Read Gregory's Rebellion Online
Authors: Lavinia Lewis
“
Mate!”
* * * *
Gregory had never been so happy. As he stared down at Hayden’s face, contorted with pleasure, and heard him scream out the word he’d been longing to hear since the moment they met, a rush of pure adrenaline surged through his body. It was like a tidal wave of pleasure threatening to drown him. He was certain it would embarrass him later, but as he spent himself in his briefs—still gripping Hayden’s overflowing cock and crying out his name—he didn’t care. Nothing mattered but the man beneath him. His mate.
When he finally stopped trembling, he opened his eyes and looked down at Hayden’s face. He wasn’t sure what he had hoped to see there, surprise maybe or happiness, even a small amount of fear, but the one thing he prayed not to find was regret. Relief unlike any he’d known coursed through his veins when he took in Hayden’s wide eyes and open mouth. There was definitely surprise etched on his face but beyond that was wonder, awe and a little incredulity.
“You’re… You’re…” Hayden couldn’t finish the sentence.
Gregory placed a hand under his mate’s chin and tilted it until their gazes locked. “I’m yours,” he said with conviction.
Hayden choked out a sob. “You knew,” he rasped. “All along you knew.”
Even though it hadn’t been a question, Gregory answered with a nod.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
Leaning down, he placed a gentle kiss on Hayden’s lips. “Can you honestly say you would have believed something like that without feeling it, without experiencing it for yourself?”
“I don’t know,” Hayden said quietly. He seemed to think about it for a moment before continuing. “I guess not.”
“I didn’t think so. It was something you had to find out for yourself.”
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” The words were spoken so quietly Gregory had to bend lower to hear them, and when he let them wash over him, he didn’t like them.
His reply stuck in his throat but he choked it out. “What are you sorry for?”
Hayden rolled out from underneath Gregory and sat on the edge of the bed, covering his face with his hands. He scrubbed them roughly over his eyes then got up and headed to the bathroom. Gregory thought he wasn’t going to get a reply but then Hayden stopped just inside the door and turned to look at him, his eyes full of sadness and pain.
“I’m sorry you got landed with me for a mate. Someone like you deserves better than someone like me.”
Before Gregory could argue or refute or even shout at his mate for being so goddamn stupid, Hayden disappeared into the bathroom and locked the door, signalling the end of that particular topic.
The hell it was.
Gregory fell back on the bed and tried to gather his thoughts, to calm some of the anger building inside. Had Hayden’s parents throwing him out made him feel that worthless, or had something else happened since? Was it because of his scar? Gregory knew there was a story behind the scar, but he couldn’t force it out of Hayden. His mate had to
want
to tell him.
Whatever the cause, Gregory was determined to get to the bottom of it. If it took him the rest of his life, he would show Hayden how precious he was, how invaluable. He would make him realise he was someone that deserved to be cherished…to be loved.
* * * *
The ride back to Texas had been difficult for Gregory. A stony, uncomfortable silence had filled the car and every time he’d glanced at Hayden, his mate had been staring out of the passenger window, chewing on his bottom lip. Gregory had made a few feeble attempts to lighten the mood and to involve Hayden in a conversation about the Crazy Horse and some of the people that worked there, but for the most part Hayden had replied with one-word answers and offered nothing in return.
The mating bond was something that shifters revered, something they cherished, but Hayden was acting as though it was the worst thing that could ever happen to a person. His indifference to their bond made Gregory’s heart ache. Didn’t he realise how good they could be together? Didn’t he care? Since Hayden had emerged from the bathroom that morning his cat been absent, shoved back into his hiding place, and now Gregory wasn’t even sure if his mate could feel their bond anymore. He wasn’t sure about a lot of things. Hayden was a mystery, and he wasn’t forthcoming with any clues.
When the journey was nearly at an end, about five minutes from the Crazy Horse, Gregory decided to question Hayden because the not knowing was killing him. They probably wouldn’t get the chance to talk when they arrived at the ranch and then he’d have to report to the council, so their talk had to happen now.
“Aren’t you happy we found each other?” he asked, taking his eyes off the road for a moment to glance at his mate. Hayden shrugged.
“That’s not an answer!” Gregory snapped. “Is it me? Are you sorry your bond is with me? Don’t you like me?”
“I like you,” Hayden said quietly. “I just don’t get how you could like me. Let’s be honest here—if it wasn’t for our bond, you wouldn’t have given me a second look.”
Gregory lost it. “Don’t fucking tell me what I would or wouldn’t have done, Hayden! You don’t even know me! For your information, I watched you for three goddamn days in Las Vegas when I should have picked you up because I was mesmerised by you, couldn’t take my eyes off you, and that was
before
I got anywhere near you and knew anything about our damn bond!”
“Is that true?” Hayden whispered, eyes wide with surprise.
Gregory placed a hand on Hayden’s knee and squeezed. “Yes, it’s true. I wouldn’t lie about something like that. You intrigued me, and, damn, but I thought you were beautiful. Still do. And before you say anything, I didn’t even notice your damn scar. Are you ready to tell me how you got it?”
Gregory didn’t need to be looking at Hayden to tell that his entire body had stiffened.
“I can’t talk about it, I’m sorry.”
Gregory sighed. He didn’t want to have this conversation while he was driving, so he pulled over on a quiet road just before they reached the lane that led to Kelan’s ranch. When he switched off the engine, he reached out and took hold of Hayden’s hand. It felt small in his, but fit perfectly nonetheless.
“You know there’s
nothing
you can’t tell me, right? There is not a single thing you could say that could make me think any less of you, if that’s what you’re worried about.”
Hayden snorted. “That’s bullshit. I could tell you a ton of things that would not only make you think less of me—they would make you hate me.”
“No, Hayden, you’re wrong.”
“Am I? Do you know what I did to survive when my parents kicked me out, huh? Shall I tell you, Gregory?” The anger radiating from Hayden crackled in the air between them. “Fine! If you want to know so goddamn much, I’ll tell you exactly what I did. I—”
“Hayden—” Gregory interrupted.
“Sold m—”
“
Hayden
!” Gregory’s voice boomed out in the enclosed space and Hayden snapped his mouth shut.
“I know,” Gregory said, lowering his voice and staring into Hayden’s eyes. “I know what you did.”
“What? How do you know?”
“Your records at the council. I read them before I came to Vegas to pick you up. They said you’d been arrested twice for solicitation.”
Hayden’s gaze fell to his lap and his cheeks filled with colour. “And you still want me?”
Gregory sighed. “Hayden, you did what you had to do to survive. I don’t blame you for that. But it’s in the past. It’s not who you are today.”
A tear escaped Hayden’s eye and trickled down the line of his scar. Gregory wiped it away with his thumb then leaned over and pressed his lips gently to the spot. Hayden gasped and tried to move his head but Gregory wouldn’t let him. He grabbed it firmly and trailed his lips from the top of the scar, just below his eye, to the bottom, above his lips.
A low moan tore from Hayden’s chest and he turned his head so that their mouths pressed together lightly.
“I don’t deserve you,” Hayden said against his lips.
“You deserve far more than I can ever give you,” Gregory replied. “But I promise I’ll try to give you everything you could ever want.”
Hayden started crying in earnest then, great heaving sobs that wouldn’t seem to abate. Gregory wrapped Hayden in his arms and held him, rocking him gently until he’d cried the last of his tears and finally grew quiet. Gregory pulled back to take a look at his mate’s face and the pain and guilt all present brought a lump to his throat. When Hayden next met his gaze he looked resigned.
“I need to tell you,” he whispered. His voice, though quiet, was rough and raw with emotion. “I can’t hide it any more. I have to tell you the truth. I’ll understand if you never want anything to do with me again.”
Gregory held the back of Hayden’s head and looked him square in the eyes. “You can tell me—I promise I won’t judge you. There’s nothing you could say that would make me want to give you up.”
Hayden opened his mouth several times before he finally found the courage to speak. “I’m a murderer,” he said at last. “I’ve killed people.”
Chapter Five
Taking in a steadying breath, Hayden kept his eyes on Gregory’s face even though he was terrified of the reproach and rejection he might see there. He should have known better. Gregory didn’t flinch. His hand stroked the back of Hayden’s head gently, sending shivers down his spine. There was no accusation in Gregory’s eyes, only curiosity.
“I might not have known you for very long, but I don’t believe you would have done something like that except in self-defence. Is that what happened? Did someone try to hurt you?”
Hayden’s voice sounded distant when he next spoke. “Yes.”
Gregory sighed and kept up the soothing strokes to the back of his head. “Is that what you’ve been keeping inside for so long? The reason you won’t shift. Is it out of guilt?”
Hayden’s first instinct was to protest but he’d come this far and knew he had to go on. “Yes, in part.”
“Tell me what happened?”
Hayden nodded. Gregory knew what he’d done now—all that remained were the details. Hayden had never told his secret to another living soul, and although it had been difficult to say the words, it was a relief to finally get them off his chest. He didn’t want Gregory’s pity, he didn’t want absolution. He just needed to be able to share the burden of his secret, which had become too heavy for him to carry alone.
“About three years ago, I was drifting, moving around from place to place. I never spent longer than a week or so in each town or city back then. I always preferred cities because, with a larger amount of people, it was easier to get lost in the crowd.
“I’d spent some time out east, but I didn’t like it there so I was making my way back to California when I got a lift to Des Moines with a trucker.”
“What was his name?”
“Ramon,” Hayden managed to say. “Ramon Lopez.”
Gregory stroked Hayden’s face with a whisper-light caress and, for the first time, Hayden didn’t flinch when Gregory’s fingers ghosted over his scar. He barely noticed, too lost in the painful memory.
Hayden drew in a shuddering breath and continued. “Ramon said he was picking up a load the next day and that he could take me as far as Denver. I’d travelled with him from Indianapolis, and I didn’t like him. There was something…off about him, but I couldn’t work out what it was. He was quiet for the most part but he had these black eyes and when he trained them on me, they left me feeling cold. I was pretty desperate to get back to Independence, though, so I said I’d go with him.”
“Independence?” Gregory questioned.
Hayden attempted a wobbly smile. “I used to like to shift and hunt in Kings Canyon, but…I never made it there.”
Hayden felt tears sliding down his face, but he didn’t acknowledge them. Gregory leant forward and pressed a kiss over his scar and Hayden couldn’t help flinching in response. It was an involuntary action that would take a long time for him to overcome. If Gregory had noticed, he didn’t acknowledge it.
“If this is too difficult for you, you can tell me another time,” he offered.
“It’s okay,” Hayden shook his head. “I’d rather get it over with.”
Gregory nodded. “If you’re sure.”
“I left him that night so I could shift and hunt then met up with him the next morning. We headed south to Kansas City, which I thought was an odd direction to take but he said the I-70 was a better road to travel on than the I-80. I didn’t know shit about roads so I went along with it. Not like there was much I could have said anyway—he was the one driving. Anyway, we got to Kansas City, and when we pulled up in the truck stop Ramon said he needed to call a friend and to wait for him outside the store.
“When he came back there was an even darker glint in his eyes and his mood had changed. He seemed…excited, I guess. He said he hadn’t seen his friend in a while and that he was going to meet up with us so we could grab a drink together. He knew how old I was but he said he knew a bar where the owner wouldn’t ask any questions and he’d buy me a couple of beers. I didn’t like the idea all that much but I didn’t have anything better to do so I agreed to go.
“His friend showed up and he seemed all right, at first. His name was Mario, but I didn’t catch his last name. To be honest I didn’t have any feelings about him one way or another. We went in his car. I thought we were going straight to the bar, but Mario said he needed to stop at his house because he’d come straight from work and he wanted to grab a shower and change his clothes.”
Gregory raised his eyebrows and Hayden nodded. “I know. I can’t believe I was so stupid, so naive. As soon as we got inside the house, I knew something was up. It was obvious they’d planned it all along. Mario started making comments about me to Ramon, saying things like he thought I was pretty and that he’d always liked twinks. The comments were harmless enough at first but they started to get more lewd. He said he hadn’t been laid in ages and maybe I’d like to help him out.”
“Why didn’t you leave?” Gregory asked. “As soon as you became suspicious?”