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“I want you to put your hands on your hips,” she said. “No, not like you're angry. Like, naturally.”

“I don't naturally put my hands on my hips,” I said. At this, Ainsley got involved, repositioning my fingers and pushing my hands higher on my waist.

“Now put one foot in front of the other, like this, love,” Jacinta said, demonstrating. “And lean forward just a little bit.”

“Hinge at the waist!” Ainsley said.

“Hinge at the waist!” Jeff shouted.

“I'm hinging!” I shrieked. “I'm hinging!” He and I dissolved into laughter. Jacinta smiled good-naturedly.

“This is serious,” Ainsley said. “What's your name again? Natalie?”

“Naomi,” I said. “We've met every summer since we were eleven.” It couldn't have been the champagne any longer, but
something
sure had me feeling saucy.

“Okay, I'm bad with names. Naomi. This is a big deal. A. Big. Deal. You want this photo to look amazing. So hinge at the waist.” Obligingly, I hinged at the waist. Jacinta began snapping away from different angles, encouraging me to grin, then to smile slightly, then to look serious, and to open my eyes wider. Eventually, she was satisfied and lowered her camera.

“Perfection, love,” she said.

Ainsley nodded authoritatively. “I agree,” she announced with an imperious air, as if anyone cared. Jacinta ignored her and wrapped me in yet another hug. “Don't forget about Delilah, okay?” she murmured into my ear.

“I won't,” I whispered back.

“Jacinta,” Ainsley said eagerly, “I'm going to get something to drink. Would you like something?” Jeez. Ainsley Devereaux wasn't the type of person to care about anyone's needs other than her own. She must really be starstruck by Jacinta Trimalchio.

“I would, Ainsley,” Jacinta said. “And so would Jeff and Naomi, I'm sure, wouldn't they?” Ainsley looked briefly horrified by the prospect of being a cocktail waitress, but she quickly hid her distaste for the task by smiling insincerely.

“I'd like a ginger ale, Ainsley,” I said sweetly. “Thank you
so
much. You know what? Have him put some vodka in there for me. Why not?” Jeff patted me on the back approvingly.

“Fetch me a Stella, won't you, Ainsley?” he said with his usual charming smile. Ainsley rolled her eyes at him.

“And I'll have a lemonade, love,” Jacinta said, lightly resting her hand on Ainsley's shoulder. Ainsley immediately brightened up at her touch.

Ainsley caught sight of Misti passing by, and reached out and thumped her on the shoulder. It struck me as quite rude, but that seemed to be Ainsley's style.

“Hey, can you get us a Stella, a lemonade, a gimlet, and a vodka ginger ale?” she said. It was more of an order than a question.

“Sure,” Misti said automatically, with a forced smile.

“Thanks,” Ainsley said, her voice dripping with fake honey. “You know, I
heard
you were very . . . accommodating. Really giving. And now I see it's true!” She smiled brightly, and a few of the other girls fought back snickers. Misti ignored them and went off to get the drinks.

“Ainsley,” one of the girls whispered with delight. “You are
so bad
!”

Ainsley laughed. “What? I was just being friendly.”

“You're friendly like a snake is friendly,” Jeff said. Ainsley stuck her tongue out at him.

Jacinta led Jeff, Ainsley, and me back to a table near the house. She flagged down one of the fangirls, who brought us caramel popcorn at Jacinta's request.

“Popcorn for the big show,” Jacinta said.

“What big show?” Jeff and I asked in unison.

As if in response, the sky above us exploded in sparkling red and white peonies and chrysanthemums and starbursts. On top of everything else, Jacinta had arranged for a fireworks display. An obsequious Misti brought us our drinks and hurried away quickly.

“How'd you get a permit for this?” Jeff asked as everyone in the house poured out onto the back lawn to watch the fireworks.

“Oh, I didn't worry about a permit,” Jacinta said, laughing lightly. Ainsley copied her, laughing too.

“You've got chutzpah, Jacinta Trimalchio,” Jeff said admiringly, clinking his beer bottle against her glass of lemonade.

“What is a ‘chutzpah'?” Ainsley asked.

“It means guts in Yiddish,” Jeff said as another round of white stars blasted the sky above us and a cheer went up from the crowd. “Kind of like courage. At least, in the modern sense, that's how it's used.”

“I always forget that you're Jewish,” Ainsley said. “That's so cute.”

“Yes,” said Jeff. “We're just adorable.” He grabbed my knee under the table and squeezed, and I did the same to him. Suddenly the two girls I had seen getting high in the bathroom rushed past us, squealing and giggling.

“Pool party!” one of them shrieked, stripping down to her underthings and jumping in the river pool, which was illuminated from below by lights. Then the Fitzwilliams sisters, seemingly even drunker than before, took off
everything
and splashed down, followed by the delighted Stetler brothers. The crowd roared its approval, clapping and hooting and whistling, while the fireworks concluded overhead and the band on the deck struck up another jaunty tune. More girls and guys followed suit, some jumping in fully clothed, some in their underclothes, and a few more girls completely naked. I hate girls who do stuff like that just for attention. They reminded me of a couple of the Beasts back home, Melissa Donnelly and Madison Delaney, who were famous at school for getting drunk and making out for the football team's benefit at every single Homecoming dance. Skags calls them fauxbians.

“Ugh,” Ainsley sniffed. “That's disgusting.”

“I don't know,” Jeff said with a smile. “I think it's lovely—from an artistic perspective, of course.” I punched him on the arm, and he cracked up.

It was getting pretty late, and the party seemed on the verge of devolving into some giant drunken orgy. I wasn't really up for that. I'd already shown up at an East Hampton party by myself, made out with a boy I'd just met the day before, and posed for some big-deal blog. Enough personal firsts for one night.

“I think it's time for me to head home,” I said. Jacinta was visibly disappointed.

“Oh,” she said a little sadly. She clasped my hand in hers. “Well, you
must
come over again soon. And at the next party, you must come early and get ready with me. You can always stay over afterward in the blue room if you want!” With some satisfaction, I noticed Ainsley's look of jealousy.

“I'll get going, too,” Jeff said, rising. “It's been a wonderful party, Jacinta. Thank you so much for inviting us.”

“You were
invited
?” Ainsley asked, aghast.

“Yes, of course,” Jeff said. “You think we'd just show up at some stranger's house without an invitation?” Ainsley's bitter silence made it clear she had done just that.

“Oh, Ainsley, love, I simply didn't get to send out invitations to everyone I wanted here,” Jacinta said graciously. “In fact, I
only
managed to get notes out to Jeff and to Naomi today. I just put the word out and figured all my favorites would make it here—and most of them did.” Her smile faded for a moment, but just when I noticed its absence, it popped back into place.

“Now tell me about your bag, love. It's absolutely precious.” Mollified, Ainsley smiled and launched into a monologue about Louis Vuitton. Jeff and I backed away slowly. Jacinta blew us kisses.

“Do feminists mind gentlemen walking them home?” he teased.

“This feminist does not,” I said. “After all, who knows what dangers lie between here and the house next door?”

“Georgica Pond is typically a hotbed of gang activity,” Jeff said.

By the time we reached my back deck, the sounds of splashing, shrieking, and music had gotten a little softer, although it was still pretty noisy. Jeff asked me if he could see me again soon, and I said he could. Then he gave me a long, lingering kiss that left me tingling from head to toe. When he walked away, I wondered for a second if we could fall in love. Then, of course, I felt like a complete dork, because I'd only gotten my first kiss like an hour previously and I was
already
thinking of L-O-V-E. It must be because I was a little drunk. That vodka and ginger ale hadn't exactly sobered me up.

I opened the sliding glass back door as quietly as I could, and crept up to my bedroom. I flopped down on the bed, still fully clothed, and stared up at the ceiling. It had been a weird but awesome night. I waggled my feet in the air and looked at my sandals. They were actually really pretty. So was my whole outfit. Maybe my mom wasn't so stupid. Maybe East Hampton wasn't so stupid. Maybe this summer wasn't going to be as stupid as previous summers.

Then I noticed the ceiling was spinning gently, and I flopped my legs back down, dropping one foot to the floor for stability (another trick Skags taught me). I focused on my breath and soon drifted into a pleasant, boozy sleep. The last coherent thought I had was that I hoped my mom would make popovers and eggs again the next morning.

CHAPTER FIVE

M
y phone buzzed with an incoming text, and it sounded like a cluster of killer bees had descended on my room. When you're hungover, everything is louder.

I groaned and rolled over, noticing that my sandals were still on. I kicked them off, and they thudded to the floor.

I groped for my phone, which rested atop a side table assembled from discarded wood that had been used on some dead rich person's yacht. (In my mother's house, every object has a fancy origin story.)

The text was from Delilah. It read,
Sounds like SOMEBODY had a pretty sexy night! ;)

I blushed and texted back,
Not SEXY. I don't move that fast!
☺

She wrote,
LOL. I'm soooooo glad you had fun! Next time don't say no to tennis!
☺

I wrote,
I won't. Promise!

The weirdness of girly-texting with Delilah Fairweather was actually less intense than I'd thought it would be. Could I be getting used to talking to her like a real friend? And if I were used to talking to her like a real friend, did that mean she
was
a real friend?

This summer was getting odder by the day. Since when did I happily and comfortably swill champagne with the sons and daughters of America's finest families? I started to analyze the previous evening the way I always do the morning after a party, but I stopped after a few seconds. Maybe it was my hangover. Or maybe it was something else—a conviction that I was going to do things differently this summer. Maybe I didn't need to overthink
everything
.

I checked the time on my phone: 12:00 p.m. I was really surprised my mother had let me sleep that long. Had some spirit of kindness possessed her? Or had she been so enormously pleased by my decision to go to the party that she'd decided to indulge my love of sleep?

It turned out to be the latter reason. When I shuffled off to the bathroom to take a shower, she ambushed me in the hallway, full of questions.

“Was it fun? Did you have a good time? You must've had a good time—you're still in your party clothes! Whom did you meet? Any boys? What was the Jacinta girl like? Did Delilah go to the party?”

“I'll tell you after I shower,” I said.

The hot water felt incredibly good on my skin, and I realized to my relief that I didn't have a monster headache or stomachache—I was just tired and a bit out of it. Because I knew it would give my mother a little bit of a thrill (I couldn't say why I cared to give her one, but I guess I was in the mood to be nice), I put on one of the new Marc Jacobs dresses she'd hung in my closet—a simple, sleeveless cream-colored cotton sundress with an A-line skirt. I checked myself out in the mirror, and I had to admit I looked good in it. I was starting to realize that my mother had smart instincts with clothes sometimes.

Downstairs on the back deck, my mother actually clapped a little when I came outside and sat down.

“Oh my God, Mom,” I said. “Seriously?”

“No cartoon T-shirts or ratty jeans!” she said. “You look fabulous. Now sit down and tell me everything.”

She'd laid out oatmeal in simple white bowls with small white containers of honey, brown sugar, chopped walnuts and almonds, and mixed fresh berries. This was accompanied by a mini-omelet. My mother loves making miniature versions of regular food. “We all know Americans need to eat less,” she said once on a very special Thanksgiving episode of her Food Network show. “And I'm delighted to be part of the solution.” She went on to teach everyone how to make mini–organic turkey meatloaf with wee servings of organic mashed potatoes and organic gravy. I doubt anyone obeyed her command to “eat less this Thanksgiving, for your waistline and your world,” but I can say with authority that at that Thanksgiving, she ate exactly one spoonful of mashed potatoes and a small arugula salad.

I attacked my omelet first, surprised by how much I was craving grease and protein. Of course, with my mother's cooking, you got very little grease—the concept of fatty foods grossed her out—but the protein was there in abundance. After I inhaled the omelet, I set to work on the oatmeal, which was delicious. She'd flavored it with cinnamon and a touch of nutmeg, so it tasted like Christmas.

“So tell, tell,” Mom said, pouring me a glass of fresh-squeezed orange juice. “Who was there?”

I recounted as best I could the list of attendees. I hadn't been able to identify too many people, but I told her about Ainsley Devereaux, the Fitzwilliams sisters, a few friends of Delilah I'd seen jumping naked into the pool (I didn't tell her that part), the Stetler brothers, and Jeff Byron.

“Jeffrey Byron!” my mother exclaimed delightedly. “You know, his father has expressed interest in buying shares of Bake Like Anne Rye!, Inc. when we go public later this summer.”

“No, I didn't know that,” I said, shoveling berries into my mouth. “His dad's a music producer, right?”

“Darling, don't speak while you're chewing. And take your elbows off the table. Yes, Herman Byron owns Byron Records. I couldn't tell you any of the names of his artists, but I know he's
very
successful. He's on the Vineyard for the summer.”

“With his new girlfriend. I know.”

My mother raised her eyebrow and looked at me inquisitively. “And how would you know that? It wasn't in any of the papers.”

“Jeff told me.”

My mother's eyes widened with sudden excitement. “Jeff told you! Oh, he must like you if he confided in you.” She withdrew a tube from her purse and delicately patted a bit of moisturizer with sunscreen on her face. My mother is obsessed with avoiding the ravages of time and sunshine.

“I don't think it's a secret in his world.”

“But you talked to him!”

“Sure. The other day when we came from Manhattan, and last night at the party. He's nice. We . . .” I tried to stop myself from saying it, but part of me just really wanted to tell someone. “We rode the Ferris wheel.”

My mother let out a little squeal and clapped her hands again. I turned red and felt a flush of anger.

“Oh, I can't believe it! You chose the perfect summer to start acting like a real girl.” She sighed happily. “Anne Rye's daughter and Herman Byron's son. Thank you, darling. This is going to be so good for me.”

“It has exactly nothing to do with you, Mom,” I snapped. “Would you just let me have something of my own for once? And there isn't even a something to talk about. We rode the Ferris wheel. That's it.” I immediately regretted putting on her stupid dress.

“Don't get an attitude with me, Naomi,” she snapped back. “You may not care about your social life or your future—or mine—but
I
do. I've spent your whole life caring enough for the both of us, and now it's starting to pay off.”

“Are you seriously taking credit for this? God, you're a narcissist.”

“And you're a brat.” We glared at each other. Just then, a smiling face appeared at the side of the deck. Jacinta's white-blond bob and enormous Fendi sunglasses were a welcome distraction from my annoying mother.

“Hello!” Jacinta said. “I hope I'm not interrupting your brunch. I just wanted to pop over and introduce myself.” She smiled winningly at my mother, who immediately shifted into her public mode, all perfect posture and poise.

“Come on up,” I said. “Your timing is perfect.” My mother shot me a side glare as Jacinta walked up the steps and popped her sunglasses up on her head.

“I'm Jacinta Trimalchio, the girl next door,” she told my mother, shaking her hand. My mother beamed.

“Oh, Jacinta,” she said. “It is so wonderful to finally meet you! I was just looking at your world wide website yesterday and marveling at how lovely it is. Naomi is a
huge
fan.”

“Well, I'm a huge fan of Naomi's,” Jacinta said. “She's featured on the site today, in her Marc Jacobs dress from the party.”

My mother smiled at me triumphantly. “I picked that out, you know,” she said proudly.

“How wonderful,” Jacinta said. “You have exquisite taste. In fact, you inspired me! This is Marc Jacobs as well. A bit less subtle, but I do enjoy it.” She was wearing a long, silky red sleeveless dress splashed with colorful flowers.

“Darling, sit down.” My mother patted the chair beside her. “Shall I fix you an omelet or some oatmeal, dear?”

“Oh, thank you, Ms. Rye. I don't want to pass up on a chance to try your cooking in person, but I've already eaten breakfast.” Jacinta settled her long, impossibly thin frame into a chair. “But I would love a glass of orange juice.”

“Call me Anne. And you
are
tasting my cooking, because I squeezed it myself not twenty minutes ago.” Mom giggled as if it were the funniest thing in the world. Jacinta took a big sip.

“Perfection,” she said, and my mother shot me a satisfied smile, as if she'd won whatever secret competition she thought we were in.

“I hope the noise last night wasn't too awful, Anne,” Jacinta said apologetically.

“Not at all,” Mom said. “I barely heard you. But then, I'm a heavy sleeper.” I wanted to add that her over-fondness for Ambien might have something to do with it, but I kept my mouth shut.

“The police did pay us a visit right after you left, Naomi,” Jacinta said. “It was the fireworks. They were nice, though, and didn't give me a citation for that or the underage—um, or anything else.”

“Personally, I think liquor laws in this country are an atrocity,” my mother sniffed. “In France, where I trained, children are educated about wine drinking as an art form.” I tried not to roll my eyes.

“I came over to steal Naomi away for lunch, but I see you're brunching,” Jacinta said.

“Oh, Naomi can go,” my mother said. “She only had her little omelet and half her oatmeal. I'm sure she's got room for more, don't you, Naomi? You always did have a big appetite.”

“Yeah, you know what?” I said. “I'd really like to eat something different. Let's get out of here.” I stood up quickly, nearly knocking over my glass of orange juice.

“We'll take my car,” Jacinta said.

“Good,” I said. “Because I don't have one, so otherwise we're walking.”

Jacinta's car turned out to be a spotless, shiny little white Mercedes-Benz convertible she'd leased for the summer. The car would've immediately caused a stir on my block in Chicago, but here in East Hampton it was just one of the many luxury vehicles lining the town's streets. We drove into the Village of East Hampton and parked near BookHampton. Jacinta told me she wanted to take me to “the most
divine
new restaurant, love. It's called Crave.”

It wasn't exactly divine, but it sure was out of this world—out of the world of East Hampton, anyway. It felt more like a hip spot in Soho or Tribeca, with its sleek interior, exposed pipes, minimalist modern furniture, and thumping music. Even the model-gorgeous waiters and waitresses seemed to have been imported from an episode of
Sex and the City
. It was the kind of fancy place where the waitress looks bored by your very presence and where the daily specials include things like gently tormented brussels sprouts and severely slapped salmon with a blackberry attitude reduction. It was too trendy for my mother, but she would've approved of the tiny portions.

Jacinta seemed eager to tell me her life story. I still couldn't figure out why she singled me out, but I didn't want to question it. “I'm a year older than you—I'm eighteen. I just graduated from a teensy little boarding school in Switzerland, nothing anyone here has ever heard of. It's really itty-bitty, barely forty students. But I was only there for my senior year, because before then I was traveling all over the world, popping in and out of schools for a semester here and there, but mostly being privately tutored.”

“Homeschooled?” I asked.

“No, tutors. My mother and father are diplomats, and they're too busy to spend time teaching me calculus and French. My father is from an old Spanish family—they're aristocrats—and my mother is from a family of Montana ranchers. The wealthiest cowboys in the Wild West, she used to say.” Jacinta laughed and took a sip of her passion fruit–watermelon iced tea.

“So where did you grow up?”

“Oh, everywhere. All over. Too many places to name,” she replied, and I immediately felt the ember of suspicion in my mind. Given my question, most people would proudly rattle off a list of cities to prove how well traveled they were. Either Jacinta was just humble or she was lying.

“So can you speak Span—”

I hadn't even gotten the question out before Jacinta swiftly answered, “No, my father never taught me.”

“Oh.”

“Just English, and French, from school.”

“Ah,” I said.

“I grew up in so many places that I never had the chance to really put down roots or make friends,” Jacinta continued in what sounded a little like a rehearsed speech. “That's why I'm so glad to meet you, Naomi. It'll be so fun to have a real friend this summer.”

“Where are your parents, anyway?”

“Oh, they're on assignment, love. In Europe,” Jacinta said. It all sounded very exotic to me.

“I decided I wanted to have some fun on my own this summer,” she said. “You know, without Mother and Father.”

I was about to ask another question, when a pretty thirty-something woman with long brown hair and expensive-looking highlights approached our table. She wore those oversize late '80s–early '90s glasses that always look so ridiculous in movies from that time period (and in real life, if you ask me, but I'm not exactly up on trends).

“Excuse me. You're Jacinta Trimalchio, aren't you?”

Jacinta smiled at her. “That's me, love.”