Heart in the Field (29 page)

           
She must have sensed his need.

           
“Let me get my coat,” she said.

           
His father was in a private hospital
room with his mother. Serena went straight to the bed and took hold of Maria’s
hand, something Nick could never do. He saw Maria cling to Serena’s fingers and
knew then that Maria might have fared better if she’d had a daughter.

           
“You two look very nice in your TV
clothes. Don’t they, Stephen?”

           
Stephen bowed his head in Serena’s
direction. “I remember once, a long time ago, seeing your father on
television.”

           
Nick saw Serena glance at him, but
he shook his head. He hadn’t mentioned anything about Redding Brown to his
father.

           
“How do you know who my father was?”
she asked Stephen.

           
“Your mother told me. Then I
remembered I had his book at home.” Stephen looked at his son. “I bought a lot
of books by journalists at one time, to try and understand my son’s career.”

           
Nick felt his mouth turn dry. He
couldn’t add anything to this discussion. It was so weird. He’d never thought
his father cared a damn about him or his career.

           
Stephen handed Nick the key to the
apartment. “This is your mother’s key. Don’t lose it.”

           
Nick pocketed the key. “I won’t.”

           
Serena smiled one of her white TV
smiles before they left. “It was a pleasure to see you again. I hope you’re
feeling much better soon, Maria.”

           
Nick said, when they were heading
toward Fraser’s Precious Gems, “You’ve sure got around them.”

           
“I’m not doing it on purpose, Nick.
They’re nice old people. After all, you have been away a long time. And your
dad just said he has tried to understand your career.”

           
“I’d never heard that one before.”

           
“Well, now you have. Maybe you
haven’t given them a chance.”

           
Nick drove by the store and
everything looked fine. He parked at the back behind the apartment and he told
Serena to wait in the car.

           
“No way.
I’m not sitting here alone in the dark.”

           
It had stopped raining now but the
air was still damp. So were the steps. Nick took hold of Serena’s hand so she
wouldn’t slip. It seemed ages since he’d held her hand, and he could feel the
warmth of her skin create a heat on his own skin.

           
He had to let go of her hand to
unlock the door, and they went inside. No lights had been left on, but a night
light glowed in the hallway. Everything was so silent in the apartment that he
could hear Serena breathing behind him. She moved up beside him.

           
“You should feel privileged,” he
told her.

           
“Why?” She turned her face to him
and her mouth was close enough to kiss.

           
“Because I was
never allowed to bring my friends home.
You’re the first. And you’ve
been here twice already.”

           
“Do you figure I’m your friend?”

           
“I feel that you are.” And that was
the truth.

           
“Is it easier for friends to part
than lovers?”

           
Her face looked pale in the
darkness. He lifted his hands to stroke her hair and tangle his fingers into
the golden strands. He heard her breath come from her lips in a shudder. He
traced her features with his fingertips. “Are you sure?”

           
“No.”

           
He wasn’t either, but he felt he had
her acquiescence. He slipped his arm around her and led her to the room that
used to be his when he was a boy. None of his belongings resided here.
Everything he’d ever owned here was at his own apartment. It was a small, brown
looking room, but in the dark all he saw was glorious white silk, gold hair and
soft flesh. He helped her off with her coat and he laid it down over a small chair
in front of a desk. Nick undid his tie and opened the top button of his shirt.
Then he slid his hands up beneath her skirt and peeled down her hose. She
kicked off her shoes and the stockings. All the time she gazed at him. With one
hand roaming her thighs and one hand behind the nape of her neck he kissed her,
thinking that this was the payoff for never having been allowed to have any
toys or bring friends here.

           
His Serena was the brightest toy he
could ever wish for. With her long legs wound around him he took her to the bed
and lay her down on the crisp cotton sheet. He undressed and lay with her. She
embraced him right away, her hunger as urgent as his own. He held back nothing
on the small, creaky mattress because there was nothing to hold back.

           
Later in the night, when Serena was
sleeping, he went along to the living room. On the bookshelves he found the
journalism books his father had mentioned. He couldn’t believe that Stephen
would need to understand him when he’d thought he’d done the best thing
possible by getting out of his father’s hair.

           
He glanced down to the street and
saw the pavement glimmering from the rain and the street lights. His throat
choked up. Damn. Damn. He had been cared for after all and he hadn’t known it?

           
Serena woke up, aware of harsh
sheets and prickly blankets covering her instead of her usual soft quilt. A
watery light filtered in through a small window hung with beige curtains. She’d
slept here all night at Nick’s parents’ place. Nick had been beside her at one
point. After they’d made love all over the narrow bed and once off it. Had she
really done all that with Nick? And why had she started their affair again? Or
hadn’t it really stopped?

           
The door pushed open and he came in,
wearing his black suit pants and his white shirt unbuttoned. “Hi.”

           
She thought he looked tired, with
deep lines carved from his nose to the edge of his mouth. She heaved herself up
on the hard pillow and drew the covers around her shoulders. “Hi. I didn’t
expect to stay the night.”

           
“Me neither. But we had a lot to do
with one another.”

           
She found she had to force a smile.
The atmosphere between them was strange.
“Yeah.”

           
He indicated his head in the
direction of the hallway. “The bathroom is across the way. I’ve run the water a
long time so it’s nice and warm if you want a bath. There’s no shower here.”

           
“He said accusingly. So they’re old
fashioned, Nick.
So what?”
She knew it was his parents
who were causing Nick to be in this funk. It wasn’t their lovemaking. That had
been sheer ecstasy.

           
“It was never just that.”

           
“But part of it. I bet when you were
a kid you couldn’t stand their old-fashioned ways.”

           
“That’s true.”

           
“It’s probably why your own
furniture is so modern and clean.”

           
He pushed his hands into his trouser
pockets. “It’s how I like things. Simple, not cluttered.”

           
“That’s how you’ve tried to live
your life as well.
Simple, no clutter.”

           
His expression was so grim his jaw
began to throb. “You’re right.”

           
“I know Nick, because it’s me as
well. That’s why I never wanted to go this far with you.” She drew herself out
of the bed and she saw his eyes alight on her naked form. She saw the grimness
turn to lust, and she felt the heat that he generated throughout her body burn
into her veins.

           
He withdrew his hands from his
pockets and came to her. “But we have gone this far. We’ve gone so damn far
we’re right out in space, hanging on for dear life. We had to do this again.
That weekend in the hotel wasn’t enough, was it?”

           
Breathless from his fondling hands,
she shook her head. “No.”

           
He returned to bed to set fire to
the sterile environment of his boyhood once more.

•

           
Nick’s mother came home from the
hospital the following Monday afternoon. Serena went with Nick to help him, and
they managed to get Maria up the steep steps into the apartment. Nick was
right, Serena decided. The Frasers did need to move into a home that was
brighter and more modern, where the heating would work better, with less drafty
surroundings and bathroom facilities that were designed for the elderly.

           
She asked Maria about it when Serena
was making Nick’s mother tea.

           
“I think we’re going to have to,”
Maria admitted. “I can’t manage those steps like this. I’ll talk to Stephen.”
Serena placed the tea things in front of Maria on the table.

           
“I’ve never had anyone do this for
me,” Maria said.

           
“You never had a daughter.”

           
“No. I didn’t want children.”

           
“But you had Nick?”

           
The distinguished female head
nodded. “Yes. I did.
Late in life.
I was past having a
child by then. You know, if you are going to marry Nick, I wouldn’t leave it
much longer.”

           
Serena wasn’t sure what was going to
happen with Nick. She’d begun a sexual relationship with him again, right here
in this apartment. His parents would likely be shocked if they knew. “I don’t
know about that,” she said and changed the subject. “Do you want your tea?”

           
When Serena got home on Friday, she
went straight around to Ginny’s house.
Ginny came out on the
steps wearing a pair of slim jeans and a long sweater.
She’d had her
dark hair cut short.

           
“Hair looks nice,” Serena said.

           
Ginny placed her palm at the back of
her head and posed. “It’s a style that makes it easier to handle. Where have
you been?”

           
“Working harder
than hard.”

           
Ginny’s green eyes twinkled.
“Nick Fraser keeping you going?”

           
“It’s a lot of work putting on a heavy
weekly news show.”

           
“It shows that you’ve put in a great
deal of effort. It’s very good. You’ve even got me watching Steel TV. Usually I
avoid the news like the plague. I loved the interview with your mother this
week.”

           
“That’s good. We were unsure about
that type of program.”

           
“Oh, no.
It’s great. Nick asked her a few tough questions and you could see her
hesitate. Having met your mother, it’s quite humorous to watch.”

           
“I don’t even want to watch it. I
get embarrassed about her politics.”

           
“Ah, don’t be. She’s fantastic.
And beautifully preserved.”
Ginny opened the screen door.
“Why don’t you come in for coffee?”

           
While they drank coffee Ginny filled
Serena in on the West Vale gossip, which wasn’t much. When Serena was about to
leave she offered Ginny money for caring for Pascal, but she wouldn’t take it.

           
“It’s enough of a perk that I have
someone famous living next door.”

           
“Ginny, that’s ridiculous.”

           
“It’s true. Now go see that brat of
yours. He misses you when you’re not here.”

           
When Serena had reacquainted herself
with Pascal and her house, she put away the Porsche and drove the Jeep down to
the local garage for an overhaul.

           
“Seen your program,” Lester Finch
told her as he poked around under the hood of the Jeep. “This looks about as
good as it did last spring when I looked at it. Oil change and some anti-freeze
should do it.”

           
“All right.
Shall I leave it?”

           
“You can come and get it later. Do
you want a ride home?”