Authors: Jay Bell
“R a finally came to his senses and abandoned these fools,” S et interrupted, “and they feel that replacing him with a clown will bring R a back rather than alienate him further.”
“The gesture is one of reverence and respect,” Horus shot back, “although maybe R a would prefer a sacrifice. I , for one, would revel in the sight of your foul head bleeding on an altar.”
“And you would be the one to cut it off, no doubt,” S et growled. “You’ll find your visage plucked of every feather and roasting over a flame before you lay a hand on me!”
V iolent energy crackled around them as the gods argued, a prickling penetrating sensation that J ohn imagined radiation would feel like. O ne by one the other gods joined in the shouting as they each took sides. S oon the air felt on the verge of exploding. B olo whimpered and Dante hit the ground. R immon threw his arms around J ohn to shield him from the coming war between gods. Then the voice of Osiris rose above all else.
“Take it to the astral heavens, or may Ra curse you both!” And just like that, it was over. B oth S et and Horus disappeared, and reality was no longer in danger of tearing at the seams. The only remaining evidence of conflict was an ominous rumble of thunder in the distance, caused by the two gods continuing to battle elsewhere.
“Talk about a dysfunctional family,” Dante said as he stood. “Papa’s run off, and the kids are duking it out in the backyard.”
The E gyptian gods hissed and glared in response to Dante’s words, but he was right.
Another pantheon was in turmoil because they had lost their leader. The pa ern was now undeniable. I n each realm they were sent to, the chief deity had gone missing, leaving the remaining gods disorganized if not desperate.
This couldn’t be a coincidence. I f anyone stood to benefit from the resulting confusion, it was the M inisters of O rder. How they had caused each realm’s leader to disappear was still a mystery, but this tactic was a grave miscalculation. W ith the leaders gone, recruiting the desperate pantheons to Hell’s side was even easier.
J ohn’s stomach sank. O f course, Hell could be behind all of this. J ohn couldn’t deny the existence of the glass men, but for all he knew they could be some sort of demon.
M aybe Hell had kidnapped the leaders and sent the glass men to cause panic, blaming it all on Heaven.
“I am greatly embarrassed by Horus’s and S et’s behavior,” Thoth said to R immon.
“At least they have made clear that these are difficult times for us. We understand that we are not alone in this situation, which brings us to your war.” And just like that, they were playing into Hell’s hands. John had to say something.
“J oining Hell in a war against P urgatory, possibly even Heaven, won’t do anything to bring R a back. M aybe we should focus on discovering the truth behind R a’s disappearance. He could have been taken against his will.” The laughter of the other gods was unanimous, except for Thoth, who was thoughtful. J ohn supposed he was being foolish, since he had seen R a free and rolling through the underground, but that didn’t mean some magic wasn’t keeping him from returning home. Perhaps the Egyptian gods were too confident in Ra’s invulnerability.
“O ur reasons for joining this war may differ from your own,” Thoth said, “or they may very well be the same. B efore discussing our own desires, we invite you to see what we can offer you. I f you leave here, you will find the Nile on the other side of the S phinx quartet. Following it downriver will bring you to the pyramid of jade. We shall await you there.”
And with that, the gods disappeared from the chamber, leaving the companions alone, except for the beautiful goddess I sis, wife of O siris. This mistress of magic directed them to the entrance they had come through, but when following her they found the long halls and public areas were gone. They were outside almost instantly.
The goddess bid them farewell, her colors taking on those of her surroundings, before she faded into the background and disappeared entirely.
“S omething’s fishy,” Dante said. “I f they had something to show us at the jade pyramid, then why bring us here in the first place?”
“To meet the pharaoh?” John suggested.
“O r maybe he insisted on meeting us,” Dante replied. “O therwise I think they would have preferred to keep him out of sight.”
“R egardless,” R immon interjected, “they could have brought us instantly to our destination with their magic, if they so desired. Unless I ’m mistaken, they want us to see more of their realm. I suggest we take our time and enjoy the sights.” This was an easy idea to embrace. The grass was so soft that J ohn took off his shoes as they strolled. Despite the evening hour, people were everywhere, calling out to each other, chasing their children, or lying as lovers together beneath the stars. A group of old women sat in a circle next to a cylindrical clay oven and gossiped as they pounded dough into flat discs. O ne flashed them a toothless grin before downing what resembled beer out of a worn mug.
“First time I’ve seen old people since Purgatory,” Dante commented.
J ohn smiled. “An ex-boyfriend of mine used to say that everyone was twenty-one in Heaven.”
“He wasn’t far from the truth,” R immon said. “O nly in the beginning does the mind cling to the former physical self. As time goes by, the silent wishes of the heart come true. ‘I wish I didn’t have this paunch on my stomach,’ or ‘I wish my hair was as thick as it once was.’ W ith no physical laws saying it should be otherwise, all souls soon achieve the appearance they find most ideal. M ore often than not, this is an age before forty. This effect doesn’t exist in P urgatory, which is why it is only recently that you have both begun to change.”
J ohn looked over at Dante and was startled. The difference was subtle but it was there. G one were the lines beneath his eyes and the pallor of his skin. The years spent drinking—and whatever else he had go en up to—had mostly been erased, although he still appeared to be in his thirties. Even his hair had a healthier shine.
“Do I look different?” John asked.
“A li le bit closer to being jail bait,” R immon said, “but still old enough to be taken seriously.”
“I be er not return to my teenage years,” Dante warned. “I was a walking zit until I hit my twenties.”
“Don’t worry,” R immon assured him. “Age is always based on your personal ideal, the appearance you felt most confident about. O ld age wasn’t common in ancient Egypt and was an achievement that brought great respect. That is why some women here choose to wear their wrinkles as a badge of honor.”
“I like that,” J ohn said, “but if a hot enough guy comes along, I bet they start ge ing younger.”
W hen they reached the Nile, they stared in wonder at its dazzlingly clear water, despite its great depth. Here people swam or paddled small wooden boats. A passing sailor offered them a ride, which they declined since the jade pyramid was now near enough to see.
Next they passed through a small village, and a group of children abandoned their games to run after them, fascinated by the lightness of J ohn’s hair and amused by R immon’s tail. B olo was in paradise, chasing off in all directions, greeting everyone, and creating laughter wherever he went.
J ohn could imagine staying here. The only thing missing was a clear blue sky and the warmth of the sun. He wanted to return that light to these good people, to give them back their god. He didn’t know how, but he felt he was meant to find the reason behind Ra’s disappearance. Why else would the sun god have appeared to him?
E ven more animal-headed gods were waiting outside of the great jade pyramid, but they weren’t the biggest surprise. I n their midst was the unmistakable shape of the steam coach.
“How did you get it back?” J ohn asked, running to it and placing a hand against the cool wood. “Hermes said it was covered in glass men.”
“I t was.” S et handed a cloth sack to him. The chaotic god looked as though he had been severely beaten, as did Horus, who was standing further away, but both of them appeared satisfied rather than angry. “These men of glass are nothing in ba le compared to my nephew.”
John took the heavy bag and peered inside. It was filled with powdered glass.
“You see what we have to offer,” Thoth spoke. “We E gyptians have always understood the secrets of creation. W hen one understands how something is built, destroying it is only a matter of snipping a single thread.”
“Hell would be honored to have your support,” R immon said, “but I know be er than to think it will come free.”
“S ouls,” O siris said, thumb and finger on his green chin. “Travel between realms has all but ceased. All of us are like puddles separated from the sea, growing more stagnant by the day. O ur hope is that the actions of this war will start the rivers flowing between us again, but until then our realm is the most drastically affected. O ur culture is so ancient that all who would come to us have done so long ago. Thus we need the invigoration of fresh life. Our price is ten thousand souls.” Rimmon nodded thoughtfully. “I have no doubt that after the war—”
“Now, not after the war.” O siris said. “The surplus of souls caused by P urgatory’s fall is another matter. Ten thousand souls and you have our loyalty.” R immon launched into negotiations, but he faced tough competition. J ohn felt uncomfortable with the entire proceedings. He didn’t understand why they needed the souls, or how those souls would reinvigorate the gods’ lives. W hatever this meant, J ohn didn’t like people being treated as currency. He watched distractedly as B olo tried in vain to a ract the a ention of Anubis, jackal-headed god of mummification.
J ohn supposed it was lucky that the dog hadn’t noticed the cat-headed goddess in their midst. Then the negotiations were over. R immon hadn’t gained any ground. The number of souls would not be reduced.
“Ten thousand souls,” the demon said, extending his hand to Osiris.
“No.”
The gods turned as one to look at John.
“We’re fighting to free souls from P urgatory,” he said. “I won’t let you treat them like poker chips!”
“What is this chipped poker that he speaks of?” Set growled.
“I believe his concern lies with the fate of the souls in question,” Thoth said gently.
“This is why we wanted you to see some of our land, so you would know that existence is good here, as it will be for those who come.”
“The souls will be volunteers,” R immon added, “those who wish to move on.
Nobody will be forced to come here against their will.”
J ohn knew he could trust R immon, knew to the very core of his being since touching his heart, but that didn’t mean R immon couldn’t be mistaken. A piece was missing from this puzzle, some vital information they weren’t being told, and J ohn wouldn’t budge until he found out what.
“I f you want us to work with you,” he said, “then you have to come clean.
Otherwise, no deal.”
Rimmon tried to intervene. “John, I’m sure there is nothing to be concerned—”
“Very well,” Thoth said, nodding with a dip of his bird beak. “Too often a blind eye is turned to those details of life considered unpleasant. O ur realm isn’t the paradise we’ve led you to believe. E xtend your trust in us and make one more journey, this time to the onyx pyramid of the north. There you shall find your answers.”
* * * * *
“You just had to open your big mouth, didn’t you?”
J ohn ignored Dante and focused on their destination. He could see the dark pyramid on the horizon. G one were the fountains, the lush green grass, and the winding Nile. I n their place was only sand and silence. W hat this had to do with the ten thousand souls, he didn’t yet understand, but the answers were only moments away.
“J ohn,” R immon said, removing B olo’s leash so he could run free. “S low down.
We’ll be there soon enough.”
“You’re one to talk,” John replied.
Rimmon digested this. “You feel I was too hasty in my negotiations.”
“Yes. Ugh. I don’t know. The whole thing sounded like human trafficking. W hat if I hadn’t challenged them? We never would have learned the real reason they wanted the souls.”
“I ’m sorry. I should have asked more questions. I feel as though I ’ve betrayed your trust.”
“You haven’t. I know I can trust you, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t be wrong, especially if you’re being lied to.”
R immon took hold of J ohn’s arm and stopped him. “This isn’t only about the Egyptians, is it?”
“No,” J ohn admi ed, “it isn’t. The leaders of each realm go missing, the M inisters of O rder arrive, and all the pantheons fall in line. I t’s all too convenient. The chess pieces have been perfectly arranged on the board, and when I ask myself who really stands to gain from all of this, the arrows keep pointing to Hell.” Rimmon was silent.
John’s jaw dropped. “You know something!”
“I know a good many things, but I have never deceived you. You are right that there is a game being played, but I don’t pretend to understand the rules. There are two halves of the board, and I promise you Hell and the M inisters of O rder are on opposite sides.”
“And the missing leaders?”
“That is a question I cannot answer, but if you trust me just until we return to Hell, then I’ll make sure you hear the truth from the horse’s mouth.”
“Does this horse happen to have three eyes and chain-smoke cigars?” Rimmon smiled. “Yes.”
J ohn nodded. “O kay. Not only do I need answers, but the other pantheons do as well. If we expect them to fight alongside us, the least we can do is tell them the truth.” The demon agreed before breaking into laughter. “O h, how you remind me of him!
Always so serious, so earnest in your duty. L ook around you, J ohn! You’re in immortal Egypt, surrounded by the old gods and their pyramids. Drink in the details and allow yourself to become intoxicated!”
“Yes. It’s very nice,” John said, hiding a smile.
“Very nice?”
R immon shook his head, before grabbing up J ohn in his arms and spinning him around, as if they were dancing. “I would show you so many wonders, see that stoic face of yours light up like a child’s. There are red sands in the second circle of Hell that flow like a river, pulling you down into their warmth, but the sensation isn’t uncomfortable. The way your body bends and moves, like a snake across the ground, is pure ecstasy.”