GRIND (The Silver Nitrate Series Book 1) (35 page)

“Denise seems really nice.” Silver placed her napkin over her lap, then reached for her glass of water for a vigorous swallow.

“She is.” Zenith scratched at his nostril. The small diamond stud in his nose shimmered as he moved about in his seat. “She’s real nice. She’s expensive, too, but as you know, the lawsuit settlement takes care of it now.”

“That’s very good, and I’m glad that woman was fired, fined, and is serving a sentence, even though it’s rather short. She should have gotten more than six months.”

Paw simply sat there, looking off into space.

“Part of that money is being used for extended care. I would have hired her anyway. I would have made a way, you know?” He shrugged. “She’s great; she comes whenever I need her.”

Silver shot a momentary, stiff glance in the old man’s direction…

He’s doing it again… staring at my breasts. Paw is something else…

She picked up her spoon to taste her gumbo then paused when the old man’s voice rang out.

“No, no. We should give thanks first.” He waved his hand in Zenith’s direction, wishing to hold it. Zenith took his grandfather’s hand, and she took Zenith’s in turn.

“Mother Earth, thank you for this fine food to sustain us. Thank you for the fresh water that flows from the streams to help prepare it. Thank you for the plants, the herbs that fight disease; the food becomes medicine and nourishment all in one. Speaking of nourishment, Great Spirit, we thank you for our first sources of nourishment when we enter the world, which were breasts. Breasts of all sizes are nice, but the enormous ones that sit high and mighty like the young lady’s here at this table are a
big
blessing indeed!”

“Paw!” Zenith’s slammed his fist on the table, making everything vibrate and the water glasses threaten to topple and spill. “I know you know better than this! I’m sick of this shit.”

“Zenith, calm down.”

“No, he keeps doing it and he knows it’s not right.” Zenith threw his napkin off his lap, onto the table. “You’re doing this on purpose, using your disease as an excuse!”

“Disease?” The old man looked around in confusion. “What disease?” he asked with a crooked, sly grin.

“Don’t play with me, Paw. You know exactly what I’m talking about. You have dementia. You are using it as an excuse to say inappropriate things. Don’t talk like that around my girlfriend, alright? I mean it. That’s rude.”

“But when you had her over here the other night in your bedroom again, you were sayin’ all sorts of things to her, like how good she was at giving top. What’s top? Like making shirts? Do you sew blouses, Silver?”

She died a thousand deaths.

“You think you’re real funny, don’t you?!”

“But I’m jus’ saying that—”

“It’s
my
house and she’s mine and I can say whatever I want in it!”

“Zenith, it’s fine.” She grabbed his wrist and squeezed, suddenly feeling uncomfortable as hell. She’d never heard him yelling so loudly, so revved up. “Can I speak to you for a second, please? Alone?” Frowning, she offered a look of warning should he attempt to deny her request. She stood and started walking away.

Get your ass up and talk to me!

Her sweetheart stiffened, probably getting ready to protest, but he took another glance at her and thought better of it. Snatching himself up from his seat, he stormed into the living room, trailing behind her.

“Zenith, what the hell is wrong with you?!” she hissed. “Why would you talk to him like that?”

“What are you talking about? Are you serious?” He pointed behind him in the direction of the dining room. “Did you
not
hear what he was saying about you?”

“You’ve been dismissive and snappy to that man since we walked in the door. You know he’s sick! Of course I heard what he was saying, but he’s not in his right mind. You sat down, ignored him, and now this. What’s going on?” She seized his arm, made him come closer, look her in the eye.

“What? Me? Oh, I’m the problem now?”

“Yes, you’re the problem, Zenith. You completely overreacted.”

“He’s the one that’s been staring you down and saying that ridiculous ass prayer! I’m trying to defend you.” His outbursts lost steam, yet he held on to his slippery position.

“I don’t need to be defended; I can defend myself. What I
do
need is for you to tell me why you’re being like this. This is not like you, and I know you… I know my baby. Something is wrong. Something has been wrong since yesterday, actually. Now what happened? What’s going on?”

He shoved his hands in his pockets and stared at the ground.

“Part of the settlement required that Paw get another medical evaluation, a complete physical. He’d just had one a few months ago, you know, CT Scans, MRI, bloodwork.” She nodded. “He gets them anyway, but they did it one more time. Well, I just got the results back. This time… this time things were worse. He went back to his regular doctor and uh…” He closed his eyes and pinched the top of the bridge of his nose, wincing. “They called me back in the office. He’s not doing well at all, Silver. His brain scans show progression of the disease. He’s forgetting more and more… It’s Alzheimer’s.

“He has low iron, his thyroid is messed up… He’s fallen and hurt himself. He’s becoming violent even with me now, on occasion, and he never did that before. I notice that if I raise my voice, it seems to make him stop, calm down. I think I’m just so worried that when he does this stuff, he is acting so different and it… it upsets me…and…I’m just scared because he’s all I got left of my family… the family that loves me…and I don’t know who this man is that is living with me and sometimes…he doesn’t know who I am, either.” His voice shuddered as the last words tumbled from his lips.

She grabbed the man and held him close, holding him tight to her, caressing his ponytail. He returned the embrace, visibly fighting tears. Zenith wanted to fall the hell apart, but he refused. Their embrace would simply have to be enough. They rocked back and forth, performing an odd, yet soothing, death dance of sorts. How strange grief was… how strange indeed.

Paw was alive, but a part of him was dying right before Zenith’s eyes and the man she loved was forced to sit back and watch it, to see how it unfolded, second after grueling second. How cruel to have courtside seating to such a thing, and now, he was lashing out, fighting an invisible demon.

“It’s like… it’s like I’m trying to make him stop acting out, make him wake up.” He sighed as he pulled away from her and leaned against a nearby wall. “He was
never
like this… I know it’s kinda funny, the things he says, but he wasn’t like this in front of me, Silver. Yeah, he’d joke around sometimes, but my grandfather was a serious man, a strong man. I never heard him say anything like what he does now. It’s like he has Tourette or something.

“He showed the utmost respect to my grandmother. He’d kiss her cheek, be real loving. Paw held himself to a high standard and knew how to behave, okay? I just don’t know how much longer I’ll have him… and I miss… I miss him already and I can’t make this shit stop. I’m trying to stop a train with my bare hands, and it’s not workin’…it’s just not workin’.” He swiped at his eye, trying to get rid of a budding tear.

“Zenith, let me tell you something, baby.” She looked up at the tall, beautiful man before her and framed his gorgeous face with her hands. His dark, almost pitch black eyes glistened like melting snowcaps when a sheen of tears threatened to pass through but didn’t dare betray him. “You have to cherish what you
do
have, right here, right now.” The man nodded, but the hurt in his eyes was so deep, she wasn’t certain he was convinced. “Don’t try to stop time, to become a superhero with something completely out of your control. Do you know that loving him, taking care of him, and enjoying him right
now
is a gift to you and him, honey?” He turned away, withdrawing within himself. “Look at me, Zenith… Come on, baby.” He did. “All you can do is make the best of what is going on right now, okay?” she stated softly before landing a kiss on his lips. “You’ve got me; you’re not alone. When you hurt, I hurt, too. I love you. I’m here, okay?”

“…Okay.”

“Let’s go back in.”

Back in the dining room, she sat back in her seat before Zenith could pull out her chair again. He sat next to her and stared at his grandfather. She wondered several times what was going on in his mind.

But then, as if by miracle his face split in a grin as they both watched the old man polish off his gumbo.

“Paw…”

The old man looked up, like an innocent youngster with a bowl turned up, blocking everything but his eyes.

“I love you, crazy old man… I love you.” Zenith reached across the table and tapped the man’s wrinkled hand. Paw smiled, a child-like smile, an innocent smile, and simply nodded.

It broke Silver’s heart, but she kept a straight face. She kept her chin up, her back straight, because her man needed someone to lean on, and she’d be that crutch in his time of need…

S
ilver’s kitchen was
littered with greasy motorcycle parts. Zenith walked inside the room, which smelled of heated oil, and shook his damn head.

“You should never try and mess around and do a man’s work…ouch!” He rubbed his suddenly sore ear from the slap that stung the damn thing.

“Are you going to help me or not?” She sulked, falling down onto a lone kitchen chair with a seat cushion that was flatter than a pancake run over by a Mack Truck.

“Look, don’t sit over there having an attitude.” He got on the floor and opened his toolbox. “Looks like you made things worse.”

“Oh, be quiet, would jah? Just help me!”

“This is not your expertise,” he carried on, determined to have his say. “Knowing about how a bike works, the mechanics of it, and how to fix it are two different things.”

The evil woman crossed her arms and mocked him in a dopey voice: “…The mechanics of it, and how to fix it are two different things…”

Chuckling, he wiped his hand along his dirty jeans.

“I could be doin’ other shit, but instead, I’m here getting ready to fix my girlfriend’s mess and do you know the thanks I get? I get a bunch of mouth, no cleavage, no water, not shit. You didn’t ask me if I was hungry, needed to smash, nothing!”

Silver burst out laughing as she hopped to the refrigerator in her socks. “What do you want, baby?”

“What do you have?” He glanced at her a time or two out the corner of his eye.

Damn, look at her ass in those black jeans. My woman is a dime.

“Let’s see,” she bent down to check the contents and move them about. “I’ve got a half bottle of wine, some milk, some pink grapefruit juice… um, some orange soda, but I think it’s flat.”

“What type of wine is it?”

“Blackberry merlot.”

“That’s for pussies. I thought you had some
real
shit.”

“Look.” She shot him a faux death glare, “I’m not a bartender and you aren’t the star attraction so choose from what I have or keep it movin’.”

“I choose ass…”

“You can’t drink ass.” She slammed the refrigerator door shut, but he didn’t miss the twisted grin on her face as she sat back down and watched him work.