8
No Exit
“I’M not discussing anything with you until I get my
memories back,” I said through gritted teeth. “They weren’t
yours to take and there are things I need to remember.”
“I didn’t take away your memories, Beth,” Jake scoffed.
“Though it’s flattering you think I’m powerful enough to do
so. I may have buried them temporarily but dig deep and
you’l find them. Personal y, I’d let it go, make a fresh start.”
“Wil you show me how? I can’t do it by myself.”
“Give me one good reason why I should.” Jake rocked
back in his chair and pouted. “I’m sure you’l only twist
things to make me look bad.”
“I’m serious, enough with the games!”
“Bethany, has it occurred to you that maybe I’m doing this
for your own good? Maybe you’re better off this way.”
“Jake, please,” I said softly. “I’m not the same person
“Jake, please,” I said softly. “I’m not the same person
anymore. I don’t recognize myself. What’s the point of
having me here if I don’t even know who I am?”
Jake gave an exaggerated sigh as if my request were a
huge imposition.
“Oh, very wel .” In a single fluid movement he crossed the
room to where I was standing. “Let me see what I can do.”
Jake pressed two cool fingers lightly against my right
temple. And that was it. The repressed memories
cascaded like an avalanche. I had to reach out and steady
myself by holding on to the edge of the table. I stil
remembered my peaceful life at Byron, but now the missing
pieces of the puzzle were back. I remembered the core and
center from which everything else stemmed. I saw the night
of the Hal oween party, only this time I wasn’t alone.
Someone with dazzling blue eyes, honeystreaked hair, and
a smile so disarming it made me weak at the knees was by
my side. Remembering Xavier’s face caused an
indescribable rush of happiness to surge through me.
But it was short lived. Seconds later another memory
savagely blotted out the first. I saw Xavier’s crumpled figure
lying on the dusty road while a motorbike sped away into
the darkness. The memory made me so heartsick I wished I
could give it back and force it out of my mind. My whole
body now ached with the pain of our separation and the
sight of his lifeless form. I couldn’t live with the knowledge
that he might be gone. If I knew that Xavier was alive and
wel , I could even bear my exile to this God-forsaken
wasteland. Without him, I wouldn’t be able to muster the wil
to survive. I realized at that moment that, wise or foolhardy,
to survive. I realized at that moment that, wise or foolhardy,
al of my happiness came from one single source. If that
source was cut off, I wouldn’t be able to function; I wouldn’t
want to.
“Xavier,” I breathed. I felt as if al the air had been sucked
out of the room. Why was it so stifling in here? The image
couldn’t be dislodged. “Please tel me he’s al right.”
Jake rol ed his eyes. “Typical. I should have known your
thoughts would go straight to him.”
I was choking back tears. “Wasn’t it enough to abduct
me? How dare you hurt him! You’re a vicious, heartless
coward.” Rage suddenly replaced my distress. My hands
curled into fists and began beating at Jake’s chest. He
didn’t try to stop me but simply waited for the anger to
subside.
“Feel better now?” he asked. I didn’t feel better, but I did
feel a tiny sense of release. “Let’s dispense with the
melodrama,” he said. “Pretty boy isn’t dead—just a little
worse for wear.”
“What?” My head jerked up.
“The impact didn’t kil him,” Jake said. “It just knocked
him out.”
The relief I felt was resuscitating. I sent a silent prayer to
whatever higher power had spared him. Xavier was alive!
He was breathing and walking the earth, perhaps just a little
more bruised than when I last saw him.
“I suppose things are better this way,” Jake said with a
wry smile. “His death might have started things off on the
wrong foot between us.”
“Do you promise never to hurt him?” I asked testily.
“Do you promise never to hurt him?” I asked testily.
“
Never
is a long time. Let just say he’s safe for now.”
I didn’t like the implication behind the words
for now
, but
decided not to push my luck.
“And Ivy and Gabriel are safe?”
“They’re a formidable force together,” he said. “Anyway,
they were never part of the plan. I was only interested in
getting you here and now that’s done. Although for a while I
wasn’t sure I’d be able to pul it off. It’s no easy feat for a
demon to drag an angel into hel , you know. I’m not sure it’s
ever been done before.” Jake looked pleased with his
achievement.
“It sure looked easy to me.”
“Wel ,” Jake said, smiling indulgently. “I didn’t think I’d be
able to rise again after your holier-than-thou brother sent
me back down here. But then those sil y little friends of
yours started summoning spirits right there in Venus Cove!
I couldn’t believe my luck.”
Jake’s eyes smoldered like coals. “It wasn’t a very
powerful incantation that girl recited. It only awoke some
restless spirits, but they were more than happy to trade
places.”
“They weren’t trying to summon demons,” I said
defensively. “Seances are only supposed to conjure
spirits.” I couldn’t shake the feeling of responsibility. I had
chosen to turn a blind eye when I should have done more to
stop them, including smashing the board into tiny pieces
and throwing it out the window.
“It’s more of a lucky strike real y,” Jake said. “Who knows
what you’l pul out of the ground.” I glowered at him darkly.
“Don’t look at me like that, it’s not entirely my fault. I couldn’t
have brought you here if you hadn’t accepted my invitation.”
“What invitation?” I said sarcastical y. “I don’t remember
you asking if I wanted a pit stop in Hel .”
“I offered you a ride and you accepted,” Jake said
smugly.
“That doesn’t count, I was tricked—I thought you were
someone else!”
“Too bad. Rules are rules. Besides, how naive can you
be? Didn’t it strike you as a teeny bit odd that Mr.
Responsible would dive-bomb from a tree into a river? Did
you real y think he’d ditch you to play frat-boy pranks? Even
I didn’t think you’d fal for that. You of al people should have
known better, but it only took a second to break your faith in
him. You sealed your own fate by accepting that ride. It
hardly had anything to do with me at al .”
His words hit me like blows. As the realization of my own
stupidity sank in, Jake began to laugh. I’d never heard
anyone laugh in such an empty, hol ow way. He reached out
and grasped my hands in his.
“Don’t worry, Beth. I’m not going to let one little mistake
change my opinion of you.”
“Let me go home,” I pleaded. Somewhere in the
recesses of his mind I hoped there lingered a vestige of
decency that would al ow him to feel a hint of remorse, a
tinge of guilt, anything I could beg or bargain with. But I
couldn’t have been more wrong.
“You are home,” Jake said in a flat voice. He pressed my
hands to his chest. His flesh felt as mal eable as dough,
and for an awful second I thought my fingers would sink
right into the hol ow cavity where his heart should have
been.
“I’m sorry I can’t be human for you,” he drawled. “But you
have a few irregularities of your own, so I don’t think you
can sit in judgment.” He released one of my hands, al owing
his fingers to hover over my retracted wings.
“At least I have a heart, which is more than I can say for
you,” I said. “It’s no wonder you don’t feel anything.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. You make me feel things,
Beth. That’s why you have to stay. Hel ’s a whole lot brighter
with you in it.”
I wrenched my other hand free. “I don’t have to do
anything. I may be your prisoner, but you have no power
over my heart. And sooner or later, Jake, you’re going to
have to accept that.” I turned on my heel to leave.
“Where do you think you’re going?” Jake demanded.
“You can’t just wander around here unchaperoned. It’s not
safe.”
“We’l see about that.”
“I real y wish you’d reconsider.”
“Leave me alone!” I yel ed over my shoulder. “I don’t care
what you want.”
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” In the hal way I found Hanna
waiting dutiful y.
“I’m leaving this hel hole,” I announced and headed in the
direction of the revolving doors. The lobby looked
unattended so perhaps I wouldn’t be intercepted.
“Wait, miss!” Hanna cautioned, scuttling alongside me.
“The prince is right, you don’t want to go out there!”
I ignored her and flung myself through the revolving doors
and out into the middle of nowhere. Surprisingly no one
made any attempt to stop me. There was no plan in my
mind but that didn’t matter. I wanted to put as much
distance between Jake and myself as I possibly could. If
there were portals into this place, those same portals had
to lead out. I only needed to find one. But as I ran into the
smoky tunnels Hanna’s words reverberated in my head.
There is no way out
.
Beyond Hotel Ambrosia the tunnels were deep and dark,
littered with beer bottles and the burnt-out husks of old cars,
charred from the inside out. They twisted al around me and
the people that staggered past seemed caught in a daze,
completely unaware of my presence. I could tel they were
condemned souls by the hol ow looks in their eyes. If I could
find the road we’d taken to get to the hotel, maybe I could
persuade the door bitches to let me out.
The deeper I ventured into the tunnels, the more I began
to notice things, like the strange mist and the smel of
burning hair that was strong enough to make me cover my
mouth with my hand. The mist swirled around me,
marshaling me forward, and once it cleared I saw that I was
nowhere near Pride, the club through which I had first
entered. In fact, I had no idea where I was, but I sensed a
deep evil, like a chil in my blood. For one thing, strangers
surrounded me. I wasn’t sure what to cal them, but I knew
they had once been people. There was no way you could
cal them that now. They looked more like wraiths and they
walked around aimlessly, vanishing in and out of the dark
crevices. Their energy was stil present even though they
looked through vacant eyes and their hands clutched
uselessly at the air. I focused on the apparition closest to
me, trying to understand what was happening. It was a man
smartly dressed in a business suit. He had a neat haircut
and wore metal-framed glasses. After a few moments a
woman materialized in front of him along with the domestic
setting of a kitchen. The whole scene shimmered like a
mirage, but I had the feeling that for those involved it was
far more real. A heated discussion erupted between the
pair. I felt il at ease watching them as if I were intruding on
a very private moment.
“No more lies. I know everything,” the woman said.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” the man
replied in a tremulous voice.
“I know that I’m leaving you.”
“Don’t say that.”
“I’m going to stay with my sister for a while. Until things
get sorted.”
“Sorted?” The man was becoming more agitated.
“I want a divorce.” There was a resolve in her voice that
made the man crumble and he made a low, moaning
sound.
“
Shut up
.”
“I’ve had enough of you treating me like dirt. I’m going to
be happy without you.”
“You’re not going anywhere.” His body language was
threatening, but she didn’t read the signs.
“Get out of my way.”
When she tried to push past him, he seized a carving
knife from the set on the counter. Even though it wasn’t real,
the knife’s blade gleamed and looked solid. He lunged
forward and slammed his wife back against the counter. I
didn’t see the knife come up, but the next minute it was
lodged firmly under her rib cage. Instead of remorse, the
sight of blood unleashed a frenzy. He stabbed repeatedly,
ignoring her shrieks until the opening he had made was a