Hannah's Journey (10 page)

Slowly and without meeting his eyes, Hannah slipped her fingers over the back of his hand. She was barely touching him and yet he felt a warmth radiating from that contact that made it impossible not to want to turn his palm face up and entwine his fingers with hers.

“Shall we pray?” Gunther intoned and as he and
Pleasant closed their eyes, Levi risked a look at Hannah. Her eyes were as wide open as his were and did not waver as she met his gaze. To his surprise, she seemed to be trying to come to some decision about him.

Levi was not used to being judged by others. With his wealth and position in the community, more often than not, others sought to get something from him. But Hannah was different. When Hannah looked at him it was not for the purpose of trying to find the best way to curry his favor. No. Levi knew that expression because he’d seen it often enough staring back at him from his shaving mirror. Hannah Goodloe was trying to figure him out.

G
unther was not pleased. And Hannah was surprised to realize that Pleasant was no more anxious to move out of Levi’s luxurious private car than Gunther was to approve the idea of the two women traveling with the other women of the company.

“But now that we are employees,” she argued, “it seems only fair that we have no better accommodations than the others. You were right to ask to stay with Hans when we first arrived, Gunther. Pleasant and I should have done the same.”

“But Hans is different,” Pleasant protested.

“How so?” Hannah asked, genuinely perplexed by the idea.

“He’s—well, that is, his work is more…”

“These people are good people, Hannah,” Gunther interrupted. “I realize that. But they have chosen a profession that does not fit with our ways. They don’t mean to, I’m sure, but their ways could pose unnecessary temptations before you and Pleasant.”

“I don’t see how.”

“As one example there’s the issue of making them
selves up every day. Taking great pride in how they look to others.”

“They are performers,” Hannah argued.

“And yet I see the women continuing to wear their makeup when not performing. And the way they dress…” Gunther shook his head.

“And what does it say for us that we continue to live here? Is that not also prideful?” She saw that Gunther was wavering and pressed her point. “It’s only for a week,” she said. “Then we’ll be in Wisconsin.”

“Your daughter-in-law makes a good point,” Levi said as he stepped out onto the observation platform where the Goodloes had been holding their conversation.

Hannah could not believe what she was hearing. Levi confused her so—the way he looked at her when he thought she wasn’t aware and the ways he seemed to find to be near her. Jake had commented twice on how much more often Levi was showing up unannounced in the payroll car during the day. Now this. As if he couldn’t wait to be rid of them—of her.

“It would be a great help to me if you would agree to the new arrangements, sir,” Levi continued. “When people are living in such close quarters as this company does and when the stresses of the daily schedule begin to wear on them, there can be problems. Right now I just need to keep a lid on everything until we can reach Wisconsin and folks can spread out a bit for the next few months.”

“I cannot see how my daughters moving in with the women of the company will make much difference,” Gunther said.

“Oh, but it will. It will also help to have the three of
you take meals with the rest of the company. You see, while it is not your way to give in to petty jealousies, that particular malady runs rampant in a situation like this. If your daughter and daughter-in-law were to show that they expect no special treatment, it would calm the rumblings of several ladies who are beginning to think they deserve more.”

“I suppose there’s no real harm,” Gunther said more to himself than to the others. “There’s no fraternizing between the sleeping cars?”

“I don’t allow that,” Levi assured him. “In fact, it’s grounds for dismissal and believe me, Lily Palmer would be the first to raise the alarm.”

All eyes were riveted on Gunther as he wrestled with his decision. “And we’ll reach Wisconsin in a week?”

“Ten days,” Levi corrected.

“We’re still going to offer grace before meals,” Gunther said in a tone that showed he was daring Levi to cross him on that point.

“I would expect so, sir.”

Hannah saw that her father-in-law had run out of arguing points and yet she held her breath waiting for his final answer.

“All right then,” Gunther said. “Let’s get you two women packed up and moved in while the others are doing the matinee. The less fuss there is surrounding this, the better.”

“Very wise,” Levi said. “I’ll leave you to your packing, then.” He extended a hand to Gunther. “Thank you, sir.”

Solemnly, the two men shook hands while Pleasant practically fled down the passageway to their cabin and Hannah wondered why she felt such sadness that she
would no longer be sharing her meals with Levi. After all, hadn’t she begun this campaign for the real purpose of distancing herself from him?

“Yes, thank you, Levi,” she said, determined to put her regrets behind her. She had no clue why he had been so supportive. Perhaps she had misread his interest in them—in her.
Sheer vanity,
she thought, and prayed silently for the will to resist such worldly ways in the future.

It was done. The solution to his problem with Hannah Goodloe had been provided by the woman herself. Probably an indication that she was alarmed at the growing attention he paid her. Levi could not believe it when he overheard her making a case to move with Pleasant to the women’s sleeping car.

He hadn’t intentionally listened in on the family discussion, but after all, this was his private car—his residence when traveling. They were his guests and also his employees now. Yes, he had every right to eavesdrop on such a conversation. And when it had looked as if Gunther would stand firm against the idea, he had stepped in.

Relieved to have spent his last sleepless night thinking of Hannah just two doors away from his own cabin, he left the Goodloe women to their packing and headed over to the resting tent where performers waited for their act to be called. Lily was there as he had expected.

“The Goodloe women are moving into the women’s dorm car,” he said, grateful that for the moment, Lily was the only performer in the tent.

Lily paused in the series of stretches she routinely
performed as a warm-up for her act and glanced up at him. “And hello to you, too, Levi.”

He ignored her sarcasm. “You’ll make sure they have what they need?”

“That depends.”

“On what?” he snapped impatiently.

“On whether you want them to be settled in as one of the gang or as special.”

“You know what I mean. They are different—their ways are different and I just don’t want…”

“We’re not going to embarrass them, Levi,” Lily interrupted. “Or you.”

“That’s not…”

“Then stop acting like it is. If you want us to put on a show for Hannah and Pleasant then I’m afraid you’re going to be disappointed. We’re all tired and anxious to get back home to Wisconsin. I’m pretty sure Hannah understands
our ways.
”

“Are you mocking me?”

“A little bit. Sometimes you need to get down off your high horse.”

Levi smiled. “All right, I deserved that.”

Lily went back to her stretching. “Jake tells me that Hannah’s caught on to stuff real quick over in the office.”

“He’s right. In just a couple of days she’s already done all the filing and caught up with the ledger entries. I may have to start looking for things to keep her busy over the next ten days.”

“Don’t be too hard on her, Levi. You’re the one who’s gone sweet on her, not the other way around.” He opened his mouth to protest but Lily wasn’t done. “Oh, don’t give me that look. You’re as transparent as
a pane of glass when it comes to trying to hide your feelings.”

Levi perched on the edge of a chair, his hands hanging between his knees as he watched her finish her warm-up exercises. “It’s that obvious?”

“To me,” Lily said. “I doubt others have noticed. Every body’s pretty single-minded about getting through each day and getting home right now, so they’re fairly wrapped up in themselves.”

“It’s an impossible situation,” he muttered.

“You like her. She likes you. Pretty simple, really.”

“She’s Amish.”

Lily sat up and wrapped a towel around her neck. “So were you once upon a time.”

If she had suddenly announced that she was off to join a nunnery, Levi could not have been more shocked. “How do you…”

“Everybody knows, Levi. You’re hardly immune to gossip and speculation. People talk and when you showed up in Jonesville with three Amish people along with you, tongues really started to wag.”

“Well, I’m not Amish anymore—haven’t been since I was a kid.”

“But your brother and sisters are and you could go back to it, right?”

Levi looked at her incredulously. “Oh, yeah, sure. I could just say I took a little time off to build a fortune by doing circus shows around the country—a profession that would not exactly endear me to the clan. Oh, and I could tell them that by the way, I would be heading back to Florida in October for the next season of performances. Yeah, that would work.”

Lily shrugged and sprang nimbly to her feet. “Just
a thought. Got to run. Almost time for my entrance.” She gave him a platonic peck on the cheek as she left. “Think about it,” she whispered. “I think Hannah might be worth it.”

It was hard not to share Pleasant’s doubts about the idea of living with the other women. The matinee was still going on as they carried their few belongings from Levi’s car to the women’s sleeping car. Hannah led the way down the narrow and shadowy center aisle to the far end of the coach.

Along the way she could not help but take note of the berths they passed. Far more than a place to sleep, many of them seemed to be like a small house. There were makeshift shelves that held dog-eared novels, framed family photos and other memorabilia. There were curtains and coverlets of different fabrics and colors. There were canvas shoe bags, the pockets holding not shoes but personal items such as lotions and reading glasses and letters from home.

When they reached the far end of the car, Hannah pointed to two top berths across the aisle from one another. “These two,” she said. “You choose.”

Pleasant looked at the bunk hung just inches from the ceiling of the car and then back at Hannah. “But…”

“We’re the new girls,” Hannah explained, using the lingo Lily had used to explain things to her. “If someone leaves then we get to move down to the second tier of bunks.”

“And that’s so likely to happen over the next ten days,” Pleasant grumbled as she ripped a threadbare blanket off one bunk and held it up with two fingers. “Where can I dispose of this?”

“I’ll take care of it,” Hannah said, laying it on top of her bunk before turning back to Pleasant. “Here, let me help you get settled.”

But Pleasant had already climbed up the wooden ladder and started making up her bunk. Within minutes, she had transformed the space from dreary to cheery with the use of a quilt she’d made and her very pristine organization of her clothing on the shallow shelf at the foot of the bunk. Hannah watched as wordlessly her sister-in-law leaned back on the ladder to inspect her work, and then catapulted herself into the space. She lay flat on her back, her arms folded over her stomach, her legs straight.

And then Hannah noticed that the bunk had begun to shake and realized that Pleasant was laughing, tears running down her cheeks.

“What is it?” Hannah asked, fearing Pleasant might be having an attack of hysteria.

“It’s…it’s like…I can’t…” The more she tried to speak, the harder she laughed until Hannah could no longer contain her own laughter. “You try it,” Pleasant managed to get out before setting off on a fresh round of giggles.

Hannah quickly spread out her own quilt and climbed in. Just trying to maneuver so she could lie down she bumped her head twice and her knees and elbows several times. Finally, she plopped onto her back. “It’s a little cramped,” she said, which set the two of them off again laughing so hard that they were unaware that the matinee had ended and the women were slowly coming back to the sleeping car.

Moments later, they looked down to see several of the female performers gathered below them watching
them. Both struck their heads as they tried to sit up, setting off a chorus of sympathetic murmurs from the women below.

“It gets easier,” one said. “Took me a week but…”

“The trick is to…” another offered and was interrupted by two others with different advice.

Outside they heard the clang of the dinner bell. “Supper time,” one woman bellowed as she turned and hurried back down the aisle. And like a herd of sheep the others followed.

“You coming?”

Pleasant glanced over and Hannah was relieved to see that she was still smiling. The two of them wrestled with the acrobatics of getting out of the bunks they had thought were so difficult to get into, and followed their dozens of roommates out into the late afternoon sun and on to the dining tent.

Time was so short between the matinee and evening performances that most of the company ate with their costumes and makeup on. So when Levi stopped by, telling himself that he just wanted to be sure things were running smoothly, he had some trouble locating Hannah among the throng of performers.

Then he saw the white prayer cap. She was sitting at a table with Pleasant, Lily and Fred and three other performers. He positioned himself next to one of the large tent poles, glad to have this opportunity to watch her without her being aware he was anywhere nearby.

He knew Fred well enough to know that the clown was in rare form, keeping Lily and Hannah so consumed with giggles at his antics and tricks that they had barely touched their food. Even Pleasant was smiling.
He couldn’t help but wonder if Hannah and her sister-in-law had insisted on saying grace before taking their supper, or had been intimidated by the throng of performers and stagehands and decided against it.

And then to his amazement, she said something to the others. Lily looked over at Fred, who had a fork filled with mashed potatoes halfway to his lips and he stared back at her for an instant and then slowly lowered the fork to his plate and took Lily’s hand. One by one the occupants of the table completed the circle of linked hands and bowed their heads. Like a wave, silence settled over the tent as those at nearby tables observed the action and grew still. And while no one else repeated the practice, everyone waited respectfully for Hannah and Pleasant to complete their prayer and raise their heads.

If he hadn’t seen it with his own eyes, Levi would have thought it impossible for two Amish women to quiet a tent filled with rowdy circus people. Not that there weren’t some among the company who were religious. Long ago, he’d hired a retired minister to travel with the company and offer Sunday services. But those services were poorly attended, his employees preferring to take their day off and use it for much-needed sleep or to catch up on chores such as laundry or letter writing.