Goodbyes and Second Chances (The Bleu Series Book 1) (19 page)

“A guard at each
gate and one to patrol the grounds should do it.” He’s scrolling through his
smartphone as he talks. “They’re on their way.” He looks up from his phone with
another flashy smile.

“Who’s gonna
keep the daredevil safe with all those toys you just hauled in?” I ask
skeptically. Tate laughs like I just made a joke. “I’m not joking.” As I say
this I watch the daredevil in question zoom up on the golf cart. He jumps off
before the cart completely stops, climbs the side of the trailer, and hops into
the boat. I can see the dimples from here as he checks things out. He
disappears below deck for a few minutes and then bolts over the side quickly to
exchange some words with the driver. I watch as the driver pulls a CD case out
of the cab and hands it to Dillon to sign with a Sharpie. After Dillon
autographs it, he shakes the driver’s hand with a manly slap to his back and
jets inside where we are all watching him.

“Jewels is
mine,” Dillon says as he eyes me excitedly. He likes saying that, I do believe.
“Tate, my man, you need to help Jen for the rest of the day.” He’s already
pulling me towards the door before I can protest.

“The pleasure
will be all mine, boss,” I hear Tate say. Jen giggles at this. Good grief.
              

“What are you
doing, Dillon?” I ask as we head over to my cabin.

“Today is our
day and we are celebrating.” He looks down at me with a bit of apprehension.
“You didn’t forget, did you?”

“No, Dimples. I
didn’t forget.”

He leans over
and kisses my cheek. “Good. Because we got a lot of celebrating to catch up on,
pretty girl.”

Once we are
inside the cabin, he points to my small armoire. “Bathing suit, preferably a
bikini.” The excitement is radiating off Dillon as he rummages through a
shopping bag I hadn’t noticed before and pulls out a pair of board shorts.
Without thinking twice about it, he is naked and redressed before I can tear my
eyes away. And there is nothing
boy
about that body anymore. Just let me tell you. I feel my face grow red from the
peep show. “You like what you see, pretty girl?” he asks as he pushes his long
bangs out of his eyes and stares at me seductively.

I let out the
breath I was holding and shuffle over to the armoire to grab a bathing suit. I scurry
off to the bathroom without answering him. The man can totally fluster me, even
after all of this time.

“No need to be
shy now,” I hear him say with a chuckle before I close the door.

I change into the
suit and make a quick call to Leona. “I need some more time.”

“Okay. Will’s
going to start wondering what’s going on. It’s getting hard to keep him
distracted enough to not want to head over there to see you,” she says.

“I know,” I
whisper. “I just need one more day. If I can, I’ll break away later and go see
him.” I end the call and shake off my guilt before heading out of the bathroom
to see what the plans are for the day. It’s been a hot spring, so a day on the
lake sounds heavenly. I am a bit excited about the boat ride. It looked pretty
impressive from afar.

Within thirty
minutes, we are cruising along the crystal clear lake in style. Dillon can
drive anything with an engine and is at the helm like he was born to be. He is
wearing only the dark-blue board shorts and a tattered hat low on his head. His
dazzling eyes are masked behind a pair of designer sunglasses. With his tattoos
on full display, he looks tough and untouchable. He is definitely drool-worthy.

People are
gawking as we pass. Some have been trailing us and taking photos. I nudge
Dillon. “Dimples, you know you are broadcasting with this boat. Why would you
want to put your brand all over it?”

“I’ve worked
hard, Jewels. I should be able to enjoy it all I want.” He grins and those darn
dimples take my breath. “I owed my woman a boat, and I want no one doubting who
she belongs to.”

“But, what about
the photos?” I look out over towards the shore and spot a few professional
looking cameras aimed our way.

“Let them have
their pics. There’s nothing I want to hide. I want the world to know you’re
mine,” he says proudly, but it makes me nervous. Good grief. There he goes with
the whole
you’re mine
caveman
attitude again. If he wanted me to be his so badly, then why on earth did it
take him so long to come home and lay claim to me? I want to ask him this, but
I keep quiet. I’m not ready to stir up the trouble the both of us will have to
face soon enough.

I keep my sunhat
pulled low and don’t take off my own designer sunglasses Dillon gifted me
earlier. I definitely do not take off my bathing suit cover-up either.

As the day
strolls along, Dillon drops anchor right in the middle of the lake and heads
below deck. He reemerges carrying a picnic basket. I’m instantly impressed. Or
I am until he starts pulling a tub of pimento cheese, pork rinds, a loaf of
white bread, and RC colas out. I have to laugh as he sets up our white-trash
picnic. He’s grinning too.

“I really missed
this stuff,” he says as he spoons some pimento cheese in his mouth, before
assembling us a sandwich.

“I’m surprised
you don’t have it shipped to you in California,” I say as I take my first tangy
bite. It is really good stuff.

Dillon just
shakes his head and gives me a knowing look. “Some things are worth waiting
for, Jewels.” And I believe those words.

My throat
thickens at this statement. “What took you so long?” I whisper and am thankful
he didn’t hear me.

Dillon eats two
sandwiches, and then uses the pork rinds to dip out the rest of the pimento
cheese from the tub. He then digs us each out a double-stuffed moon pie. The
gooey, chocolaty, marshmallow goodness is heavenly with the icy cold cola.

We stretch out
and snooze in the late afternoon sun afterwards. Dillon has been stroking my
finger on my left hand for quite some time. He has taken his hat and glasses
off so I watch him stare at my bare finger. I know what he’s thinking, and soon
he tells me bluntly as only he can. “You need to put your ring back on where it
belongs.”

“You’re such a
caveman.” I laugh, causing him to growl. He sounds like one too.

He leans over
and starts tickling me. “You. Mine. Ring. On. Finger.” He is now mimicking a
caveman and I’m laughing so hard my sides ache. I’ve missed him so much.

I laugh until an
image of Will trying to tickle me in the same manner pops in my head and my
stomach flip flops. I still all of a sudden and am baffled by how easy it has
been to forget all about my troubles.

Dillon senses my
sudden change and pulls me close to his side. He skims his nose along my neck
and stops at my ear to places a kiss there. “What’s on your mind, pretty girl?”

I should
probably protest him calling me this, but I don’t. He’s either called me Jewels
or pretty girl all my life. I like his little names for me. I like it even
better because just last year his band released a ballad that won them a Grammy
for song of the year. The song is titled “Pretty Girl on My Mind”. I know the
song was to me, and I cried off and on for a month after its release. Will
thought I was losing my mind.

“We are going to
need to have a serious talk. It doesn’t have to be today. Today can be our day.
But there are things we need to discuss soon.”

He peels my
shades off and finds me near tears. “You’re worrying me.” His brows are pinched
with concern.

I pull him close
and kiss him with all the longing and regret I can pour into it. “Tomorrow. Not
today. Love me completely today,” I murmur against his lips. I take his words
that he spoke to me all those years ago and give them back to him.

He takes them
willingly. “Tomorrow,” he says, and doesn’t ask about it for the remainder of
our day.

We try to
sunbathe with boats constantly passing and passengers calling out to Dillon.
He’s a good sport and waves at all of them. He seems to know just how much
attention to give the fans as well as making his boundaries clear at the same
time. The man is a pro. With the sun setting, Dillon glides the boat back to
the dock. When we arrive, Tate is there waiting to take over the task of tying
the boat down for the night.

We stroll back
into my cabin, and I feel pleasantly sun-kissed and groggy. It’s been an
amazing day. A day I can hold on to after I mess everything up with Dillon.

Chapter Sixteen

Midday on
Saturday, I stroll back into the small cabin to find it empty. There’s a note on
the counter. It makes my stomach cringe, and man has my stomach been on a
roller coaster ride ever since Dillon returned.

Jewels,

Spent better part of the night looking for you.

What gives?

Mave and Max need me so I’m heading out.

Call me. I want that ring on your finger by the time
I get back.

Love, Dillon

BTW—Yesterday was incredible. I could write a song
about it
.

With this, I
head right back out the door. I have some making up to do with Will. I snuck
out after midnight to go see him. I promised Dillon the day and I gave him
every minute of it. But as soon as he was out for the count, I headed over to
Will. This double life is getting exhausting.

I find Will on
the couch at the townhouse, zoned into some movie on the large flat-screen. I
sneak up behind him and playfully place my hands over his eyes. “Guess who?” I
whisper in his ear. I feel his cheeks turn up in a smile and that makes my day.
He grabs ahold of my hands, so I drop them and give him a hug from behind. “How
‘bout you come home with me?” He nods his head and we are out the door in the
next beat. I take the Dillon reprieve to make it up to Will.

As we ease back
through the gates of the trailer park, Will’s eyes land on the luxury boat and
jets skis tied off at the dock and sticking out like a sore thumb. “Man, those
are tough. Why are they on the wrong side of the lake?” He may not have been a
local for very long, but Will already knows the way things are around here.

“Someone got
lost,” I say. I try to quickly dismiss this by going straight to our new cabin.
We pull up and I look over to see the question along his features. “Welcome
home!”

“Really?” I see
the excitement has now replaced the questioning look.

“Yep. It’s ready
for us to move in!” We exit the Mustang and he grabs hold of my hand as we go
inside to inspect our new home. It’s gorgeous too. The walls are cedar wood
paneling that rises and covers the ceiling as well. The smell, mixed with the
freshly lacquered wood floors, is heavenly. The living room is to the front
with a cozy kitchen towards the back. The upstairs is made up of two very roomy
bedrooms, each with their own bathroom. It’s not an extravagant house, but it
is to me and Will, and that’s all that matters. I just wish Aunt Evie was here
to enjoy it with us. I wish she could have met Will too. I know she would have
approved of him.

We spend our day
moving into our home, only stopping long enough for a pizza. Leona and Jen stop
in to help and to cut up with Will. He is such a charmer and women just
gravitate towards him. And believe me, he seems to not mind one bit. I catch
myself laughing as he animatedly tells the two some long tale. I definitely
have a certain type of man for sure. Charming is all I can say.

We spend our
first night in our new home and head to church this morning, a bit sore from
all of the moving but totally happy. We make it just in time for the opening
song. Will heads over to the small fellowship hall where he promised to help
Brina, our neighbor, with children’s class. Brina has become another close
friend of mine over the years. She is my age, but has her hands full with three
rambunctious boys. They remind me of the twins and Kyle so much. I help her out
as much as I can so she can work. Her husband left her a few months back and
has yet to return. I say good riddance. He’s a mean man, and I have seen him be
pretty violent towards her. I have already warned her if he returns they will
all have to go. I’m not allowing such chaos around here.

I ease into a
back pew beside Leona and am taken aback when I spot Dillon at the piano. My
happy-go-lucky mood evaporates instantly with him being in the same vicinity as
Will. This could be really bad.

The preacher
stands behind the podium to read the select scripture for the day and briefly
speaks. I’m ashamed to say I couldn’t tell you what he has said, because all of
my focus is on Dillon. He sits patiently behind the piano, wearing a pair of
black dress slacks and a grey dress shirt. The sleeves are rolled up with his
tattoos exposed.

I lean over and
whisper to Leona, “What is Dillon doing?”

“He arrived here
before you and the entire church begged him to play,” she whispers back as she
rubs her beautiful baby bump. She is due in only a few weeks, and I’m pretty
excited to have a baby girl I get to help spoil. Her sweet husband, Grant, sits
on her other side while holding her hand attentively.

“Now I know that
was a short message, but I feel God has us a message waiting through song
today,” Preacher Floyd says, drawing my attention back to him. With this he has
a seat on the front pew and all eyes fall on Dillon.

Dillon’s hands
move over the piano and the sanctuary comes to life with the melody so sweet.
His head is bowed towards the keys and his eyes are closed. The small space has
just been transformed into a cathedral with the fluid tunes Dillon beckons from
the piano keys. His hands glide gracefully over the instrument. He plays for a
while before adding the lyrics to “Amazing Grace.” This rendition is slow and
sends chills all over me. He sings quietly and you know he’s not singing to us,
but only for God. He is worshiping Him with this marvelous gift he has been
blessed with, and the entire sanctuary is swept away in awe. Amens are breaking
out all over and the spirit keeps growing sweeter and sweeter. I don’t even
realize I’m crying until Leona hands me a tissue.

The next song
Dillon brings forth from the piano is “Cry Out to Jesus.” He plays a few keys
before saying, “This is for Aunt Evie.” This song is about grief over a loved
one lost long before their time, and how you just didn’t feel like you had the
opportunity to say goodbye. In times like that, all you can do is cry out to
Jesus. I have done plenty of that, and feel like doing more now. Dillon wipes
at his eyes a few times during the song and it chokes me up as well. I will
never stop missing Aunt Evie until I get to see her again one day in heaven.

There is not a
dry eye in the room by the time Dillon plays the last note. He plays through
several of Aunt Evie’s favorite hymns—“Love Lifted Me
,” “
I Surrender All
,” “
The
Solid Rock
,”
and
“
Just as I Am.” As he continues to play, I sit in this pew and
mourn over the mess I’ve made. And for being in love with Dillon and not being
able to stop it. Tears quietly slip down my face and I dab them away with my
sleeve. It’s completely soaked through. I don’t know how to reconcile the wrong
I’ve done to Dillon and the wrong I’m doing now to Will. I sense Dillon drawing
to a close, so I scoot out the back door to head home before he can stop me.

*
* * *

Everyone
has decided that this Sunday’s meal is at my place, so I hustle over to town
and grab a bucket of fried chicken with all of our favorite sides along with
two gallons of sweet tea. I haven’t set the kitchen up yet, so the beggars
aren’t allowed to be choosers today.

Once
everyone is content with a generous plate of food, I slide out the back door
and scoot over to my small cabin. I didn’t eat; worrying Dillon was going to come
to the new cabin looking for me. The Harley is parked beside it just as I had
suspected. Before I open the door, I already hear that he is inside playing his
guitar. The mellow guitar riffs float outside, welcoming me. I nearly lose my
nerve, but push on through the door anyway. It’s time I come clean with him
about Will.

He smiles
up at me from the couch and sets the guitar down. He’s changed into T-shirt and
jeans and is casually barefooted. “You and your disappearing acts are starting
to bug me, Jewels.” His dimples disappear when he takes in my expression. I’m
sure it’s a mixture of guilt and regret. “Just drop it on me and get it over
with,” he says brusquely. He’s a lot like me in this sense. Just rip the
Band-Aid off in one quick snatch. No poking around it.

I can’t
look at him, so I study my hands as I confess, “There’s someone I need to tell
you about.” It comes out in a choked whisper, and I look up to make sure he has
heard me. His brows are deeply furrowed in anger. Yep. He heard me. The hurt is
etched all over his face.

Dillon is
off the couch in an instant and is towering over me. “Who is he and where is
he?”

He’s
scaring me, so I take a step back with my hands in front of me. “Leave Will out
of it. This is just between you and me.” I’m shaking a bit and try to calm
down.

“You can’t
marry him! He can’t have you!” Dillon shouts.

“I know
this.” I begin to cry.

“Oh, so
you’re just going to shack up with him? God don’t think too highly of that
crap!”

I think
it’s Dillon who doesn’t think too highly of this. I’m getting this all wrong.
“You don’t understand—”

“You’re
my
wife, Jillian!” He’s called me
Jillian and I think I’m going to throw up. He kicks the toy basket, launching
it across the room. I’ve never seen him so upset. It’s scaring me.

“I know
I’m your wife. I was there when we said the I do’s!” I shout back at him.

“Well. I’m
starting to wonder if you didn’t get the whole reason for those vows. You ran
off on me the very next morning.” Dillon is running his hands through his hair
aggressively. “Does Will even know you’re married?” I shake my head because
it’s the truth. I’ve never told anyone but Leona that I married Dillon five
years ago. Yesterday was the first anniversary I actually spent with him. This
has to have been the longest long-distance marriage in the history of
marriages. And maybe the most screwed up.

“He’s a
special part of my life,” I try to explain but I’m getting it all wrong.

“But
you’re mine.” He is still glowering over me.

“If you’re
so keen on wanting me as your wife, then why on earth did you stay away for so
long?” I’m getting mad now. Hot tears spill down my cheeks.

“I let you
push me away. I was broken at first. Then I got good and pissed with you. I
figured I needed to prove myself worthy of you, so I set out to becoming a man
worthy enough. You’ve took care of me all my life, I was determined to fix it
so I could take care of you for the rest of yours.” His voice goes hoarse, so
he stops to clear his throat. “Then the next thing I know, I’m on tour, then in
the studio recording another album. Another year escapes me and then the
international tour got underway. I blinked my eyes and lost five years, but I
gained so much in that time.”

I’m
crying, so even though he’s fuming with me, Dillon wraps his arms around me. “I’m
not that boy who blindly ran off into the world nearly a decade ago. I’ve done
a lot of living since then. I’ve seen a lot of life that I needed you there
for. My life ain’t right without you. I’m lost without you.” He runs his hand
through my hair. “Even before things started going down with Mave, I knew it
was time to come home. You’re my home, Jewels. Please tell me it's not too
late.” His eyes redden with hurt.

I don’t
know how to explain. I open my mouth to speak when I see a change in his
expression from my hesitation. A bit defeated, he releases me and starts
packing his bag. “I’m spending the week with Max,” he says between sniffs.
“Mave is going through some brutal withdrawals.” He’s shaking his head in
frustration. “I got to focus on that right now. Mave has to be my top
priority.” He shoves his wallet and keys into his pockets, and then pulls on
his boots in aggression. Once his bag is packed, Dillon faces me. “You’ve got
one week to let the dude know you have a husband. Put your wedding ring back
on,” he says vehemently, pointing at my ring finger. “Or be ready to sign some
divorce papers.” The last part is only a hoarse whisper. He slams the door on
the way out, and moments later he is peeling out on his bike.

I watch
him disappear through the gates and realize I have just screwed up big time.
That was not how I envisioned that going at all. I stumble over to the rocking
chair and cry it all out as memories of my wedding keeps me company. That night
five years ago, Dillon had pulled that marriage license out of his guitar case,
beaming with hope and had asked me to commit to being his wife that very night.
He said he couldn’t wait any longer, and he needed me by his side. I was
shocked at first by the unexpected request, but quickly agreed anyway. How
could I not? My best friend, my first and only love wanted to keep me forever.
Of course, I agreed. With Ben’s help, Dillon had everything already arranged by
the time we had arrived at our little home church.

I pledged
my life to him in a simple ceremony that spring. It had been nearing midnight
by the time we were secretly tucked inside our church. Midnight has always held
a special time for us, always using that significant hour as a symbolic
testament to the importance for each of our loved ones. Although this time it
was chosen for privacy concerns, it still made the event that more sacred to
me. This was also the very place where Dillon had first admitted his feelings
for me, making so fitting to be the place he chose for us to commit to those
feelings.

The quaint
sanctuary had been illuminated with warm glowing candles and lent an intimate
feel to the evening. It was simple, yet breathtaking. As I walked down that
short aisle, my heart had beaten wildly in my chest, not from fear, but with pure
joy and excitement. Leona had lent me a vintage lace gown she unearthed on that
treasure hunt all those years ago in our shed. Dillon wore simple black jeans
and a white button-down shirt, but looked priceless. We vowed to love one
another completely that night before only God and our few guests, who only
included Leona, Trace, and the pastor. Nothing fancy by the world’s standards,
but it was perfect to me.