Glam Metal (44 page)

She looked up as he came in. He went over to the refrigerator and took out a bottle of water. Twisted the cap and took a long drink from it.

“I’m not hungry, I had something earlier.” He said abruptly and walked over to the table. Sam put down the knife and washed her hands. She found it difficult to get the smell off her hands.

“You could have phoned.” She said angrily. He swore under his breath. Sam said something. Jay stood up and shouted.

“Fuck it Sam. Drop it OK!” She was stunned. He never swore at her before. In fact she never heard him swear when she was with him. It was like it wasn’t him.

“How dare you!” She went to walk past him but he grabbed her arm and swinging her round, he pulled her into his arms. He kissed her hard on the mouth. A flash of what had happened that night in her apartment with Dan caused her to scream.

Wrapping his arms around her he said softly.

“Darlin…I’m sorry babe…Sam.” Tears flowed freely down her face as he held her close. He kissed her head. “Forgive me Babe.” He held her trembling body close to him. She could hear his heart beating. A sound she always loved to listen to after they made love.

As he wiped away her tears with his thumb; Jay said softly.

“Oh Sam, I am a stupid asshole.” She looked up into his eyes. He bent his head and kissed her. “Babe, I love you so much.” He would never hurt her. He would never raise his hand to her. The coke he had taken earlier had made him so damn irritated.“Sam, I’m going through some things right now that are…well quite insane.” He kissed her mouth again, tasting her lipstick. “Let me make it up to you.” She nodded. He told her he was going to have a shower and he would make them something light to eat.

When he was upstairs, she rang Lisa.

“Lisa, hi, it’s me.” There was a pause. Then her cheerful voice said:

“Sam, how nice, how are you?”  Sam asked her if she noticed anything different about Nick, if he was acting strangely. “No more than usual, Sam, they’re rockers, life is strange for them.” Sam didn’t tell her friend what had just happened, because she just didn’t understand it herself.

“Let’s do lunch tomorrow?” Sam said. Lisa agreed and the line went dead.

Half an hour later, Sam was sitting outside eating with Jay. He was completely different from the guy that had come home so moody.

“I have to go down to the studio tomorrow.” He was saying. “Want to go sailing in the afternoon?”  He was pouring some wine for her. She loved sailing with him. They didn’t seem to do much of it lately.

“What’s happening at the studio?” She asked as he handed her the glass of wine. She took a sip. It was a very light crisp Californian white. She loved it.

“Well, I’m flirting with doing a solo album, and I’m going down to the studio to talk to them and see what we come up with.” She knew how much his music meant to him. And how much the friendship with the guys from the band meant also. There was a little tension building up between them since the last tour they did. This explained why he was so distant and fiery. She touched him gently. He covered her slender hand with his.

“Jay, why didn’t you tell me before?” She asked softly. “Why didn’t you trust me with this?” He picked up his glass of water, took a sip and put the half full glass back on the table.

“Sam, financially the band is in a bit of trouble.” She looked at him, her mouth open. “Nick and I put our own money in to produce the last album. Glam Metal is on the brink of calling it a day.” He looked down at the half eaten steak on the plate. “We made lots of money out of this and we know that eighties metal is coming back in a big way but we have tried everything to promote this album.” She looked at him. Something in his eyes told her he was trying to protect her from the reality of what was really going on.

“Jay, are you doing coke again?” She blurted out. He pulled away his hand and threw his napkin on the table.

“Babe, I am not doing coke. I’ve had a few beers and that’s it.” He pushed back his chair and walked off.

Sam got up and cleared away the plates. She went into the kitchen, left them on the sink and went up to soak in the tub.

When she came into the bedroom, there was no sign of Jay anywhere. She put on a white satin nightie and went back out into the hall. Sam could hear the strains of Jay strumming his guitar down in his den. She went back into the bedroom and went to bed.

When Sam awoke, she looked at the clock. It was four am and she was alone. She got up and went downstairs. She opened the door to Jay’s den; he was asleep on the sofa. She went over to him and taking the throw from the chair; she put it over him and tiptoed out of the room. She gently closed the door behind her. A sigh escaped her. This was the first time since they had been together, that he had slept in a different room from her. She felt a tear escape as she went back upstairs to the empty bed, which she shared with Jay.

Sam felt sick at the thought of what she had accused him of. No wonder, he was angry with her. Tomorrow, she would apologize and try to make it up to him.

Her clock went off at seven. She got up, showered and went down to the kitchen, she would make him breakfast before he went to the studio. It was the least that she could do.

Gently opening the door, she popped her head around it. But the den was empty. Jay wasn’t there. Sam went out onto the verandah; perhaps he was having a swim.

He wasn’t there either. Puzzled she went back inside. Put the cup on the counter and rang his phone. She would meet him for lunch. She needed to clear the air.

Sam dialed his number but there was no answer. She guessed he was still angry with her. He must have gotten up early and left for the studio. What a cow she had been to him. She wouldn’t blame him for not answering his phone.

The gallery was busy and she had hardly any time to think. For that she was thankful. Sam had sold two more paintings and she had just gotten off the phone with Damon. He was thrilled and said that he would be back over in LA in a few weeks.

It would be good to see him again, she liked Damon and they seemed to have put their differences behind them. Sam’s phone rang.

“Sam, I can’t make it to lunch dear.” Lisa sounded a little breathless. “We’ll do it another day, OK.” Sam agreed and the line went dead. She hardly saw Lisa anymore. She may as well still be living in London.

She decided she would go to the deli around the corner and grab a sandwich and a juice. Sam picked up her bag and put on her glasses. She walked slowly, looking in the windows of the shops. She missed London terribly. Perhaps she should return for a visit. Looking in the window of a jewelers shop, her eyes rested on a selection of diamond rings. They were so beautiful, Sam looked at her finger and it was bare. Even though she was living with Jay, he still hadn’t given her an engagement ring. And now, after what she said to him last night, he wouldn’t be in any hurry to get her one either. She gave a last longing look at the rings and moved away from the window.

She ate her sandwich and drank the cranberry juice and went back to the gallery. She had lots of paperwork to catch up with.

Sam got through most of the paperwork. She looked at her watch, it was almost five. She hadn’t heard from Jay all day. She stretched and got up and went over to the coffee machine. One of the things she loved about LA, was the coffee, it was always good. Sam smiled as she took the cup back to her desk. The phone rang. Immediately she answered it.

“Hey,” she said. Thinking it was Jay but it wasn’t. It was Josh Manteca.

“Hello Samantha. How are you?” Jay’s words of warning brought up her guard. He had told her that now; she was part of the glitterati, in her own right. The press would hound her and she needed to be careful what she said to them.

“I’m very well. What can I do for you Mr. Manteca?” Her tone was curt and formal. There was a pause.

“I just thought you’d like to go for a coffee and discuss the spread in the paper for your gallery.” She thought for a moment. Then she replied.

“I don’t think so, Mr. Manteca.”

“Please call me Josh.” His tone was full of amusement. She wondered if he could tell she was smiling.

“Such informality isn’t necessary; I will get back to you when I decide if I want a spread.” She was grinning now. Sam hung up.

Sam closed down her computer and grabbed her bag. She would cook a special dinner for Jay and try to make it up to him.

She fought her way home on the busy freeway. Her thoughts were on her daughter and Jay. Sam would make the evening very special. She would cook his favourite meal, turn on the hot tub and make love to him all night.

A feeling of butterflies flying around in her stomach enveloped her at the thoughts of being in his arms.

As she pulled in to the driveway, she didn’t see his car. Perhaps he had parked it in the garage with the Mercedes.

Sam went inside and called his name. There was silence, except for the sound of Juanita upstairs in the nursery. Sam smiled to herself and put her bag and briefcase in the cupboard.

She went into the lounge and poured herself a glass of wine. She never used to drink much in London but she found that here in California, she was drinking much more than usual. Sam looked at the clock on the mantle over the fire. It was gone seven. She hadn’t heard from Jay since yesterday. Sam knew she was in the wrong and she was well prepared to admit that. Yes, it was a hurtful thing she said. But it was understandable given his mood swings of late. And his past history with coke addiction.

Juanita came down to the lounge and told Sam; Jaime had had her bath and was now asleep. Sam smiled and told her she would see her later.

“Enjoy your evening Juanita.” Sam went into the kitchen and began to raid the fridge to make Jay’s dinner; chicken fajitas.

She thought she heard a car pull up outside and prayed it was Jay. She hated this. She hated their arguing over something so ridiculous. Jay was an adult and he knew very well, what would happen if he tried coke again. She was his girlfriend not his mother.

Sam heard the door of the den bang. She went out into the hall and called his name. He didn’t answer. She wondered if perhaps she should go to the den but decided that if he wanted to talk to her, he would have answered her when she called out.

Sam went back into the kitchen. She hoped the smell would lure him in. Ten minutes later she was fixing some salad in a bowl when Jay walked in to the room and went over to the refrigerator. He took out a bottle of water and drank from it.

Sam took the plates over to the table. She wondered if she should say anything but he broke the silence for her.

“Smells great, Sam.” She smiled at him. She so desperately wanted to put her arms around him. “I’m starving.” He smiled as he went over to the table. But he didn’t make any attempt to hug her, or to kiss her.

“Would you like a glass of wine?” He asked as he took a bottle off the counter with two glasses. She nodded. He poured a small glass for himself and handed the other to Sam. Their fingers touched.  It was electric.

They sat down and ate in silence. It was horrible. It was like they were strangers and not lovers. Sam threw her napkin on the table beside her plate and said: