Heart of the Dragon (14 page)

He nodded. “She’s arrogant. But she’s also frightened and vulnerable. Mayura is her daughter, in a sense. She couldn’t have children of her own, and in a country as traditional as this, that’s hard on a woman’s self-esteem. According to what my father has told me about her, her husband deserted her because of it.”

“To me that says she had even more reason to steal Mayura from my father.”

“There’s no evidence of that. She doesn’t know what to make of your story. Or of you.”

“You don’t know what to make of me, either. You didn’t even want to wake up beside me.”

After he set the tray on a table near the bed, he turned
to face her. The silence between them was fraught with meaning. “I thought it best to leave while you were still asleep.”

“I wouldn’t have begged you for favors again.” Her face burning, she wrapped the flowing blue robe around herself and sat down on a hard teak chair across the room.

“You look very uncomfortable and righteous,” he said. “But beautiful.” His voice was somber, and his severe expression chilled her. “Go home to Iowa. Marry a nice man. Someone who’ll never disappoint you.”

“You have no idea what disappoints me,” she said in a low, gritty voice. “But you think you understand what’s good for me. I’ll tell you what I expect from a man. I expect him to have enough respect for me to let me make my own decisions. I expect him to believe in my strength and maturity. I expect him not to protect me from phantoms only
he
can see, but won’t explain to me.”

Kash turned from the table, as tall and unyielding as a pillar of stone, his gaze cold. “My father will arrive this afternoon. I’ve asked him to speak with Madame Piathip. Because he’s known her a long time, he may be able to convince her to treat you better.”

“You’re ignoring everything I just said.”

Striding to the door, he paused for a second and gave her a look that stopped her breath. It made her think of smoky light trapped inside a diamond. “I feel your accusations like a knife inside me,” he said simply. “But I’m very good at ignoring how I feel, in order to do what’s best for all concerned.”

“What’s best for you, you mean.”

Before he walked out the door, he gave her a slight nod, as gallant and formal as a stranger’s.

Rebecca waited beside Kash in a garden room filled with orchids. Audubon, who’d arrived from the airport
in a private car less than an hour before, was upstairs in conference with Madame Piathip. Rebecca had been struck by his majestic appearance—a patrician but gracious face, thick silver hair, a tall, athletic body, and an impeccable black suit. Audubon had the charm and sophistication of an Old World gentleman, but there was also an air of rugged physical ability about him.

It was easy to see that Kash mirrored his adoptive father. But Audubon had a peaceful aura that Kash lacked. Rebecca liked Audubon immediately. Waiting for him to come back down the villa’s long, gilded staircase, she wondered what he thought of her, an ordinary young woman in a green shirtwaist dress, who’d grinned at him but had been unable to keep the tears out of her eyes as she glanced at Kash. From the troubled, inquisitive look Audubon had given them both, she was certain he’d noticed.

She asked Kash about his father’s unusual name. “No one knows his given names, not even me,” Kash explained. “He’ll only admit that his initials are T. S. I’ve always claimed that he keeps his names secret because they’re silly. When I was a boy I called him Tecumseh Shirley sometimes, just to make him laugh. But he’s a very private man.”

“Is he the one who taught you to be cynical and aloof?”

“No, he taught me to be truthful with myself. He taught me that honor and ideals are still important. And he taught me to do my job and keep my personal problems out of it. ”

“But you said he’s happily married.”

“What does that have to do with what I said?”

“He couldn’t be happily married and be as secretive as you are.”

A slight smile—a sign that she’d scored a point, Rebecca thought—lightened Kash’s somber expression. “He’s not secretive, just private. And besides, he and I come from very different backgrounds. We have different reasons for our attitudes.”

When Audubon returned, he was shaking his head in dismay, but chuckling under his breath. “Ms. Brown, come with me. Let’s take a walk and discuss your situation.”

Kash raised a brow but said nothing. Rebecca shot him a puzzled look and walked outside the magnificent old home with Audubon. For nearly a minute they strolled the estate’s winding garden path in silence, except for his casual comments about the beauty of the oleanders and willows. Rebecca clasped her hands behind her back and waited.

Finally Audubon said, “Madame Piathip wants me to investigate you myself. She’s convinced that Kash can’t, or rather won’t, do a proper job of it.”

“Why?”

“Because she believes he’s falling in love with you.”

Rebecca stopped so abruptly that she slipped on the pebbled path and nearly fell down. Audubon caught her by the arm. She found her balance and stared up at him desperately. His expression was somber, but not unkind. “After listening to him rant and rave about you on the phone over the past few days—and I assure you, Rebecca, my son is
not
given to emotional outbursts—and today, seeing the way he looks at you when you’re not aware of it, I think Madame Piathip may be right.”

“I wish it were true.”

“Do you think you could love my son?”

She searched his eyes, worried about their displeased expression. But Rebecca gave him the only answer she could. “Yes. I know that sounds outrageous, because he and I just met a few days ago, but”—she searched for words to describe the firestorm of needs and emotions Kash created in her—“but meeting him was like waking up in a world I’d never seen before, being overwhelmed and confused by it, but knowing it was where I’d always wanted to live.”

“I understand.” To her surprise, Audubon’s expression gentled. For a moment he was distracted, as if he
were thinking of someone else. “I understand very well. ” His tone was so loving that Rebecca was mesmerized. “My wife and I had a similar circumstance. Worlds apart, but the same.”

“That’s it, exactly. But Kash won’t let me inside
his
world.”

Audubon’s eyes became troubled again. “He’s not like any other man you’ll ever meet. It will take a very special understanding on your part to love him. Whether or not you can break through the walls he’s built will depend on how well you understand yourself.”

“How well I understand
myself?”

He nodded. “You have to know exactly what makes a man worth loving—the important qualities, not the ones society taught you to appreciate. You have to be absolutely certain.”

For the first time she felt hope. “I’m certain.” She said it without hesitation, looking him straight in the eye. He looked down at her with growing admiration, then nodded again, appearing satisfied. He gestured toward the path. “Then let’s keep walking, and I’ll try to help you understand my son.”

Kash was alarmed when Audubon came back alone. Before he could ask why, Audubon clucked reproachfully. “I didn’t put opium in her tea and leave her sleeping in a shrub. Don’t look at me that way.”

“Where is she?”

“She went back to her room. She’s understandably upset. I told her Madame Piathip will never allow her to meet Mayura, and since Mayura, being an obedient niece, will never contradict her aunt’s wishes, it’s probably useless to keep trying. I also let her know that Mayura has been in Europe all this time, waiting for the Nalinat feud to be resolved.”

Kash had a depressing vision of Rebecca packing to go home. Audubon put a consoling hand on his arm.
“Rebecca is an innocent bystander in a muddled story we’ll probably never verify. I’ll do all I can to check out the details you’ve given me. I hope to have some information for you soon. Who knows what really happened over thirty years ago? All that matters now is that Madame Piathip is head of the Vatan family, and she says Rebecca’s father was lying.”

“So I should forget about Rebecca’s problem and concentrate on negotiating the feud between the Vatans and Nalinats?”

“I didn’t say to forget about Rebecca. Just don’t expect miracles with the Vatan family. In the meantime why don’t you get to know Rebecca better, and let her get to know you?”

“Shell be going back to America soon.”

“So? The last time I checked a map, Iowa wasn’t terribly far from Virginia. You could visit her. Or invite her to visit you. She can stay at the estate with Elena and me, if that will make you feel less threatened.” Audubon smiled. “Good Lord, son, I’ve never thought of myself as your chaperon, but I’ll certainly try.”

“No. You of all people know why she and I have nothing in common. If she knew about my childhood, she’d never come near me again. She thinks it’s something she could handle, but she’s wrong.”

Audubon took him by both shoulders. Kash and his father were nearly the same height, with Audubon only an inch taller, so they met eye-to-eye, a father and son who were only twelve years apart in age, an unlikely pair with a relationship that had often been strained, but always loving. “You left Vietnam twenty-two years ago. You were never to blame for what happened to you there. You were only a child. I thought you’d made peace with that long ago. It’s been years since you and I have even discussed it.”

“I’ve never met anyone like Rebecca before. That’s why I’ve had to think about it again.”

“People aren’t shocked by these things the way they
were when you first came to America. And Rebecca certainly seems like the kind of person who’d understand.”

“She’d understand,” Kash agreed softly. “But deep down, it might disgust her. I couldn’t stand that.” He felt sick at the thought. “I won’t even risk it.”

“If you don’t give her a chance, you’ll always regret it.”

“I can’t make her leave, so I have no choice at the moment. But only because I’d rather she see for herself that Madame Piathip will never accept her story about being Mayura’s half sister. When Rebecca admits that, she’ll have to leave. And I’ll let her go.”

“That drawing must be incredibly difficult. I’ve never seen you frown so hard.”

Kash’s deep, teasing voice made Rebecca look up quickly from the drawing pad balanced on her knees. She was starved for the sight of him. Yesterday, after talking to Audubon, she’d needed some time alone. But now she had herself under control and could hide behind a quick smile. “Hello, Dragon.”

“Hello.”

He stood at the top of the path, near a small fountain that bubbled into a pool filled with gold and red fish. The breeze pushed a lock of his charcoal hair back from his high, solemn forehead, making his face look boyish in a way that tore at her heart. Though he stood with his large, capable hands shoved confidently into the pockets of tan trousers, and an open-collared tan shirt revealed the power of his dark-haired chest, he still seemed vulnerable to her.

She forgot the garden before her, the warm morning sun on her face, the trembling in her hands. The dull ache inside her chest throbbed in quiet devotion. “Flowers are harder to draw than dragons. Dragons don’t have to fit anybody’s imagination but my own. But
flowers? Everybody knows what flowers are supposed to look like.”

He walked down to the stone bench where she sat, and as he came closer, she saw the concern in his eyes. “Are you trying to be realistic these days?” he asked. “Have you given up your war on dragons?”

“No, I’m just rethinking my approach.”

“Hmmm. That could mean trouble. More trouble.”

“No, I’m feeling philosophical.” She forced a jaunty smile and swept a hand around her at the scenery and, more important, the situation. “I’m learning to flow with the moment.”

He dropped to his haunches beside the bench and looked directly into her eyes. The urge to slip her arms around his neck and kiss him very gently on the mouth was painful to resist. His troubled gaze traveled over her face. “When you stayed in your room yesterday, I didn’t know what to do.”

“I just needed to time to think.” To her horror, tears pooled in her eyes. I know;
what happened to you. But you have to tell me yourself, or it will never be all right. You have to trust me
.

Her tears heightened his distress. He reached out and stroked her shoulder soothingly. “I’m sorry my father gave you so little hope of solving this problem with the Vatan family.”

He thinks I’m crying about the Vatans
. She felt relieved and reassured because he didn’t suspect that she and Audubon had discussed his childhood.

She cleared her throat roughly and said with grand confidence, “There’s always hope. I’m betting on rainbows, not rain.”

A glint of humor came into his eyes. “Every cloud has a silver lining,” he intoned solemnly.

“It’s always darkest before the light.”

“Your glass is always half-full, not half empty.”

She began to chuckle. “Be happy. Don’t worry.”

“Have a nice day.”

They both laughed. Rebecca loved the rich, open sounds he made. She looked away, her eyes stinging again, this time with tears of poignant longing. “I guess you see that I’m not defeated yet.”

“Rebecca Brown, the eternal optimist. I’m not surprised.”

She swiveled toward him abruptly and blurted, “Oh, it’s easy to be an optimist when nothing terrible has ever happened to you. It doesn’t take such a leap of faith.”

Seeing his puzzled frown, she swallowed harshly and changed the subject. “What’s on the agenda for today?”

He grabbed one of her hands and stood up. Startled, she leaped up, too, and lurched against him. His swift embrace nearly undid her control, but she stepped back quickly.
Patience
, Audubon had counseled.

“I’ll never win awards for grace,” she admitted. “A less geeky woman might have done that on purpose. I did it because my feet are too big.”

“Elephants,” he said distractedly, his gaze locked on hers in a way that made her pulse race.

She blinked. “They’re not
that
big.”

“No, I mean that’s the agenda. You need something to distract you. Something to cheer you up and make you stop thinking about your father and the Vatans. Madame Piathip has gone to her offices in the city for a few days, so you can do what you want. Would you like to take an elephant ride into the hills?”