Happy (20 page)

and he wasn’t nearly drunk enough yet. He turned and headed back to the

kitchen, leaving Demetra to her drama. A few minutes later, she joined him.

She flipped on the overhead light, and he blinked at the brightness.

“I wish you hadn’t seen that,” she said.

“Me too,” Louie mumbled. “Not exactly thrilled with some guy

grabbing my sister’s ass.”

“It’s not what you think?”

“Yeah? I’m pretty sure it’s exactly what I think.”

Demetra’s face turned crimson. “Any more in the fridge?” she asked,

gesturing to his fresh beer.

“Nope. Last one.” Louie hesitated and then slid the bottle across the

table. She looked like she could use a drink right about now. She chugged it

back. “Very ladylike. I can see why Andre likes you.”

“Shut up.” Demetra let out an equally unladylike belch. “I guess it’s

time to tell Peter.”

“Don’t bother. He already knows.”

“What? You told him?”

“That you’re sleeping around? You haven’t exactly been subtle

about it.”

She paled. “How did you—? It’s not like that.”

“Look, whatever screwed up, sitcom-worthy arrangement you’ve

got with Peter, leave me out of it.” Louie didn’t want to talk or think about

Peter.“He told you about that?” She seemed surprised. “It was dumb. I don’t

know why we thought we could pull it off. But I guess it doesn’t matter

now. I think it’s time to end it.” She flopped forward and laid her head on

the table. “That’s why he’s been so anxious to talk to me, isn’t it?”

Happy |
Chris Scully

116

Guilt made Louie turn away. “Why ask me?” he snapped. “I don’t

know what the hell Peter wants. I don’t think
Peter
knows what he wants.”

He couldn’t help the note of bitterness that crept into his voice at the end.

Damn, he wished they had more beer.

He got up and began searching through cupboards in the hopes of

finding a forgotten bottle of something, anything, to wipe out this ache in

his chest.

Demetra fell silent, and when he looked to see why, she had her head

buried in her folded arms. “I love him, Louie,” she said, sounding all teary

and muffled. “I love him and I don’t know what to do.”

His heart stopped. “Peter?”

Her head jerked up. “No. Andre, dummy.”

The relief left him a bit light-headed. He’d never seen Demetra like

this, with her eyes pleading and voice trembling. Usually she was all drama.

But this was real.

Louie sat back down next to her. They had never truly had a close

brother-sister bond, and so he felt a little awkward as he put his arm around

her shoulders. “If you really love someone, Dee, you can’t pick and choose

what parts of your life to share with them.”

“I know,” she sniffled. “That’s what Andre says too.” She wiped self-

consciously at her cheeks. “But… it’s not easy. I’m so afraid of what Mom

and Dad will think. They won’t understand. They want me to marry a Greek

boy and settle down. And I’ve tried—I’ve really tried. But that’s not what

I
want. I never realized how bad it must have been for you. What if they

disown me?”

“I’m the last person you should go to for advice. It’s got to be your call.”

“Love sucks.”

“Yeah. It does.”

She heaved a sigh. “I’ll call Peter.”

“You might want to wait. His dad’s in the hospital.”

“How do you know that?”

“I was there with him earlier tonight.” He didn’t mention he’d been

ordered to leave.

Demetra’s head swung around to face him. Her eyes narrowed. She

stared hard at him until Louie started to sweat. Sibling loyalty tugged at his

conscience. He should tell her she wasn’t the only one hiding secrets in their

relationship, but he was too damned embarrassed now.

Happy |
Chris Scully

117

“No way,” she gasped suddenly. “You like him. You
really
like him,

don’t you.”

Louie couldn’t hide his reaction. It hurt too much. She reached over

and touched his arm. Now it was her turn to comfort him. “Oh, Louie. I’m

so sorry.”

“It doesn’t matter now,” he said, trying to convince himself as much

as her. “I can’t be with someone who’s afraid to even be seen together.”

Demetra’s eyes went wide again, and Louie realized what he’d just

revealed. “Are you saying…? You mean you guys….”

The heat raced up his neck. He jumped to his feet.

“I knew it,” she cried. “All my friends kept telling me Peter was gay.”

Shit, now the rumors would really fly. “I don’t know that he is, Dee.”

“Hello, thirty-two and no girlfriend. And he never tried anything with

me. At the very least he’s bi.”

“He’s a coward is what he is.”

“If you think that, you don’t know Peter at all.”

“How can you defend him? He used you.”

“It was
me
, Louie. The whole thing was
my
idea. Peter was actually

prepared to give it a shot when they set us up, but I didn’t want to because I

was already sort of seeing Andre.” She slapped a hand on the tabletop. “Are

you sure there’s no more beer?”

Louie kept quiet. He stared at her in astonishment as she began to

chuckle. “You think this is funny?”

“N-no,” she gasped in between giggles. “It’s a fucking mess. But I

keep picturing Mom and Dad when I tell them about Andre. And when you

tell them you’re dating my ex-boyfriend.”

“I’m not—” he began to protest, but what was the point? Demetra

would think what she wanted. She always did. But when he pictured the

scenario she outlined, he couldn’t help but join in. He had to laugh or else

he might cry.

Demetra wiped her eyes as the laughter dwindled. “Hey, do you want

some help moving your stuff today?”

Louie blinked. He’d completely forgotten about the new apartment

and that Peter had promised to help him move in. He could do it himself—

he only had one or two carloads—but he’d prefer the company. “I’d love

it,” he replied.

“In that case,” Demetra said. “I think we’d better sober up.”

THIRTEEN

“Where’s Louie? I thought he’d be here,” Adam said as he handed Peter

the extra-large coffee.

“It’s complicated,” he replied, not meeting his friend’s gaze as he

sipped. Adam had made a special coffee run down the block, and Peter

savored the results. This was way better than the hospital cafeteria brew

he’d drunk earlier.

He’d taken Ma home last night—or rather early this morning—

showered, changed clothes, and been back at the hospital in time to see

Pop taken into surgery. There had been no time for sleep, supposing he’d

been able to. He’d barely had a second to catch his breath, let alone clear

his head. Five hours later, they were still waiting for an update. Only

now that the adrenaline was wearing off were things starting to sink in.

He should have been helping Louie move today, but instead he was here.

Alone.Adam and Joe had arrived not long ago, and he was grateful for the

company. Louie would probably be there too, if Peter hadn’t messed things

up so badly.

Something must have shown on his face.

“What did you do?” Joe asked from Peter’s left. “You fucked it up,

didn’t you?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You and Louie.”

“There is no ‘me and Louie,’” he retorted.

“Obviously,” Joe bit out.

Adam sat down in the chair to Peter’s right. “Do you want to talk

about it?”

“About what?” he asked, deliberately obtuse. He glanced at the clock

on the wall. Shouldn’t they have heard something by now? Maybe Ma had

the right idea going to the hospital chapel. At least there he’d get some

peace.“About whatever is going on with you two?” Adam continued.

Happy |
Chris Scully

119

“Nope. Don’t want to talk about it. And there’s nothing going on.”

“I told you he didn’t have the balls,” Joe said over his head to Adam.

“I’m right here, you know,” Peter snapped. Somehow, knowing they’d

talked about him made him feel worse, like a problem child whose parents

had given up hope.

“I’m pretty sure he was into you,” Adam mused. “And I
know
you

were into him….”

“Oh my God.” Peter covered his face with his hands. “Could we not

do this now? My dad is in surgery. You guys are heartless.”

Adam continued as if he’d never spoken. “That day we all played

tennis? I haven’t seen you so… happy in years.”

Peter jumped to his feet. “For the last time, there’s nothing—”
Nothing

there
, he’d been about to say. But the words stuck in his throat because of

course there was something there. Something life altering. Something he’d

never really felt before.

He stared at his two friends. They exchanged a concerned look.

“Dammit,” Peter groaned and flung himself back down in the chair. “I

hate it when you do that.”

Adam squinted. “What?”

“That mind-meld thing you guys do. The way you talk to each other

without speaking.” He sounded crazy now, but fuck he was jealous. Jealous

of that bond—that Adam had someone who knew him so well he didn’t

even have to speak.

“It doesn’t matter now anyway. I messed up.” To his surprise he felt

tears burn the back of his eyes. The look on Louie’s face last night, when

he’d told him to go home, haunted him. Louie thought he was going back to

the way things were, that the other night had been a one-off, but he hadn’t

meant that at all. Or had he?

“I hate to break it to you, Petey, but we all mess up. What matters is

what you do about it,” Joe said, putting an arm around his shoulders. “We

only want you to be happy. I’ve watched you bury your head in the sand for

ten years. Someone upstairs is trying to tell you something, dumbass. I’ll be

damned if I let you ignore it again.”

Peter snapped his head up. “What are you talking—? Oh.” Joe
did

remember that night in college. He looked quickly at Adam to gauge his

reaction. He didn’t seem too surprised.

“He knows,” Joe added. “We don’t have any secrets from each other.”

Happy |
Chris Scully

120

Judging by Adam’s smile, he wasn’t the least bit threatened either.

“Look, if it’s not Louie, that’s fine,” he said. “Just be honest with yourself

about what you want. Trust me, you’ll feel better.”

“What if I don’t know what I want?” Peter asked.

Adam’s stare branded him a liar.

His mother chose that moment to return to the waiting room,

accompanied by Mrs. Vassiliou from down the block. Tina wasn’t exactly

hostile, but she’d barely spoken since catching him in Louie’s arms last

night. He’d tried to bring it up this morning in the car, but she’d only held

up a hand and said, “I saw nothing. I say nothing to Demetra.” He should

have told her the truth then and there, but instead he’d kept silent. Now he

felt a little like he’d betrayed both Louie and Demetra.

Time blurred. Peter tried to focus on his father’s surgery and not to

think about how he’d left things with Louie, but his guilt and fear never

stayed away for long. At some point he would have to make a decision—

supposing there was still a decision to make. Was he ready to change his

life like that?

On one of Joe’s coffee runs, when Adam and Peter were alone in the

waiting room, Peter finally broached the subject. “Can I ask you something?”

Adam lowered the magazine he was reading. “That sounds serious.

Hit me.”

“You dated women before Joe, right? How did you know Joe was ‘the

one’? That he was worth the sacrifice?”

“Joe was always ‘the one’—I just didn’t want to see it.” Adam chuckled

when Peter rolled his eyes. “Okay, okay, I think I know where this is going.

When it came down to it, Joe was the person I wanted to be with. All the time.

Even sitting next to him, doing nothing, made me happier than I’d been with

anyone else. No one ever came close.” His gaze grew serious. “I didn’t give

anything up to be with him—I
got
more than I ever wanted. There was no

sacrifice for me, Peter. I guess that’s how I finally knew.”

Peter swallowed. When Joe returned, he accepted the coffee and

sipped it silently, his mind churning. After that, he must have napped for

a while because the next time he opened his eyes, Annie was there. He’d

texted her this morning and asked if she could open up today.

“Who’s minding the restaurant?” were the first words out of his mouth.

“Fuck the restaurant, Peter,” she grunted. “The world’s not going

to end because some stoner can’t get his souvlaki. Some things are more

Happy |
Chris Scully

121

important. We are closed for a family emergency.” She gripped Peter by

his shirtfront and gave him a shake. Her kohl-rimmed eyes shone. “’Cause

we’re a family, dummy. Got that?”

He nodded, more touched than he knew how to express.

“But where’s your hunky shadow?” she asked, scanning the room.

“Oh, for the love of—”

“Georgiou?” The scrub-clad doctor took them by surprise. They all

rose in unison as if given some invisible signal. Peter’s breath caught in his