Guardian (17 page)

I focused my whole being on that group of people in front of me, most of them strangers, all of them watching me with baited breath and similar expressions of absolute amazement. I could only assume it was the way the demonic little things were bouncing right off of me. I couldn’t help but be amazed as well. Whatever shield I had around me had no holes or weak points, and when I finally reached Rafael, Matthias, Rachel, Daniel, and the others, the beasts did not follow me.

“Oh, Naomi!” Rachel’s cry of relief pierced my heart and made any second thoughts I’d had since the sighting of demons completely disappear.

I had no sooner passed Naomi off to Rachel when Daniel’s urgent voice said, “There are more coming. We have to go. Now.”

There was a great stirring as they all unfurled their wings and jumped into the sky. I covered my face with my hands, guarding it from the wind and debris that had been kicked up by so many wings beating at once. When I lowered my arms once again, I was completely alone on the sidewalk.

“Really?” I asked, planting my hands on my hips. But before I could even be angry, or, more truthfully, disappointed, something knocked into me from behind. Instead of falling forward, as I would have imagined, I found myself being lifted up into the sky. I screamed once before I heard Rafael’s voice in my ear, “Sorry, we’re not used to passengers.”

We rose higher up into the air, much higher than any of the skyscrapers that were now below me. I saw the little ants of people walking through the city, saw the tiny cars zooming along the highway, I could even see the spires of the Cathedral we had just vacated. The wind rushing in my ears made talk impossible, and even if it had been, I suddenly discovered I was incredibly, unearthly
tired
.

Rafael had scooped me up with one arm under my knees and the other at my back, and there, pressed tightly against his firm body, breathing in his clean, wonderful scent, I realized all I wanted to do was sleep, forever if I could. The exhaustion I’d felt after Austin had attacked me was nothing compared to this. I felt as though I hadn’t slept for weeks, and I fought to keep my eyelids from staying closed every time I blinked.

Though it felt like much, much longer, it was only minutes before Rafael began descending into the city, and we arrived at our destination. It was an old abandoned brick factory, with a couple windows still boarded up, but the bottom level was open for parking. As Rafael’s feet hit the ground and he began walking inside at a quick clip, I recognized his car in the lot, a lone vehicle in the big space.

I expected Rafael to let me down when we approached the stairs, but he never faltered as he carried me up several flights to where Matthias and the others were all gathered. Only then did he gently set me back on my feet, keeping one arm around my shoulders to support me. Which was good, because I might have fallen flat on the floor, otherwise.

I was too exhausted to do anything but stand there, my eyes half closed. Rafael seemed to take pity on me and led me over to a large pile of pillows and blankets. I curled up in them almost mechanically, my last thoughts before I drifted off revolving around the fact that this time, Rafael was going to answer
all
of my questions when I felt rested enough to ask them.

When I opened my eyes, it was dark outside. Through all the openings of the warehouse windows I could see stars twinkling in the otherwise pitch-black sky. I slowly sat up, memories of what had happened coming back in the blink of an eye. I looked around, trying to catch my bearings. The floor we were on was large and open, without any walls blocking the way. It seemed to be a sort of flight deck, because nearly all the floor to ceiling windows had been knocked out. People stood at the edge of them, sometimes flying in and out, some not moving at all, others poised at the edge, wings half unfurled and still, gazing at the stars.

Since I wasn’t panicked or scared out of my wits at that moment, I finally took the chance to admire the wings everyone was in possession of. It was at least a twelve foot wingspan for most of them, and the shape of the wings put me to mind of a bird, long and thin, rather than tall and bulky. They had one bend midway through, and seeing how large the wings were, I couldn’t understand how in the world I had missed seeing them before on Rafael’s body. But he had always worn his jacket, always, and when the wings were folded up against his back, they seemed to simply disappear, with how they fit so smoothly against his body.

I had been admiring the wings (and wondering a little jealously how in the world they had gotten them) when Rafael appeared at my side. He looked down at me, his face completely expressionless. We stared at each other for a long, heavy moment, and he was the first to look away.

“We have some things to discuss, you and me,” I said calmly. “And pleading the Austin? It’s history.”

Rafael sighed heavily. “I don’t suppose you could be persuaded to just forget what happened and go on with your normal life? It’s much, much safer, Lyla.”

I pointed as someone swooped in through the open gaps in the warehouse. “Forget that? Are you crazy, Rafael? Not a chance!”

Rafael crouched down in front of me, bringing himself to my level, as I so often did with Colton or Grace. “Lyla,” he said softly, in a voice that I couldn’t have ignored, no matter how hard I tried. “There are bigger things at stake here than you could ever imagine. If you have any wish of self preservation, any wish to keep Colton and Grace completely safe, you will not insist on asking questions. You will go home and continue on with your life as it was before I came to you yesterday.”

That was a low blow, mentioning Colton and Grace’s safety. I was resentful at Rafael for bringing them into this. But how bad could it honestly be? I’d always kept Colton and Grace safe, and would continue to do so until they were old enough to do it themselves. And besides, for once in my whole seventeen years, I wanted to do something solely for myself. I wanted to do something that would satisfy me, without making a sacrifice for others. Was that such a horrible thing?

I shook my head vigorously. “No. I want to know what’s going on here. I want to know what I’ve gotten myself into.”

“You haven’t,” Rafael said in a hard voice, “gotten yourself into anything. If I do tell you the truth-”

“
When
you tell me the truth,” I interrupted, though his tone scared me into
almost
having second thoughts.

“If and when I tell you the truth of what’s going on, that doesn’t mean you’re part of this. There is nothing to be gained by bringing you into it and getting you killed. Or worse.”

What, I wondered, could actually be worse than death? “All right then,” I said in a purposely aggravating voice, “what are you, exactly, Rafael? What are all,” I waved a hand at the other half dozen people around us, “of you? Scientific experiments gone wrong? Aliens from another planet?”

Rafael made an irritated noise and looked around. “We aren’t going to talk right here,” he said in a low voice. “Come on, get up.” He grasped my arm and yanked me up onto my feet. I felt like a yoyo, he pulled me up so easily. It was only just beginning to dawn on me how strong Rafael really was. He leaned down and picked up one of the heavy fleece blankets I had been sleeping on and wrapped it around my shoulders.

“It might be cold up there,” he muttered in explanation. Then he turned and led me up one more flight of stairs, to the roof of the building. Up this high, the stars were bright and much more visible, and I took a moment to admire them as Rafael began pacing back and forth.

I chose a seat on a very clean but very old armchair someone had left on the roof. With all the flying people around, I didn’t wonder overlong about how it had gotten there. I tucked my legs up underneath me and wrapped the blanket tightly around me. I was ready for a story, I figured. I waited for Rafael to speak of his own accord. He already knew my question, and so long as I was getting an answer, I was content to wait for it.

“I wish it was as simple as being messed up science experiments or aliens,” Rafael finally said. The pain in his words made my own body ache for him. “It would be a lot easier to explain that way. And it wouldn’t be so dangerous to tell you.”

“How can telling me be dangerous?” I asked. “Those little, those
things
won’t come after me, will they?”

“Demons,” Rafael corrected. “They were, in fact, demons, Lyla.”

“All right, those demons, why would they come after all of you? Why would they take Naomi?”

“Because,” Rafael said, in a voice fraught with indecision, “because we are all angels, Lyla. They chase us, and vice versa, because Matthias, Rachel, Daniel, and I, are angels.”

I allowed these words to wash over me, soaking them in as Rafael stood looking at me, his chest rising and falling rapidly. When I was sure that yes, Rafael had claimed to be an angel and I wasn’t still dreaming, I shook my head, chuckling a little bit. “All right, Rafael, the truth this time. What are you?”

Rafael shook his own head, plowing a hand through his dark, wavy hair. “Why do you ask when you refuse to believe the truth?” he asked softly. “We are all angels, Lyla.”

“No,” I said, shaking my head. This was too much, really. I had waited so long, had wondered and lain awake at night, pondering over Rafael’s secrets, only to have this be my answer? Couldn’t he come up with something a little better? “You, you do bad things. You stole the Hummer from someone. You ordered water at Taco Bell and got Coke-A-Cola! You don’t even go to church!” My voice was shrill. “Is this supposed to be some kind of joke on me? Are you making fun of me?”

“Of course not,” Rafael said shortly.

“See?” I cried. “Angels wouldn’t snap at me either!”

Rafael sighed. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to snap at you. It’s just, I have never told anyone about this, and now, the one time I try, you aren’t listening to me.”

I took a deep breath to calm myself. “I’m listening,” I corrected him. “I don’t believe what I’m hearing. In my world, angels are holy beings who live in heaven, with God. They don’t sin. They worship God all the time, forever.”

Rafael looked at me with a sad, sad smile. It was heart wrenching, and just like the last time he had given me that look, I found my own eyes prickling with tears for him, it aroused such sadness in me.

“I never said we were that kind of angel,” he said, and his voice was sad too. I wanted to block my ears from the sound, it filled me with such despair. “We are fallen angels, Lyla.”

“Fallen angels?” I asked, though it hurt to form the words. I wasn’t sure how much more of this hopeless emotion I could stand.

“We are part of the thousands upon millions of angels who followed Lucifer and fought for him when he rebelled against God.” Rafael’s voice was achingly slow and halting.

My lips felt stiff, my whole body frozen as I asked, “You… rebelled? You fought
against
God? You’re, you’re
bad
!”

The sun was rising just then, bathing the world in the pinks, reds, and oranges of a new day. But when the light hit Rafael, it wasn’t miraculous or beautiful. I cowered back in my chair in fright as his eyes glinted red, as his skin glowed a violent shade of purple, and the shadows hooded and clung to him easily, like a second skin. In but a moment, Rafael had become an evil thing of the night, a figure worthy of a nightmare. Something that wasn’t safe and someone who could hurt me.

Then he took one step forward and the spell was broken, the light in all the wrong places, and he was Rafael once again. “Lyla,” he said, his voice pleading for me to listen.

But the demonic vision of Rafael was still in my head, and I couldn’t push it away. I jumped up out of the armchair, tossing aside the blanket. I couldn’t stand to be here anymore, couldn’t stand to be around him. Ignoring his protests, I ran down all six flights of stairs as one possessed, running flat out when I hit the ground level and not stopping until I reached home, all the way on the other side of town.

In retrospect, of course, I deeply regretted running from him. For the better part of two months, I had wondered what Rafael really was, tried to worm his secrets out of him, and wished he considered us close enough for him to confide in me. And then, just as Rafael had felt I could be dragged irreversibly into his secret world, I had panicked and run. I had gone home and hidden under my covers like a scared little child. But after tossing and turning for hours, I had awoken and agonized all day over what I had done, over whether or not Rafael could be trusted. It wasn’t until Colton and Grace were dropped off from their sleepover, and I hugged them, that I realized I was being absolutely ridiculous.

Rafael was no more a demon, no more evil than I was.
Less
than I was, in fact. His origins had been holy, he was still an
angel
. He may have followed an evil path once, but going over his behavior since we had met, I could find no flaw. He had saved my life, and that of Colton and Grace, several times. It was only the secrets he had kept from me that had made me question him, secrets he had been willing to finally tell me, only I had left. I had abandoned him, just as he had done to me. Instead of being the victim, the wronged, I had finally turned into the enemy.

After a second night of endless tossing and turning and absolutely no sleep, my mind was made up. All the curiosity I’d had before finding out the truth about Rafael had doubled, maybe even tripled, and I could barely contain it. It made my fingers tremble at times, my whole body shake and I had to close my eyes and take a deep breath to get myself under control.