Authors: Patricia-Marie Budd
Cooper Johnston
HNN—Danny Duggin Reporting
Good evening, ladies and gentleman. Tonight’s
Salve!
is going to be amazing. As you have come to expect, every so often, we bring on a special guest to interview. Tonight’s special guest is none other than Cooper Johnston. Many of you already know that Cooper was recently elected as the leader of the Conservative Right Party. And I know with someone like Cooper at the helm, this ship called Hadrian is ready to sail into any mighty cyclone the Stileses and the Stuttgarts might have to throw at us.
With that said, it is important to remind our viewers that not all Stuttgarts have tainted blood. Gordon Stuttgart, head of Hadrian National Exports, has given Cooper Johnston his endorsement. And if anyone knows what it is like dealing with the outside world, it is Gordon Stuttgart. He is constantly in communication with the outside world, negotiating terms for the services we provide them. Thanks to Gordon Stuttgart, 14 percent of Hadrian’s Gross National Income results from the exporting of fresh water from our numerous rivers and streams along with much of the grain and soya bean we raise. It is thanks to men like Gordon Stuttgart, who work tirelessly for our nation, that we can boast of having one of the strongest economic systems around the globe. Enough said on that front. It is time now to introduce you to tonight’s guest: the Conservative Right’s new leader, Mr. Cooper Johnston.
“Thank you, Danny.”
“Welcome, welcome, Mr. Johnston. It is such an honor to have you on
Salve!”
“It is an honor to be here. I appreciate having the great Danny Duggin, Hadrian’s most beautiful lover, introducing me to our citizens who might not have heard of me yet.”
“Oh, Cooper, you make me blush.”
“Danny, you were amazing as Antinous. No one could have captured that role but you.”
“Well, thank you. Playing Hadrian’s one true love was indeed the role of a lifetime. But let’s get back to the topic of you. You are so important, and everyone in Hadrian needs to know all about you, the man who will be our next president.”
“Thank you for your vote of confidence, Danny, but we must allow for due process and the results of the election to make the final determination.”
“Yes, of course. But I know you’ll win. You have to win. The very security of our nation depends on you.”
“You are right about that, Danny. Sadly, though, our founding mother, Destiny Stuttgart, in her declining years, is now being ruled by senility, and she has somehow managed to persuade a once-logical politician—did you know I voted for Elena Stiles?”
“Oh, me, too!”
“Well, somehow Mother Stuttgart has managed to indoctrinate even the likes of Elena Stiles into believing that Hadrian was established as a convalescent home for strais and bis. It saddens me to see such misguidance in both the Stiles and Stuttgart families.”
“Oh, but not all Stuttgarts. That we both know.”
“Yes, Gordon Stuttgart. Thank Hadrian for him. Now there is a man with Hadrian’s best interests at heart.”
“Undeniably! And you must be so proud to have a man like Gordon Stuttgart backing your political campaign.”
“Yes, indeed. When Gordon Stuttgart approached me about running for the leadership of the Conservative Right Party, I thought I was dreaming, but with his financial support and encouragement, I have succeeded.”
“Yes, and a lot of that is due to your vigilant stand on keeping Hadrian focused on the four cornerstones, the most important of which being that of a homosexual community working towards the diminishing of world population.”
“Absolutely! You hit the nail right on the head there, Mr. Duggin. We in the Conservative Right know how critical it is for Hadrian to maintain a stable population and accept that the only viable, peaceful, and loving means to reduce excessive human population is through a homosexual lifestyle and in vitro fertilization. What Elena Stiles and Destiny Stuttgart are calling for is absolute anarchy. To allow for heterosexuals to copulate at will
is utter insanity. Why, if we open the flood gates to allowing for heterosexual behaviours, then we are opening the gates to pedophilia and bestiality. These are not Hadrian’s ways. We are a loving, caring country, and our hopes for the future are the hopes for mankind.”
“Oh, Cooper, you are so right. So, what are your biggest fears if President Stiles is to be reelected this fall?”
“I think you know the answer to that. They are the same fears every patriotic citizen has: a return to the barbaric ways of heterosexuals and an opening of our gates to the world outside. And we all know what happened when we were open to receiving outsiders within our borders.”
“Oh, Cooper, you are so right. Viewers, what you are seeing right now is a simulation of the nuclear attack against our fair country. That fateful day of 6-13 when Jeremiah F. Butler set off a dirty nuke at the border gate in Augustus City. So many lives were lost that day. So many others suffered the horrible after-effects of nuclear radiation.”
“There is one thing I can guarantee the citizens of Hadrian if I am elected president—that never again will an outsider get close enough to our border to cause such horrific damage.”
“Oh, Cooper, you are so right! And as if that weren’t enough, there was that horrible breach of the Midwest Gate almost thirty years ago. Oh, viewers, it is almost too much, but as you can see by the grainy film, this attack was one of the most brutal. Our men were slaughtered and the women brutally tortured and raped. It’s just sickening. Oh, please, we need to turn it off. I can’t watch anymore.”
“I understand your trepidation in viewing such horrors, but if we don’t remind the citizens of Hadrian what those outsiders are capable of, what they have done to harm our very way of life, we may very well become complacent and allow the likes of Elena Stiles and Mother Stuttgart to convince others of the benign ways of the strai.”
“But we know that’s not true! Strais are anything but benevolent—especially the het’ro male! Such vile vicious creatures.”
“Yes, Danny. Yes, they are! And it is the responsibility of Hadrian’s government to ensure a strong military to better protect us from the very real danger they pose to our very existence. Outsiders are not only propagators and polluters; they are also extremely jealous of our natural environment, and they are determined to steal what precious bit of nature we have preserved inside Hadrian. Their ways are violent and vicious, and they will
do whatever they can to destroy us. We saw that thirty years ago with the breach of the Midwest Gate, and we suffered horribly that fateful day of 6-13. We cannot trust anyone who is heterosexual. By encouraging our citizens to accept heterosexual ways, we are encouraging them to emulate those murderous marauding fanatics.”
“Oh, Cooper Johnston, you have my vote.”
“Thank you, Danny. And, now, I must ask you to replay that footage I voc’d your producer. I know how difficult it is to watch, but it is critical that we never forget what those heterosexual barbarians did to us.”
“Hadrian, as hard as it is for us to watch and relive these horrific events, Cooper Johnston is right. We must never forget the crimes committed against our nation. Remember, when you voc your vote on October 28th, make sure your vote is for the betterment of Hadrian. Vote for the Conservative Right Party, and make Cooper Johnston our next president.”
Vale!
“All right!” Frank’s voice booms and echoes through the trees. “This isn’t basic training, but it might as well be. We will be learning tactics no other recruit has ever seen before. Just being outside the Wall is a new experience and one that is both daunting and frightening for us all! We are in enemy territory now. Keep your eyes and ears open at all times. Even though no enemy has been sighted directly outside our main gate in over a year, that doesn’t mean they are not out there.” Frank pauses for a moment to allow that potential threat to sink in. “Embrace your fear! Don’t pretend it isn’t there. I don’t want any fools under my command. Use your fear; let it light your awareness on fire.” Turning now to direct Mid, he says, “There will be sentry duty. Recruits will work in pairs and be on guard duty for three-hour intervals. I want you to pick the pairs.” Turning again to address the platoon, Frank bellows out, using all his authoritative powers, “Whatever camp we are at, and we are going to make many as we scout along our Wall’s fifty-mile defensive perimeter, there will be sentry duty. You and one other will serve three-hour shifts, ensuring our camp remains safe and no outsider intrusions occur.” Frank pauses for dramatic effect before continuing. He takes this moment to look into the eyes of every recruit. Many divert their attention; Frank makes note of these and those brave enough to hold his glare. “Now, we are going to teach ourselves what it means to be on the offensive so we can better anticipate enemy attack. Each of you was handpicked for your agility, intellectual skills, and effective use of weaponry. When we finish here, you will all go on to be instructors for the rest of Hadrian’s army.” Seeing a significant rise in swaggering conceit amongst the troops, Frank decides to remind them of their green status. “Assuming, that is, you
all
make it through training.” Frank smirks slightly when the faces of a few recruits blanch. “Where we stand now will be
our base camp as it is directly west of the main gate. This means we have two twenty-five mile stretches, one to the north, the other to the south, to scout out and determine the locations of our other camps. I want a camp established every five miles. Once all of our camps are established, we will determine our attack locations.”
“Locations, sir?” Lieutenant Westgate, known mostly as Mid, is intrigued. “I wasn’t aware that we would be attacking the Wall on more than one occasion.”
“General Birtbas—” Frank catches himself, but not in time for the troops to snicker. Instead of chastising them, Frank can’t help but smirk a little. “General Birtwistle has ordered us to attack the gate once, but he never specified how or when this attack is to occur. I have decided that it would be in our best interest to split our forces and attack the Wall multiple times and in multiple locations. Our initial attacks will be overt, the final one, and we will get to that later, will be covert. I intend for us to inflict as much havoc and confusion to Dev—Lieutenant Rankin’s team as possible. With Antinous on our side, maybe we can deliver a blow hard enough to slap the complacency out of our military—shock us into preparing ourselves for any kind of attack, especially those least anticipated. Now,” Frank lowers his voice to emphasize the gravity of their situation, “this little copse and the various camps we will be establishing are our new homes, and they will remain our homes until we can successfully fight our way back inside.” This time, all the recruits blanch, and fear battles with confusion for control of their expressions. “That’s right, boys and girls; you heard me. This is our home now. No one is letting us back in. We might as well be outsiders.” Of course, Frank is exaggerating their situation as Mid, who was warned in advance about this scare tactic, knows full well they will all be welcomed back inside the gate should an emergency occur. Frank is not adding that piece of intelligence for a reason. He wants his troops to reconcile with their new environment and learn to adapt to the discomforts that are only going to get worse. “So, you must reconcile to the fact that we will be out here for some time, the duration of which will depend on how fast you learn. We may be here for days, weeks, maybe even months.”
A communal groan ensues, and one youth steps out of the ranks to venture an opinion. “Why don’t we attack now? We’ve all been through basic training. We’re ready. Why make us live out here when we shouldn’t have to?”
Frank smiles. He anticipated this sort of response. “All right then,” he says in an encouraging manner, “attack.” He turns to look in the direction of the Wall and motions for the young man to begin his assault.
Stunned, the young man mutters, “Alone?”
When the youth makes no effort to move, Frank grabs him by the collar and half-drags, half-pulls the boy through the trees towards no man’s land, that two-mile stretch of wasteland where no life grows between the trees and the Wall. Behind them is a scuttling and muttering of troops wanting to see the outcome of this clash between ranks.
Once at the edge of the decimated tree line, Frank takes his gun and shoots twice in the air in rapid succession, followed by two shots with a two-second pause between each. As soon as the signal shots ring out, Frank turns, grabs the recruit, and shoves the boy forward. When Frank issues one curt command, “Run!” the boy races off in a mad dash towards the Wall. Frank begins to count down from five. When he reaches one, a shot rings out and the youth stumbles before falling.
One recruit screams, and another yells out, “Hadrian’s Lover, they killed him!”
Frank snorts. He turns to the screamer and directs him, “You, go fetch our wayward recruit.”
Mid turns to the troops to alleviate their fears. “He’s not dead, just stunned slightly. He was shot with a paint bullet. It broke open on impact, splashing red paint like a blood-letting wound. Although it hurt, it is nothing compared to the feel of a real bullet.”
When the screamer, Koman Samoei, finally reaches the downed recruit, he helps him to stand. When he offers an arm for the young man to hold, it is swatted away. Gripping his chest, the youth staggers back to the tree line.
Once the youth is back inside the tree line with the rest of the troops, Frank stops him. His eyes are immediately drawn to the red stain. Had it been a real bullet, it would have pierced the young man’s heart. Frank’s smile suggests pride. “Nice shooting, Devon!”
“Who’s Devon?” the injured youth inquires.
“Your shooter,” Frank answers. “What’s your name?”
“Private Recruit Atherton.”
“Your first name, recruit,” Frank clarifies.
“Brian.”
“Well, Brian, do you still want to attack the Wall right away?” Mid laughs, as do the other recruits.
“No, sir! We will attack when we are ready and no sooner.”
“When do you think we’ll be ready, sir?” Private Samoei asks.
“When I say we’re ready. In the meantime, we have a camp to establish.”
With that, Frank turns and marches back to the copse they will begin preparing for base camp.
*****