God Don’t Like Ugly (33 page)

I
spent another hour with everybody after they had eaten Thanksgiving dinner. I thanked God when they finally started to leave. Pee Wee and Caleb left first to drive Judge Lawson home.

“With so many people not havin’ to work day after Thanksgivin’ we’ll be busy, so we got to get in the bed,” Pee Wee explained. “I’ll stop by later in the evenin’ after work tomorrow, Annette.”

“Sister Goode, that sure enough was a world-beatin’ meal,” Caleb said, grinning and smacking his lips. Muh’Dear walked them to the door and patted both backs as they went out the door, with Pee Wee pushing a snoozing Judge Lawson’s wheelchair.

“I guess I better get my old bones on home and rest ’em. Tomorrow is a busy day for me, too.” Scary Mary winked at me. I helped her put on her black woolen coat and walked her to the door. There was a cab waiting in front of the house for her.

It was Muh’Dear’s idea for me to get to bed. “Suddenly you look like you got the weight of the world on your shoulders. Did Scary Mary say somethin’ up there to upset you? Was she braggin’ about how Florence doin’ so well with a man and kids and you ain’t? Did she try to borrow money from you?”

“No, Ma’am. I’m just tired, that’s all. ’Night, Muh’Dear.”

How I did it I don’t know. I climbed into my bed and slept like a baby. I guess I was just that tired. When I woke up the next morning, I tried to make myself believe I had dreamed my conversation with Scary Mary about Rhoda and the pregnant white girl. I had not dreamed it. I knew that Rhoda had killed again, but I had to hear it from her.

My mind was a ball of confusion, and I stayed in my room for as long as I could. By the time I got downstairs to the living room, around nine, Mr. King had arrived. Like Pee Wee, time had been fairly good to him. He was now more handsome than ever. The deep lines around his sparkling eyes gave him a distinguished look, not a tired, used-up look like Scary Mary’s lines or Muh’Dear’s. His hair was gray, but thick and healthy-looking.

He gave me a big hug and led me to the couch, where I sat down next to him. “Just look at you. I told your mama, you can work for me anytime you want to. We all one big happy family,” he hollered, winking at Muh’Dear. “As attractive and sophisticated as you is, you’ll be a good addition to the Buttercup!” Mr. King exclaimed.

Muh’Dear nodded and smiled harder than ever before.

Around ten, Scary Mary returned hugging a bag of beers, straining like the bag weighed more than she did.

The chatter became one long rambling mess. In a way I was glad. They were doing so much talking, I could not have gotten a word in edgewise even if I had wanted to. There was too much on my mind for me to think clearly, let alone speak clearly. I almost jumped out of my skin when Rhoda’s name came up.

“Oh she called early this mornin’. She said to tell you she’ll be here sometime tomorrow. She can’t wait to see you,” Muh’Dear told me.

“I hope she bring me somethin’ like Pee Wee and Florence done. I treasure my fruit basket from Vietnam and my lamp from Toledo,” Scary Mary whined. “Annette, I guess you ain’t thought about no souvenirs before you left Erie, huh?”

“I’m sorry. I was in such a hurry to get packed and out of that city, I didn’t think about bringing anybody any souvenirs,” I explained.

Mr. King had also brought a big bag of beer with him, and everybody was drinking. I managed to eat a light breakfast and watch a little television on a small set Muh’Dear had installed on the kitchen counter, but I could not stop thinking about Rhoda. I didn’t know how I was going to approach her about the white girl. But for my own sanity and peace of mind, I had to confront her. If what I believed was true, and if for some strange reason Rhoda got caught, she might break down and confess the Boatwright murder, which would surely include my involvement. I felt sick. I desperately wanted to see her to find out for sure. I prayed that she would tell me and convince me that April had died accidentally.

Scary Mary went with Muh’Dear and Mr. King to his restaurant for dinner. They had all tried to talk me into going with them, but there was way too much on my mind. Once I was totally alone in the house I felt a strange sense of sadness. The last thing I wanted to do was cause a big stink with my best girlfriend. The timing was so wrong. This was supposed to be a time for rejoicing and reunions.

I was thankful to find a few leftover beers in the refrigerator. I drank every one in sight. The mild buzz made it easy for me to go to my room and take a nap. With so much on my mind, it didn’t bother me at all being in the very room where I had cried so many tears.

I don’t know exactly what time Rhoda blew into town the next day. She came over to our house around 6
P.M
. loaded down with gifts. She gave Muh’Dear and Scary Mary handmade earrings she had picked up in Jamaica, and she gave Mr. King and Caleb straw hats. She gave Pee Wee a Bob Marley T-shirt and me a big pan of her homemade candy.

“You look beautiful,” she told me. She hugged me so hard, my chest hurt.

“Thanks for the candy,” I rasped. I lifted the foil to show it off to everybody, then I set the pan on the coffee table without offering any or even biting a plug off of it myself. Rhoda followed me to the sofa, chattering away about her great life in Florida. She had everybody spellbound. Muh’Dear was especially mesmerized listening to Rhoda go on and on about her frequent trips to the mystical Bahamas. Muh’Dear could have used part of Mr. Boatwright’s insurance to enjoy a trip to the Bahamas long before now. But every time I had mentioned her doing just that, she gave me some vague story about how she was waiting on the “right time” to go. While everybody else in the room had aged to some degree, Rhoda had not. She looked the way she had looked at eighteen. In fact, she looked even younger. There was a noticeable glow about her face. It wasn’t long before I found out why. She was pregnant again.

“Lord, I hope my girl slow down someday and get her a husband and some kids,” Muh’Dear lamented. “Like Rhoda done. And poor, blind Florence ’bout to marry husband number two…”

“Uh—Rhoda. Let’s go to my room so we can talk.” I wasn’t ready to confront her. I had planned to drink a few beers first. But I couldn’t stand to sit any longer the way the conversation was going.

“Oh let the girl alone. I want to hear more about the Bahamas,” Muh’Dear insisted, dismissing me with her hand. I had to endure three more hours of nonstop chatter, mostly praising Rhoda. Just when I thought I was going to scream, everybody but Rhoda decided it was time to go home. It was past midnight.

“Me, I better get my tail on to bed or I won’t be good for nothin’ in the mornin’,” Muh’Dear admitted. She had to work the next day.

Finally, it was just me and Rhoda. I waited until I heard Muh’Dear’s bedroom door shut before I looked at Rhoda. She was on the couch with her legs crossed. The rest of her body was sprawled across the arm of the couch. Anybody who didn’t know any better would think that Rhoda lived in the house. She just seemed to dominate every place she went. I was standing on weak legs, feeling like shit. I was so uncomfortable and anxious it was hard for me to remain still.

“OK. What’s wrong with you?” she started.

“What do you mean?” Now I was folding and unfolding my arms and shifting my weight from one foot to the other.

“I know you better than anybody in the whole wide world. Even your mama don’t know you like I know you. You’ve been actin’ funny ever since I walked in that door.” She uncrossed her legs and gave me a hard look before continuing. “Did Pee Wee offend you?”

“No,” I said quietly. I moved over to the sofa and sat as close to Rhoda as I dared. Her eyes followed every move I made. “Uh…why didn’t you tell me that April died in your house?”

She gave me a surprised look, then blinked hard a few times before responding. “What difference does it make to you where she died?”

“It makes a big difference to me. Like you just said, you know me better than anybody else in the world; I think I can say the same thing about you. You didn’t even mention that part of the story. I had to hear it from Scary Mary.”

“I didn’t mention it because I didn’t think it was important.” Rhoda waved her arms dramatically and leaned back as if to see my face better. I refused to take my eyes off her.

“Why was she taking a bath in your house? Did you talk her into drinking a bottle of whiskey like you did me?”

“She wanted the baby, I told you,” Rhoda reminded me, blinking hard again. “She took baths at my house all the time.”

“Her death was real convenient for you and all that mess going on between the girl and your brother, huh?”

Rhoda sucked in her breath and shrugged. She opened her mouth but didn’t speak. Then she just shrugged again and gave me a slow nod.

“I know you did it, so go on and admit it.”

The room was deathly silent for a moment. “I had to,” she whispered, with a pleading look in her eyes. “What else could I do?”

“I knew it! I knew it!” I hissed, shaking my head, staring at her as hard as she was staring at me.

“Shhhhh! You want your mama to hear?” Rhoda slid over so close to me our knees touched. She seemed surprised and hurt when I moved away from her.

“I don’t believe it. I don’t believe you did this
again!
”

“Then don’t believe it,” she snapped. She stood up and stretched long and hard, rolling her eyes making sure I knew that I had annoyed her. “I didn’t come here to be accused—”

“Accused? You just admitted it.” I jumped up, my face close to hers.

She glanced at her watch, then told me, “It’s late and I’m tired. This is not the time to be discussin’…this subject. We’ll finish this conversation in the mornin’ after you’ve had time to sleep on it.”

“No. We are going to finish this conversation right here and now.”

“What more is there to say? I did it, I said I did it, you know I did it. Now that’s that. Nobody but you and I have to know just like…with Buttwright. We’ve put him behind us, let’s do the same with April.” She squeezed my shoulder for a moment, then started buttoning her sweater. “After all…I was provoked.”

“Let’s go talk in my room,” I said, grabbing her arm. She looked down at my thick hand holding on to her thin arm with an expression on her face that normally would have frightened me. But I was no longer afraid of her. Even though it was fairly late, I could hear people outside on the street laughing and talking and noisy cars whizzing by. My mood was black and anxious. I knew ahead of time that by the end of this conversation, my life would be altered again.

“All right. Let’s get this over with so I can go home and get some sleep.” Rhoda followed me to my room in silence.

Once we entered my room, she made herself comfortable on my bed. I stood by the front window rehearsing what I wanted to say to her in my mind.

“All right,” she announced. “Let’s get this over with.” She crossed her legs and started moving her foot, making circles in the air.

“Why did you kill that girl, Rhoda?”

“What do you mean? You of all people know why I had to do it.”

“Just like Mr. Boatwright, huh?”

“You could say that,” she agreed.

“You know if you ever get caught, you’ll probably spend the rest of your life in prison. Was it worth all that? I know you’re lucky and you’re intelligent. But sooner or later your luck and intelligence are not going to be enough, Rhoda.”

“I’ll worry about that when it happens,” she said in a shaky voice. She then uncrossed her legs and started tapping her toe on the floor impatiently.

“You’ve killed two people, and you’re not worried?” I asked incredulously.

“Four,” she said quickly, quietly, looking toward the door.

A gasp caught in my throat, and my head dropped forward and low.

“What did you say?” I heard myself ask.

“You heard me. I said ‘four.’” Her voice sounded like an echo.

“Who else?” I asked, looking deep into her eyes, searching for something. I just didn’t know what.

“Remember the last time my daddy put the Ford in the body shop to have another dent removed?”

“You told me you knocked over a mailbox,” I said guardedly. I had to turn away. I could not face her and absorb her confession at the same time. I spoke with my eyes looking at the floor. “Go on.”

“Remember that cop that killed my brother?

“The one they said…died in a hit-and-run…accident.” Now I was looking at the side of her face. Like me, her whole body was shaking. “Who was the other one?” I asked, almost choking on my words.

“Remember when Granny Goose fell down the steps and broke her neck? I…I…” Rhoda’s eyes were on the floor.

“Your own grandmother?” I spoke, looking toward the wall.

“You don’t know what a burden she was and how much she was sufferin’. I loved her, but she didn’t know me from Moses anymore. I did it for her.”

“No!” I whirled around to face her. There was the strangest expression on her face. Her eyes were stretched open wide, and her lips were pressed together in a hard, thin line. Her bright red lipstick gave her a devilish appearance. Her jaw was twitching. “Your own grandmother? I can’t believe my ears—”

We stood there for the longest moment just looking in one another’s eyes.

“Do you know I still have nightmares and I’m still afraid somebody will find out you smothered Mr. Boatwright and that I knew it. Now all this…I…I…don’t…” I paused, unable to go on for a moment. I had to fight hard to prevent myself from having a panic attack. “Rhoda,” I said firmly. I sucked in my breath and stood up straight. “Rhoda, how can I go on being friends with you now?” My words had a chilling effect on me. These were words I never dreamed I would hear myself saying. But never in my wildest imagination would I have expected to hear what Rhoda had just told me. At first I wanted to call her a liar. I wanted to accuse her of trying to get my goat. But I had known her too long, and I knew her well enough to know that she was not one to make such claims lightly. She stood up, not taking her eyes off me.

“Do you realize what you’re sayin’, Annette? Is this the way you want to end our relationship after all these years?”