Harlequin American Romance November 2014 Box Set: The SEAL's Holiday Babies\The Texan's Christmas\Cowboy for Hire\The Cowboy's Christmas Gift (22 page)

“It was like living in quicksand,” Adele said, her eyes haunted, “getting sucked further and further down each day, suffocating. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I didn't feel fit to be a mother, was afraid that what I was going through would rub off on all of you. Or, worse, that one of you could be hurt through my neglect. Savannah fell one day and when Brock noticed the bruise later, I couldn't even remember it happening. Lizzie, you explained the incident to him, but even hearing it out loud didn't jog my memory. The day remained this horrible gray blank for me. What if it had been a tumble down the stairs, or into the pool?”

Even now, so many years later, Adele looked distraught over the possibility. “I was hurting and I fled. But the very last thing I ever wanted was to cause you girls or your brother pain.”

Silence reigned at the table. Then Carly blurted, “Come to my wedding.” All eyes turned to her, surprise on more than one face at the non sequitur.

Carly squirmed in her seat. “I mentioned Tammy being there, but I don't want just the mother of the groom. The mother of the bride should be there, too.”

“Oh, I'd love to! If you're sure it won't cause too many problems...”

Lizzie and Savannah exchanged apprehensive looks. Had anyone told Brock that they were meeting with their mother? He'd been pleasant enough to Nicole when she'd been at the ranch, but she imagined he was quite different when he was angry. And he might not appreciate the ex-wife who'd abandoned her family unexpectedly attending his daughter's wedding.

After a moment's hesitation, Carly admitted, “There may be some...awkwardness. But don't most large family gatherings have a little bit of that? To be honest, Daddy doesn't know we're here now. He knows we were looking for you, though. And it's my wedding. I can invite whomever I want. If he knows what's good for him, he won't make a scene that ruins my big day.”

“I see.” Adele processed that information. “I appreciate the invitation, more than I can say, but the last thing I want to do is cause more trouble for any of you. Talk to your father first. Then, if you're still sure you want me there—”

“Before we can broach the subject of you with Daddy,” Lizzie interrupted, “there's something we have to ask you about first. The Baron Energies stock purchases.”

As Adele explained she'd bought stocks when prices were low in the spring to help build trusts for her grandchildren, Nicole began clearing dishes. She tried to make herself scarce when Adele and the girls settled in the living room and began looking at pictures, which included a few shots of Savannah's impromptu wedding and Carly trying her hand at bull riding. She was surprised when Lizzie joined her in the kitchen, where Nicole was making coffee.

“If you'd rather be out there,” Nicole said, gesturing with her chin, “I've got this covered.”

“I know. But I wanted to check on you. Has the morning sickness let up at all?”

“Hard to say. Some mornings, I feel just fine, but then a wave of nausea will hit me with no warning later in the day. I've noticed that stress and not eating anything make it worse.” It was counterintuitive—when her stomach was feeling particularly turbulent, her instinct was to avoid eating. Yet more often than not, food could help settle her tummy. “Do your sisters know I'm pregnant?”

“The only person I told was Chris. When I first found out I was having a baby, I didn't want anyone to know immediately. I kept it a secret at work for as long as I could. I understand needing time to adjust—although, I guess, in your case, you weren't caught by surprise.” Lizzie gave her a lopsided smile. “Since you planned it.”

“The funny thing is, I
was
surprised,” Nicole said. “They're constantly refining the process, but having the procedure is no guarantee that it will work.” Percentage-wise, the odds had actually been against her. The doctor had prescribed fertility drugs to her beforehand to increase the chances of successful conception. Repeated attempts would have quickly sapped her savings. “I think maybe I was too afraid to get my hopes up. When I saw the positive sign, I couldn't believe I'd been lucky enough for it to work on the first try!”

She wanted this baby so much. She just hoped she could be every bit the mother he or she deserved. “I did tell someone besides you about the baby on Sunday,” she said. “I confided in Daniel.”

“Really?” Lizzie's eyes widened. “You made it sound as if the two of you were only casual acquaintances.”

Nicole reached in the refrigerator and pulled out flavored creamer and an open carton of half-and-half. She was happy to have somewhere to look besides at Lizzie while confessing what had transpired between her and Daniel. “Well...after he kissed me, my pregnancy seemed like pertinent information.” They'd been getting along so well Sunday night that he might have asked her out if she hadn't told him. Then what? That would have made for a very awkward conversation three months down the road. Her cheeks heated at the fanciful thought. It had been only a couple of kisses; that didn't necessarily translate to lasting relationships.

Lizzie clapped her hands together. “Aha! I knew the spark I saw between the two of you wasn't my imagination. You like him.”

“Yeah, but that's a moot point. I live in San Antonio and am getting ready to have a baby. He...”
Is planning to move to Colorado.
She kept that to herself, remembering he wasn't ready to tell his siblings yet. “Doesn't want a family.”

“He doesn't?” Lizzie frowned as if this were news to her.

“I'm sure he loves Natalie,” Nicole rushed to reassure her. “I just don't think he sees himself as father material.”

“There are times I'm not sure he sees himself as brother material. He can be distant. It's too bad you aren't interested in dating him. When he was around you on Sunday, he was more open. More engaged with the rest of us.”

Because he'd been looking out for Nicole, helping her navigate a difficult conversation with the others. She was touched anew by his thoughtfulness. “He's a great guy. And a great kisser. Oops—you probably don't want to hear that.” She sighed. “Were your hormones all over the map when you were pregnant? Not just the mood swings or getting weepy, but... Never mind. I don't want to pry, or skeeve you out by lusting after your stepbrother. But if I were a different person, it would be so tempting to indulge in a fling.”

Once the baby was born, heaven knew when she'd have time to herself. It could be a long damn time before a man made her feel as Daniel had. Would she regret the missed opportunity? She wasn't sure, but this was a terrible time to ponder that question. Here she was sounding as if she wanted to use Lizzie's brother for sex.

Pressing a palm to her forehead, Nicole muttered, “Lord knows what you must think of me right now.”

Lizzie surprised her with a peal of laughter. “Honey, the night I met Chris, I picked him up in a bar for a one-night stand.” At Nicole's double take, she added, “Long story.”

One with a fairy-tale ending, judging by how happy she and Chris made each other. But Nicole knew from experience, happily-ever-afters were far rarer than storybooks would lead one to believe.

Chapter Six

Daniel stepped out of his truck and into a brisk gust of wind that sliced through his T-shirt and the lightweight athletic pants he'd chosen for PT. No matter. If today's workout was anything like the last, he'd be warmed up and sweating shortly. He welcomed the hard work and inevitable pain. At least it would help distract him from—

Nicole?

When he first glimpsed the brunette slouched on the bench with her face in her hands, he wasn't surprised by the thought that she looked like Nicole. He'd been thinking about her so much since they'd kissed goodbye a few days ago that he was beginning to imagine resemblances between her and others. The waitress who'd brought him fajitas last night reminded him of Nicole. His mail carrier looked slightly like Nicole. His buddy's golden retriever had big brown eyes that made him think of Nicole. But, apparent mental breakdown aside, the woman seated a few yards away really
did
look like Nicole.

Then she confirmed it by lowering her hands. She wasn't crying, but there was a forlorn blankness in her gaze as she stared straight ahead. She hadn't seen him yet. Actually, she didn't seem to see anything.

He took an involuntary step toward her before remembering he was already a few minutes late for therapy. He found Sierra's number in his contact list and waited while the phone rang. “Hey, this is Daniel Baron. I just wanted to give you a heads-up that I'm stuck in traffic. I'm not far away, but—”

“I'll say. I can see you through the window in the reception area, lunkhead. Is that a woman out there with you? I hope you're not blowing off physical therapy to hit on someone, 'cause I gotta tell you, your sex life would benefit from increased flexibility and strength. Women dig a full range of motion.”

“No, I'm not hitting on...” As he got closer, he saw that Nicole looked seriously upset. “Sierra, I need to cancel my appointment. Can we reschedule for tomorrow?”

“I'll check the calendar, but considering the late notice, you're still getting charged for today's session.”

“Noted.”

“Is she worth incurring my wrath?”

“Yeah.” He didn't have to think twice about the answer. “She is.”

Finally, he was close enough that the sound of his voice registered with Nicole. She whipped her head around, eyes huge in her pale face. He disconnected his call, silently apologizing to Sierra. He'd make it up to her later. This was clearly an emergency.

“Nicole? What's wrong?” Horrible possibilities loomed large in his imagination. “Is everything all right with the baby?”

An odd, strangled noise emerged from her throat. It took him a moment to realize she was laughing.

“Not
baby.
” She made the noise again, an unsettling bark of hysterical amusement. “Bab
ies.
”

“What?”

“I just had m-my ultrasound.” Her bottom lip quivered, and her eyes shone with tears about to spill over. “And the doc-doctor informed me I'm having...I'm having
twins.
He actually joked about my getting t-two for the price of one!”

After that, it was all sobs. If there were words lost in the flood, he couldn't decipher them. Daniel sat next to her with zero idea of how to respond. He didn't want to say anything that would make it worse. So he put his arm around her in a kind of sideways hug that was meant to be friendly without echoing the more intimate embraces they'd already shared.

She turned into his shoulder, and soon the material of his T-shirt clung damply to his skin. Stifling a shiver, he wondered if she'd even noticed it was cold today. How long had she been out here? Her hands were like icicles. The blouse she wore with her slacks was long-sleeved, but she didn't have on a jacket.

“Nicole? How about we go sit in my truck and talk this over, okay?”

When she nodded numbly, letting him lead her without seeming to care where they were going, he decided he might need reinforcements. He scrolled through the contacts on his phone a second time, this time stopping on Lizzie's home number.

But it was Chris who answered, which seemed unusual for a weekday afternoon. “Hello?”

“Daniel here. Is Lizzie around? I've got a female emergency.”

Pause. “Don't you need to be female to have one of those?”

“I'm with Nicole Bennett.” Daniel lowered his voice, not wanting to make her feel any more self-conscious. She, however, still seemed to be in her own world. Her crying was now interspersed with hiccups. “She's a little...emotional. I thought another woman, one who's already been through this, might be the right person to talk her off the ledge.”

There was another pause. For a second, Daniel thought they'd lost their connection.

“Lizzie
just
fell asleep,” Chris said apologetically. “She was up with Nat all night. I called to check on them during my lunch break, and she sounded so wrecked that I came home early so she could take a nap. I swore I could handle everything for a few hours. Sorry. She really needs rest.”

Daniel chewed on the inside of his cheek. “Can you ask her to call my cell when she wakes up? In the meantime, I don't suppose
you
have any advice, as the husband of a woman who's been through this?” Lizzie always seemed so composed and in charge that it was difficult to imagine her coming unhinged on a public bench, but if there'd ever been a likely occasion for that, it would have been during her pregnancy.

“If you happen to have any chocolate handy, offer her some,” Chris suggested. “You could also try giving her a hug.”

“I did that.” Sort of. He opened the passenger's door for Nicole and helped her into the truck. Then he said, “Wish me luck,” and hung up as he walked around to the driver's side.

Daniel didn't have any tissues in his truck, but there were some clean napkins from a fast-food drive-through. He handed her those and began rubbing her back as she blew her nose.

“Twins.” Her voice was a watery whisper. “I'm having twins.”

Clichés sprang to mind about double the happiness, but she didn't need platitudes right now. Besides, he doubted he'd sound very convincing. He wasn't the right guy to try to sell someone on the idea of a bigger family.

For lack of anything helpful to say, he went with the simplest thing that came to mind. “Congratulations?”

She stared at him intently as if she couldn't quite bring him into focus, then snickered a second later. “Way to say it like you mean it, cowboy.”

He was relieved by the note of wry humor in her tone. “Didn't mean to sound insincere. But I'm flying blind here, not really sure how to react.”

“That makes two of us.” Her eyes still glittered, her thick lashes spiky with tears, but she sounded more like herself. She blew her nose again. “I am so sorry. I've tried from an early age to be a low-drama person, not draw attention to myself.”

She'd mentioned on Sunday that her birth mother was a drug addict, which probably meant she'd witnessed plenty of unstable behavior. The two situations weren't comparable, though.

He shrugged. “So you had a minor blip in your poise—”

“Minor? I was practically catatonic before you walked up. Lord knows how long I would have sat there.”

“It's understandable that you'd need time to process. Hell, I'd freak out over the news that I was having
one
baby, much less two.”

“If you were having a baby, the entire medical community would freak out.”

“You know what I mean. The idea of having a kid, taking on that responsibility and trying to be a role model, is intimidating as hell.” On second thought, pointing out all the challenges she faced probably wasn't helpful.
This is why I needed Lizzie.

Nicole turned away, staring out the window. “I guess, theoretically, I recognized there was a
possibility
of twins. An increased chance of multiple births is listed as a potential side effect of the meds they gave me, but I never actually thought... Oh, God. I've been telling myself I was prepared for this, but now I feel like I'm free-falling. Two babies, all by myself. What am I going to do?”

“First, you're going to take a deep breath.” He hoped it would restore some color to her cheeks. But reminding her to breathe wasn't going to magically dissolve her anxiety.

Inspiration struck. “If you don't mind him knowing you're pregnant, I'll put you in touch with Jet. You remember his fiancée, Jasmine, right?” He'd introduced her to so many Barons and soon-to-be Barons on Sunday that her head was no doubt spinning with names and faces. “As the mother of twins herself, she should have all kinds of practical advice she can give you. Maybe the two of you can meet for lunch or something.”

“Thank you. That would be great.”

He took Nicole's hands between his, trying to warm them. “It's going to be okay,” he told her. Technically, he didn't have the right to make that promise. How did he know what was in store for her? Yet he had faith in this bright, compassionate woman who'd already survived a lot in her life. “You can do this.”

“I can do this,” she repeated tentatively.

“Now you're the one who needs to say it like she means it.”

“It'll take a few thousand times before I even come close to believing it.” She tried to smile, but it was shaky. “I'll practice on my way back to the office.”

Back to the office? The last thing he wanted to do was send her off in traffic while she was so distracted by the revelation of twins. “Can't they spare you for a couple of hours?” he asked impulsively. He had some extra clothes in the bed of the truck that he'd planned to change into after therapy, and he was almost certain there was a denim jacket she could borrow. “It's so late in the day already. What's the point in returning now?”

She glanced at the slim gold watch on her wrist. “Holy cow,
that's
the time?”

“You should text someone that you're not feeling well. Play hooky for the rest of the afternoon,” he coaxed. “You mentioned needing a Christmas tree. Did you ever find one?”

“No, I didn't get around to looking. It's been a pretty full week.”

“Today's one of those days that actually feel like winter, even in Texas.” He always thought it was easier to get in the Christmas spirit when it wasn't seventy-five degrees outside. “What if we went and picked out a tree? I don't have anywhere I have to be.” Well, except for physical therapy, but that ship had sailed. He would need to grovel to get back in Sierra's good graces. Still, despite the woman's gruff exterior, he thought she had a bigger heart than she pretended.

“I've never played hooky. I was all about straight
A
s and scholarships.”

“Then you have lost time to make up for.” He grinned. “C'mon, I'll teach you how to be bad.”

* * *

S
TANDING
UNDER
A
tarp where wreaths and refreshments were sold, Nicole sipped her hot cocoa, trying to mask her amusement over Daniel's predicament. He'd been spotted by a boy whose parents had taken him to the rodeo for his tenth birthday, a few weeks before Daniel's injury. Daniel had apparently made quite an impression, and now the boy was talking his ear off. Personally, Nicole hadn't ever spent much time at rodeos, but now she found herself wishing she could have seen Daniel ride.

When he finally broke free of his garrulous young fan, she couldn't help teasing, “I didn't realize I was agreeing to spend the afternoon with a celebrity. Should I be watching in the rearview mirror for paparazzi?”

He rolled his eyes. “You ready to hit another tree lot?”

She nodded, hoping they had better luck at the next place. The trees here, though lovely, had been way too big, impractical for the apartment she and Adele were sharing. Plus, it had dawned on Nicole that she would need to buy decorations. She didn't want to blow her entire holiday budget trying to keep an oversize tree from looking bare. Back home in San Antonio, she had a box of tasteful red and silver ornaments. The end result was a pretty display, but her trees screamed single businesswoman. There were no funky keepsake ornaments with sentimental value or miniature picture frames. She looked forward to adding personality to future Christmas trees, to making homemade decorations with her child—

Children.
When would it start to seem real and not like some weird pregnancy dream she was having? From the time they'd left the medical complex, there had been moments when Daniel made her laugh and she temporarily forgot she was the mother of twins; then it would sneak up on her all over again.

“Uh-oh.” Daniel shot her a questioning glance as they crossed the parking lot. “You got quiet. At least when you're mocking me, I know you're okay.”

“I don't know what I am,” she said honestly. “Overwhelmed, mostly. There's a part of me that's excited. I've always wanted family, and now I'm having
two
babies. But on the other hand? I'm having
two
babies!” Panic tried to once again claw its way through her.

Alone at the doctor's office, she'd fallen victim to that urge. But she wasn't alone now. With Daniel's steady gaze locked on hers, she inhaled and exhaled in slow deliberation, recalling how certain he'd sounded when he told her
“You can do this.”
She was immeasurably grateful he'd been there today.

“You're like a guardian angel,” she told him as he opened her truck door for her.

“Hardly.” His lips twisted in a guilty scowl. “A lot of the thoughts I've had near you haven't been very angelic.”

His words were like champagne in her veins, fizzy and potent, filling her with a bubbly, lighthearted joy. She hadn't expected him to flirt with her now that he knew she was pregnant. His ability to make her feel so desirable, today of all days, was a minor miracle.