Half Moon Bay (30 page)

Ellie knew she should ring Nick, but she wasn’t strong enough just yet. She whistled to Shadow.

‘Come on, let’s go get some sand between our toes. At least now I know why you greeted him like a long-lost friend.’

She turned right, her feet taking her to the headland. She followed the track and skirted around stunted banksia trees clinging precariously to the rocks. A patch of native daisies poked their heads through the kangaroo grass and she stopped long enough to pick a small bunch.

At the top a giant rock formed a natural seat. ‘Neptune’s throne’, Nina used to call it. The wind teased Ellie’s hair free from its twist. Dried tears left her skin feeling tight. The water below, dark with the night, harried the rocks, white foam boiling in, then retreating.

One by one she tossed the daisies over the cliff, the wind catching them, spiralling down as they fell. Two years ago they’d scattered Nina’s ashes into the surging surf below this same spot. Several hundred people had made the journey to pay their respects, lining the headland as dawn broke. The local boardriders had bobbed in a circle out in the calm waters behind the break, bright-red petals strewn on the silvery ocean. Ellie always felt closer to Nina here, but tonight her thoughts were in disarray.

To accept that Nina had crossed the line to pursue her story almost felt like a betrayal by a sister who had always been a mentor and a guide. She didn’t want to believe that her sister was the cause of another man’s death and the end of another honourable man’s career. Nina had put the pursuit of headlines above her own safety and that of those around her.

Was the money in Nina’s account capital or profits? They may never be able to prove that one way or another, but she was certain that the story on Nina’s computer was compelling evidence that she would have handed everything to the authorities. She might be deluding herself, but the other option was too unpalatable. Lachlan Meriden? She’d make sure she assembled enough watertight evidence to bring him down. She owed Alex that much, even if he too had lied to her. When it came down to the wire, he’d saved her life. She couldn’t, wouldn’t, forget that.

But Nina? Ellie contemplated the contradictions that had been her sister’s life. Nina was alluring with her straight blond hair and immaculate clothes. To most men she was out of reach. But every now and then, someone touched her soul and she fell instantly and irreversibly in love. Ellie used to tease her about those conquests. Before long, the relationship would pale beside the pull of another conflict across the ocean and Nina would be off again, to report the news as she saw it.

Ellie doubted that Geoff Trader would have been any different. If she’d met Nicholas Lawson under different circumstances and the attraction had flared so brightly, would she have been capable of saying no? Probably not.

She hugged her knees to her chest, looking out across the now deserted break. The sun’s last touches were winging brilliant pinks and oranges across the sky. She wished she’d brought her camera with her.

‘Ellie.’ Nick’s voice came from behind her and she swung around, disconcerted by his sudden appearance, as though she’d conjured him up with her imagination. The breeze flattened his T-shirt across his chest and stomach. His hands were jammed into worn jeans. He looked like he’d been through hell.

‘Where did you spring from?’ She tried to hide the quick dart of joy that shot through her. He’d come after her!

‘Tom rang me a couple of hours ago and I was already halfway here. He told me where you’d be.’

Ellie was silent, not quite able to meet his eyes, hugging her knees tighter, feeling nerves jump in her stomach.

‘You’ve seen the report?’

She nodded, not trusting herself to speak.

He crouched down near her. ‘Ellie, I never meant to lie to you. It just wasn’t possible to be completely honest at the start, and then . . .’ He ruffled his already tousled hair. ‘Then I figured you wouldn’t believe I hadn’t set out to deceive you.’

She kept her face neutral, willing him to continue, wanting so badly to believe his words this time.

‘When I saw you that first morning at the house, I was shocked. I was looking for Tom. Your dad was great throughout the inquiry. I guess he never told you about that before. About how he kept me sane, then opened his home and his heart to me. Me, the man who’d failed to keep his daughter safe. I wanted to give him a heads-up on what was going down in his community, in Half Moon Bay. I knew he couldn’t be involved.’ His sigh ripped through Ellie, but she didn’t speak.

‘Last I heard, Ellie, you were on the other side of the world. You, and your steely composure, had haunted me for two years and suddenly there you were in front of me again. In Afghanistan all I wanted to do was cradle you in my arms and keep you safe.’ His voice had a bitter edge as he continued. ‘Instead, I had to entrust you to Dave Miller, while I cleaned up Nina’s mess.’ He shook his head, a slight tremor the only betrayal of the depth of his emotions.

‘We were all a little in awe of Nina. She had so much energy, so much conviction that what she was doing was right, showing the good things we’d brought to that scarred country. It never occurred to me, to any of us, until it was too late that she had another agenda. That she was already involved with Beyond Borders Strikeforce and setting up her own sting. I knew some of the ex-military guys who’d gone to work for them. So did Geoff Trader. We were gathering information on their operation to hand over to the authorities. Then Nina showed up. I tried to quarantine her, but she had a way about her, the ability to make a man feel like he was the only one in the world. Geoff fell hard. He should never have taken her out of the compound, but I should also have stopped it.

‘I had my own agenda, I admit. I figured we’d benefit from any additional information she gleaned. When she tapped into our contacts and set up a deal to purchase I should have pulled the pin then. Instead, I let it run. Geoff was supposed to keep me informed, but for whatever reason he chose not to that night.

‘When I got word from our interpreter that she and Geoff had been picked up by Taliban insurgents we went after them. I risked more of my men to try and extricate them. I should never have done that either, but I knew we had to strike fast or we’d lose them.’

‘What went wrong?’ Ellie dreaded hearing the story even though she knew she must.

Nick sighed and sat on the rock beside her, hunching forward. They were not quite touching, but close enough for her to feel the warmth from his body. His profile was edged against the night sky, his expression sad. She wanted to reach across and hold his hand, sustain him through the telling, but she remained mute, still.

‘I’ve relived that night a thousand times. They were picked up by one of the well-organised insurgent groups. Maybe the Taliban had been tipped off by BBS. Maybe they got lucky, but they must have thought they’d won the lottery. I got wind of it about half an hour after it happened. We tracked them to a deserted school compound, but the insurgents wouldn’t negotiate with us.’

Ellie held her breath, not wanting to hear Nick had hurt her sister.

‘The group panicked when the Apache attack helicopters arrived. They realised they were surrounded and tried to fight their way out. Nina and Geoff made a break for it and got shot as they ran towards us. Some nights it plays on rewind in my nightmares.’

Ellie reached across and placed her hand in his, feeling the tremors that were rocking the hardened soldier.

‘I didn’t want to see Geoff’s family hurt by something that is a product of war, of its uncertainty. I didn’t want to see your life and career ripped apart because of your sister’s actions. I was ready to quit after that tour of duty anyway. My father’s health was failing and the family engineering business needed me. But I couldn’t quite get out of my head the belief that I should have foreseen Nina’s actions, should have managed it better.’ He sighed again.

‘Up until Afghanistan, my life had been the military. Running the family business provided financial security, but I needed something more fulfilling, a role that allowed me to give something back. When I was approached by ICAC to assist with this part of the operation here at Half Moon Bay, it was an easy choice. I would finally have closure on the whole sorry mess. The O’Sullivan investigation was already well underway when I came on board. All our evidence was put to good use. Lachlan Meriden was identified early on as a person of interest at the Australian end. Meriden’s currently assisting the Feds with their inquiries. He’s trying to blame Nina, but my money is that it’s the other way around.’

‘The evidence on her laptop should help with that,’ Ellie said, feeling the weight lift from her shoulders. Nina had the proof, the authorities only needed to follow through and wrap it up. Lachlan Meriden would be held accountable for the deaths of Alex and Teisha, even if he couldn’t be blamed for Nina’s shooting.

‘It was so hard not to confide in you, but I had to be sure you weren’t involved. My heart told me you weren’t, but my head wasn’t going to be convinced that easily. The whole disaster seemed to keep on rolling, gathering more casualties as it went.’

Ellie squeezed his hand, finally finding words. ‘I believe you, Nick.’ Her voice trembled. ‘Dad laid it all out for me.’

He half smiled in the near darkness. ‘I broke every one of my rules by seducing you. To finally have you in my arms was a dream.’ He fell silent, but Ellie could feel the emotion in the big frame. She offered comfort.

‘No more lies, if we’re to find a way forward.’

‘“We”, Ellie?’ His dark eyes met hers in surprised hope. ‘Knowing that I was there and should have done more to stop them, you can still say “we”?’

‘Nick, Nina was no saint, and I know how passionate she was about her causes. The end always justified the means for her. You’re not responsible for that any more than I am.’

‘So there is a chance for us still?’

‘Is that what you want, Nick?’

‘Yes, oh God . . . I want to know what makes you laugh. I’ve already seen what makes you cry.’

‘That may take a while.’

‘I’m not in a hurry.’ He wrapped his arms around her, hauling her into his lap. His body was trembling. She rested against his chest in the safe circle of his arms and he pressed his lips against her temple. She ran her fingernail along his jaw, rasping over the new beard. She wanted this man with his hard hands and soft heart in a way she’d never wanted anyone before. She stretched up and touched her lips to the point of his jaw before it curved, tasted salt on his skin and smelt the hint of sandalwood she’d come to know.

He turned his head and captured her lips in a kiss. Its intensity was different to anything that had gone before, burning clear to her core. She felt his breathing go ragged, as one lean hand tangled in her hair, then cradled her head even closer. She heard his commitment in the whisper of her name, felt the desire in the shift of his body. Her hand rested on his chest, feeling the solid muscle vibrate and his heart thudding. The kiss swamped her, washed away any last reserves, and buried her in an avalanche of need. She finally understood what it felt like to be run down by love.

Nick broke the kiss first, tucking her hard up against him. His eyes held hers as his fingers brushed down her shoulder. ‘When you left without a word, I thought I’d lost you. The surveillance team outside my house said you looked frantic getting in the cab.’ He pressed his lips to her cheek. ‘I realised I’d do anything to get you back. I need you, Ellie Wilding; I need you desperately.’

She touched her fingers to his lips. ‘I had to come home. Half Moon Bay is the only place I’ve ever felt safe, even now, after everything that’s happened, but I didn’t think you’d follow me.’

He pressed a kiss to her fingertips. ‘What is between us is only going to grow stronger, Ellie.’

‘I know,’ she replied. ‘We’re bound by the truth now.’

‘The truth.’ His lips as they touched hers held the promise of a lifetime. She turned, sliding her arms around him, loving the play of muscles across his back as her fingers traced down his spine. His uneven breathing sent a surge through her limbs, pooling heat low in her belly. Her heart soared as she realised she was no longer held prisoner by her search for answers. The truth had set her free to live again, free to test this connection, this fierce desire that flared and raged between them.

The truth was a bridge that linked them. As she met his kisses with her own tempestuous passion she knew love was hammering on the shutters of her heart and she was finally prepared to fling them open and face the challenges with Nicholas Lawson beside her.

The sky arched royal blue over Half Moon Bay, the shadows lengthening, painting the white sand with dark silhouettes. The ocean murmured rather than roared this evening. A light easterly breeze stirred Ellie’s skirt as she opened the French doors wide and the cooler air rushed in, lifting the curtains in a rush. Lightning flashed to the west. Storms were forecast and would be welcome after the stifling summer heat of the day.

She was still drained from the drive up from Sydney. Nick had seemed more pensive the closer they came to the Bay.

‘Perfect,’ Nick said now, coming to stand behind her.

Ellie managed a smile. ‘It is.’

His reply was to slip his hands around her waist and nuzzle the sensitive skin below her ear. For a moment she rested against his strength.

‘Let’s sit,’ she said. ‘It’s lovely to have the place to ourselves for a change.’

She drew him across the verandah and sat on top of the wide steps. They’d done this so many times over the last eight months as the whole sorry investigation ground on. Tom and Shadow were still in Sydney, but as the latest court findings were handed down Ellie had a desperate need to escape from the city and come home. Lachlan Meriden would be in jail for a long time and the Australian smuggling operation had been cracked wide open. Alex’s killer already knew he wasn’t going home to Hong Kong for twenty years. Early on in the investigation O’Sullivan and his mates had entered plea bargains and would be out long before Ellie thought they should be. Nina’s reputation had been restored, but the fallout from her story had sent aftershocks echoing around the world.

Nick eased down behind Ellie, a long leg either side of her, his knees like two bookends against her thighs. The wind blew her hair back across his shoulder and he curled a handful around his fist and kissed the back of her neck. She shivered with the delight of it. He’d been her safe harbour, her place of refuge, as the case against Lachlan Meriden ebbed and flowed, as she unravelled Nina’s duplicity. She’d learned of Nick’s fiercely protective love for his mother and sister, watched him let down his guard with Sarah and Mikey, heard him laugh with Ron and Mavis as they pored over the plans for the new community centre on Mrs Bell’s land, and she’d seen him talking about war with her father. The only person missing was Nina.

‘She’ll always be here, Ellie.’ Nick was far too good at reading her thoughts.

‘I know.’

‘I think she’d approve of us, of me,’ he said. It was almost a question.

Ellie smiled at that. ‘Would you care if she didn’t?’

‘Of course, she’s your sister. She was so proud of you. We’d all heard so many stories about her little sister Ellie, I felt I knew you already even before finding you in that lousy hospital in Kandahar.’

‘Really?’

‘She carried photos of you and Tom with her. They were whipped out anytime she was asked about home. I remember the first time she worked with us when we were stationed in Kandahar. She was lounging in a deck chair on our precious square of lawn in the camp telling us her little Ellie would kick our arses to Hawaii and back in a surfing contest. There were plenty of guys lining up for the challenge.’

‘I didn’t know that.’ Ahead of them, on the edge of the horizon, the full moon cast an optimistic glow as it began its journey. Ellie glanced sideways at the space on the step beside them. She didn’t need a photograph to see Nina sitting there again, one leg tucked underneath her, a glass of wine in her hand as she expounded her latest theory. ‘Humility’s overrated,’ Nina used to say with an airy wave. ‘It’s your duty to follow your dreams. Just don’t ever lose sight of your home and what’s real in the world.’ She was larger than life, even in death.

The roofing iron groaned as it cooled. Ellie smiled again. The house made a habit of having an opinion. But home was so much more than this little beach shack now. It was the sum total of people, of places, of memories. Half Moon Bay was her first home and, like every first love, it would always be special.

The images of home would continue to be coloured by Nina, but now there were new photos to add to that collage, photos that were bold and vibrant and alive: Nick focusing on a game of chess with his sister, a fall of thick hair touching a lowered eyebrow as he narrowly escaped checkmate. Nick with his head inside the bilges of the trawler, discussing with Dan the latest in automatic pumps. A concerned Nick in conversation with Jason O’Sullivan as he drove him to a rehab clinic. A bloodied and battered Nick at the end of a brutal game of footy with his arms around his mates, all equally dirty and unbowed. And the memory of Nick’s slow smile as he woke in the early dawn and ran possessive hands down her body.

The shot of reckless desire took Ellie by surprise. She turned to him, pressed a kiss to his cheek and slipped her hand between the buttons of his shirt, loving the feel, the heat of his skin and the way it contracted with her touch. Ellie felt the thrill of him deep in her soul.

‘Come for a walk?’ She held out her hand and he linked their fingers together and followed her down the path to the beach below. The day was almost done. Night had won.

The tide left gleaming white lines as the waves rushed in, then retreated. The moon’s silver path beckoned, keeping pace as they ambled, their footprints washed away by the incoming tide. Above them the Milky Way scattered a smoky trail across the inky black.

‘Moonlight suits you,’ Nick said, bringing them to a stop and dropping a kiss on her shoulder. He linked his other hand with hers and drew her close enough for her skirt to tangle with his legs.

‘Like a soft focus lens?’ She looked up at him, her eyes accustomed to the night. ‘Or maybe it’s the witching hour.’ She stepped closer, pressing against him, feeling the steady rhythm of his heart, his warmth through the thin fabric of her dress.

He smiled at her, a lopsided grin that disarmed her. ‘Then I’m under your spell.’

‘This is too real to be a spell, Nick.’

‘I know.’

His lips skimmed hers before he drew away, far enough to look into her face. ‘You once told me this was the only place you felt safe, at home.’

The question was there in his voice and her heart soared. She searched for the words, the right words.

‘Here.’ She spread her hand across his chest. ‘Here is where my home is, with you.’

His breath was a shuddering sigh as his hands, urgent and hard, pulled her against him. He captured her mouth with a slick slide of his tongue and a nip of her lower lip. She answered that call, hearing the hiss of the surf, breathing in the sandalwood and myrtle on his skin, her body unravelling under his touch.

He slipped the fine strap from one shoulder but she broke the kiss and leant away, teasing him, needing to hear his voice.

‘And what about you, Nicholas Lawson? Is your home in Sydney?’

This time his smile was unreserved.

‘With you, Ellie Wilding, anywhere in the world.’

There
, she thought as she slipped the other strap clear and slid the dress from her body, letting it float to the ground. The truth was there in the heat of his hands, the hunger of his mouth and the pounding of her heart. Somewhere between the sorrow and dislocation of a war-torn country and the peace of Half Moon Bay they’d found their safe haven, their home. Together.

‘Anywhere in the world and for always,’ she whispered against his lips. ‘Always.’