Good Side of Sin (10 page)

He shook his head. “You have nothing to be sorry about, skirt.”

“I wasn’t apologizing.” I looked away from him, so I could concentrate on not tripping over my feet on the way back to the chair. My legs suddenly felt wobbly at the thought of telling him my thoughts and receiving a kiss in return. “I just didn’t understand—” I lied, and then froze when his fingers reached out to touch mine as I walked by him. His light touch felt like a flame too close to my skin, yet it made me shiver; goosebumps rose on the flesh of my arms. I craved to feel more of the cold burn, but instead I reluctantly stepped away from him and sat down on the edge of the chair. It didn’t seem as comfortable now for some reason. I cleared my throat and avoided contact with those eyes of his. “You were saying?”

He huffed, and then I heard the shuffling of sheets and pillow fluffing. “If I didn’t deserve to be in the Syde of Lust before, I damn sure deserve to be there now, as well as in the other six sydes of Hell.”

He couldn’t possibly think he was to blame for the murders. I looked back to him, aghast. I couldn’t help it. “You think you deserve to be back in Hell because Lucifer is making you take the lives of innocent people? Thoros, this is not your fault! You may earn the blame for a lot of sins, but whatever
this
is, you’re not the one to be charged for it!”

The side of his mouth twitched as his eyes flooded with silent laughter.

I didn’t get it. “What?”

He turned onto his side and propped his head up on the palm of his hand. The sheet slid farther down that beautiful, sculpted chest to just a few inches below his belly button, and my eyes were instantly drawn to the edge of the cotton and the thin trail of dark hair that hid from my view. The groan escaped my throat before I even knew it had happened.

He chuckled and my eyes shot back up to his, alert and aware of what a complete idiot I had just made of myself. I couldn’t hide the flush that swiftly crept into my cheeks—another side effect the occupants of Heaven had recently begun to suffer from: we could blush now. How awesome is that? It’s not!

I couldn’t speak, but thankfully it appeared he was going to fill the empty void with his hypnotic voice. I had a few more moments to get control of myself—if that was even possible.
Hopefully that’s all I would need
.

“I was talking about you, Josselyn.” My name sliding off his tongue caused an instant tingling sensation between my legs and I fidgeted in the chair. He smiled.
Did he know?
“You are the reason I deserve to be in each of the seven sydes of Hell. Want to hear why?” He didn’t wait for my answer. “I think about you in some lustful way every day, often several times a day. I can’t help it; the more I fight it, the harder it crashes down on me.”

“You were the Prince of Lust. I could only imagine the inappropriate and vulgar thoughts that go through your mind about any female—of this world or not.”

He held my gaze, daring me to look away, and then just shook his head. “Not just any female. You are the only one that has even existed to me in over three months. I am envious of the sun that kisses your delicate skin through the window, because you do not shy away from the feel of it on your skin as you would if my hand or lips or body replaced it,” he finished on a seductive whisper.

Oh, God.
My eyes shot down to look at the plush carpet. I couldn’t look at him and listen to these lies, and I definitely couldn’t make it through the other five sins. “Stop,” I whispered, but he pressed on.

“The gluttony cuts me deeply as I crave to lick and caress and devour your body over and over again, but I fear I could never possibly get enough; one taste will only make me want a million more.”

Was he telling the truth? No. I was there. He betrayed me. I heard it with my own ears. Lucifer would have known he was lying! Thoros wouldn’t have even tried. He has to be lying now! I refuse to believe it! I have to get out of here!

“I deserve to be in Sloth because I am perfectly content never leaving this bed as long as you are the female that lies in it with me. We would never have to leave.”

“He’s lying!”
I told myself, scolding my own erratically beating heart for trying to betray me again.

“He’s not, Josselyn! Listen to him. Listen to your heart, child!”
Isaiah said through my thoughts.

“I can’t believe it! He betrayed me, Isaiah,”
I said, and then felt my eyes sting hot with tears. I couldn’t take this anymore.

“You only want me because I’m the only woman you can’t have! Just stop—” I looked up when I sensed quick movement, and then gasped a half second before he took my arms and swiftly jerked me to my feet. His arms locked around me so tightly that I knew I was powerless against him, and not because he was so strong, it was because I was so weak when it came to him.

My walls crumbled to the ground. His intoxicating scent and the immediate presence of his hard, half-naked body against mine, threatened to rob me of my sanity if I refused him. I was not going to come out of this game a winner. If I was being honest with myself, I had already lost.

“Isaiah…”
I sobbed in my thoughts.
“…Please help me.”

“Listen to him. Please, Josselyn, just give him a chance to explain.”

His eyes bore into mine and I didn’t feel the hatred and anger radiating from him that I’d sensed from him earlier. I felt confusion and hurt and fear from him now. I sensed his hunger, and that was extremely dangerous considering I felt a little starved myself. But above anything else, I sensed his honesty.

“I won’t stop—not until you’ve heard all of what I need to tell you.”

I swallowed again, and then nodded.

He bent his head down beside my neck and inhaled deeply. A low and distressed moan escaped his throat as if my scent both relaxed and tortured him at the same time.

“You fill me with greed, Josselyn. I want to keep you here with me, even against your wishes. I know I don’t deserve you, but I don’t care. I’m selfish.” My eyes fluttered shut as if his rough whispers were hypnotizing me. “I deserve Wrath, not because of the innocent lives I’ve recently taken, but because of what I did to you. No amount of apologies could ever earn your forgiveness, but I want you to know that I am truly, very sorry for what happened, for what I did to you. I would take it back and make it right if only I could.” His lips brushed my neck lightly and I sighed, and then allowed my arms to snake around his back to pull him in closer to me.

I waited a moment, but when he stayed quiet I breathed, “You forgot one.”

He stiffened, and then inhaled and exhaled once more before pulling out of the embrace. “Pride?” He took a step back, but didn’t break eye contact. “Yes—pride is what keeps me from acting on any of it. It’s what keeps me from taking you to that bed right now and making you mine!” he shouted as he pointed to the rumpled sheets, and then looked away from me. “You need to leave, Josselyn,” he said, his voice cracking with emotion and his body visibly shaking.

“I told you, Isaiah! He’s trying to hurt me again.”

“He’s not, child! Open your eyes and see that he’s trying to keep from hurting you.”

“You need to go find your angel boyfriend and never look back. I’m bad news. I—I’m damaged.” He took another step back from me. I let him go. “I don’t have to actually be in Hell to suffer from all these sydes. I am already there because of you, because I can’t have you, and there is no way for me to get out!”

He had stopped backing up, and the talking had subsided. I stared at him a moment. “Are you finished?”

He shook his head and let his shoulders fall as the breath left his lungs. “You don’t want me. I am the definition of sin.”

Catching him off guard, I walked the three steps to erase the distance he’d drawn between us, and then raised a steady hand to place behind his neck. His eyes were wide and scared, and it was clear that he was unsure of what I was about to do. I wasn’t sure myself; I just knew it felt right.

“Lucky you, I just happen to be the good side of sin.” I smiled, and then pulled his mouth down to mine.

This was it
.
Her touch. These lips. This burning fire of desire only she has ever been able to ignite, was threatening to engulf me. This was the kiss I had missed for over three months.

Thoros opened his mouth, gently nipping and sucking at her lips, teasing and encouraging her to give him full access. He wanted—no; he needed—more of her. She complied with an eager response, and he moaned in approval when his tongue met and brushed across hers, tangling with the warm and velvety soft muscle that threatened to bring him straight to his knees.

Is this what happiness feels like?
He felt the soft tickle as a tear left his eye and traveled down to his jaw line; he knew he’d never even gotten close to the feeling before now.
Heaven can’t possibly be any sweeter.

His fingers rushed up to dive into her blond locks and, tilting her head a little more, he opened his mouth and took full possession; he dominated what was rightfully his. Nothing would ever keep her from him again, including his own stubborn and stupid ideas.

His arousal grew thick and demanding behind his pajama bottoms and he backed her against the nearest wall, and then ground his erection against the thin material covering her sex until she broke contact with his mouth to let pure, undiluted desire erupt from her throat.

God, and didn’t the image of her body taut with lust only make him want her more. A growl started way down deep in his chest and ended when he captured her mouth once again.

Mine,
he thought, and lifted her leg up by the bend of her knee, so he could please her at a more intimate angle. The tip of him strained against the cotton and he broke away from her mouth to look into her passion-filled eyes. He wanted to watch her every feature as he teased and taunted her. It was important to him that she would leave this room satisfied.

If there had been any doubt or misinterpretation of the way he felt about her before, it had all faded away.

He pushed into her as far as the material would let him and growled at the restriction it had on him. Ripping the cotton to shreds came to mind, but he refrained; he didn’t want to scare her, for Christ’s sake!

Josselyn’s brown eyes fluttered shut as a moan escaped her throat. She rotated her hips, moving on him, seeking a way to take more of him; her back arched against the wall, forcing the fabric to stretch to its limit.

“Jossel—” he started to protest for her sake, but she bounced on the toe of her other foot, giving her the momentum she needed to throw both legs around his waist, and then she wrapped her arms around his neck and crushed her mouth down on his.

He took the subtle hint and turned toward the bed. What needed to be taken care of would not be done up against a wall—at least not with her fully clothed, anyway.

He had never in his existence felt so strong and so powerful. It was as if her touch and kiss gave him the strength he’d always felt was missing. His body tingled and his soul felt more whole now than it ever had before.

Is this love?
He felt sure it was. Lust was only a willowy faint smoke compared to love’s hot flame, and his heart instantly felt incinerated.

A pressure was building in his chest, growing tighter and tighter. It seemed the longer their lips met, the stronger it became. He feared it would be the death of him if he allowed it to fully consume him.

Only one thought entered his mind:
So be it.

He was less than nothing without her in his life. He would give her anything that was in his power to give, if only she would stay here with him forever.

He broke from the kiss to look in her eyes.
Is this what she wants? Does she really want me?
There was no doubt in her eyes, and he forced himself to slow down and lower her to the mattress with care. The feel of her body under his was even better than he’d dreamed of in the time they had spent apart.

He kissed his way from her collar bone up to her swollen lips. A fever swept through his body as they made contact this time. The tightness in his chest became almost painful, and he subconsciously lowered his left hand to press his fingers against his sternum. As the discomfort persisted, Thoros opened his eyes and tried to disconnect from Josselyn’s mouth long enough to catch a steady breath—he felt sure that was all he would need—but he couldn’t move; his lips were attached to her lips just as sure as if super glue bonded them together.

Even struggling did nothing to help; he was instantly so weak that even lifting a finger was too much.

Faster than he could blink, he found he was on his back with the angel straddling his torso, her mouth still attached to his, but the worry and anxiety Thoros felt rapidly building around the edges of his mind was not there in her hard eyes.

She was in total control. There was no emotion. No lust. No love. It was strictly business.

What is this?

He was just about to panic when he heard a demanding voice of authority in his head.

“Do not fight it, young prince. She is trying to help you.”

“Help me? She’s trying to kill me!”
Thoros shouted in his mind, because that was all he could do.

“I-I… I am almost positive that she is not.”

“I feel so much better now. You think you can get her off me?”

All of a sudden, it felt like someone shoved their hand through his chest and was trying to rip out his heart. A great scream tore from his throat as Josselyn released her hold on his mouth.

Barely managing to open his eyes through the severe pain, Thoros looked up at the bright yellow light and the five tiny orbs that traveled from his mouth into hers.

The souls. So that’s where the little bastards had been hiding!

The light disappeared, and so did his thoughts as he fell into the black hole of dreams.

Back in Heaven, I settled in quite comfortably in one of the extractor chairs and watched as the exorcist reclined the back so I was almost lying completely horizontal.