Hard Break (Deadlines & Diamonds, #5) (18 page)

“I know what you mean.”

Ian opened his eyes.

Chase grinned down at him. “I’m not a baby, Ian. And I know what it means when you say you’d die for me. I love you too. But don’t lie to me.”

“I didn’t lie to you, Chase.”

Now the kid’s eyes got misty. “You can’t promise you’re not going to die. And you can’t promise you’re not going anywhere. My dad promised that all the time. I know that promise is a lie.” He shrugged. “People die. It’s what happens.”

Ian stared at the ten-year-old, believing this kid was way older than his years. An old soul as his own mother used to say.

“I’m not going anywhere, not if I can help it. How’s that?”

Chase smiled. “I can live with that.”

“Come on, we’d better get this kitchen cleaned up before the girls come down lookin’ for us.”

“Good idea.”

Chase stood and together they gathered the dishes, putting them in the sink. Ian pitched Chase a damp washcloth to wipe down the table, while he used another one to clean the counters. Chase emptied the dishwasher and Ian rinsed all the dishes. One dish at a time, they filled the dishwasher. After Ian tossed in a Cascade gel pack, Chase closed the door and pushed the ‘wash’ button. Chase extended his fist and Ian bumped the knuckles.

“What book you reading these days?”

Chase lifted a single shoulder. “I don’t the name of it, but it’s about zombies. It’s pretty good. There are three in the series, I think. I’ll probably read the next one. They’re good for my AR goal.”

“AR?”

“Accelerated Reading.” Chase rolled his eyes. “Every book has points. Each quarter my teacher gives me a goal and I have to read enough to reach that goal.”

“Huh.” Geez. When Ian’d gone to school, they counted pages, or some shit.

“Oh.” Chase stopped in the middle of the staircase, shot a glance to the top. He climbed one more step, putting them nearly face to face. “If you haven’t told my mom, and she hasn’t told you, don’t you two dorks think you ought to say something?”

Ian laughed. “I plan to tonight, after you guys are in bed.”

Chase yawned big, stretched his arms to the ceiling. “I’m really tired.”

“Go.” Ian chuckled all the way to the girls’ room, where he found all three of his girls sound asleep.

Twenty

“W
ell,
that
sucks.”

Yeah, it did. “She needs her sleep tonight
, big man.”

“You gotta tell her, Ian.”

“I will. Tomorrow.”

Chase put his hands on his hips. “No, Ian, you gotta tell her tonight.”

He ruffled the blonde head. “It’ll be okay. I promise you I’ll tell her tomorrow.” At the open mouth, he said, “I promise to keep that promise.”

Chase frowned.

“Now you head to bed. I’ll get everybody tucked in for the night and—”

“Are you gonna leave Mom here or—”

“I was going to throw a blanket over her, yeah.”

Chase shook his head. “No. The mattress hurts her back. You have to take her to her own bed. It’s got a number or something.”

Ian chuckled. “I’ll make sure she gets to her own bed. Now, get to yours.”

He grinned. “Okay. Goodnight, Ian. I’m glad you love us. I love you, too.”

“’Night, Chase.”

Ian went to Penelope first. He kissed his fingertips before brushing a lock of hair away fr
om her forehead. “Sleep tight, princess.”

He then went to Sadie’s bed. Kayla lay on the edge closest to him. He leaned over her and tugged the blanket up
the small torso. “Night, night, sweet Sadie.”

Gazing at the woman he loved, Ian ached to speak the words that would change his life forever. One way or the other. He didn’t
think
she’d kick him to the curb, tossing his broken heart into the gutter next to him. But when it came to Kayla Black, Ian wasn’t one hundred percent sure of anything.

She’d ping-ponged way to
o much the last ten months. Not that he blamed her. Fact was fact. And the fact was she held his heart in her hand. If she decided to squish it, at least he wouldn’t be the only one heartbroken. He and Chase could commiserate.

He eased an arm under Kayla’s neck and one under her knees. He lifted her into his body, carrying her from the room, catching the light with his elbow.

Inside her room, he laid her down on her side of the bed. He slipped her shoes from her feet and pulled the covers up her body. She stirred awake, blinking him into focus.

“
Hi. I’m sorry I fell asleep.”

Oh
, man, she was beautiful. “You’ve been burning the candle at both ends for a long time now. It’s time for you to let someone help you. Let me
help you.”

She sat up and wiped at her eyes. “You’ve been helping me all along, Ian, whether I wanted you to or not.”

“That’s what friends are for.” Damn, he wanted to tell her how he felt, to just throw his heart and soul at her mercy, but now was not the time. He wanted her wide awake for that conversation.

“I wanted to talk to you.”

He groaned. “That doesn’t sound good.”

“I actually think it’s very good.” She turned until her feet dangled over the side of the bed. “I think we really need to talk. About us.”

“And I think you’re right.” He sat down next to her on the bed. “But you’re exhausted, and it’s nearing my bedtime. Let’s make a date for tomorrow.”

“You’re going to make me wait until tomorrow?”

“Yep. I want both of us with a clear head before I…yeah, it’s best we have clear heads.”

Kayla just stared at him. He rubbed at his head, making sure he still had only one
attached to his shoulders.

“You’re serious,” she asked.

“As a heart attack.”

Her response shocked the ever living shit out of him. She hopped up onto her knees, grabbed his face between her palms and planted a kiss on his lips. The momentum knocked them backward, but she didn’t relent. Clumsy turned frenzied as her tongue slid
over his lips, dipping into his mouth.

She tasted of toothpaste and woman. His woman. She arched against him, bringing her breasts in contact with his chest. Just barely. He guessed only her nipples grazed him. He moaned and thrust his tongue deep into her mouth.

Holy shit, maybe he was the one who’d fallen asleep.
Please don’t ever wake me up.

He moved his hands over her back, down to the curve of the ass he’d dreamed about but never touched. He circled around each cheek, drifting down onto her thighs. She must have taken the motion as invitation because, before he knew it, she straddled him.

Her kisses were unrelenting, an attack to his lips, his face, his senses. Dammit, he was so hard, he might explode right there in his boxers. If he didn’t put an end to this right here, right now, he’d toss her onto her back and bury himself before they’d even thought about locking the door.

Putting both hands on her shoulders he eased her away. The look of desire mingled with disappointment and Ian had to admit
to being pretty damned satisfied. And frustrated. His entire body protested what he was about to do.

“We need to stop,” he panted.

“I know,” she breathed.

“
We really need to talk before we do any more of this.”

“I know.” She climbed off
him, rubbing herself against his swollen groin.

He grunted, cursed.
Whether the movement was intentional or not, Ian wasn’t sure. Either way, it didn’t matter, because it was excruciating.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it.” He sat then stood, turning to adjust himself. Not that the tuck and smooth had anything to do with hiding. She’d have to be completely blind to miss the effect she had on him, but he could at least try to ease some of his own discomfort.

When he turned, she was under the covers. She
scooted down and brought the sheet up to her shoulder before lying down on her side, facing him.

“Sleep well, beautiful lady.” He kissed her forehead, easing back to find her blushing.

“You’ve never called me that before.”

“Of course I have, just not loud enough you could hear me.” He stepped away, not trusting himself to be near her any longer. “You get some sleep. We’ll talk tomorrow.”

He got all the way to the door before she said, “Ian.”

He stopped and turned around. She’d propped herself up on an elbow. “There’s one thing you should know before you leave.”

“What’s that?”

She drew in a d
eep breath, closed her eyes. “I love you.”

Those words, the three most powerful words in the English language,
flayed him. He’d expected to have to say them first, and hearing them on her lips, muttered first, without coercion or
oh geez, I gotta respond to his feelings somehow
. He could slay dragons in this moment, he was sure of it.

Want
ing to kiss her, knowing it’d lead to things they might not be ready for, he put his hand on his heart, bowed his head and whispered, “I love you too,” before walking out of her bedroom, down the stairs and out into the night.

There was no way in hell he’d sleep tonight. And—he laughed at the moon—he couldn’t be happier about the deprivation.

G
ood grief. Kayla had decided six o’clock would never arrive. She’d gotten the text from Ian saying all the kids were home and safe. No lovey-dovey words. Which was fine. He’d said them.

He loved her.

No more doubt.

Except for the
holy crap, I’m so much older
doubts she wasn’t sure she’d ever kick. Ten years was a long time. She was in fifth grade he was born. And he was finishing kindergarten when she was graduating high school. That made her shudder. The
ew!
factor when she put it in those terms was enough to have her searching for the nearest garbage can.

She couldn’t allow herself to think of it. Obviously Ian wasn’t. Or maybe he just hadn’t. 

What if he woke up one day and decided she was too old, decided he needed a younger model? Like Denali.

Bringing her palm to her forehead, she gave herself a good
hard knock. She needed to not be such an idiot. If she’d learned one thing from Leon’s death, she needed to live for today, because tomorrow may never come. And she wouldn’t go another day without telling Ian McCallister how much she loved him.

They had a date.
Tonight. And she planned to take control of the situation. No more pussy-footing around. She’d take the bull by the horns and officially give her heart to the man who held it in his strong palms.

Finally the big hand topped out at the twelve while the small one pointed to the six
. She forwarded the phones to the answering service and gathered her things. Rushing to her car, she turned the radio up to avoid the unavoidable. She needed to stay out of her own head. She’d analyzed and over analyzed the situation all day. She’d even jotted down notes about what she wanted to say.

Some things needed to be said right the first time.
Just blurting
I love you
out while the guy was trying to run from the bedroom wasn’t exactly at the top of her list. But she couldn’t let him leave last night without hearing what’d been on the end of her tongue all evening.

And hey, he’d said it back.

She sang along to the radio, watched the morons who couldn’t follow the giant green directional signs. Did they really not see that they needed to exit until thirty feet before said exit? People never ceased to amaze her.

When her exit came, she exited the freeway
—from the right lane, thank you very much—then it was a few miles, a couple turns and
voila!
she was home.

Pulling into the garage, she hoped tonight would follow last night’s routine. She was a little too excited to play maid, chef and tutor. She most certainly didn’t expect what she found when she opened the
kitchen door.

The room was in near darkness and virtual silence. She dropped her bag to the floor. The closing door banged much louder than normal. She stepped forward, surprised to see Ian step out from the shadows.

“Welcome home.”

She giggled, sounding much like Sadie. “What’s going on?”

“We have a date.”

“I thought it’d be after the kids went to bed.”

“I know.” He walked up until he stood in front of her in his black slacks and white button-down. “I wanted to catch you off guard.”

“Why?”

He shrugged, taking her hand. “Call me spontaneous.”

“That’s not a very sexy nickname, but whatever floats your boat.”

“Ha. You’re a funny girl.” He guided her over to the table, pulling her chair out and holding it while she sat.

“Where are the kids?”

“Upstairs.”

She shot a glance a
t the ceiling. “Will they be joining us?”

He grinned. “Not a chance.”

“What’d you do, bribe them?”

He laughed. “A little pizza, payment and the promise of ice cream goes a very long way.”

“You’re
paying
my children to leave us alone?” She didn’t know whether to be mortified or proud.

“We’ve got some very important things to discuss tonight. We need a little privacy.” He shrugged. “So, yeah,
I’m paying the kids to leave us alone.”

She
noticed he said ‘the’ instead of referring to the kids as hers. She kinda liked that, although she wasn’t quite sure why the distinction mattered. The kids were hers.

The bribing clarified and
settled, he went over to the counter, picked up three large take-out containers. Bringing them over, he slid it all between the two place settings.

“Hot dogs again?”

He lifted the lids. “Buca di Beppo.”

There were her favor
ites: chicken spinach salad, chicken parmigiana, and chocolate chip cannoli. Her mouth started to water. “Are you trying to spoil me?”

He rushed to
the sink, returning with a bottle of wine. The thing dripped water all over the table cloth. “Nope. I’m trying to get you drunk.”

“Awesome. Just what the kids need to see after you go home.”

He frowned, but didn’t respond to her statement. “We’d better eat before this gets cold.”

She spooned some of each onto her plate, although the first thing to her mouth was the cannoli.

“Why am I not surprised?” Ian asked with a chuckle.

“What?” she said after swallowing.

“Penelope asked if she could have her ice cream before her dinner. It would only make sense she learned that trick by watching her mother.”

“What can I say
? She’s her mother’s daughter.” She took another bite, cream rushed into her mouth and she moaned, letting her eyes drift closed.

Something touched the corner of her mouth and
she jumped, her eyes flipping open in time to see Ian lift his finger to his mouth and lick the cream from it. Whoa, that was the most erotic thing she’d ever seen. She might just have an orgasm sitting in this chair without Ian having only barely touched her.