Gone (39 page)

To Sammie now, Clare said carefully, “I don’t know where they are.”

“Were you bad, is that why your mommy and daddy went away?”

Clare sensed that the question was no longer directed at her. “No. I didn’t do anything to make them go away. There isn’t anything a little girl or boy could do that would make their mommy and daddy leave them.”

Sammie’s fear was so like her own, Clare felt an ache in her chest. She too had once been a little girl afraid that she’d done something to make her mother pick up a gun and shoot at her. It had taken her a long time to stop blaming herself. Jolene was who she was and Clare was not the reason for her mother’s actions.

A silence dragged on. The air conditioner sent a fresh blast of cool air into the room. Clare kept her gaze on Sammie’s; it seemed important that she did.

“Uncle Jake says families don’t always have mommies and daddies,” Sammie said. “Uncle Jake says we’re a family ’cause he loves me and I love him.”

Clare reached out and gently smoothed Sammie’s tousled hair. “Your Uncle Jake is a very smart man.”

Sammie scooted back and plopped against the pillows. “In the next part, Goldilocks sleeps in Baby Bear’s bed. Read some more, Clare.”

Clare cleared her throat and found where she’d left off on the page.

“You have to turn the book more, so I can see the pictures,” Sammie said.

“Oh. Sure.” Clare did that, but then couldn’t see the text to read. She tilted her head, straining her neck.

Sammie slid across the bed, making space. “You can lay down too, if you want.”

After a brief hesitation, Clare got into the bed.

* * * * *

That was how Jake found them, nestled in Sammie’s small bed.

Laura had left him a voice mail message, letting him know that something had come up and that Clare would be watching Sammie that evening. He’d been surprised. Clare usually appeared uncomfortable around his niece. Apparently, not any longer.

He removed two open books from the foot of the bed, placed them on the nightstand, then kissed Sammie.

He bent over Clare. His gaze lingered on the necklace of bruises Rich Dannon had given her and his jaw clenched. She was an officer of the law and bruises happened sometimes in the line of duty. He couldn’t be casual about that when it came to her. Couldn’t be detached. He’d wanted to pound Dannon into dust for putting his hands on her.

She wouldn’t have appreciated that. She’d fight her own battles, she’d say. He’d learned this week that she’d been doing just that since she was barely out of the cradle. Lauren Duval hadn’t glossed over the details of Clare’s past. He couldn’t stand that Clare had been so hurt. Her pain felt like his own.

Jake rubbed a hand down his face. She wasn’t as tough as she pretended to be. She showed the world a hard shell to keep from exposing what lay beneath, an abandoned little girl who didn’t believe anyone could want her, and who trusted no one.

He didn’t know what he was going to do about that. For either of them. Last night, making love with her, he’d felt complete for the first time in over three years.

He leaned closer and kissed Clare, softly. She mumbled something, but didn’t stir. He could wake her. A few kisses. A few caresses and the haze of sleep clouding her eyes would become a haze of passion, but he didn’t have the heart to disturb what looked like a sound sleep. He had a feeling she wouldn’t be doing much sleeping in the days ahead as the search for Beth intensified.

After the day he’d had in the woods, he needed another shower. He’d hoped to take it with her. Looked like he’d be showering alone. He winced. Make that a cold shower.

He tucked the sheet around the two people he loved most in this world, then went to take that shower.

Chapter Twenty One
 

The autopsy on the skeletonized remains of Sara McCowan was set for nine a.m. There was no longer any doubt that the remains were Sara. Jake had received confirmation from the odontologist who’d examined Sara’s dental records.

Clare glanced at her watch. It was a little before eight. While she cleared the breakfast dishes, Jake had gone upstairs with Sammie to get her dressed to go to the Norths. Laura North had called a short while ago with the good news that her mother had been wrong about her father’s condition. The man had been suffering from a case of indigestion and had not had a heart attack. Laura was back at home.

Jake and Sammie had been upstairs for some time. Another few minutes went by. What could be keeping them? Clare propped the crutch under her arm and mounted the stairs slowly to find out.

She reached the upstairs hall and heard Jake. “Okay, honey,” he said to Sammie. “You have to decide what you want to wear today.”

There were a few thuds, which Clare thought was Sammie yanking open dresser drawers.

“This!” Sammie called out.

“Are you sure?” Jake asked.

Clare couldn’t see what Sammie had chosen, but she heard the doubt in Jake’s voice and smiled.

“I’m sure, Uncle Jake.”

“Okay.”

Clare suppressed a laugh as she turned away and made her way back to the stairs. She recalled Jake saying that most of the time he felt in over his head raising Sammie. At breakfast a few minutes ago, Sammie had said something about wanting her hair up for the parade next week. Jake had stammered his agreement. Clare didn’t think he was ready for that challenge. Maybe, she could lend a hand in getting Sammie ready for the event? If she was still staying with them next week . . .

Of course, she didn’t expect to be. By then she hoped to be reunited with Beth, and she and Jake would be out of each other’s lives.

Clare came to a stop on the stairs. Her breath caught. She let it out slowly, facing what she hadn’t wanted to the other night in Jake’s bed, facing that she was back where she had been three years earlier.

It had been so hard not to think about Jake in the last three years. To lock away the memories. Now, in a few days, and one glorious night, she’d come full circle. She touched her lips, imagining she could still feel his kiss.

Jake believed in happily ever after. Clare’s heart clutched with a sudden yearning to have that with him. She felt a chill on the back of her neck, and the hair there rose as if her mother now stood behind her . . .

Clare shuddered and closed her eyes. There could be no happily ever after with Jake for Jolene’s daughter.

If not for the search for Beth, she and Jake may have passed the rest of their lives without seeing each other again. That was the reality of their situation.

In three years, he hadn’t called, hadn’t told her he’d rather be with her on any terms than not at all.

Nothing had changed between them.

The pain of that ripped through her, leaving her empty.

“Clare, why are you standing there?” Sammie asked.

Clare opened her eyes. Jake and Sammie had joined her on the stairs. Sammie was wearing a caterpillar costume and carrying a plastic pumpkin with the words “Happy Halloween” stenciled above the jack o’ lantern’s grin.

Jake reached around Sammie and seized Clare’s arm in a grip as tight as a vice. His face was taut with worry. “You okay?”

“Fine. I just want to get going.”

She tugged her arm. He held firm for an instant longer, then released her.

* * * * *

The autopsy was performed in Blane County by Coroner Tina Devoe. Jake was acquainted with the coroner. Tina Devoe was a six-foot-tall redhead. The heels she wore brought her eye-to-eye with Jake. Devoe introduced her assistant, Anthony, then Anthony went to a CD player on one of the tray tables by the wall and pushed a button. Classical piano played softly through the speakers. Clare and Jake took up positions a short distance from the autopsy table.

Clare had attended many autopsies. In this case, it was likely she could have foregone attending. They had Sara’s murderer in custody. There really wasn’t anything they needed to learn to help them identify her killer.

For Clare, though, it wasn’t what she hoped to gain that had her standing by while Devoe examined what was left of Sara McCowan. For Clare, it was what she felt she needed to give. She believed that Sara’s killer had also abducted Beth. Sara and Beth had become linked for her and Clare needed to stand vigil for Sara, to lend her presence now in the only way she ever would be able to.

Anthony went to the X-ray viewer on the wall opposite the autopsy table and inserted a film. He flicked on the light switch then remained by the viewer. Devoe regarded the film as she studied the bones on the table. With her foot, she started a Dictaphone to record her findings, pausing only to ask Anthony to remove one X-ray and insert another.

After some time passed, Jake said to Devoe. “Cause of death, Tina?”

Devoe tapped on the Dictaphone, stopping it. “Hard to say. There isn’t one definitive cause.”

“Can you explain?” Jake said.

Devoe nodded. “Given the photos you showed me of this young woman before her abduction, and then the ones taken by the killer showing her emaciated condition when he put her in the ground, my best guess is that she died of starvation, and not by any one specific wound or trauma.

“See here.” Devoe’s gloved fingers touched on several bones. “The condition of the bones tells us a lot. It’s hard to stab someone without hitting a bone. Worse with a bullet. I’m looking at bone fractures here. According to the X-rays, they’re all over. None, though, resulted from a knife or a bullet so we can safely say she wasn’t stabbed or shot to death.

“I’m awaiting medical records for Sara McCowan that would tell us if she’d broken any bones during childhood or later, so I can eliminate those,” Devoe said. “But what I’m seeing here look like deliberate breaks. Blunt force trauma is extensive. Some of the bones in the little fingers are fragmented. This young woman’s limbs are a mess. The breaks, though, appear controlled. Like here in the tibia and fibula.” Devoe’s hand went to the lower leg. “Some of the fractures are minute, and in the same bone. None of them, though, in any part of the body, were traumatic enough to be fatal. Look at the skull where a blow could be fatal. No fractures. This killer knew what to break and to what degree to maximize pain and I’d say, to prevent death. This guy did his research.”