Harlequin American Romance May 2014 Bundle: One Night in Texas\The Cowboy's Destiny\A Baby for the Doctor\The Bull Rider's Family (12 page)

“I was so grateful for you helping Rachel to get over our mother’s death. And I have to admit you helped me, too. I learned to laugh again and to feel joy. After our night together, I felt so much guilt because I took your innocence. You had your whole life ahead of you, and I couldn’t get beyond the fact that I had taken something that didn’t belong to me. Guilt is a powerful thing. I wanted to get as far away from you as possible because you reminded me of what had happened and what should not have happened.”

She looked at him then, her eyes a molten gold, heated by the emotions inside her. “I gave you my innocence. You didn’t take it. Let’s get that straight. I know the difference. I was not infatuated with you. I loved you with all the fervor of an eighteen-year-old girl. It was very real to me, and every time I look at Erin I know it was love.”

“Angie—”

“Make excuses for yourself, Hardy, but I know what happened that night was real.”

He kept staring into the heat of her eyes, getting lost in the sweet essence that was Angie. He used to fight it, but tonight he had to admit she was right. What they’d shared had been real. Just as real as what he was feeling right now.

He stepped close to her and cupped her face with his hands. Her skin was as smooth as anything he’d ever touched. He was always afraid to touch her, almost as if it was forbidden. He never understood why until that moment. Because she was the only woman who could make him lose himself. And he prided himself on control. Losing it for a second had brought on the guilt.

“It was real for me, too,” he whispered against her lips.

“Then why deny it?” Her breath fanned his skin, and he could feel himself being pulled back into the magic that had brought him out of the dark days of his mother’s death.

“I always felt I had to because I was older.”

She wrapped her arms around his waist, and his lips took hers in a well-remembered passion. She tasted of cinnamon and chocolate, and he knew she’d been eating something from the bakery. The sweetness changed almost immediately as the kiss deepened.

She moaned deep in her throat, and he was lost with wanting more and more. He had been denying himself for years. Just when he thought they were on the same level, she pulled away and rested her forehead on his chest for a minute. Then she stepped away.

A coolness invaded his system and the molten gold of her eyes was now tepid.

“Angie...”

She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “What are we doing, Hardy? You’re involved with Olivia. We can’t go back. We have to go forward.”

He had no idea where her head was, and he wasn’t thinking straight, either. All he knew was he wanted to be with her and he wanted to make the past right once again because he wasn’t going away.

“We can make the future better.”

“Please...”

He threw up his hands and stepped back, knowing it was time to call it a night. He was tired and so was she. He didn’t want to say anything to hurt her or change their relationship. He had to share an amicable peace with her for Erin.

“Okay. I apologize for kissing you. I was out of line, but we still have a lot to resolve about the past. But it can wait.” He tapped the paper on the table. “Tomorrow we’ll have to deal with this.”

“Thank you for bringing it over.” Her words were stilted, as if they’d never shared a passionate kiss. And then he realized she was fighting the attraction. She was right, too. He had no business kissing her.

He turned toward the door. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

She didn’t say anything, and he walked out. In the warm night air, he stood for a moment and wondered what was wrong with him. He was planning a future with one woman and kissing another. He had reached a new low.

Chapter Twelve

Angie stood in the middle of the kitchen with her fingertips touching her lips, remembering the sensual feel of Hardy’s against hers and being enclosed in a powerful aura that was him. She thought she’d forgotten the gentle touch of his hands, the passion of his lips and the power of his body against hers. But it was right there at the edge of her consciousness, waiting to remind her that some things were unforgettable.

After picking up the paper, she went to her room, showered and crawled into bed. Thoughts of Hardy plagued her. Why was it so hard for him to admit that he might have loved her back then? Maybe he thought she wanted a commitment from him now. But she had made it abundantly clear that she didn’t. And then there was Olivia. She flipped over in bed. The man was driving her crazy in more ways than one.

She wasn’t sure when she went to sleep. The buzz of her cell woke her. She fumbled around for it on the nightstand and saw it was 5:00 a.m. Who could be calling this early? She clicked it on.

“Angie, have you seen the paper?” It was Peyton.

“It’s five in the morning.”

“I know. I was up with J.W. and saw the lights of the car when they threw the paper. Of course, I had to go out and get it in my sexy nightie. Wyatt said he was going to arrest me for indecent exposure.”

Angie scooted up in bed. “Peyton, it’s five in the morning.”

“You’ve already mentioned that. I thought you wanted to read the article.”

“Hardy brought it by last night and we read it together.”

“Ah, crap, I woke you for nothing.”

“But I appreciate the gesture.”

“It was a lovely article, and you had nothing to worry about. Think I’ll wake Jody and tell her she’s not grounded anymore.”

“She’d probably be happier if you waited until about eight.”

Peyton chuckled. “I’m just happy for you. I’ll call you later.”

Angie trudged out of bed, brushed her teeth and went to the kitchen. She knew she wouldn’t be able to get back to sleep. The people of Horseshoe would have a little excitement with their breakfasts, and she needed lots of coffee to brace herself for what was to come.

* * *

W
HEN
H
ARDY
REACHED
the ranch, everything was in darkness except for the outside lights. He bounded upstairs, took a shower, slipped into a bathrobe and hurried downstairs to the kitchen. After grabbing two beers, he went outside to the pool. The night air embraced him as he stretched out on a lounge chair, sipping a beer and watching the moonlight on the water. It was relaxing.

So many feelings churned inside him. Angie seemed to know what she’d felt all those years ago, even though she had been very young. He, on the other hand, had a hard time rationalizing anything he’d felt at the time. All he knew was that he had liked her and wanted to be with her.

Erin had written that her parents were in love. The thought seemed to dance with the moonlight across the water. And then it hit him. He was afraid to admit he’d loved her because that would have required something from him more than a disappearance.

He downed the rest of the beer, not liking what he was thinking. How could Angie know what he was feeling without him even being aware of it?

Back then if he’d admitted the truth to himself, life would have been so different. But he couldn’t go back. Nor did he want to. He and Angie had to talk. She’d become so angry when he’d mentioned infatuation. He had to let her know that’s the way he had to view their relationship for him to deal with his own emotions. It was all about him and what he’d done to her. Guilt was hammering him once again.

He awoke at four and realized he was still in the lounge chair by the pool. His stiff muscles reminded him he was getting too old to sleep in lounge chairs. He went upstairs and got dressed for court. But before work, he had something to do.

He drove to the cattle guard and got the paper, which had been delivered earlier in the morning. When he returned, his dad was sitting at the kitchen table, nursing a cup of coffee. Hardy unrolled the paper and laid it in front of him.

“Thought you might like to read what your granddaughter had to say.”

His father fished his glasses from his shirt pocket and began to read. When he didn’t say anything, Hardy asked, “Well?”

The judge looked at him. “What do you want me to say?”

Hardy threw up his hands. “Nothing, Dad.” He headed for the door, but he couldn’t let it go. He swung back. “What did you say to Angie?”

“Didn’t she tell you?”

“No, but I could tell she was upset.”

The judge removed his glasses. “Yeah. I should have never gone over there.”

“Why did you?”

His father slipped the glasses back into his pocket. “I was trying to save your future.”

“What?”

“I asked her to say she lied about the girl’s paternity.”

Anger slammed into his chest. “You did what?”

“You’ve worked your whole life toward one goal, and I thought you were throwing it away. I had to do something. But then I saw the girl.”

Some of the anger left him at the anguish in his father’s voice. “And?”

“She’s your daughter.”

“I told you that. Why is it so hard for you to believe?”

“Because you’re throwing away your whole damn future!” the judge yelled in the voice known to make strong men weak. “At least, that’s the way I saw it on Sunday. Now I can’t get that little girl’s face out of my head. She has the Hollister blue eyes.”

All the anger faded as he stared at his strong father admitting he was wrong. That had to be a first.

“Yes, she has the Hollister eyes, and she is the sweetest little thing you would ever want to meet.”

The judge looked up. “When can I meet her?”

“I’ll ask Angie.”

“You know, it’s not all up to Angie. You have some say here, too.”

He took a couple of steps toward his dad. “It’s all up to Angie, and it’s all about Erin’s best interests. I will do nothing that will cause either of them any more pain or hurt. And I want you to stay away until you’re in a better frame of mind. If you want to be part of my child’s life, you have to follow the rules. My rules. And I want you to apologize to Angie.” He walked out, feeling for once that maybe he had gotten through to his father.

By seven, he was at Angie’s. He wanted to spend some time with his daughter before he went to the courthouse. Angie handed him a cup of coffee—he was getting used to having coffee with her in the mornings.

It was going to be a hot day, and Angie was dressed in shorts and a sleeveless knit top. His eyes kept straying to her slender arms and long smooth legs. Her hair was up in its usual ponytail, which bounced around when she moved. She had an energy about her that was spellbinding.

“I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings last night.” He wanted her to know that before the day crowded in on her.

She leaned against the cabinet, her breasts pressing against the taut knit top. “I’m not eighteen anymore, and it takes a lot to hurt my feelings, so you don’t have to worry about that. I can take it.”

“Tough, huh?” He grinned over the rim of his cup.

“Maybe.” She cradled her cup in her hands. “May I ask you a question?”

By the tone of her voice, he knew it was personal.
No
circled his mind, but what he said was, “Sure.”

“What happened to your marriage?”

That
he wasn’t expecting. It was personal. Private. None of her business, really, but he wanted them to be honest with each other. “I met her in Paris. She was a buyer for Neiman Marcus. We hit it off from the start, and neither of us saw the problems ahead. She traveled a great deal. I was involved in building my law career, so we rarely saw each other. It didn’t take long for us to realize it was over.” He took a deep breath and forced himself to tell the rest. “And I had a lot of unresolved issues about you.”

She lifted an eyebrow. “Me? We didn’t have any issues. We had sex. Period. You had a ton of guilt, though.”

“Okay. You were right about infatuation. I needed your feelings to be an infatuation.”

“Mmm.” She took a sip, watching him. “That way it made what we did wrong. That way you took advantage of me and my feelings. That way you could feel all the guilt that you wanted. But once you admitted that I loved you, it would change things. It would make it right and natural. But what would you do with all that guilt? You needed to feel the guilt for some reason known only to you.”

“Yeah,” he admitted.

“Now you have to admit how you really felt back then.”

He stared into her honey-brown eyes that seemed to know everything. “I thought about it last night and I know how I really felt. I’m not afraid to admit it anymore.”

She set her cup on the counter and turned slightly, as if she didn’t want to hear what he had to say. “I...”

“Mama, I hear voices. Is Mr. Hardy here?”

Angie headed toward the hall. “I’ll help her get dressed.”

And just like that, she had escaped what he was about to admit. He poured another cup and sat down, feeling hurt and not understanding why. Or maybe he did. So much had happened in the past few days, he was struggling just to keep his head on straight.

“Mr. Hardy, I thought that was you.” Erin hobbled into the kitchen, and Hardy got to his feet, wondering if she was ever going to call him anything other than Mr. Hardy.

Erin looked around the kitchen. “Isn’t the paper here?”

“I’ll get it,” Angie said and ran for the front door. Erin wanted to watch them read it, so they’d pretend for her.

The three of them sat at the table and read the article.

“What do you think?” Erin asked, beaming with excitement.

Angie kissed her cheek. “You did a great job. Now you have to prepare yourself for everyone’s reaction.”

“Don’t worry, Mama. I can handle it.”

“I’m proud of you, peanut,” Hardy told her.

“I wonder if Grandma will read it?” Erin fidgeted in her chair, obviously upset by her grandmother’s absence over the past few days.

Angie wrapped her arms around Erin from behind. “Like we said, it’s going to take a little adjusting for everyone.”

The door opened, and Patsy and Peggy burst in dressed in colorful shorts and tank tops. Their bleached and colored hair stuck out like straw, reminding Hardy of scarecrows.

“Have you seen this?” Patsy slapped the paper on the table.

“Of course, Aunt Patsy. I wrote it,” Erin answered before he or Angie could find their voices.

Patsy pulled Angie aside, but Hardy could still hear them, as could Erin. “Why did you let her do this?”

“Not that I owe you an explanation, but she wanted to. This situation hasn’t been easy for her, and she wanted to express her feelings. I allowed it. Now I’m wondering why you’re running around Horseshoe in your night clothes.”

Patsy blushed, to Hardy’s amazement. “We had a little party for Bighead and his friend last night.”

“And Mama’s worried about
me
disgracing the family,” Angie scoffed.

“You’re her favorite. She expects better from you.”

“Oh, please.”

Peggy plopped into a chair. “I have a tremendous headache. And, Patsy, you’re making it worse. I told you Angie knew.”

“Mama hasn’t been out of the house and when she reads this, we’ll never get her out of there.” Patsy placed her hands on her hips. “And it’s all your fault.” She glared at Hardy.

Something in him snapped at her rude behavior. “I’d appreciate it if you take your attitude somewhere else. You’re upsetting Erin, and that gets me upset. So if you want to take this outside, you can yell at me all you want. Let’s go.”

“Stop it!” Angie yelled. “Patsy and Peggy, go home. I’ll take care of Erin, and y’all can mind your own business. And, please, don’t come back until you learn some manners.”

Patsy touched her forehead and frowned. “I’m half-asleep and I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“I’ll buy that,” Angie said, taking her sister’s arm and pushing her toward the door.

Patsy ran back and hugged Erin. “I’m sorry, Cupcake.”

Erin didn’t respond. Hardy’s temper rose at what this was doing to his daughter.

Angie quickly got her sisters out of the house and sat down by Erin. “Sweetie, she didn’t mean anything. She just worries about you.”

Erin reached for her crutches and went into the living room. Angie looked at him, and he shrugged. Then they both followed her. Erin sat on the sofa, tears rolling down her cheeks.

Hardy’s heart constricted at the sight. Angie sat on one side of her and he on the other. Angie wrapped her arms around their daughter.

“Hey, hey, what are all the tears about?”

“Everybody hates me.”

Angie kissed Erin’s forehead. “No, they don’t, baby. They love you.”

“Grandma doesn’t. She won’t even come over here anymore. And Grandpa Hollister won’t even speak to me. What did I do wrong?”

Hardy could barely stand it. He wrapped his arms around her, too, trying to give her some comfort. “Listen to me. You’ve done nothing wrong, and I don’t want you to feel that way. Your mother loves you. I love you. So please put a smile on your face or I’m going to start crying, too.”

Erin hiccuped and a giggle bubbled through. Suddenly, she wrapped her little arms around his waist. “I love you, too, Daddy.”

His heart stopped completely. He looked into Angie’s tear-filled eyes and the world tilted. Maybe for the first time in the right direction. He kissed the top of Erin’s head. “No matter what happens today, we’re in this together. I’m always going to be here for you now. Remember that, and don’t let anyone steal your joy at finding your father. Because then I’ll have to beat them to a pulp.”

Erin giggled and wiped away tears.

“You okay?” he asked.

His cell buzzed and he cursed to himself, but he pulled it out and saw it was his secretary. “Work is calling.”

“It’s okay,” Erin said.

He ignored it. His daughter needed him. His cell buzzed again. Wyatt this time.
Damn it!
He had a trial about to start and had to face his responsibilities to the county. He was the D.A.