Harley (West Coast Rock Star #1) (10 page)

Chapter Fourteen

Harley wiped the runaway tears off her cheeks. Any second now, her father would return. She couldn’t let him see her in this state.

How could she? How could Cade abandon her?

She thought she had finally found a friend. It might have been odd due to their age difference, but Harley genuinely considered Cade her friend, her best and only friend. But now, she’d upped and left and all Harley received was a text message. There wasn’t any real explanation. Cade only said she had to.

What about her? Did Cade even consider her feelings? Harley couldn’t even hope that she had, because if that had been the case, it simply meant Harley wasn’t important enough for Cade.

Dr. Wellington had given her the green light to leave the hospital and return to the hotel. The hotel. Not even to her home. Not even to her bedroom in Vancouver which Cade had helped her repaint and redecorate when they were still friends.

She should have known better. Friendship didn’t last for her. Friendship never truly happened for her. The only people she’d known were adults, irresponsible partiers, and celebrity wanna-bes, alcoholics, and drug addicts. They backstabbed each other and slept with each other’s partners. Much like Fiona.

The thought of her mother made Harley’s chest ache. She would return again, and this time, Cade would not be there to protect Harley.

After the incident at the Vancouver aquarium, Jax had been able to keep Fiona away from Harley, thanks to Cade. She’d been able to recover from the stress Fiona had put on her own daughter. Harley and Cade had had so much fun since then watching movies, joking around in the penthouse, exploring the city, flying to LA together, and listening to Jax’s band practices. Then, there was the rumour of Fiona threatening to take Harley back. It felt more real than the phone call that had caused her to panic because they were in LA. Whether or not Fiona had been in the city, Harley was still in Fiona’s playground. However, Cade was around and her presence made her feel safe.

When Fiona made a surprise appearance at the hotel suite, Harley had tried not to panic. She’d sent Cade text messages telling her what had gone on. When Tina hadn’t been able to compete with Fiona, she’d found Harley in the bedroom and dragged her out. Harley thought her arm would break from how hard her mother pulled on it. She waited for Cade, thinking that any second now, Cade would come bursting in and rescue her from Fiona.

But nothing like that had happened.

Cade had been out with Jax and his friends. She’d deserved to have fun for once. Even Harley had pushed her to do it. She’d had a great time helping Aunt Beth with Cade’s mini-makeover.

When Harley saw her father’s reaction to Cade, Harley’s heart swelled. She wouldn’t mind having Cade as a stepmom. She would do much better than her real mother. They’d have fun checking out museums, reading books together, even shopping—which both Cade and Harley hated—trying out new restaurants with Jax, and maybe one day, even talking about boys. Yes, Cade would have made a perfect mother for Harley.

Wishful thinking, which would never happen now that Cade left.

Harley never blamed Cade for not coming to her rescue. She was used to Fiona’s tirades, tantrums, and high-pitched wailings. And Jax had always been away. What Cade had done, disappearing without saying goodbye, hurt more than what both her parents could ever do. She had to? Why did she have to? Perhaps the love and adoration of an eight-year-old wasn’t enough to keep her.

Who was Harley to Cade but someone she had to tolerate and watch over? She wouldn’t have stayed for that. Being around a kid like her was too much work.

Harley swiped away a tear. It was done. Cade was gone and would never return. It was time for her to toughen up and be the old Harley again.

***

It broke Jax’s heart to witness his daughter quietly wiping away tears. She looked tiny in the huge hospital room, dressed up in clothes made for children younger than her. He had seen Harley’s great big personality come out when Cadence was around. He feared he wouldn’t see that again.

And it was entirely his fault.

If he hadn’t pushed and pursued Cade, she would have stayed. He’d known it from the beginning. Cade wouldn’t allow them to have a relationship, no matter how right it had felt. But he had insisted, and it had sent her packing.

He dreaded telling Harley, especially in her current condition. When he returned to the hospital from the hotel, Harley already knew. Cade must have sent her a message. Jax wasn’t sure if Cade had told Harley the reason why she’d left. If Harley knew it was because of him, his daughter hadn’t let on. Harley remained quiet while Dr. Wellington examined her. The quick, little smiles she showed weren’t real. Harley’s mask was back on and soon enough, her walls would be up again.

“You ready, munchkin?” Jax asked as he walked into the room.

Harley faced him, her eyes red-rimmed, and nodded. She slid down the bed, not bothering to ask for help.

A nurse came into the room with a wheelchair. “Hop on, sweetheart,” the nurse told Harley.

“No, thank you. I can walk,” Harley said.

“It’s the hospital’s rule, sweetheart,” the nurse insisted, patting on the wheelchair’s seat.

“It’s a stupid rule! Can’t you see I’m fine?” Harley shouted.

“Harley!” Jax couldn’t believe the anger he heard from Harley. “Don’t be rude.” Harley sent him a seething glance, but she obeyed.

What had happened to his sweet girl? He had never seen her in such a state. Jax was wrong to think that Harley would resort back to her usual quiet self. This was beyond that. She was taking Cade’s departure a lot harder. Jax could make Harley see her psychologist again but he knew she would hate him even more for that.

They made their way out of the hospital without any other incidences. Flashes erupted as paparazzi gathered around them as they walked to their car. Zee, Penny—Cade’s replacement—and a few of the hospital’s security tried to keep the photographers away.

When they were seated in the car, Harley turned away from Jax. He feared that she would stop talking to him. He must find a way to talk to Harley about Cade without upsetting her, if it was even possible.

The ride back to the hotel was spent in silence. Tina and Bruno were waiting in the suite to welcome Harley back. The rest of the gang would be showing up soon. They’d postponed practice until the next day. Bruno had asked if he’d wanted to move the dates for the concert, but Jax couldn’t do that to his band. They’d been working hard for it.

Bruno welcomed Harley with his arms stretched out, “There’s Har-dee-har-har!” Harley let Jax’s agent hug her. “How are you feeling, Harley?”

Jax was on the edge, waiting for Harley’s response. Would he see the same angst he’d witnessed earlier?

“I’m a little tired. If you all don’t mind, I’m going to rest,” Harley said in a clear tone. She was back. The mature Harley. The Harley who didn’t know how to play, who didn’t smile, or laugh, the Harley who acted like an adult.

Cade had brought out the child in her. Without Cade, would Harley ever learn to be a carefree child again? Jax could try on his own. He was Harley’s father, after all, but he had been unsuccessful before.

He followed Harley into her room. “Are you hungry? Do you want some lunch?”

Harley climbed onto the bed, shoved her feet under the thick blankets and turned away from him. “I’m fine. I’m going to nap.”

Jax sighed, slouching his shoulders forward. He felt defeated. It was one thing to fight off Fiona, or to deal with the old Harley. But when he had seen the sunshine in his daughter’s eyes, it was difficult for Jax to admit he might not see that again. He sat on the bed, stroking his daughter’s hair while she curled over a pillow.

A lump formed in his throat. He couldn’t say anything. He couldn’t say the words out loud. But he promised Harley and himself that no matter what, they would get Cade back. Even if it meant Jax had to put his own feelings aside. He would do anything for his daughter, even sacrifice his own happiness with Cade.

For the little time that he’d known Cade, he’d come to respect and adore the beautiful woman. Night after night, he had found himself thinking of her, igniting feelings that he’d thought were long gone. But not once had he considered what Harley thought, or what she would think if he pursued Cade. And never had it occurred to him that Cade wouldn’t take to his advances.

Jax had been in the limelight for far too long, blinded by the glory of it, the possibilities, the never having to hear the word ‘no.’ Now, he heard it loud and clear from Cade, and from Harley. And he felt he’d lost them both.

No matter what, he had to make things right again. For Harley’s sake. For the daughter whom he’d always love. His own heart be damned.

Chapter Fifteen

Mac slipped off his glasses and placed them on top of a folder. He appeared neither impressed nor shocked as Cade stepped into his office.

She ignored the looks she received from two of her coworkers who’d been in a meeting with Mac. Cade knew she was in trouble, she was about to find out how much. Juliette hadn’t said a word to her when Cade came in, except to relay the message from Mac to head straight to his office. Once the clock reached 8 a.m., she might be out of a job.

“Sit down,” Mac ordered, pressing his fingers together over his desk.

Cade remained on her chosen spot. “If you’re going to kick me out of here in a minute, I’d rather stand.” Her hands were clasped behind her, and her chin tilted up to show her stubborn side, just in case Mac had missed it.

“Suit yourself.” Mac huffed out a sigh. “You left in the middle of your assignment. Do you know how bad that looks for the company?”

Mac was never one to sugar coat.

“My contract states that if—” she began, but stopped when she saw Mac shake his head. He wouldn’t care what the reason was. She had left a job. A job that she’d waited for. A job that she had worked hard to get. A job to care for a young girl whom she’d had an immediate connection with. Cade had battled with herself the night before, trying to figure out which had been more important: her own goals or the relationship she had with Harley.

“You weren’t my choice for it in the first place. I knew you’d screw up.”

Cade gasped. “Then why did you put me in charge of Harley?”

“Zee convinced me you were the right person for it. I told him you weren’t ready, but he insisted. As you can tell, I’m not surprised that you’ve failed. You’re lucky I found someone to replace you right away. Penny’s back from her honeymoon and she’s just finished another job.”

Zee? Zee had wanted her to work the job? He had never even showed an ounce of belief in her. But in LA, he had warned her about the world in the limelight. It didn’t make sense to Cade. Why would Zee do that? She wasn’t even sure he actually liked her.

“When you first gave me this assignment, you told me that you chose me. Now you’re saying it was Zee’s idea and you were against it this whole time?” The older man did not change his expression. He appeared bored and uninterested until she said, “What kind of business are you running here, Mac?”

He glowered at her, but it did not deter Cade. She took a few steps forward. “I worked my ass off trying to prove that I’m good. To make sure you notice that I am just as hard working as any of the people here. I’ve gotten more bruises and muscle strains than I’ve ever had in my entire life during training. I’ve stayed longer hours than most of the desk jockeys. The first chance that I thought you finally realized I’m good enough, you’re saying that it wasn’t even your idea?”

By the time she finished, her hands gripped the edge of the massive desk, her body tilted forward, and her face was flushed red. Mac slowly pushed up and stood. At his full height, he looked intimidating. His shoulders were wide. Even at his age, Cade knew that he managed to exercise regularly and keep fit. “Why did you come here, Miss Williams?”

Cade stretched to her full height as well, and squared off her shoulders.

“Why did you come to Vancouver, leave your grandmother alone, and work for me? If you don’t believe much in my company and question my ability to run one, why are you here?”

Did she dare tell him the truth? That she wanted to know if he was her father? And what if he was? After all this time, he hadn’t shown any affection to her. He had questioned her abilities and skills, even now. Would an affirmation that Mac had an affair with her mother twenty-some years ago endear him to her?

Cade felt the hammering in her chest. She’d fallen deaf from the loud pulsating in her head. Her mouth opened, ready to say something, but Mac interjected.

“Gather your stuff. You’re out of here. I don’t have time to watch over staff who act like children.” With that, he sat back down and replaced his glasses, ignoring Cade’s fuming.

“You’re not even going to listen to the reasons why I left Harley?”

Mac didn’t bother offering her a glance. He kept reading over the file in front of him as he said, “You’re done here. Leave before I have you carried out.”

As soon as she stepped out of his office, she felt tears prickling at the corners of her eyes. She knew the whole office was focused on her at that moment. No one was talking. Had they known she would fail? Were they aware that Mac would fire her?

Swallowing back a sob, she held her head up high until she reached her desk. There were only a few things she needed to take back—a photo of her grandmother and a troll doll that she had kept for years for good luck. But she didn’t feel lucky at all. She hadn’t felt lucky in a while, ever since her father had imparted that secret in his deathbed. She carried the two items to the entrance with her. Before she pushed open the door, she glanced back at Juliette, who had tears down her face.

“We’ll talk later, okay?” Cade promised her friend. Juliette quietly nodded and wiped away her tears.

When she made it back to the street, Cade let her shoulders slump forward. The defeat had clamoured up to her throat, choking her. She pressed the back of her wrist against her mouth to keep the scream and agony inside. The heavens opened up and the rush of rain soaked her as she stood still. Was she being punished for abandoning her grandmother and Harley? Two people who had depended on her. Two people she had cared for, and whom she had let down.

***

Harley let out a sigh of relief when the light turned green before pulling out the key card from the slot. As soon as she was in the room, she tip-toed her way to the bed, what had been Cade’s bed, and laid her head on the soft pillow. She sniffed and hoped that she would smell Cade’s vanilla-scented shampoo, but the hotel had cleaned up and changed the sheets.

She hadn’t been too sure if the room was available. Cade had left days ago. Her father could have gotten rid of the room across from their suite. Harley was thankful that he hadn’t yet. This was the only way she could feel close to Cade again.

Harley missed her.

She missed the way Cade laughed at her silly little jokes, missed Cade’s fingers stroking her hair to get her to sleep. She missed having someone to talk to who would understand and never judge her. She missed the one person who had treated her like an eight-year-old, and let her be an eight-year-old.

Reaching for her cellphone in her robe pocket, she pulled up the photos of her and Cade. The tears began to run down, instantly soaking the pillow. They were having so much fun. Things were going great. Then Fiona had shown up and ruined everything. Harley had had to put up with Fiona’s antics for years. She’d had to deal with her outbursts and her tantrums, her alcoholism, her lack of care for anyone but herself. Truly, if it wasn’t for Harley, she was sure Fiona would have croaked a long time ago. But Fiona had never recognized that. This time, she had gone too far. If she hadn’t come to the hotel, Cade would still be with her. They could be watching a movie right now or eating mountains of chocolates or bowls of popcorn.

For every minute that she had spent without Cade, Harley went through a myriad of emotions. On top of that, she had analyzed the situation. At first, she had blamed herself for Cade’s departure, and then she had blamed her father. But in the end, she knew who was at fault. Fiona. Her father had often promised her that he would never let Fiona take her away. “Over my dead body,” he had said many times.

All she had to do now was let Cade know what her father was willing to do in order to keep his daughter in his custody. Even if Harley knew that Cade had left on her own, she wasn’t about to give up on the only friend she had ever had.

She dialled Cade’s number, but an electronic voice told her that the phone number was no longer available. Harley tried again and again and kept getting the same message. The floodgates re-opened and her body racked as she sobbed, continuing to press redial on her phone.
There must be some mistake
, she thought. Cade had no other number. This was the only way she could get a hold of her.
What had happened? Where had she gone?

Belatedly, she felt a presence in the room with her. She hadn’t heard the door open as she wailed. The mattress dipped beside her, and she heard her father call her name.

“Harley, what are you doing here, baby?” He stroked her hair, much like how Cade used to do, and it made Harley cry harder.

She turned to her father. Jax lifted her and sat her on his lap, holding her close to him. “I…can’t…reach…her…” she said between sobs.

Jax sighed heavily against his daughter’s hair. “Reach who?”

“Cade.”

Harley waited for her father to say something, but he stayed silent. Maybe he didn’t know the answer. Maybe he didn’t realize that Cade really had left them for good, and she had severed any ways for them to communicate. Jax continued to smooth her hair, rocking her on his lap like she was a little baby. Weeks before, she would have pushed him away, but not tonight. She needed her father more than anything. And somehow, she felt that he needed her too. It was then that she realized she wasn’t the only one who lost Cade, her father had too.

***

Jax woke up sniffing the pillow under his head. It smelled sweet. It smelled like Cade. He felt Harley stir beside him. She had fallen asleep on his lap, while she cried out for Cade. He had fallen asleep too not long after, distraught at the thought of both their losses.

When he’d gone to check on her the previous night in her bedroom, he had found an empty bed. Panic had begun to wring his stomach when he realized that Harley had disappeared. The entire day, since Cade had departed, Harley had stayed in her bedroom. He’d been thankful she hadn’t pushed away all her meals, although he’d asked her to have some more, since Dr. Wellington had informed him that Harley would need to regain her strength after the recent episode.

Jax had met Penny, Cade’s replacement. She was a sweet enough woman, slightly older than Cade, and had appeared very capable and professional. There was no mention of Cade during their meeting, as Zee briefly recounted what Penny’s previous experiences were. None had involved caring for a little girl.

“Do you have kids, Penny?” Jax had asked her.

“No, I do not.”

“Ever want any?” Jax spotted the wedding ring on the woman’s finger. Zee told him that she’d just gotten married. The question was unrelated to her job. He knew that Cade hadn’t had any experiences with kids either, yet she still managed to be great with Harley.

“Not at the moment,” Penny answered truthfully.

Jax had wondered if Cade ever wanted any kids of her own. He’d wondered if Cade would have wanted to get married. He never had the chance to ask her any of these questions, although he wasn’t sure if Cade would have been forthcoming with her replies.

Turning on his back, he propped an arm over his forehead. Jax wasn’t too sure how well Harley would take to Penny, but Penny had to be there for her, for them. If Fiona returned, he wanted to make sure Harley would be protected. He didn’t doubt that Penny would be able to handle Fiona.

He felt his phone vibrating in his jeans pocket. He pulled it out and found Bruno’s name on the screen. Jax should have been at practice that morning.

“Yeah.” He let the bitterness out, even though he knew his agent did not deserve it. It had been Jax’s idea to continue with the concert and the rehearsals.

“Hey, Jax, just checking to see if you’re coming in today.” Bruno sounded nervous. The man represented many more artists but Jax was his biggest client. Not only that, they had become friends too. Bruno was aware of all the events that had occurred. He had seen how Harley had shut down after Cade left.

The entire band had his back, Jax knew it. But everything still depended on Jax.

“I’ll be there in half an hour. I’ll just check on Harley.”

At the mention of her name, Harley slowly opened her eyes and stretched her arms and legs. She looked small and breakable, a fragile porcelain doll in pyjamas with yellow ducks on them and a fluffy pink robe.

“I’ll see you in a bit, Bruno.” Jax ended the call and reached over to give his daughter a kiss on the forehead. He wasn’t sure what to say to Harley after witnessing her breakdown last night. “You want breakfast?”

Harley shook her head.

“I have to go to rehearsal. You can come if you want, or stay here. I’ll let Penny know you’re awake.”

“Who’s Penny?” Harley asked, furrowing her brows.

Right. Jax had forgotten to mention her. “She’s your new bodyguard.”

“But I thought you said you’ll get Cade back?” Jax saw the whimper on Harley’s mouth.

“I will. I promised you that, didn’t I?” He knew he shouldn’t have, but having heard his daughter ask for Cade as she sobbed made him say it. Jax had no idea what he could do. Zee had told him that Cade had been fired from Mackinley Security, and that she had immediately left Vancouver and moved back to New Jersey within the day. Cade had obviously washed her hands of them.