Green Broke Woman (12 page)

“Travis, don't! I can't do this!” she sobbed.
“I need you to be different.”

A cold chill of reality blew through him when
he realized what she was. He wasn't lying on top of the same girl who'd
professed her love for him seven years ago. He was lying against a victim, looking
down into the hazel eyes of lost innocence. A sickening nausea assailed him
when he saw a thousand unshared horrors in her haunted eyes and heard a
thousand unheard screams in the silence.

Kayla had been raped.

Travis immediately got off her and pulled his
boxers back on, watching her in heartache and anger. “Who hurt you, Kayla?”

She sat up, seeming humiliated and
uncomfortable. “Nobody hurt me. I just don't want you touching me.”

“You did seven years ago.”

“Well, things are different now.”

“You mean before you were—”

“Get out.” She raised her voice before her
eyes squeezed shut in anguish. “Please.”

He heaved a frustrated sigh and left,
flipping the light off on his way out.

She screamed.
“Oh God, the
light!”

He barged back into the room and flipped the
switch on, stunned to see her in the fetal position, bawling and shaking
violently with terror. He hurried over to her and then sat on the bed, bringing
her into him. “
Shh
. It's okay.”

She clung to him, sobbing uncontrollably. “I
never should have gone to California. I should have stayed here. I never got
famous like I wanted to. I should have stuck around and waited for you to pull
your head out of your ass and like me.”

He had to smile at her little slur against
him. “I should have made you stay. Better yet, I should have pulled my ass out
of my head. I meant that the other way around.” He snickered, pleased at her
soft giggle. “
Darlin
', I loved you then, and I love
you now. You were just so young at the time and I didn't want to scare you off
with my needs, but I've mended my mistakes and foolish way of thinking.”

“I love you, too,” she said tearfully,
kissing his shoulder and holding him tight. “I wish I had stayed.”

“So do I, but you're here now and that's all
that matters. You are planning on staying, right? I noticed you only had a
purse with you and no luggage, so I didn't quite know what to make of that.”

Kayla sniffled and scooted back, brushing the
tears off her cheeks. “I'm back for good. I'm never going back there.”

He didn't miss the way she shuddered, looking
like she might vomit over whatever memory haunted her.

“What happened in California, Kayla?”

She stiffened, keeping her eyes lowered. “I
fucked up my life. That's what happened.” Her eyes watered again. “And now
because of it I can never be with you.”

He smiled, relieved to prove her wrong as he
wiped away the soggy trails from her face. “What are you talking about, girl?
Of course, you're
gonna
be with me. I've only been
holding out for you for years. I mean there were a few girlfriends, but it was
never like what we had.”

“We only had friendship.”

“I know.”

She seemed touched by his words.

He weaved his fingers through her sleek
strawberry blonde hair and took in all of her lovely features. “Who hurt you,
darlin
'? Tell me. Let me take your pain away.”

Her head lifted, and all traces of light had
left her eyes. “You can't heal me, Travis, not unless you have a cure for HIV.”

His heart nearly stopped beating in his
chest. “What?”

She wept soundlessly as she spoke. “I don't
have mono. I have HIV.”

It was just as devastating to take in the
second time she said it. “Are you sure?”

She nodded. “I was tested, and it came up
positive. I don't know if it's turned into AIDS yet or not, but I really need
to get to the doctor to see if they can give me some kind of medicine to make
it more bearable.”

He tried to process the information, but his
brain seemed unwilling to entertain the thought of his lady being ravaged by a
deadly disease that would only result in her death.

Her voice cracked. “Now you know why I can't
be with you. You deserve a clean woman who can give you healthy babies and
share a long life with you. I can't give you those things.”

She buried her face in her palms, bawling
like mad.

He gawked at her, still in shock. “Kayla, I
don't really know what to say. I'm so sorry. Is there anything I can do?”

She sniffled and swiped her arm under her
nose, shaking her head. “Just take me to the doctor tomorrow. Oh God, look at
me, blubbering everywhere like a weepy clown. I'm sorry.”

“Don't be. I want to help you.”

“I just need to be alone right now. Please.”

He brushed her arm in a caring sweep before
taking his leave. “
It's
gonna
be all right, Kayla. I'll take care of you.”

She nodded bleakly. “Thanks.”

Travis exited the room, leaving the light on
this time. Kayla had a lethal disease. His baby cricket wouldn't get to have
the life he planned on having with her.

He wandered back into his room and planted
his butt on the edge of the bed, spying the picture of him and her with his two
brothers on the nightstand. He snatched it up and absorbed every detail. It had
been warm that day, he remembered. Kayla had been in a silly mood, and he
recalled hoping she didn't feel his erection through his pants as he and his
two younger brothers huddled together around her while their mother had taken
the picture.

That was what he wanted, oddly enough. He
wanted to keep her with him and his brothers for always and never let anything
happen to her. But something did happen to her, and he couldn't help but feel
that if he'd only taken her up on her offer years ago and made her his, none of
those terrible things would have happened to her. She wouldn't have been raped
or whatever
else,
and she wouldn't be dying either.

Tears welled in his eyes, and the power
permeating off the picture provoked him to do something he hadn't done in years.
He wept. Kayla was his perfect match, but he'd let her go and now it was
killing her.

Chapter
Six: Mind-Fuck

Kayla walked out of the clinic in a
zombie-like trance. It didn't make sense. What the fuck was happening? She
climbed up into the truck, feeling warm when she took Travis's big hand and he
pulled her up onto the bench seat with him.

“Well?”

Her lower lip quivered as she foundered for
her words. “They said I didn't need medicine. I had them test me like you
suggested, and the results were negative.”

His face perked with enthusiasm, though he
appeared skeptical as well. “You mean you healed?”

“I … I don't know. People don't just heal
from something like that. I don't understand. I had a positive HIV test back in
California.”

“Maybe they mixed up your test with somebody
else's.”

She shook her head, still trembling with
shock. “I don't think so. He showed me the results. I looked over them very
closely.”

“Who did?” Travis took her hand in his, using
his callused thumb to stroke the top of her hand.

“My employer.
The clinic sent for my medical records just
to verify the results. They should know here soon why that happened.” Her head
went back against the headrest. “Somebody screwed up somewhere. I just really
hope it was Dr. Smith and not these guys. I don't want to die.”

Travis squeezed her hand and made his tone
firm. “You're not
gonna
die, Kayla. I won't let that
happen. Come here.”

She smiled and scooted toward him, feeling
safe and like she'd come home when he took her in his arms.

“Damn, I was so worried about you. That
scared me to death what you said last night. I need you to be safe right here
by my side.”

She melted into his strong arms, feeling
completely moved by the beauty in his words and the passion that motivated
them. “Thank you.”

“You want to grab a bite to eat? Now that
you're not stricken with that awful disease, you may as well enjoy some real
food. How about some fried chicken and all the fixings?”

She grinned, mouth watering in remembrance.
“That sounds yummy.”

****

Kayla stood under the deluge of hot water,
basking in the swirls of steam rising around her. The high water temperature
felt relaxing to her muscles, but her spirit felt empty and numb. She couldn't
stop thinking about her dad and how she'd disappointed him, and to a point, he
her. But she loved him and knew he'd loved her back. She'd give anything to
have more time with him, or at least a fleeting moment to tell him she was
sorry.

Then there were the conflicting test results.
The negative today was as much a relief as it was alarming. Which was the
accurate reading? She could be walking around with a deadly disease in her, or
she could be perfectly fine. She was probably clean given the favorable newer
test results, but that dreaded “what if” still gnawed at her imagination.

Had Beck Hammond created fake test results to
scare her into obeying him? He’d sometimes used her supposed medicine as a
bargaining chip to gain her cooperation. He’d gone on and on about how she
would never be able to afford the medicine on her own and that she needed him
to pay for it. Had those pills even been medicinal or a mere placebo?

“Kayla.”

She stiffened, head jerking at near
neck-snapping speed when she heard Travis's voice as he entered the bathroom,
shutting the door behind him.
“Yeah?”

“Do you mind if I sit in here and talk to you
while you wash? I won't look at you
none
, and I
promise I'll leave before you get out.”

She nodded, feeling dumb when she realized he
couldn't see her do so through the opaque shower curtain. “That's fine.”

It sounded like he sat on the closed lid of
the toilet seat. “I want you to tell me—”

“Let me go first.”
Anything
to keep his pesky questions from unearthing her soul-scarring past.

“All right, go ahead.”

“What did you mean yesterday when you said
that you, Jake, and Keith had waited for me?”

A telling pause occupied the space she
expected his answer to.

“The three of us have loved you since you
turned eighteen.”

She felt her lips tweak to form a sassy half
smile. “Everything magically changed on my eighteenth birthday, huh?”

“Well, we might have—and the key
word is
might
—have
noticed you a few months or a year before that. We were kind of in denial,
though, because you were so young.”

Her head dropped to watch the water run down
the drain. It was there, and then it was gone, like passing moments in her
life, never to return. Haunting, tragic lyrics ran back through her head,
touching and breaking her heart as the song reminded her that nothing lasted
forever but the earth and sky.

She shoved the heart-wrenching lines from her
head. “Was that the only reason you turned me down that night all those years
ago—because I was so young?”

“Well, that and the lifestyle we live.”

“Ranching or BDSM?”

He hesitated before answering. “Both.”

“I'm a lot stronger than you think I am,
Travis.” That was an understatement. She'd been through hell and survived
somehow.

“I know you are. You're the strongest woman I
know.”

She wouldn't take it that far. His sister,
Miranda was a hell of a lot stronger, but Kayla's heart warmed at his praise.
“Thank you.”

“You're welcome. We all had a fight about
you. After the way you professed your love for me and I turned you down, then
you cried your eyes out over seeing Jake with another woman, and you ran to
Keith and let him kiss you.”

She recalled the intoxicating bliss and
amorous sweetness of that first kiss with Keith Langley.
Pure
heaven.
Travis and Jake had walked into the orchard and seen Keith
kissing her. The brothers had argued and then basically turned on her and all
but called her a fickle flirt. The words still hurt, but she'd eventually
accepted the label and let her dream of being with all three of them die.

But somehow it hadn't. Despite the horrors
she'd suffered and the years that had gone by, she still loved them all dearly,
and the dreamer in her still imagined the four of them together. It wasn't
realistic, but her heart refused to listen to reason as it repeatedly asked
“Why not?”

“We quit talking to each other for a while,”
Travis continued. “It got real ugly, but then we made up and just tried not to
talk about you. It finally blew up in our faces, and we realized we were all in
love with you. We got this crazy idea into our heads that if you ever came back
to us we would share you and make you our wife.”