“Does she dance?”
Dave looked troubled. “I would recommend that you stay away from it. Leo was trying to teach her.”
Dave pointed out the restaurant. “They were two days away from being engaged, James. She’s still dealing with a lot of big issues. I’m not saying don’t pursue it, but I would move cautiously if I were you.”
Engaged.
Lace hadn’t told him that.
James slid out of the booth as the ladies came to join them, allowed Rae to slip back into her seat. She was sitting beside him in the booth.
It had been a laughter-filled last thirty minutes. Rae was still riding high with energy, her team having won the competition, and Dave was in usual form tonight, keeping them laughing at his stories. James was finding it hard to join in. He kept considering the implications of what Dave had said.
Engaged.
There was a lot of pain to process when you lost someone you loved. It may have been almost two years, but when he looked at Rae, he knew she had a long way to go before she had processed all the grief. The implications of how her life had changed—the work pressure, the added weight of responsibility, were still fundamentally affecting her life.
How well he could remember the first time he met her, how deep the grief had been in her eyes. Now, after weeks
around her, he was catching glimpses of Rae without that pain; moments when the glimmer of laughter would reach her eyes, moments when her smile would cause her eyes to twinkle. As a friend, he wanted to see that healing continue. He wanted to help in any way he could. As a man, he wanted her to be able to move on from the past.
He liked her.
It was a pretty profound emotion, because he wanted it to be more than a casual friendship.
He knew the reality. He was returning to Africa in six weeks. He had an obligation and commitment there to finish what he had begun, and the need was there, but the part of him that looked at the cost of that commitment was chalking up Rae as one of the steeper costs he was going to be paying.
Before he went back to Africa, he would like to see the smile in her eyes there all the time.
He wouldn’t mind spending more time with her before he went back overseas, simply because he enjoyed listening to her and being with her. But he no longer could treat her past as a casual fact. It was big and powerful, and to be a friend he had to at least appreciate what that past meant to her. Until tonight, he really hadn’t understood.
It made the idea of asking her out take on a whole new implication.
She hadn’t been on a date since Leo passed away. He ought to have at least realized that before he popped off a casual question. No wonder his suggestion of going into town to get ice cream had startled her.
She hadn’t been prepared to hear such a casual offer.
He would know better in the future.
He smiled as he listened to Rae debate Dave over the merits of the latest tax cap proposal for the county, Lace in
terrupting occasionally to add her concerns. The three of them had a passion for politics and legislation that made him wonder why none of them had ever gone into politics. The debate came down to point of interpretation and all three of them looked at him.
He grinned as he picked up his soda. “Sorry, I can’t even give an opinion.”
“We’ve got to stop doing local politics,” Lace apologized, pushing her plate to the side.
“Who wants the last two pieces of pizza?” Between the four of them, a large Canadian bacon pizza had nearly disappeared.
“Rae,” he and Dave said at the same time.
Rae rolled her eyes. “I don’t need to gain that much.”
“A bird has been eating more than you have. Take it for lunch tomorrow,” Dave insisted.
Rae conceded because she was outvoted.
James leaned back in the bench and watched Rae, a smile on his face because she was beside him and because occasionally she would turn to ask him a question in a low voice so the other two wouldn’t hear and her eyes would be sparkling. She had chosen him, since Dave and Lace were skirting around actually dating each other, to be the one she would turn to when she needed a partner. She sent him to get her soda, asked him to find the hot pepper shaker for her. Little things that made him smile. She’d returned the favor by announcing Dave was buying the pizza. Dave had groaned and protested and she’d just looked at him, prompting laughter around the table when Dave didn’t say another word.
Rae was happy tonight and he didn’t want the night to end.
She needed more breaks like this. He’d been thinking about it as they sat and talked tonight. He had one option up his sleeve, something he thought might get a yes from
her even though everything he had seen so far said she was comfortable in the group of friends, but not beyond that group. Puppies were a hard date to turn down.
“Have a nice night?”
His mom was still up, seated in the recliner in the family room, knitting, the late show just finishing, credits scrolling by on the screen. It was like walking back in time. So many times during his high school and college days he had come home and found her in just that chair, reading a book, watching a late show, occasionally sleeping. It was his dad’s chair.
James leaned against the doorpost, tucked his hands in his pockets, smiled. “Real good, Mom.”
For all the pain and trouble the bug he had picked up had caused, the fact that it gave him a few weeks back with family almost made it worthwhile. He was storing up memories of his mom and his sister and her family. He was going to miss them all.
“I’m glad.” She set down the sweater she was making, then touched the remote to shut off the television. “I do love Cary Grant. He made such good movies.”
His dog leveraged himself to his feet, came over to greet him. “Hi, boy.” James stroked the dog’s coat and he lazily leaned against James’s jeans, loving the attention.
His mom picked up the bowl of orange peels beside the chair and the empty glass off the table. “Your dad and I watched that movie on our honeymoon.” She touched the light switch. “There were a couple phone calls for you tonight. Jim Marshall called from Germany and Kevin called, said to tell you Monday was good on his schedule. I left the notes on the kitchen table.”
“I bet Jim’s got a new baby to announce. Heather was due
about now,” James remarked walking back to the kitchen to get the message.
“It would be his second?”
“Third. He’s got a boy and girl.” He confirmed the number was the one he remembered. “I’ve got a couple guys coming over tomorrow to help me rehang the garage door so it won’t stick anymore. I’ll be over at the kennels after that. Did your dog Margo have her puppies yet?”
“Not yet, but the vet says she’s due anytime. Bobby said he would be sure to check on her tonight when he makes his rounds.”
“I’ve got someone I think I’ll invite over to see them,” James said casually.
His mom smiled, that smile she used to get when he said he was bringing a girl home with him to study.
“I’m leaving in six weeks, Mom.”
His mom nodded, but her smile only got wider. “Six weeks is a long time. Rae will like the puppies. Lock up before you turn in?”
James knew he had said nothing about Rae recently, he’d seen her only as part of the group. He spent his time with Dave or Kevin or over at Patricia’s. Trust his mom to figure out his interest before he did….
“I’ll lock up.”
“It’s good to have you back, James,” Kevin said, handing him the second cup of coffee he was carrying.
It was the crack of dawn, dew was still on the cars and trucks, and they were looking at what was essentially a hardened pad of concrete. Not a piece of lumber had been laid for this house that was slated to be ready for the electrician and plumber in three weeks.
“Remember how to be a carpenter?”
James laughed. “I’ve forgotten more than you ever learned,” he replied, drinking the coffee and looking over the blueprints spread out before them across two sawhorses. He was eager, impatient to get to work; he had always loved these initial few days, framing in a house and making it appear from nothing.
His devotions that morning had landed on Psalm 127.
Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain.
It was just like God to note the arrival of this day with the same expectation James felt.
It was nice to know this morning he was going to be helping God build a home.
“The rest of the crew should be arriving anytime. Find the chalk and let’s get this house underway,” Kevin said. “I’ve missed this, James. I’ve been stuck behind a desk too much the last couple of years.”
“Have you sold this one yet?”
“A real nice couple from Georgia, moving with his job. They’ve got one little girl, about six years old.”
The lumber for the frame had been delivered and rested on pallets on what would someday be a sodded backyard. James started hauling lumber. The first nail drove into the wood in two decisive blows of the hammer, making him smile and reach for the next nail.
He was back.
This was who he was.
A carpenter who made homes and clinics rise where there was only a dream.
It felt good. Really, really good.
God, thanks.
The prayer came from his heart. It was followed with another nail, pounded in with a smile. There
was a day coming in heaven when he was going to get the Master Craftsman in a workshop to show him the things He had made when He was a carpenter. There was something uniquely satisfying with sharing the profession Jesus had chosen for thirty years. Jesus could have been a farmer or a fisherman, or a shopkeeper. He had chosen to be a carpenter. James could understand why.
“J
ames, can you join us? We’re at Rae’s tonight,” Dave asked.
Ten hours on the job studding in the kitchen had left him dripping in sweat and physically tired, a good tired that came after accomplishing a good job, but still ready for some downtime. He had been headed for a shower and a ball game when the phone had rung. His mom was out tonight with Patricia and the kids.
“What time, Dave? I’ll be there.”
It was Rae. Any other offer he would have declined. Going to Rae’s put the request in a different league.
“Seven-thirty. Lace is coming out from the city.”
“I’ll be there.”
“Great. Come hungry. I’m doing ribs on the grill.”
James hung up the phone. Rae. He hadn’t seen her for eight days. He had checked the nursery Sunday morning to find he had just missed her. Eight days was too long.
Margo had four gorgeous puppies, but James had decided a phone call was not the way to extend the invitation. He
needed to do it in person, when he knew it was a favorable time and he would see her expression.
Tonight.
Ask Rae over for dinner and a trip to the kennel to see the puppies.
Add his mom to the picture. Dinner at his mom’s kitchen table. That should be low-key enough to get a yes. Nothing threatening. It would get him a few hours of her company, that was the objective.
He went to take a shower, his fatigue easing with the plans for the night.
After four days of construction work with Kevin, his body was complaining about the physical exertion, but so far it was the aches and pains he would expect from having been sidelined for so many weeks. It wasn’t the pain he had learned to dread, pain burning in his joints; it was the normal ache of muscles being used to do some heavy work.
He was relieved.
He had been more worried than he was willing to admit about how this first week of construction would go. He wasn’t out of danger of a physical surprise yet, but every day that went by put him all the more closer to being able to return to Africa. He prayed for that every morning when he got up, every evening when he went to bed.
Africa.
It was work he did well. It was work that saved lives.
He was enjoying the comforts of a hot shower, a good meal and a soft bed while he had them. They would soon be memories. He had learned to enjoy good things while they were there. It was a cost of the mission field. He had accepted the cost once before, and he would accept it again.
There was a world in need, and he had the skills to
meet it. To not go would be to deny the call God had placed on his heart.
Someday, there would be a payoff worth the sacrifice.
It was time to quit wishing for something else and enjoy what God had given now. Good friends. A wonderful lady. Ribs.
Dave was awesome with charcoal and a grill.
“Dave, did you need matches?” Rae shifted the casserole dish of scalloped potatoes to the top of the stove, careful to keep a firm grip on the hotpad. She had already burned her thumb once tonight.
“Got them, Rae. Were you able to find the long tongs?”
“Yes, but I need to wash them,” Rae called out to the deck. “I’ll have them for you in a minute.”
She blew a strand of hair back from her eyes. Company was coming and she was a wreck. Still in her skirt and blouse from work, rumpled, hot, running late.
“Would you quit fussing over the food and go take a shower? It’s just James and Lace,” Dave said, joining her in the kitchen.
Exactly, Rae thought. She preferred James to see her with a semblance of her act together.
Dave laughed and took the pot holders. “Go. I can manage the kitchen.”
She hugged him then deserted him, leaving him to try to put together the menu.
The shower was hot, the steam taking away the marks of the stressful day. It had been a day where she had been silently pleading by noon for God to send her some relief. The markets had been volatile, one of the computer feeds of data had gone down, and Janet had been called for jury duty.
Rae rapidly washed her hair.
God, we’ve talked about it so many times in the past six weeks. I’m glad You’re using James to help pull me out of the grief, but God, just between You and me, this is getting embarrassing. He’s a friend, he’s going back to Africa in six weeks, and I’m acting like I’ve got a crush on him! I’m not cut out to be acting like I’m twenty again. I’m not ready to emotionally deal with a guy and a relationship again. So would you please ease this emotion and use tonight to help me back off?
Oh, and God, if I get a chance to talk to Lace alone tonight, help me find the right words to say. She’s been quietly hoping for Dave’s interest for three years. Now that he’s asked, she needs the courage to say yes. I understand her fears, Dave has not exactly shown a desire to settle down in the past, but I’ve seen something different in him the past few weeks, and I want Lace to at least give him a chance. I think they were made for each other, Lord. They complement each other, and they’ve already got the commitment to each other as friends.
The silent prayer helped steady Rae’s nerves. Ten minutes later, standing in front of her closet biting her bottom lip, she had to make a decision. She wanted comfortable and Lace would argue she should go for knockout. Rae hated waffling about clothes. She had no idea what she should wear. She finally chose a black knit top and a pair of pressed jeans. She added her mother’s pearls. It was a compromise.
It took forever to get her hair to dry. When she finally clicked off the hair dryer, she could hear voices from downstairs. She glanced at the clock. Lace had made better time than she expected.
Rae hesitated, then reached over for the perfume bottle.
It was a night of friends over for a meal and a televised baseball game. She had to get over these nerves. She finally had to order herself to get downstairs and be the hostess.
James parked behind Lace’s car in the drive. As he walked up the drive to the town house, he could hear laughter coming from the deck at the back.
Rae had a beautiful home. He let himself in, having concluded they were all outside. It was a comfortable place, nice furniture, beautiful paintings, restful because it was lived in. Rae had her mom’s books—eight novels, prominently displayed in the living room. Her mail had been dropped in a basket on the kitchen bar, magazines tossed in a basket beside the couch.
There were books everywhere, on bookshelves in the living room, a stack on the hallway table to be returned to the library, a half-dozen more piled up on the floor at the end of the couch, most with a bookmark indicating where she had left off reading.
The first time he had seen her home, he had been impressed with how well it reflected her personality. It wasn’t coordinated as a decorator would do it, but it was visually restful and functionally useful.
Rae was a lady who liked pictures, most of the shelves and a few of the tables had framed snapshots. Her family. Dave and Lace. Leo.
Rae had a picture of Leo on the shelf beside her mom’s novels. It was a candid snapshot, obviously taken by either Lace or Dave, at the cabin where they had vacationed. Leo had been in the kitchen making waffles, Rae leaning against his back and reaching around to swipe a strawberry. The snapshot told James a lot. Leo had turned to say something to Rae, and the expression on his face as he looked at her had been unguarded. Leo had been in love with Rae. It was there in his face and his eyes.
He had been a good man.
Everything Dave and Lace said, everything Rae herself reflected, told him that.
The fact Rae had kept the snapshot, displayed it as she did, was a tribute to the fact the love had been returned.
The pictures of Rae with Leo, other pictures around, had given him a glimpse of a Rae he had not met, one who was relaxed, happy, not yet touched by grief.
Her smile was returning, but it was a slow process.
God, are You sure an invitation is the right thing to do? I’m back to waffling again.
James followed the sound of laughter to the deck just in time to see Dave duck the spray of the water hose Lace was holding. She had obviously been trying to help with the flaring flames licking the charcoal and threatening to burn the ribs, but she hadn’t been ready for the fact Rae had turned the valve on.
James bit back a laugh at the scene.
Lace meekly turned the hose over to a Dave who was now standing in wet shoes. “Sorry, David.”
Dave wiped the water off his forearm, gave a long-suffering sigh. “You know, the first time I could write it off as an accident, but the third time? I swear you just like to get me soaked, Lace.”
“Would some iced tea make it better?”
He tweaked a lock of her hair at the amusement in her voice. “Make it a soda with caffeine. I have a feeling I’m going to need it tonight.”
The wind shifted and James got a smell of the cooking ribs. A day working on a house made a man hungry. He stepped out onto the deck.
“Hi, James.” Rae walked onto the deck, pausing beside him.
She was beautiful tonight, her hair pulled back in a gold barrette, the length brushing her shoulders. The pearls were a sharp contrast to the black sweater. He didn’t see her wear jewelry very often. “Hi, Rae. Looks like I got here just in time.”
“Be glad you weren’t here a few minutes earlier, you would have probably gotten doused as well.”
She seemed a little uncertain around him, not meeting his glance. James wondered ruefully what was wrong. He wished she would relax around him like she did with Dave.
“James, can I get you a drink?” Lace asked.
Lace, as always, was dressed casually, yet looking like a fashion model. “A soft drink would be fine,” he replied, returning her smile.
“I made my special sauce I was telling you about. You are going to like these ribs.” James accepted the inevitable and went to join Dave.
James settled in with Dave, talking food, and looking around the yard, noting a few things that needed to be done. Rae didn’t have enough time in her life to keep a yard landscaped, he knew that, but there was evidence that in the past she had tried.
The trellis with the grapevines needed to have a few slats added to bear the weight of the full vines. And her rosebushes were in full bloom, though a couple needed to be trimmed back.
He missed not having a house and yard to work on. Years before, when the business with Kevin had finally begun to turn a modest profit, he had bought an older two-story home near where Patricia currently lived and used his free time to fix it up. He had enjoyed the work, both inside and
out in the yard. When he had sold the home the summer he went to Africa, it had been like parting with an old friend. He had made good money on the investment, but it had been a sacrifice, selling the place.
He was a man who liked having a home that showed the benefits of his labor. For six years on the mission field, he had accepted living in temporary housing, often staying with members of the local church, their hospitality appreciated and generous, but it was not the same as having a permanent home.
Dave had a restless, nomadic streak. James was different. He looked forward to the day the clinics were built and the job was done, coming back to the States to settle in one place, buy a house and use his labor to make it a nice home.
Lace returned with the soda he had requested.
Dave flipped the ribs over, added more barbecue sauce.
Ten minutes later, they settled around the table for dinner. Rae and Lace sat across from Dave and James.
Rae was quiet, but her smiled was genuine, her laughter making her eyes twinkle. Although she was still avoiding catching his glance, he had a long evening to work on getting her attention.
Rae passed him the bread and he finally caught her eye. He smiled and it was tentative, but he got a smile back from her.
James relaxed.
Lace was back to flirting with Dave.
It was a wonderful meal. The food was delicious, and the company enjoyable. By dessert, the conversation had turned to Rae’s book.
Rae didn’t like being the center of attention; she was the one who preferred to listen. James found her slight blush tugging his protective nature.
He was pleased to hear that she had been able to get an average six hours of writing time in each week since the vacation, and was now working on chapter twenty-four. When she talked about the book, she came alive in a way that made her face light up. He loved to see that expression.
They eventually moved to the living room and the baseball game, Lace accepting a small gesture from Dave to join him on the couch. Rae settled into a chair, and James sat across from her, watching her as much as he did the game.
Often, he would see her eyes drift from the game to the pictures on the mantel. She looked less hurt, but still sad.
It was not the time to ask her. He could have arranged a chance to ask her, but he didn’t try. Tonight was not the right time.
There was a day coming soon that would be the right time. She needed to know a future did exist beyond what she presently had; she needed to know the sadness could be left behind and she could look at options beyond just her career. He had heard the weariness in her voice as she talked about how work was going, her progress in looking for a business partner.
She wasn’t going to leave the sadness behind without someone taking the step to ask her on a date. He cared too much about her to leave for Africa without having helped her open that door.
He would be opening the door that someone else would eventually walk through.
He wanted her to still be single in five years, when he figured he would be coming back to the States for good. It wasn’t fair to her. She wanted children. He had only to look
at her at church around the children to see the obvious. It wasn’t fair to rob her of a dream just because he would prefer to have her wait for him.
The sixth day working on the house was a physically challenging day. It was a hot, eighty degrees by 10:00 a.m., the sun and heat and humidity making them sweat and go through gallons of ice water. James paused on the bandsaw, having cut the last lumber they would need to finish framing in the master bedroom and master bath. Wearily, he wiped the sweat from his face with the towel he had slipped in his back pocket.