Girl Alone: Joss came home from school to discover her father’s suicide. Angry and hurting, she’s out of control. (20 page)

‘Joss,’ I said, holding her close, ‘has Eric abused Kevin?’

‘I don’t think so,’ she said, raising her head slightly and sniffing. ‘I think it was just me.’

But, of course, she couldn’t be sure.

She straightened and looked at me, her eyes red and her cheeks stained with tears. ‘Do you believe me?’ she asked, her voice shaking. ‘Do you see why Mum changed her mind about Zach?’

‘Yes, I do, love. I can see why, and I believe you.’

‘Oh, thank you, Cathy!’ she cried, and threw her arms around me.

I held her for some time. She’d said ‘other stuff’ had happened too, but it wasn’t for me to question her now. I needed to leave that for the police.

‘I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you sooner,’ she said through her tears. ‘I should have told you – I nearly did a few times, but I was worried you’d think I was lying, like Mum did.’

‘It’s all right,’ I said. I stroked her hair. ‘I understand why you couldn’t tell me. You’ve been very brave to tell me now.’

‘Will I have to talk to the police again?’ she asked. ‘I’m so tired. I just want to go to bed.’

‘You will have to talk to them at some point, but I don’t think it has to be tonight.’

‘Can I go to bed?’

I nodded and helped her stand – she was exhausted and drained from the emotion of crying and reliving the abuse. She leant heavily against me and we went upstairs. I saw her to her bedroom and left her to change while I went to my bedroom. I wanted to telephone Homefinders for confirmation that Joss wouldn’t have to talk to the police straight away. I explained what had happened to the member of staff on duty, and she said she’d speak to the duty social worker at the social services and then call me back. I went to Joss’s room to tell her, but she was already in bed asleep, her clothes in a tumbled pile by her bed, left where they’d fallen as she’d taken them off. I tucked her in, came out and went downstairs to wait for the telephone call from Homefinders. It was nearly 1 a.m. by the time they phoned and said the social worker had confirmed that, as Joss wasn’t in any immediate danger, the social services would initiate action the following morning, so there was no need to go to the police station tonight. I thanked her and went to bed.

The next day would be Monday, and it was the last day of the summer holidays before school returned for the autumn term. Normally, I would do something a little special with the family for the last day – lunch out, swimming or a similar activity – but I knew that was out of the question now. Tomorrow would be given over to supporting Joss as the social services and police began their investigations into her new claim of abuse. As I lay in the dark, tired but unable to sleep, I wondered how Linda would react now that it was out in the open. Would she still refuse to believe Joss? Or would doubt start to creep in to her previously unshakeable belief in her husband? Or – the worst-case scenario – had she known all along? Certainly she had failed to protect Joss, and questions would be asked.

Having had little sleep, I was up but not dressed at 7.30 the following morning when the doorbell rang. Surprised and apprehensive at an early morning visitor, I checked the security spyhole first. To my horror, two uniformed police officers stood at my door. Oh, hell! I thought. I was in my dressing gown and Joss wasn’t even awake yet. I unlocked and opened the door.

‘I’m sorry,’ I said, embarrassed. ‘I wasn’t expecting you so early. Joss isn’t up. Come in.’

‘Early morning is usually a good time to catch young people, before they head off out,’ one of the officers said with a smile as they came in. ‘We made this our first call of the shift. Looks like we’ve been lucky again.’

I thought his smile and casual approach was inappropriate considering they were here to take a statement from a victim of sexual abuse. Linda had said that Ann had been lovely at the station. It was a pity she hadn’t come.

‘This is PC Mike Salmon and I’m Joe Davies,’ he said.

‘Come and have a seat in the living room,’ I said, leading the way down the hall. ‘I’ll wake Joss now.’ I thought that, while I was upstairs, I’d also quickly put on some clothes.

‘Has she been behaving herself, then?’ Joe Davies asked. Both officers stood with their feet apart in the centre of the living room, looking around. I nodded. ‘You’re Joss’s foster carer, aren’t you?’ he said. ‘Linda told us we’d find her here.’

‘That’s right. But I don’t understand. You’ve been there? We gave this address at the station.’

‘It’s possible they have it, but Mike and I were given it by her mother a while back. We weren’t busy this morning, so we thought we’d follow it up. Do you want to fetch Joss now and get it over and done with?’

I took a step towards the living-room door and then stopped. ‘Sorry. Why have you come to see Joss?’ I asked.

It was their turn to look confused. ‘Apologies, I thought you knew. She was in the vicinity of a car that was set on fire a few weeks back. I’ve got the exact date here.’ He took out his notepad.

‘It’s OK,’ I said. I understood now. I returned to the centre of the room. ‘You obviously aren’t aware that Joss reported a serious sexual assault at the weekend. I thought you were here to interview her about that.’

Their expressions immediately changed and grew serious.

‘We didn’t know,’ Mike said. ‘That’s a separate unit. This weekend?’

‘Yes.’

He exchanged a glance with his colleague. ‘We’ll confirm it with the station, but I think we should probably leave this enquiry for now.’ Joe nodded. ‘We’ll call them from the car and let you know what’s decided.’

‘Thank you,’ I said. I followed them down the hall and saw them out.

As soon as I’d closed the front door I quickly ran upstairs and put on some clothes. My bedroom is at the front of the house and, once dressed, I discreetly looked out through my bedroom window. The police car was parked on the opposite side of the road and I could see the officers in the front talking on their radio, presumably to someone at the police station. The children hadn’t woken, so I returned downstairs where I made a quick coffee, which I took into the front room. I could see the police car from behind the net curtains, and a few minutes later I saw Mike get out, leaving Joe in the car. I left my coffee mug in the front room and went to answer the doorbell.

‘We’ve decided to leave this enquiry for now,’ Mike said. ‘Joss has enough to cope with.’ Which I thought was a kind and sensible decision. ‘Hope she’s OK.’

I thanked him, we said goodbye and I closed the front door. I didn’t know if their decision was based solely on the allegation Joss had made against Zach or if they were aware of the new one too, and it didn’t matter. It was the right decision. Joss didn’t need any more stress right now, and neither did I.

Joss woke just after 8.30 and came downstairs in her dressing gown. I asked her how she was and she said she felt a bit better and had slept well. I told her of the police visit and she too was relieved that she didn’t have to answer questions about setting the car on fire now. ‘I was very angry then,’ she said pensively. ‘I wouldn’t do that now.’

‘I’m pleased to hear it, Joss, and when the police come back you must tell them that.’

‘I will.’

In my experience, once a child starts to disclose the abuse they’ve suffered their anger begins to leave them almost immediately, as a huge burden has been lifted. I could already see a lighter, more open and responsive side to Joss, and she wasn’t always on the defensive now. She poured herself a juice and then went upstairs to shower and dress. Adrian was up and dressed next, and appeared in the kitchen, hungry as usual, just before nine o’clock. I scrambled his eggs while he toasted bread and I explained that I was expecting to spend most of the day dealing with something Joss had told me late last night. From being in a family that had fostered for many years, he understood the implications and didn’t press me for details. He said that once he had his school things sorted and ready for tomorrow, he’d probably see a friend in the afternoon. We ate breakfast together and then he went up to his room.

Jill telephoned about twenty minutes later, having been updated about Joss’s disclosure in respect of her stepfather by the team member on duty the night before. She began with a heartfelt sigh. ‘Dear me, it never rains but it pours. Do you believe her?’

‘Yes.’

‘And Joss said she’d told her mother but wasn’t believed?’ This was significant, as Linda could be accused of covering up the abuse and failing to protect her daughter.

‘That’s what Joss said,’ I confirmed.

‘You know what her mother will say, don’t you?’ Jill said. ‘That Joss has never liked Eric, resented him for trying to be her father, and has made this up to get rid of him.’

‘I know, but I’m sure Joss is telling the truth.’

‘And Joss is prepared to make a statement to the police?’ Jill asked. This could be another indicator of the sincerity of a young person; if they were lying, they were likely to back down and withdraw the allegations at the mention of making a statement to the police.

‘Yes, she is,’ I said.

‘OK. I’ll telephone Amelia when she’s had a chance to speak to the duty social worker. She’ll want to talk to Joss as soon as possible. There will be concerns about her brother too, although Joss is saying she doesn’t think he touched Kevin. Is Joss with you now?’

‘She’s upstairs.’

‘How is she?’

‘Relieved that it’s finally out in the open, I think. She looks less anxious. She did say she should have told me sooner.’

‘And the reason she didn’t is because she thought you wouldn’t believe her?’ Jill asked.

‘Yes. That’s what she said.’

‘I guess it makes sense.’

I then told Jill about the visit we’d had that morning from the police officers about the burning car.

‘I’m glad common sense prevailed,’ Jill said. ‘I’ll let Amelia know when I phone her. And when you have a moment, Cathy, can you write up your notes while it’s still fresh in your mind? Then we’ll have a copy ready on file if it’s needed.’

‘I will,’ I said.

‘And keep Joss with you today. I can’t imagine she wants to go out, but Amelia will want to talk to her at some point.’

‘All right.’

We said goodbye and I replaced the receiver. Lucy and Paula were up now, and I could hear their voices and Joss’s as the three of them talked on the landing. When Lucy and Paula came down in their dressing gowns a short while later, they both looked very shocked.

‘Joss told you?’ I asked.

‘Yes. It’s awful. What a pervert Eric is,’ Lucy said.

‘He was supposed to be her new dad!’ Paula said, disgusted.

And for a moment an uncomfortable thought flashed across my mind that Joss might have told them for dramatic effect, which would have given credence to her mother’s assertion that she made things up for attention. But then we all handle trauma in different ways, and sharing it with her peers was probably Joss’s way of coping – now that it was out in the open, she felt comfortable telling others she trusted. Not for the first time, though, I worried about the effect all of this was having on my children. Paula had gone very pale.

‘Try not to worry,’ I said to them both. ‘Now Joss has been able to tell us, she’ll receive the help she needs.’

‘First her boyfriend and now her stepfather. It’s dreadful,’ Lucy said.

‘Yes, it is,’ I agreed.

I then told them, as I had Adrian, that my day would largely be taken up with Joss, which they understood, and I suggested that they might like to go out after lunch for a while, once they’d got everything ready for school in the morning. They decided to go into town together window shopping. Lucy had a birthday coming up and I asked her to look out for some present ideas.

They had some cereal and toast and then went upstairs to shower and dress. I sat in the living room and wrote up my log notes. There was a lot to write, and I used Joss’s words as much as possible – a verbatim account – when she’d described the abuse. Although the telephone was silent, I knew there would be a lot going on at the social services, and as I wrote, I was on tenterhooks, half expecting it to ring at any moment. Joss was also waiting for news and she came down a couple of times just to ask if I’d heard anything from her social worker or the police. I reassured her that I’d tell her as soon as I did. It would have helped her if she’d been able to go out with Lucy and Paula and take her mind off it, but that wasn’t an option.

Although I was expecting the telephone to ring, I was completely unprepared for the next call. I was making lunch for us all before Adrian, Lucy and Paula went out. I answered the phone in the kitchen, expecting to hear Jill, Amelia or even the police, but it was Linda, distraught, angry and in tears.

‘How could you?’ she began. ‘I can’t believe what you’ve done. Why did you have to pass on all those lies to the social services? You know what Joss is like!’

I spoke calmly. ‘Linda, I have to tell the social services what a child says if they make an allegation. I am sure it will be properly investigated.’

‘Yes! They are investigating us!’ she cried. ‘They already think we’re guilty. They’re coming here this afternoon, and they want to see Kevin. My little boy. How could you, Cathy? Supposing they take him!’ She broke down, sobbing.

‘Linda,’ I said gently, ‘the social services won’t just take Kevin. They can’t remove him without a court order, and they wouldn’t be able to get that unless there was a very good reason.’

‘Well, there isn’t!’ she snapped. ‘But how am I going to convince them after all the lies Joss has told? You’ve believed her, and they will too. You should have just ignored her.’

Which, of course, was what Linda had done.

‘I can’t believe you’d do this!’ Linda cried. ‘You’ve ruined my life, the two of you, with these lies. You can tell Joss she’s never to set foot in my house again. I’m finished with her. That’s it.’ And with a sob, she put down the phone.

I took a deep breath. I could appreciate why Linda was so upset – she’d had a big shock, and now she felt threatened at the possibility that Kevin could be removed. She obviously loved her children, I didn’t doubt that, but she’d failed to protect Joss, and she’d have to convince the social services that Kevin wasn’t in any danger. Contrary to what I’d previously thought might happen, far from having any doubts about Eric, Linda now seemed even more convinced that her daughter was lying. I’m not sure I would have been so certain in her position, but then you never know how you would react in the face of trauma.

A few minutes later the phone rang again. ‘Cathy, it’s Jill. Are you free to talk?’

‘Yes. Linda has just telephoned. She’s very upset and angry and is blaming me.’

‘What did she say?’

I told her.

‘I’ll mention it to Amelia when I next speak to her. It’s not appropriate for Linda to be phoning you while she and Eric are being investigated. Although she’s right that the social services have concerns around Kevin. Amelia wants to see Joss first – she’ll phone you later with a time – and then she’ll visit Linda and talk to Kevin.’ Jill paused, and I knew she was choosing her words carefully. ‘Cathy, I know you believe what Joss told you about her stepfather, and the social services are taking it seriously, but can you make sure Joss understands the gravity of her allegations? That Kevin could be taken into care? Don’t frighten her, just make sure she knows the implications.’

‘I will,’ I said. ‘Does Amelia have doubts that Joss is telling the truth, then?’

‘She raised the question, as I did, of whether it was possible that Joss was doing this to get back at Eric because she resented him. But the department is taking Joss’s allegations seriously and acting on them.’

‘I’ll speak to Joss and make sure she understands,’ I confirmed.

‘Thank you, Cathy. And if Linda telephones you again, tell her to call Amelia if she needs to speak to someone.’

‘Thanks. I will.’

I replaced the handset and went upstairs to speak to Joss. I knew I had to be careful how I phrased what I’d been asked to say. It had taken a lot of courage for Joss to speak out and I didn’t want to undermine the trust she’d placed in me and the social-care system by suggesting we didn’t believe her. Her bedroom door was partly open, but nevertheless I knocked as usual. ‘Come in,’ her little voice called from the other side. ‘Be careful where you step. I’m tidying up.’

I took one step into her room but couldn’t go any further as the floor was covered with the contents of her drawers and wardrobe.

‘I thought I’d sort out my stuff while I had the time,’ she said.

‘Excellent,’ I said, impressed.

‘I heard the phone ring – is there any news?’ she now asked, looking at me anxiously.

‘Jill just telephoned,’ I said. ‘Amelia will be coming to see us later. Then she’ll visit your mother and Kevin. Joss, you need to prepare yourself for the fact that if the social services believe Kevin is at risk of being abused, they may take him into foster care.’

‘But I told you, that perv didn’t touch him. It was just me,’ she blurted.