Hell Inc. (36 page)

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Authors: C. M. Stunich

Tags: #Fantasy

BOOK: Hell Inc.
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When
a knock at the door came, I expected Marji to ignore it. When a
person's got a beheaded corpse not three feet from their welcome mat,
they ought to consider pretending not to be home. This didn't occur
to the elf.

She
opened the door a crack before even inquiring who was outside of it.
Helena shoved her way in without being invited and froze, pupils
dilating instantly at the scent of so much blood.

“What
the fuck?” She looked from the genie, to Levie, to my floating
head and then down at my corpse. She then turned her attention to
Marji. “What the fuck?” Marji shrugged.

“It
was an accident. I thought that I'd forgotten the soul again.”
Helena groaned and sidestepped my head, walking over to stand next
to me. Her eyes were full of concern and an extraordinary amount of
guilt.

“God
Ginger. I am sorry. This is all kind of my fault.” Levie's
wings perked up, and his head swiveled dangerously towards her.
“Liam had been kidnapping some of our clients. We threatened
him and ... uh ... kind of murdered his Dad.” I
raised my eyebrows. Ah, the stair comment she had made suddenly
clicked. The ancient, all powerful vampire had been shoved down some
stairs and killed. Kind of anticlimactic. “Ever since it's
been a virtual back and forth blood bath. I'm sorry you got caught
in the middle of it.” Levie growled menacingly at her. I
scrambled to my feet so that I could watch him.

“Levie,
don't.” I stepped in between the two of them, though it was
more symbolic than anything else considering the fact that they could
both pass through me if they wanted. Helena wrinkled her nose at the
monkey's paw and stepped back.

“What
are you doing with that?” Her pupils were shrinking back to
normal rapidly now that her nose was filled with monkey meat instead
of blood. I took a polite step away from her.

“We're
going to resurrect me.” She bit her bottom lip and adjusted
the purple and orange Oompa Loompa shirt that she was wearing.

“With
an Infernix product? You guys sure are desperate.” I turned
towards her so quickly that I lost hold of the monkey's paw. It went
flying, and she ended up catching it with a horrified expression on
her face. I held out my hands, and she dropped it back in.

“Infernix?”
Another growl from Levie. I sighed and dropped the subject. I had
more important things to worry about at that moment. Dia giggled and
offered Helena a martini, which she took and sipped.

“Ginger
and I are going to rescue your clients together. Aren't we Ginger?”
I gave her a look that tried to communicate my distaste for her
drunken raving. It failed to process. She continued blabbing.
“Those psycho vampire fucks are going to be soooo sorry when we
get to them. Aren't they, girl?” Helena raised an eyebrow and
Marji joined us in the living room, perching on the back of Dia's
couch.

“Good
luck with that.” Helena shook her head and sighed, sitting
down on the love seat that I'd been craving so strongly. She didn't
seem to notice my look of longing. “Liam and Nathaniel are
dead and their business is going into bankruptcy, but there's still
no sign of the genies. Who the hell knows what happened to them?”
I opened my mouth to thank her for killing my would be rapist/mother
murderer when something else popped out.

“How
is the sphinx?” I asked without meaning to. I actually missed
his presence. Even if he was full of useless knowledge and also my
previous jailer. Helena smiled, her fangs poking out over her bottom
lip.

“I
think he misses you. He's been so mopey since you died.” My
lips twitched. I was pleased to hear something positive for a
change. “He'll be happy to trail you again when you're alive.”
My lips twitched again, this time in a more southerly direction.

“Thanks
for the reminder,” I snapped. Helena glanced up at me.

“We
have a business to run, Ginger. Just like Hell Inc. Just like
Infernix. We can't just let this go. But you have a genie now
anyway. Just unwish your wish and I'm sure Hahti will call it even.”
I looked over at the drunken Dia and wondered if she was capable of
anything right now.

“Can't,”
she slurred, considerably less coherent than she'd been several
moments ago. “Need to rest.” With that, she passed out
into Marji's ugly gold and white tasseled decorative pillows.

“I
guess I don't have any magic left for her to use,” I said,
hoping for an elaboration by one of the three supernaturals in the
room. No one commented. I sighed and checked on Levie. He was
still scribbling away, brow furrowed in thought. Why did wishes have
to be so specific? Didn't magic have any common sense?

“Well,”
Helena said, rubbing her hands along the legs of her skinny jeans.
“I was just coming over to check on you. Complaints in this
area have risen to an all time high and Hahti wants results now.”
She paused and worried at her lip with her fangs for a moment before
speaking again. “And I just want to apologize if any of my
clients have been ... less than kind lately. Apparently,
there's some blog online about you. It gives all of your personal
information: name, address, photos, names of friends and family, cup
size. It was posted by someone under the screen name CynCyn76.”
I almost dropped the monkey's paw. Or rather it almost passed
through my hands as I lost concentration.

CynCyn76?
Who else could that be other than Cynthia, Terrence's friend. Or
whatever the hell she was. If Terrence was an incubus, she was
probably a troll. I still needed answers on that particular problem,
but they would have to wait. Again. It seemed like my questions
were being put on hold a lot lately. It was frustrating as hell.

Then
I remembered. Erin. Shit.

“Oh
my god!” I clasped a smelly hand to my mouth and almost gagged.
“Erin!” I stumbled forward and fell through the coffee
table. Marji leaned down and tried to help me out and up, but her
hands kept passing through my shoulders. I waved her away and
struggled to my feet.

“The
fairies. They have my friend, Erin. They kidnapped her.”
Helena stared at me for a moment before recognition registered across
her features.

“Ah.
That chubby, unfortunate girl is your friend or ... ?”
She gave me a lecherous look. I almost puked again. God. Maybe
Marji was right about throwing up. But the thought of Erin and me?
Eww. It wasn't that she was a woman, it was just that she was, well,
Erin.

“My
friend, just a friend,” I said, noticing Levie's eyes were on
me again. I ignored him. “Is she okay?” Helena nodded
and chewed on the end of one of her long, purple fingernails.

“Yeah.
Well, she's a little hysterical. We're keeping her for observation.
You'll need to come and pick her up.” I groaned. Great.
What was I going to say by way of explanation?
Sorry Erin,
a wish of mine went a bit awry, and you had to pay for it. My bad.

At
least she was safe. It was one less thing to worry about.

“Ginger.”
It was Levie. Everyone but Diamokina, who was still passed out,
turned to look. “It is ready.”

 

The
instructions on the piece of paper that Levie handed to me were
monumentally more difficult than the ones that Dia had given me. The
monkey's paw had to be controlled much more carefully because of the
devilish nature of the thing. For that reason, I was scared. So
much so that I allowed Levie to hold one of my hands while I
rehearsed it. It was written like a legal document. Detailed bits
of jargon that specified even the tiniest detail. Despite what Marji
had said, Levie had a talent for this.

I
gave him one last worried look before I began. He smiled
encouragingly and squeezed my hand. His was warm and sweaty. He was
nervous, too. Great. I released his hand and tried to hold the
shaking notepad still.

“I
wish that the human corpse lying immediately in front of me was
restored to its former state ... ”

The
words took up several pages, and if the Felix clock on the wall was
correct, it took me a whole twenty minutes to complete the damn
thing. After I'd spoken the last word, I felt my knees go numb.
Good sign.

My
arms went next and the familiar sequence helped to keep me calm as my
vision readjusted from Levie standing next to me, to his black boots
being several inches in front of my face. My body was cold and heavy
and my face was stuck to the rug by a mass of congealed blood, but I
was alive and it felt great. I hadn't realized how dulled my senses
had been when I was a ghost. Even if I was uncomfortable as hell
right now, at least I was alive.

Levie
sat down next to me and stroked reassuring fingers down my back while
I waited to regain control of my limbs. His hands were much more
comforting than Dia's had been, and I felt my skin respond to his
touch. It was a little embarrassing that the first thing my body did
when restored to life was to get wet and ready for sex, but I didn't
have much control over it. At least not yet.

Fifteen
minutes later and I was sitting up, propped against a decorative side
table and sipping on a juice box. I was ravenous, but my jaw wasn't
working well enough to chew food yet, and I had a knitted afghan
around my shoulders for warmth. I wouldn't let Levie sit next to me
anymore. Not just because he made my body crazy but because I didn't
want him to get the wrong idea. We were not together. I wasn't
going to let this go so easily.

Helena
had left shortly after I'd first begun to move, citing business
reasons, and Marji was in the bathroom with Diamokina, trying to make
sure she didn't throw up on any of her stuff. This left Levie and I
alone together for the first time since his parents' house. It was
awkward, to say the least.

Levie
spoke first, breaking the silence.

“I
want you to ask me what you will. I want to answer your questions so
that I can assure you that I never meant to use you. I love –
” I interrupted him before he could utter that particular
phrase again.

“Why
can't you guys just go out and date like normal people? If Guardians
can see demons, then I don't see what the problem is.” Levie
leaned back against the table, and I could the nervous heat radiating
from him. I hoped he wouldn't set anything on fire. We'd already
trashed Marji's condo enough for one day.

“They
can see them, but it does not mean that they do. Many choose to
repress the ability with drugs or merely through their own denial.
And Ginger.” He reached a shaking hand into the pocket of the
odd chain mail and leather shirt that he was wearing. He pulled out
a box of cigarettes. I was surprised since I'd never seen him do it
before. It must have been the stress. I smacked his hand.

“Don't
do that.” He put them back and took a shuddering breath. His
orange eyes were searching my face, but I purposely avoided them.

“Ginger,
Guardians are few and far between. Hell Inc. is in business because
we have many methods of tracking them down. My uncle matches a
caseworker with the best possible client. He has a talent for
matchmaking.” Levie looked at me, an almost shy expression on
his face. “Our match was not by accident. My uncle believed
that we would do well together.” I suddenly felt shy and
turned my face towards the front door while he continued. “But
I have been matched before.” A wave of jealously rode through
me before I was able to gain control of myself. I kept my face away
from him. I refused to give him the satisfaction of seeing me like
this. “I did not like any of my other matches. So we did not
... ” He paused. I really didn't need him to finish his
sentence. I had a pretty good idea of what he was talking about.
Once
the relation is consummated, the two shall be bound together for this
life and the next.
Levie,
lacking all tact, continued. “We did not have sexual
intercourse.” I whirled back around to face him, my juice box
falling into my lap and my cheeks sanguine.

“Okay!
Okay! I know.” I grabbed the juice box again and stabbed the
straw into my mouth. Why couldn't he realize how difficult this was
for me?

“The
main purpose of this is, of course, to produce offspring, but Ginger
... ” He reached a now smoldering hand out and grasped my
upper arm. “I do not care about that. My uncle can disown me
as he did his own son. I do not exist solely to produce heirs for
him. Now that I have found you, I am loath to let you go.” I
pulled away from him and tried to stand up. My legs failed me, and I
ended up right in Levie's lap.

Our
eyes met, our faces inches apart, and I felt my body go crazy. There
was a parade between my legs that was hard to ignore, and suddenly my
mind was overwhelmed by all sorts of rationalizations of why it was
okay for me to just forgive and forget and jump right in the sack.
Hey,
you sold your soul expecting to have to work in Hell for several
centuries. Would it be so bad to spend those centuries screwing a
sexy demon who makes you hornier than a sixteen year old boy? I think
not.

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