Heart's Duo (Ugly Eternity #4) (7 page)

Jamie flipped the stereo on, drowning out the noises coming from next door before joining Hawke in the shower. “Agreed.”

* * * * *

Maddox stared at the face of his phone almost certain his mouth had fallen open in his surprise. Only the snapping of his teeth, as they came together, broke through the haze of his shock. He answered before he lost his chance.

“Hello.”

Jamie cleared his throat before responding. “Um. Hello. Merry Christmas. A little early.”

Wow. Maddox didn’t know what to say. Thankfully, his numb lips found the words his brain couldn’t grasp. “Merry Christmas.”

“So, um, I noticed you called yesterday.”

Jamie sounded so freaking uncomfortable, but he’d returned Maddox’s call. It was more than Maddox ever thought would happen. “I did, but I honestly didn’t think you’d call me back.”

“Yeah, well, me either.”

Huh. That was Jamie—honest to a fault. “How’s—how have you been?” He wanted to ask how married life was treating him, but Maddox knew anything he said that as much as hinted at Hawke would get him shut down fast.

“Good. How about you?”

Maddox almost responded in kind, wanting to keep things afloat. Unfortunately, his life was such a mess, his lips refused to shape that lie. “Not so great. I’m hanging out at the hospital waiting for news on my dad.”

“What happened?”

“They don’t know yet. He collapsed at work and they rushed him in. His spleen ruptured for no apparent reason and he almost bled out.” Maddox nearly choked on the words. He’d never been more scared. “Anyhow, they’re keeping him in a clean room until they figure out what happened. I’m not allowed back there in case it’s some horrible superbug, so I’m stuck hanging out in the waiting room and staring at a TV I can’t control.”

“Dude, that’s awful.” Maddox heard someone say something in the background, and Jamie repeated the news. He assumed it was Hawke. Jamie’s next words confirmed his thoughts. “Hold on, Maddox. I’m going to put you on speaker. Hawke wants in on this.”

Maddox’s fingers tightened on the phone, but somehow he squeezed out an agreement. “Okay.” It sounded as if something was brushing across the receiver before Hawke’s voice came through the line.

“What can we do to help?”

Swallowing past the lump in his throat, Maddox’s eyes fell closed as he tried to think of some way to respond. When he did, his voice came out sounding as if he’d been chomping on glass. “There’s nothing anyone can do. I’m just waiting it out.”

“We could move stuff around, right?”

Maddox didn’t think Hawke was talking to him, but he treated it that way. “No. You can’t. I’m fine.” They ignored him.

“Yeah. If we shuffle your parents off, we could probably get a flight out tomorrow. I’ve got a meeting with Guillotine tomorrow afternoon, but Benton could go without me since it’s an emergency.”

“Let us make some calls, Maddox. We could be there by tomorrow night.”

It was part heaven and mostly Hell having Hawke make such an offer after everything they’d been through. “No. You’re not doing all that just to sit in the waiting room with me.”

“What about Cade and Dylan?” Jamie asked, talking over the top of him.

“They have jobs. Look, it’s not like I have anything else going on. I’ll be fine.”

Hawke made a scoffing noise Maddox knew too well. His throat burned. “It’s not about what you can handle. You shouldn’t have to be alone right now.”

“I’m not,” he lied. “Someone’s coming to give me a break in a little while.” It was total bullshit, but he couldn’t let them hop a plane. “I appreciate the offer though.” More than they would ever know.

“Are you sure?” The skeptical note to Hawke’s voice made him smile.

“I’m sure.”

“We could still move things around if you change your mind.”

The ache in Maddox’s knuckles said a lot about how tightly he gripped the phone. Of all the people in the world to make this offer to him, it would be Hawke. Life enjoyed kicking him in the balls. “Seriously, I’m good, but thanks.”

“Call us if you change your mind,” Jamie said, refusing to back down. “I’ll text you Hawke’s new number, so you can call either of us if you need anything, and we’ll call again tomorrow to check on you.”

“All right.”

“We’ll talk to you then.”

Maddox swallowed against Hawke’s promise. “All right.”

Five minutes passed after the call disconnected before Maddox stopped staring at the face of his phone. He had no words. It rang, startling him. Cade’s name appeared. Maddox rolled his eyes as he pressed the device to his ear. He already knew.

“Why the fuck didn’t you say anything? I had to find this shit out from Jamie? I’ll be down there in ten minutes.”

The absolute absence of noise let Maddox know Cade was already gone. He should’ve known Hawke and Jamie wouldn’t take him at his word. They already knew it wasn’t worth shit.

* * * * *

The table was subdued, even for one of their uncomfortable dinners. Hawke’s food went untouched. Instead, he took turns leaning into Jamie’s side and slinging his arm across the back of her chair. For a moment, Sophie entertained the possibility she’d somehow missed an altercation during the day. That idea ended at Hawke’s and Jamie’s bedroom. They hadn’t left it all day. There was no denying she was missing something. The tension was choking her, and she was the only person at the table who was still meeting anyone else’s gaze. Of course, Benton hadn’t looked her way since he told her to hit the road in New Orleans. It still hurt. She couldn’t lie. In fact, he’d avoided her the entire week and a half she’d been staying with Hawke. Tonight, he’d shown up out of the blue. Sophie was torn between kneeing him in the balls and begging him to forgive her.

Her mom finally burst, pulling Sophie’s attention her way. “I’m sorry.”

“Kill me now,” Hawke muttered under his breath. Her mother’s distress couldn’t be deterred, even by Hawke’s protest.

“I’m just so embarrassed.” Indeed, she was red-faced. Sophie was fascinated. “Everyone was busy and the bed in our room doesn’t have a good place for handcuffs.”

With her fork raised halfway to her mouth, Sophie froze.
Handcuffs? Was her dad blushing? What the fuck?

“Ah. A secret revealed. Imagine that.” Benton’s smart ass comment had Sophie’s toe itching. She could reach his crotch from here if she tried. There wasn’t a doubt in her mind his remark was aimed at her.

“It’s fine,” Jamie said, brushing off Kathy’s apology and obviously unaffected by whatever was going on.

Her mom wasn’t ready to let it go. Sophie couldn’t look away. “I had no idea the walls in this place were so thin.”

“Or how to lock a door,” Hawke added, still refusing to look at anyone.

“Seriously,” Jamie cut in. “It’s not a big deal.” Sophie got the feeling he was enjoying himself. “It could’ve happened to anyone. I’ll make sure you have a sturdier headboard the next time you come to visit. You have some awesome pegging equipment by the way.”

Sophie was going to die, but not before Hawke. “Dear God. Please? Someone give me a rusty spoon so I can carve out my eyes.”

Her dad finally spoke up. “Quit being dramatic. I’m sure this house has seen its fair share of ass play.”

Sophie choked. “No. Just. No.”

“You would be opposed to honesty,” Benton said, buttering a roll and avoiding her death stare.

Joss pushed away from the table, bringing the horror to an end. “Well, this has been fun, but I need a drink.”

“We always have the best dinners,” Jamie chirped, shoveling a fork full of food in his mouth. “Loads of sharing and caring.”

“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” Kathy fussed, tapping him on the arm.

“Yes ma’am,” Jamie said with a smile, immediately disobeying. Kathy couldn’t have looked more pleased. Sophie couldn’t take another second. Not one single moment of Joss being so close and Benton hating her. No more anything.

“I lied.” Sophie wanted to snatch the words back the instant they left her lips. Everyone froze. Possibly there were thousands of ways she could backtrack. She could crack a joke, and pretend it didn’t happen, but Sophie couldn’t go back to having Benton look at her with disappointment in his eyes. It was one thing to play the scene over and over again in her head, remembering every angry word he’d said—his fury as he’d ordered her to stay away from him. It was another to have him sitting across from her, rejecting her with his every action. She couldn’t stand it any longer. Shoring up her courage, Sophie met Hawke’s stare. “When I told you Joss was living with Maddox, I lied. Joss was asleep in my bed the morning you pointed out that his truck was always parked outside Maddox’s apartment.” Hawke blinked, obviously at a loss. Unfortunately, Joss didn’t seem to have any such problem. He sat back down.

“You told him what? Why would you do such a thing?”

Since Sophie already felt exposed, it didn’t take much to set her off. She shot Joss an annoyed glance. “Don’t play innocent Joss. There isn’t a chance in hell it would’ve happened if you hadn’t started the whole thing by toying with Maddox. I just didn’t want Hawke to take Maddox back. At least, not until he’d had time to make the trip out to California to see Jamie.” Switching her attention back to Hawke, she ignored his shock. “Truly, if things hadn’t worked out, I swear I would’ve come clean the moment you got home from your trip, but I couldn’t let you miss your chance to be happy again. I wanted you to smile like you used to before Jamie left. I’m a lot of things, but at heart, I’m not a liar. If you’d gone to see Jamie and things hadn’t gone well, I would’ve told you everything. This has nothing to do with Maddox. Honestly, I think he’s a great guy. He’s just not your great guy.”

Joss didn’t give Hawke time to respond. “I can’t believe you did that, Sophie. All I did was send some texts and drop a few hints and insinuations. You told Hawke I was living with Maddox? That’s huge. I just…I can’t even…”

While Sophie had expected outrage from Hawke and possibly Jamie, she was completely unprepared for Joss’ fury. It pissed her off. “Please? Spare me, Joss. When all this began, you claimed you were only testing Maddox, because—according to you—he wasn’t known for being faithful. You said if he didn’t bite, you’d back off, but he deserved it for all the hell he’d put Hawke through.” That point reminded her of another. She turned to Hawke, incapable of stopping. “Which, by the way, I had to hear from him,” she said, jabbing a finger in Joss’ direction. “I thought Maddox was just some tenant who had a tenuous connection to you and fell for you after you’d spent way too much time fixing all the broken shit in his apartment. If I’d known from the beginning who he really was, I would’ve put my foot so far up his ass there’d been nothing left for you to reconcile with. Nobody screws around with my brother’s heart no matter how much I like them.”

Hawke opened his mouth as if he meant to argue. Sophie threw her hand up, stopping him before turning her rage on Joss once more. “As for you, instead of getting pissed off at me, maybe you should take a closer look at yourself. I might be a little twisted and do things no good girl would. In fact, I might spend my time in places most people never hear about and know a little too much about bringing someone to orgasm without ever touching them.” Before her mom could ask, Sophie cast a quick glance in her direction. “Don’t ask. I have a book. I’ll loan it to you.” With that out of the way, she focused on Joss again. “Having said all that, at least I know who I am, and I’m not ashamed. Maybe it’s time you ask yourself why you continued sending those texts long after it became apparent Maddox wouldn’t cheat on Hawke.”

“Maddox didn’t cheat on Hawke,” Jamie repeated, sounding stunned. Sophie didn’t bother looking his way. She couldn’t tear her eyes away from Joss’ face.

“Of course, he didn’t,” Joss snapped. “Give the guy some credit.”

His defense of Maddox made her eyes sting. All the things that had gone unsaid since she’d walked away from Dylan and Cade’s reception, clogged her chest. “I saw you kiss him,” Sophie said, ashamed of how her heartache shone in every word. Never in a million years did she want him to have the satisfaction of knowing he’d hurt her. A muscle in his jaw ticked.

“I know. I meant for you to see us.”

Sophie shook her head. It was obvious he didn’t understand. “I
saw
you when you kissed Maddox. Perhaps, in the beginning, you hoped Maddox would fail so Hawke would turn to Jamie. I also think, at one time, you felt something for me. At least, I hope you did,” she added, almost too quietly for anyone to hear because it hurt. Hawke’s hand found hers beneath the table. As his fingers squeezed hers, Sophie swallowed past the burn of her confession and the knowledge Hawke was still on her side even if he was angry. “I felt something for you too, but I saw your face when you kissed Maddox. I saw
you
.”

Turning away, Sophie carefully avoided Benton’s gaze. She could feel him watching her, but she was barely holding her shit together as it was. If she looked and saw his disapproval one more time, she wouldn’t make it. Instead, she focused on Hawke, surprised to find his face swimming a bit before her eyes. Sophie blinked. No way in hell would she cry. She had no regrets.

“I’m sorry.”

A sad smile touched Hawke’s lips at her apology. “Yeah. Me too.”

Draping his arm across the back of her chair, Hawke settled deeper into his. After a full minute of staring into space, he brought Jamie’s hand to his mouth and held it there as if silently reassuring the man nothing had changed. No one said a word nor did they leave the table. With a deep breath for courage, Sophie finally met Benton’s stare. He dipped his chin. The tightness in her chest eased. She’d done the right thing.

Chapter 4

Joss tapped his knuckles on the door frame before he could wuss out. He’d done everything he could think of to avoid this moment. After the dinner debacle, Joss had gone out and explored London by night. With zero sleep under his belt, he’d waited for Jamie to get moving for the day before talking things out. Now, there’s was no more hiding. Sophie and Hawke glanced over at his interruption. There wasn’t an ounce of malice in Hawke’s eyes. There should’ve been, but there wasn’t. Sophie, as always, barely spared him a glance before dismissing him. He couldn’t blame her.