Guilty as Sin (30 page)

“Gods yes. Best offer I
‟
ve had— Well, in a while anyway.” He climbed back

through the window nimbly enough, swept her up under his arm and back to the bed.

141

Before she could protest, she found herself seated cozily on his lap, being expertly

kissed.

Her head swam. Gripping a warm bare shoulder, she hung on. Gods, he was good

at this. Dominant enough that she felt a little overwhelmed and very very feminine, but

so tender she knew she was being cherished.

Loved.

Oh no. No. He couldn
‟
t— He
‟
d said—

Godsdammit, just a few more seconds. Enough to make a memory. Then she
‟
d do

her duty.

Lise turned her body fully into his, breasts pressing delightfully against the

unyielding planes of his chest. Oh gods, he
‟
d wrapped his tail around hers, flexing to

the rhythm of the kiss. Silken tingles chased up and down her spine, settling into a

demanding throb at her tailbone. Reeling, she slid both hands into his hair, two fistfuls

of it to hold him to her, to let him know how much she loved it.

Slowly, Dax sank down until he was flat on his back, Lise sprawled over him like a

willing blanket. Deep in his throat, he made a noise of masculine satisfaction, a cross

between a purr and a growl. He was hot beneath her, big and hard and strong, his

erection prodding shamelessly into her belly.

She shuddered with pleasure, her bones melting. Perfect, just perfect.

If only— Gods, it was no use, she couldn
‟
t relax, couldn
‟
t surrender herself to

sensation. She wanted to cry, to protest, to argue, but she knew what was right. She

knew her duty. Hell, she
‟
d always known it. Wasn
‟
t it bred in blood and bone and

feather? No more procrastination, and by the Veil, no more errors of judgment.

Squirming, she braced both palms on his chest and pushed. Nothing happened for

an endless moment then Dax separated their mouths enough to murmur, “
Mmm.

What?”

Lise sighed. “Let me go, Dax,” she said firmly. “Now.”

Instead, he swept his tongue across her lower lip. “Do I have to?” he asked like a

little boy.

Lise turned her head away. Whether it was to hide the smile or her trembling lips

she couldn
‟
t have said. “Yes.”

Grumbling, Dax released her. The moment she was free, Lise rolled off the bed and

stood, scowling down at almost seven feet of hard Aetherii male. Completely

unselfconscious, Dax shoved a hand into his trews and adjusted his swollen cock,

grunting with relief as he did so.

“Dax!”

He flushed. “Uh, sorry.” But his lashes fluttered down to hide a twinkle.

“Godsdammit!” Lise snatched a pillow from the bed and thumped it into his pelvis.

“Rip the Veil, stop that this minute. I can
‟
t think straight.”

He brightened. “Really?”

142

Lise tucked her shirt back into her trews. “Do not move that pillow,” she said

through gritted teeth. Gods, what if his sister had made it for him, or worse, his mother?

Shit!

She had to administer the reprimand, if only to keep him safe in the future. Another

stunt like this one and he might not come back to lounge about on beds, looking huge

and tasty and everything she
‟
d ever wanted in a mate. All right, it was only words, a

sequence of sounds in the air. Get it over with hard and fast, like taking nasty medicine.

She stiffened her spine.

“Going off with Michael compromised every principle I taught you. How could you

be so stupid?”

Dax
‟
s big fingers fiddled with the fringe on the pillow, but he met her gaze without

flinching. “I know,” he said. “And I
‟
m sorry. I wouldn
‟
t worry you for the world.”

“That
‟
s not the point.”

“It is for me.”

“I know this is awkward.” She took a step forward. “But you have to listen to me.

You
‟
ll never have a career in security if you don
‟
t smarten up.” She had to clear her

throat before she could go on. Gods, she could feel the flush mantling her cheeks. “I

couldn
‟
t—I couldn
‟
t recommend that we keep you on.”

Dax regarded her thoughtfully, his beautiful eyes clear and calm.

Lise stared back, baffled. He had to be the strangest man she
‟
d ever met. Why

wasn
‟
t he embarrassed? Defensive?

“No problem, chick. I know what I want and it
‟
s not security. Remember?” His lips

curved in a smile spiced with mischief. “I told you that last time we kissed.”

Lise grabbed her thrashing tail in both hands to keep it still. “Well, yes, but—”

“I want to work with children, like Fledge.” He sat up, his face alight with purpose.

The pillow tumbled to the floor. “I
‟
m good at it, Lise. I like it. I enjoy making a

difference.”

“Oh,” she said weakly. “Well. Um, that
‟
s all right then.”

Stiffly, he rose, rotating one shoulder, experimenting with the bandaged wing. “It
‟
s

going to be another hell of a day. I need more
godspeace
. Also breakfast and a bath.” He

curled his tail around her waist. “Coming, sweetheart?”

“And that
‟
s another thing!”

“Uh-huh. What?”

His mildly enquiring gaze irked her beyond endurance. “I
‟
m not your sweetheart,

so don
‟
t play the innocent with me,” she snapped. “What you said, about…about

loving…” She gasped to a halt, the air in the room suddenly as thin as the empty sky

thousands of feet above the Mountains of Morn.

For the first time, Dax looked troubled. Running a hand through his hair, he blew

out a breath. “I hadn
‟
t meant to say anything just yet,” he said ruefully. “It was reaction,

the fever, exhaustion, Michael.” He waved a hand. “Everything.”

143

The bottom dropped out of Lise
‟
s stomach. “Then it
‟
s not true? You don
‟
t…uh, love

me?”

Dax skated a palm down her spine, across a wing. The same way he would have

soothed a fretful child, she thought with an inward snarl. Growling, she turned away,

but he snagged her elbow and drew her back.

“Lise, I
‟
ve been in love with you since I was seventeen.” Every word came out deep

and measured. “I
‟
m not going to change now.”

Lise
‟
s mouth moved but no sounds came out.

“I promise I
‟
m not crazy,” he said. “Though from your point of view— Ah, hell!”

He turned away to look out of the window.

Lise breathed hard through her nose. He had to be the most maddening—the

sweetest— “Dax, be sensible. You hardly know me. Not to mention the fact I
‟
m four

years older than you.”

With a snort, he swung around to face her. “Four years is nothing. It
‟
s been this

way since the first time I saw you.” Morning light streamed in through the window, so

his huge figure was backlit. It played over the metallic bronze of his plumage, striking

sparks the same fiery green as top-grade
emeraldas
.

“That was it for me,” he said with quiet dignity. “I knew.” He squared his

shoulders, his wings mantled behind him.

Lise struggled. She must have been mad, or blind. How could she have dismissed

this man as a great lump? How dare Mirry clap Daxariel the Burnished on the back and

call him “little cousin”?

Gods, all the natural talent to be a First Pinion warrior, but too damn nice,

too…decent to kill. Yet this was a fighter who
‟
d taken on two Hssrda and won, a man

as solid as a mountain. And he was her dear friend. With a sudden shock, she realized

she trusted Dax as she did no other. He wouldn
‟
t let her down. It wasn
‟
t in him to

abandon a friend or a loved one. Which brought her full circle…

She shook her head to clear it. “Seventeen?” she said. “
Seventeen?
”

“I know you don
‟
t remember.” His lips quirked in a wry smile. “But, Veil-it, I do.

You would have been just about to graduate from the Academy. A group of seniors did

a demonstration for us first years and afterward you and another girl stayed to answer

questions.”

Lise frowned, searching her memory. She had a vague recollection. “It was fine that

day I think, but the wind was a bitch,” she said slowly. “Really knocked us around.”

Dax ran the backs of his fingers down a pearly-gray flight feather. “The sky was

clear and you were magnificent, like a drawn sword flashing against the blue. My life

was never the same again.”

Fragments were coming back. “There was a tall boy, right at the back. That was

you, wasn
‟
t it?”

He nodded.

144

“But you didn
‟
t speak.”

“I couldn
‟
t,” he said simply. “Oh Lise.” Picking up her hand, he turned and pressed

warm lips to the inside of her wrist. The pulse kicked under the thin skin.

Rip the Veil, he was shaking. Lise blinked, her eyes prickling. “Hero worship,” she

husked. “And now friendship, that
‟
s all.”

Dax rallied. “Don
‟
t forget two scorching kisses.” He twinkled at her.

Godsdammit, she was blushing. “I told you that was a bad idea. We made a

mistake, Dax. Two mistakes.”

He ignored this as if she hadn
‟
t spoken. “Lise…” After a short hesitation, he took

her other hand, his green-gold gaze grave and very steady. “All my life, I
‟
ve had—I

don
‟
t know what to call them—hunches, feelings, divine revelations.” When she

opened her mouth, he lifted her hands to kiss her knuckles. “Don
‟
t say anything, not

yet. I know it sounds insane.”

He paused, obviously searching for words. “Have you ever caught a perfect

updraft? On a day when the air is fresh and clean and the mountain
‟
s shoulder is your

friend?” His voice dropped to a velvet growl. “It
‟
s like having the breath of the gods

beneath your wings, bearing you up and up, and you know you won
‟
t fall. They
‟
ll

never let you fall. Because it
‟
s right.”

His throat moved as he swallowed. “I haven
‟
t tried to explain it before. Hell, I

sound like a lunatic.” His grip tightened and his voice rose. “But I know when

something—or someone—is right for me. I
‟
ve learned to trust my instincts, my gut. I