Give Me Something (30 page)

“
Yeah,” I breathed and moved aside to let him enter.  “What are you doing here?”

“
I came for the car,” he huffed as he crossed his arms.

“
What car?”

“
The BMW,” he answered. “Why else would I be here?  You made it pretty clear the last time I saw you that you didn't want anything to do with me,” he scoffed.

“
Don't start.” I rolled my eyes.  “You know exactly why I acted that way.” 

He shook his head.  “Would you just get your boyfriend so I can be on my way?”

Still not having a goddamned clue as to why he was here, I called out for Tucker, who sauntered into the room.  “Looks like this plan is working perfectly.”

“
What are you talking about?” I turned to him with the same confused look I'd been giving Nick.

“
Here's the deal,” he started explaining.  “I know you said you didn't want to talk to him, but I'm done worrying that one day you're going to lose your shit because you don't know his side of the story.  And you,” he turned to Nick, “can have these,” he held up the car keys, “after you explain to her why you did what you did.”

I felt my nostrils flair as I realized Tucker had pulled a fast one on both of us.  He knew that Nick wouldn't come back after what'd happened between us and he knew that I wasn't going to go to him.  By luring Nick in with the car and the promise that he wouldn't have to see me, he'd constructed the perfect con.

“I learned from the best, babe.” He leaned in and kissed my cheek.  “I've got some work to do in the office.  Keep your hands to yourself,” he warned as he pointed at Nick.  “Don't make me regret the fact that I didn't kick your ass the last time you touched her.”   He took his exit, leaving Nick and me both at a loss for words. 

“
What do you want to know?” Nick finally spoke.

“
First of all,” I sighed, “why were you sending my parents money?”

“
I wondered how long it would take before you went and saw them.”  He sat down on the small bench in the entryway, still casting the invisible shield I knew he always put up when it was time to tell the truth.  He motioned for me to sit next to him.  “I knew that you'd eventually realize that you needed them in your life.” 

I didn't move a muscle.  He knew that I needed to hear more.  He owed me that much.  “Go on,” I encouraged.

He continued as I took a seat on the bottom step of the staircase across from him.  Something in my rejection of his offer to join him on the bench must have let him know that I could no longer be persuaded by him.  I started to see the shield crumble away.   He sighed, dropping is head to his hands.  “It was after we started really making money.”  He looked up at me,  “I'd send them some every month.  I guess I always knew that you weren't as selfish as you acted.  I thought that, by me taking care of them for you, it would make me less selfish than I
knew
I was.”

I believed what he was saying.  Nick had always been the first to admit that he only cared about two things – himself and me.  His confession, confirmed two things.  He he had been trying to do something for me and maybe he knew me a little bit better than I even knew myself.

“What about my dad? You knew he was sick, didn't you?”  The look on his face spoke for a thousand people.  “Why didn't you tell me?”

“
I knew you'd leave,” he said in a faint whisper before he cast his eyes back to mine.

“
Jesus, Nick.” I stood, pacing across the hardwood floor as my hands smoothed the hair back from my face.  “Of course I would have left.  He's my dad.”

“
I know.” He matched my strides until we were standing side by side.  With his hand around the back of my arm, he turned me to face him.  “I'm so sorry, Lila,” he apologized, placing both hands on my shoulders.  “I didn't want to lose you.  I know it was selfish, but you are the only thing that has ever really been mine, and I couldn't stand the thought of you not being with me.”

“
That's not fair Nick,” I shook my head.  “This was about
my
family.”

“
You
are my family,” he said with a strained voice.  “Just you.”  The pain in his eyes crushed me.  “My mom's a liar, my dad's dead, and my brother hates me.  It was just you, Rae.  You have to believe how sorry I am,” he pleaded, reaching for my hand, hoping to get the confirmation that I just couldn't give him.

“
I don't know what to believe anymore.”

He was silent for a moment, but in a last ditch effort, he said, “If I could take it back I would.  Fuck, I'd take back everything.  I never would have asked you to do any of the shit you've done.  I never would have tried to force you to kiss me.  I never would have introduced you to Tucker,” his lips pursed and eyes squeezed tight as he exhaled the breath in his lungs and the regrets in his heart.  Dropping his hands from my shoulders, he turned as if he couldn't stand to see the gradual tears that were building in my eyes with each word he spoke.   He tangled his fingers in his hair.  “And I would have never pretended that the one night I spent with you wasn't the best night of my life.”

And just like that my entire world stopped on its axis.  “Nick... I...” Trying to respond to something like that from him was impossible.  Up until recently, that was the only thing I'd ever wanted to hear him say – that I was the best thing that had ever happened to him.  The thought that Tucker was only a few feet away didn't even cross my mind.  Everything that was happening at that moment was between me and Nick. I finally understood the reasons he was the way he was.  Watching his eyes fill with years' worth of tears – tears for the childhood he wished he could forget, the father he never knew and the girl he loved – was incredibly painful.  I couldn't take it anymore.  I rushed to him, wrapping my arms tightly around his neck and embracing the one person that always loved.

Epilogue

My dad's eyes were already misty as he offered me his arm. “Ready?”

I took one look at him in his tuxedo and immediately felt the butterflies in my stomach whip into a frenzy.  Smoothing out the white lace overlay on my gown, I placed my arm through his.  “Ready,” I nodded with a heavy breath.

“
You know,” he started and leaned, in whispering in my ear as Matt and Duncan pulled open the double doors leading into the church,  “I'm really glad that I'm getting to walk you down the aisle, baby girl.”

“
Me too.” I smiled at him, as I felt the eyes of two hundred people cast in our direction – my mother and brother from the front row, both with tears in their eyes, my bridesmaids in their emerald green dresses and smiles of real friendship on their faces, and the one person I had to thank for my Dad being here today. 

The day Nick finally told me the truth about everything seemed like forever ago.  Three years to be exact.  He finally proved that he really did love me.  I also knew that he did mean every word he said that day, including the part about wishing he'd never introduced me to Tucker. 

“I'm glad everything worked out this way,” I added, taking my first step down the aisle and locking eyes with the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with.

The nervous tug of his teeth against his bottom lip quickly released into a smile when he saw me.  His blue eyes never wavered from mine until the moment my father placed my hand in his.

“Take a breath, bro,” Nick whispered over his shoulder, casting a quick wink in my direction as he retook his best man position.

Tucker nodded, exhaled and pulled my hand to his lips. “You look beautiful.”

You didn't really think I'd let that one get away, did you?

$$$

The day Nick and I cleaned the slate, so to speak, was also the day I realized that no matter if I forgave him or how much love I had for him, it would still never compare to what I had with Tucker.  Nick knew it, too.  He'd said it himself that day, when the tears of regret and renewal finally stopped.  In the most selfless act Nick had ever shown, he shook Tucker's hand, told him to give me the life I deserved, and drove down the driveway in his dad's BMW.  Okay, well it wasn't completely selfless. It's baby steps with Nick
.

He wasn't gone for good that time though.  Nick finally went legit and focused his cunning abilities on a career.  Since graduating from college, he'd become kind of a big deal on the music scene.  Not only was he on high demand at the big city clubs – Chicago, New York, Las Vegas, etc... 
He'd also become a fixture at many star-studded events.  His accomplishments were impressive, but I wasn't surprised.  He was quite charming when he wanted to be.  I did worry about Nick falling back into old habits.  He was surrounded by beautiful, rich women daily and I may have been the only woman that had ever told him no.

When we had the time, Nick would visit us, either at our country home in Harrington or the townhouse we'd traded the apartment for in Chicago.  Tucker and I spent the week between places, thanks to my new job as Assistant Curator at the Museum of Modern Art.  Another thing that I was not the least bit surprised by was the way Tucker effortlessly transitioned from college graduate to CEO of Kline Implements.  There was no way his father wasn't looking down on him and smiling.  At both of his sons, for that matter.

Nick eventually took back the thought of wishing he'd never introduced me to Tucker.  It didn't take much time for him to see how happy Tucker made me.  I think that was part of the reason they started getting along.  Tension turned to friendship and eventually brotherhood.  They didn't always see eye to eye and there was always the occasional argument, but it was clear to see they loved each other.  I was grateful they had a chance to be each other's family now and I had a chance to rebuild the friendship Nick and I had lost somewhere along the way. 

The cool ocean breeze whirled across my body, sending a rippling of goose bumps across my bare skin and stirring me from a peaceful sleep. I reached across the king sized bed in search of my husband's warm body, wanting to curl myself around him and return to my previous state.  The past forty-eight hours had been the most wonderfully exhausting time of my life.  After our wedding and reception, Tucker had whisked me off to a little island paradise and straight to the honeymoon suite we were currently in.  Well, at least I was.

The heat from Tucker's body could still be felt on the empty pillow.  “Hmph,” I huffed at the realization that I was alone.  “Tucker,” I called out, opening my eyes, while simultaneously tugging at the sheet that would have to make due in his absence.  My eyes were scanning the room for him when I felt his smooth, strong hand brush across my backside and splay across my stomach as he tucked his body in behind mine and underneath the satin sheet that was draped across me.

“
Sorry, babe,” he said, his voice still carrying a sleepy rasp.  “I didn't mean to wake you.”

“
Where did you go?” I mumbled, a bit disoriented by his fingertips as they slowly massaged down the top of my thigh.

“
I wanted to check the labels on your clothes.”  His lips pressed into the spot where my neck and shoulder met, reigniting the fuse that had burned most of the night.

“
Hmm?” I replied automatically, only half-aware of what he'd just said, thanks to the distraction of his hand slipping between my legs.

“
You know... to see if you were made in heaven,” he chuckled, rolling me onto my back.

“
Oh, you're good,” I purred at his words and at the response he was evoking from my body, knowing that the majority of this honeymoon was going to spent exactly where we were.

“
You have no idea,” he grinned wickedly before brushing his lips across mine. “Buddy.”

Acknowledgments

There are no words that can express how grateful I am to the amazing people that have supported me on this journey.  Your words of encouragement are priceless.

Mickey – You are a miracle worker! I'm so happy to have found you and I couldn't imagine working with a better editor.  I appreciate your patience and ability to read my mind.  I hope this is the first of many books we work on together.

To my Betas – From bloggers to authors to friends and family, each of you helped me see Tucker and Lila in a different light.  I appreciate you taking the time to help me sculpt their love story into something wonderful!

Amanda – You have no idea how much your random tweets, inappropriate pins and flat out hilarity mean to me.  I'm so glad that we somehow found each other in the Twittersphere.  And thank you for introducing me to rest of the gang!  You girls make this whole social network thing a blast!

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