’t understand.”

“Yes, I do. I understand you’ve locked yourself away from all feeling because you can’t stand the ache inside when you allow yourself to feel. I’m all alone, too, Dirk. My heart aches everyday for love.”

“Mercy.”

She wanted to take the grief from his voice, the emptiness from his words, the loneliness from his soul. Despite the grumpy, Bah Humbug attitude he exhibited, the negative emotions didn’t suit him. She had felt the passion he had for her, had thought she’d felt the first soft tendrils of love for her last night.

She knew she loved her bear. A sob almost escaped her. Her bear. Her Bah Humbug bear. How fitting that she’d fallen in love with a man who didn’t enjoy Christmas anymore when she was just now getting the opportunity to experience the season. She let her hand drop to her side and slid it inside her coat pocket to hide its trembling. “It’s your decision. Just know that I do love you with all my heart and soul.”

She couldn’t even choke out a goodbye so she hurried to the door, closing it quietly behind her. She saw the cake she’d brought yesterday still in its container, sitting so innocently on the rocker. She wanted to laugh. Her desire to show her appreciation to the man had somehow morphed into the most incredible night of her life. She hurried to her car, barely taking the time to knock off the snow that had gathered on her windshield. She certainly didn’t take the time to allow it to defrost properly. Luckily the snow had only just now started and she was able to start the car and go.

Looking in her side view mirror, she saw him standing on the porch, his arms crossed and that perpetual frown on his face. Her bear, she thought sadly, her Bah Humbug bear was going to have a lonely Christmas, too.

Dirk’s bear clawed inside him, demanding that he shift and follow Mercy into town. Not to ensure that she made it back down the mountain safely—which was what the man knew that he should do—but to chase her, capture her, and bring her back to the cabin. His bear set up a roar inside him that tore through his heart and soul.

Mate.

The side of his face still burned from her touch. He knew what she’d seen as she searched his face. An angry bear. A man unwilling to let go of the past. He couldn’t, Dirk assured himself, even though it felt as if his heart was shattering inside his chest. He had nothing to offer her. Inside he was as icy and cold as the snowy winter around him.

His emotions had withered up and died the day he had failed to protect his family. The day they had died because of him. Him. No one else but him. Turning, he walked back into the house, even though he wanted to shift and run into the forest, allow the solitude to engulf him. He knew if he gave into his animal, the animal would follow the woman who held their heart. The animal, just seconds before roaring in aggression, deflated as the red of her taillights faded, realizing the man would not be going after their mate

Grabbing a shirt by the door, he pulled on his boots and went out into the cold again, heading toward the small shop he’d built behind the cabin. He’d taken up woodcarving as a way to calm his racing thoughts and ease his tattered soul. Much to his surprise, he had exhibited a natural aptitude for carving. Maybe it was the animal inside him, but Dirk could take a piece of wood, large or small, and see the shape he was meant to create. From large, exquisite wooden murals, to the simplest of Christmas ornaments. That was what he was concentrating on now. Ornaments that could be sold in the gift center Marcus was planning on opening next year.

Next year.

If he was even here next year. What
would
he do if Mercy found someone else? Married him? Had cubs? His bear went wild at the thought and Dirk had to use all his restraint to wrangle the bear into submission.

He picked up the piece of wood he’d been working on. A rough outline of a tree branch with three Christmas cardinals perched on top was clearly visible. It didn’t take Dirk long to create these types of sculptures.

As he worked, he blanked out his mind. Or tried to. Tried to forget the feel of Mercy’s soft lips beneath his. Tried to forget her sweet taste.

“Fuck.” He cursed as he sliced through the meat of his thumb, having pressed too hard. He wiped the blood on his jeans, watching as the cut virtually healed up before his eyes.

And there was the reason why he was reluctant—
fucking stubborn, his bear insisted—
reluctant to take, hell, even acknowledge the possibility of Mercy being his mate.

If he couldn’t protect his family—a family of bear shifters, for fuck’s sake—how could he possibly expect to keep Mercy from harm.

Especially when he was the one more apt to harm her than anyone else in the world.

Cold air rushed toward him as the outside door opened. He didn’t need to look up to see who had entered his domain. Marcus. The damn bear didn’t know personal boundaries. No doubt he had seen Mercy’s car leave the mountain—after staying the night. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Okay.” The heavy threads of the man’s winter boots sounded across the concrete floor.  Dirk had put a lot of effort into building the cabin and the workshop, thinking Marcus could use it as a rental cabin when he left. The land still belonged to the other bear and most of the materials he’d used had come from the forest surrounding the cabin.

Building it had given him something to do. Something to live for.

His thoughts immediately flew to Mercy. She was something he needed to live for.

“This is good work, Dirk. It should make you a tidy sum in the gift shop next year.” Marcus picked up the cardinal carving then put it down. He went on to touch other ornaments Dirk had completed in the last month. Squirrels, deer, wolves. He had yet to do a bear, thinking that might just be a little too personal. Dirk didn’t want some stranger having a likeness of him in his bear form hanging on their Christmas tree year after year.

“I’ll drop them off before I leave.” There was no way he could stay here now, he’d realized. Marcus had been correct the other day. He couldn’t bear to be in the same town as Mercy if she found another man to love. Became the mother of children who weren’t his.

“Leave? You going somewhere?” Marcus sat down on the empty stool beside him.

“Yeah. I’m leaving Riverton.”

“What brought this decision about? Mercy wanting to spread her wings a little? I can’t blame her; her aunt wasn’t a very impulsive person.”

A grunt from Dirk was the only response he got and it made the bigger bear chuff. “Listen to me, asshole. I’m trying to tell you something here.”

Dirk finally looked up, his eyes blazing. “What? That Mercy’s too good for me? That she deserves more than a damaged bear? Believe me, I know that already.”
And it’s tearing me apart inside,
he thought in anguish.

“No, you idiot. I’m trying to tell you that Mercy coming here
wasn’t
an impulsive decision on her part. She knew exactly what she was doing when she let you fuck her.”

Dirk roared as he tackled the other male, knocking him off the stool and throwing a punch before Marcus knew what was happening. In seconds, the two men were grunting and groaning as punches were thrown fast and furious. Even though Marcus outweighed Dirk, Dirk’s bear was closer to the surface, making him a much less civilized fighter.

After a few moments, Dirk backed off. He stood in silence, his breathing heavy, blood streaming from cuts on his face and hands, his body already aching from the force of the other bear’s fists.

Marcus had fared much better than the younger man despite Dirk’s dirty fighting. He wiped the blood from the corner of his mouth, looking at Dirk with sympathy in his eyes. “And here I thought Jagger was the town’s fool for not claiming his mate. I see you’re trying to give him a run for his money.”

“She’s not my mate.”

Marcus threw back his head and roared with laughter. “You are so delusional man. Of course she’s your mate.”

Dirk dropped back down on his metal stool, defeated. “She can’t be my mate. I can’t take care of her, protect her.”

“Dirk, that’s not all a good mate does. A good mate does provide for his woman. A good mate does protect her—when he can. But the most important thing a good mate can do is love her. Take it from someone who knows—fate would not have given her to you if you didn’t deserve her.”

Dirk wiped the blood from his hands and picked up another piece of pine when Marcus left. The older bear had given him a lot to think about. With a careful hand he started on another carving, his bear lending its spirit and magic. In just a few hours, a beautiful wooden Christmas ornament sat in the palm of Dirk’s calloused hand. When he looked at it, he felt a sense of peace wash over him. In his mind, he remembered the last Christmas he had shared with his parents and sisters. They had been a happy family, a loving family. He’d somehow forgotten that in the intervening years.

That’s what he wanted, what he needed.

Taking a sheet of tissue paper from his workbench, he wrapped the ornament carefully.

Maybe, just maybe, with a little Christmas luck, and a whole lot of love, he would have that again.

****

“What the hell did you think you are doing?”

Mercy startled at the rough voice behind her, almost losing her balance on the stepladder she was using to reshelve books. She grabbed hold of the metal shelf before her as she swung around to face her visitor. Dirk. He looked as if he’d come straight from the forest, or more likely, straight from the acres of Christmas trees he helped to cut and process. He smelled of pine and freshly fallen snow. Instantly, her body heated for him, remembering the feel of him against hers as they’d made love.