She reached leisurely behind herself and scratched her neck.
“Fuck… I hate what’s happening. I think I like you.”
He burst out laughing, so much so, his complexion deepened at least three shades right before her eyes.
“I, uh.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. “I like you, too, Silver.” He pulled out his credit card and set it on the table, face down.
“I’ll pay. I asked you out after all.” She reached for her purse.
“Don’t, I’m serious,” he dismissed. “It doesn’t matter; we’re here. My grandfather raised me, by the way,” he said on an exhale. “He taught me some rules for dating, and this is one of them. The man always pays for the first few dates. Even when I’ve been broke, I still made sure I never went on a date I couldn’t pay for. The broke days are over, but it’s important to me.”
“Are you sure?” She held tight to her purse a few seconds longer.
Nodding, he gripped his keys. Just then, the waitress returned, grabbed the check and card, and disappeared.
“Zenith.”
“Yeah?” He looked leisurely around the place then back at her.
“I enjoyed tonight. Thanks.”
“Thank
you
.” He winked and smiled. “Let’s do this again. I need to look at my work schedule and I have gigs all next weekend, even on Sunday, but maybe we can meet up for lunch or coffee or something in the next few days?”
“Yeah, that sounds good. I’d like that.”
The waitress returned. “Here you are, sir.”
“Thanks,” he mumbled as he slipped his card back into his wallet and placed it back inside his pocket. “Are you ready, baby?”
The question was simple enough, but something about the way he said it sounded borderline perverted. And she liked it.
“Yes, I’m ready.” She grabbed her purse, stood to her feet, and before she knew it, he was behind her, gently sliding her coat on. He reached for her damn wrist as if they were about to dance, and he helped her with the task as if he’d been practicing this moment for weeks. And he smelled good… so fucking good. The scent of the barbecue mixed in with his cologne, and it was simply divine. His thick hair swept slightly against her cheek as he took his knuckle and gently scratched at the side of her mouth.
“You had some sauce on your face.”
He grabbed her hand, practically dragging her out the front door with him as they rounded the corner and made their way towards his parked truck. It seemed as if they were quiet for the longest time—just their footsteps against the concrete, marching side by side. He opened her door, helped her inside the thing, then got settled. Before she could say hello or goodbye, he started the engine and pulled out the space. Soon after, he reached for the radio knob and out blared “Just Be a Man About It” by Toni Braxton.
“Oh my God! I haven’t heard this song in years.”
“I was about to turn this mess off. Some women’s’ anthem…” He chuckled. She playfully punched him in the shoulder, having no clue what came over her. With a cursory glance, he slid his hand against hers, and intertwined their fingers.
It felt good…damn good…
…Several minutes later
S
he needed help,
she didn’t need protecting, but something about Zenith made her feel safe—like not a damn thing could happen to her as long as he was around. As he drew closer to her house, she began to fidget and dance about in her seat.
Please don’t have him ask to come in!
His cologne wafted past her once more as a slow heat emitted from the car vent.
That’s some nasty, trifflant shit! I never fuck on a first date… so wrong! I hope he doesn’t ask me… Please don’t ask me, Zenith.
“So, you want to—”
“Yes!” she blurted.
He laughed lightly. “You haven’t even heard what I was going to say.”
She sat there and damn near died… The curse of embarrassment rarely got a hold of her ass, but tonight, it had her on lock.
“I was going to ask if you wanted to meet up at Recess Coffee House this upcoming Tuesday. Sound good?”
“Uh, yes, that sounds fine.” She gripped the damn door handle, needing to cool her nerves.
He shot her a side-glance and then another. His gaze landed momentarily on her fingers that clutched the door.
“You alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“Why are you squeezing my hand so hard then and acting like you about to jump out of a moving vehicle?”
“I…” She hesitated, then launched into a fit of laughter. “This is ridiculous. I have no idea why I’m acting like this.” She shrugged. “I don’t know, Zenith. I don’t date much anymore and when I have done so, I was eager to get home. This time, it’s different.”
“I can’t tell!” He grinned.
“I know. But it is… Anyway, here we are.” A few moments later, he pulled up in front of her house. Cutting off the engine, minus the music playing softly, he leaned back in his seat.
“Well, I’ll call you tomorrow. Is that okay?”
“Yes, that’s fine.”
She looked straight ahead, then closed her eyes to relish the sound of the leather seat crunching beneath him. She could feel his presence as he moved closer and closer to her and then, he delivered exactly what he’d promised—a kiss. Wrapping his hand gently around the back of her neck, he brought her in close. They looked into each other’s eyes for a brief moment, and when his lips laid a gentle kiss atop her scalp, pressing into her freshly braided hair, she closed her eyes again. He lifted her chin to lay another peck on her forehead.
A few seconds later, he kissed her nose…
And then, he trailed his plush mouth downward, slowly, tenderly, until his upper lip rested on her cupid’s bow. They swallowed simultaneously as he slowly parted his lips and pressed them to hers, overwhelming her senses, over and over again. She melted against him, wrapped her arms around him and pulled herself impossibly closer, kissing him with the same fever and passion, perhaps surpassing him altogether.
Using two fingers to her jawbone, he gently tilted her head to the side… and then, he laid a soft, heated kiss upon her neck. She moaned aloud, sighing and coming undone, her panties soaking in her appreciation. Applying a gentle massage on the back of her neck, he continued on until he reached her collarbone. She sighed a bit louder when he pressed her harder and tighter to him, and licked and kissed all along that spot, varying the pressure points, making her melt in his embrace. He trailed one hand along her shoulder, and a deep, throaty groan escaped his lips.
“You smell so damn good.” He moaned before kissing her cheek, then stared into her eyes.
“Thank you. So do you.”
“Can I come inside?”
She froze. Just moments prior, she was willing to throw caution to the wind, suspend her brain, and fall in line with a pussy that was doing a lot of wet talking—spurred on by a bold need that begged for release. But bits and pieces of her charred and damaged emotions reminded her what the damn deal was; her conflicted self writhed about internally, turning into a remorse-flavored stew and boiling to a perfect temperature.
“Zenith, look.” She pulled away from him ever so slightly, affording herself a bit of space to lay her thoughts out plain and simple. “I like you. I liked you when I saw you at the club; I was attracted to you but just wasn’t in the mood to socialize. I was glad I had a second chance when we saw each other at the store. So, with that said, I’m not going to lie. Yeah, I want you to come inside…” She flipped her thumb towards her front door. “I want you
so
bad. I feel whorish saying that, but I do. You know I do. It’s the truth.”
“Then invite me
in
…come on now, don’t overthink it.” He leaned forward and kissed her again, making it hard as hell to not give in to the shit, to relinquish her post. But, she resisted… she placed her hands gently on his chest, pushed him back and dared to look up into his eyes.
“It’s probably not a good idea. My mind isn’t okay with this… my heart isn’t okay with this, either. My body’s vote doesn’t count.”
He gave a slight nod and stared blankly out of his window while his hand rested lazily over the steering wheel.
“There’s a reason why, and I’m going to tell you. I hate to spring this shit on you.” She looked down at her lap. “But, you were right.” She slowly glanced back up at him.
“Right about what?”
“What you said at dinner… I’ve been through some things and it’s…it’s hard for me to connect to people now sometimes. I know I can seem cold and uncaring at times, but that’s not who I really am… It’s just hard. I’m not a gushy, mushy kind of woman, either… but I do love, I do care… I care a whole lot about many things actually.”
His silence unnerved her a little, her inability to read him and figure out what he was thinking at that moment. Regardless, she pressed on.
“I was married some years ago. It was my high school sweetheart.” She sighed.
He turned back towards her, his expression brimming with interest.
“We didn’t work out obviously, got divorced, but we still cared about one another and to some degree, we remained friends. I can’t believe I’m sayin’ this shit.” She shook her head in disgust and turned away from his scrutiny.
“Tell me, I want to know. I’m tryna be quiet so you can just talk and feel alright doing it. Come on, I’m listening.”
Smiling—a faint smile—she continued.
“Like I said, we still cared about one another. He was involved in some shit he shouldn’t have been, and I got tired of it…”
“Drugs? Using or selling?”
“Both, but more selling than anything else. It’s like he just wouldn’t grow up and stop it! It caused the end of our marriage. I resented him for that, but tried to just move on… Yet that resentment caused me to hate him sometimes. So anyway, he’d call me every now and again and say ridiculous things. Usually, I’d ignore him and everything would be back to normal the next day or two. Like, he’d tell me he borrowed too much money from someone and needed a loan, or that somebody was jealous of him and trying to take him out. He lied a lot; he was paranoid, so…” She shrugged, looking out the truck window at nothing in particular, lost in a daze. “I figured on this one night that he called, it was just the same ol’ thing… but it wasn’t… It wasn’t, Zenith.” She swallowed the emotion that rushed to the surface with the force of a tsunami—took a lot of will power to stay calm. “He was in trouble. He called me…and I, uh… I blew him off. His own mama didn’t know he begged me for help!” Her chest grew warm from the confession. “She was a good friend to me. I can barely look that woman in the eye now. I hate myself for being so damn shady.”
Why am I telling this man my secret? Confessing?! Stop it… just stop it!
Zenith gently took her arm and pulled her closer, giving her permission to set her soul at ease, giving her a place to let it all out.
“He begged you for help and then what?” he asked calmly, bringing her back into the moment.
“I… I cursed him out, accused him of doing the same stuff he always did and then… soon after, he was found dead. Somebody killed him, shot him up. He told me someone was after him and now he’s gone ’cause of me. All he wanted to do was come over… That’s all he wanted!” A lone tear streaked her cheek. With the slow swipe of his thumb, he chased it away… so careful, so gentle, so kind.