Gilded Lily (30 page)

“Sounds good.” He pulled away from her. “I was making room for my boots in the hall closet and moved a box that said
letters.
Do you want me to take it up to the attic?”

“No. No. That can go in the closet in the bedroom next to ours. I want them close.”

“Whose letters are they? Do you have some sexy pen pal you forgot to tell me about?”

“No, silly,” she said as she started to walk out of the kitchen.

“Hey, wait. Whose wrote the letters? Are they yours?”

Lily stopped in the doorway. “They are the letters my grandpa wrote to my grandma when he was in the war. Well, and a lot of them were written after too. He was a poet with a romantic heart and wrote her beautiful letters. I never had the heart to throw them out after she died. Putting them up in the attic seemed cruel, so I left them down here where I could be close to them.”

“Tell you what,” Adam said as he went to her and pulled her in for a hug. “Let’s forget this unpacking for a little bit and relax. Let these boxes sit and go get me the salve from the fridge.”

“But Adam…” she pleaded.

“We need to get you somewhat healed up and fast. I want to punish you again, and I can’t very well do it with your back looking like that.” He pulled the cotton shirt up over her head and spun her around. He had been extra harsh on her yesterday. She’d kept coming and coming; he’d enjoyed it as much as she had. He smacked her on the ass, sending her toward the refrigerator.

* * * *

“Please, Adam.” Adam heard Lily’s cries from behind the wooden door. “Please let me out!” He leaned against the outside of the door as she banged her fists against the solid wood. “Please. Don’t do this to me.” Tears had to be drenching her cheeks by now. Adam’s heart sank. “I promise to be good. I won’t touch it again. I promise! Please!”

Adam continued his stoic stance, waiting for her pleas to stop. He rubbed his forehead, knowing soon enough she’d fall into the blackness of what was happening and find the joy in it. A small grin tilted his lips as he thought about the look on her face when he’d found her in the outdoor bathtub. He’d told her not to masturbate and there she was, working that little hand as hard as she could to make herself come. It was his fault. He sighed. He hadn’t fucked her in over three days. They were both going mad, but he had to force her into despair so he’d have a real reason to truly punish her.

The bangs on the other side of the door slowed, as did her cries. Footsteps echoed from inside the tiny shack. She was walking around. He’d been down the hill a few days earlier and prepared everything. The basics were all she’d need—a mattress he’d bought and laid on the wide planks of the hardwood floor; a sheet he’d folded up and laid at one end of the mattress and a pillow at the other; a large porcelain basin; the journal he’d found inside a box while he was unpacking; and last a pen. He’d bring the rest later.

He turned to the door and fastened the heavy hook-and-eye latch.
There. She’ll be content soon enough.
The noise stopped completely from inside the little shack. Adam sat down on the thin wooden planks of the front stoop. Nick had done a nice job securing the roof and fixing the water pump. He’d even painted the handle bright red. Adam sighed as he leaned his elbows on his knees. Had he put sunscreen on her today? He’d bring some tomorrow. For now, he wanted her to get settled in and accept that this was her time to face the demons haunting her. She might live in her grandmother’s house, but the void left by her grandmother’s death wasn’t going to be filled by material objects. Just like Nick. A bathtub and a few paintbrushes weren’t going to bring him back. Losing two very close people would be too much for anyone to handle.

He wanted more for Lily than just surviving emotionally from day to day. She deserved to experience the true joys of life without the baggage of loss and despair. She’d been handling that long enough. This was her time to grow and gather the puzzle pieces together. The time she was going to spend down here was destined to bring her peace and give the fresh start for them to begin their lives together. They would build from the strength she found in this meadow.

Nick was right, Adam thought as he ran his hand over his sweat-drenched forehead. There was a presence on this land. The air was embedded with the whispering voices and moving shades of people. This was the place where memories came to expand or die. For his Lily Flower, those memories were going to do both.

“Adam?” He heard her soft voice behind the door. It sounded low, as if she was sitting on the floor. He kept silent. “Are you still there?” She sniffled. “If you are, please let me out. I promise I won’t disobey you again. I promise.”

He turned to stand, then stopped. He leaned against the door so she could hear him. “Tell me your safe word.”

“What?”

“Now, tell me your safe word.”

There was a long pause behind the door.

“Marigold.”

This was what she needed. He could tell in the tone of her voice, the way she tensed when they talked about her grandmother. The sadness in her eyes when she talked about Nick affected him. The memories of what she’d lost taunted her. Her grandmother left her longing for the innocence she’d once cherished; the bastard who made her feel shame took away her strength to fight for her pleasure; and the loss of her friend left her scarred. He knew the memories had to fuel her passion instead of hindering the desire she deserved. The time had come for her to accept what she’d lost and cherish what she’d shared with the people she loved. The time was now to let go—to experience complete abandonment. The meadow was the perfect place for her to safely let that energy transform into something beautiful.

Adam started to make his way up the grassy incline. He looked back at the shack. Dusk was coming. He’d bring her something to eat, then leave her. Excitement filled his chest as he thought about her washing herself tomorrow. She’d be as wild as a caged cat, and he’d savor every moment of it.

ADAM HADN’T ANSWERED. Lily looked around the small space as she hovered by the locked door. She’d promised she wouldn’t touch herself again. She shivered as she remembered the look on Adam’s face when he found her in the outdoor tub. She thought he’d gone to town, that she could just sneak a moment. But she’d quickly realized she’d been wrong when she saw the disappointed look on his face. So here she was, sitting naked on a hardwood floor with a mattress and an old, worn journal.
He’s got some nerve!
She’d specifically told him she didn’t like it down here; too many memories.

Lily wrapped her arms around her knees and pulled them close to her chest. Inside the cobblestone fireplace were ashes piled on the hearth floor. Who had been here? There were only two small windows that were crossed with two thin wooden slats. The herbal aroma of lemongrass and lavender filled the dusty air. There was no furniture, no radio, no TV. No other soul to speak to. She was alone.
Alone.
The one place she feared most. The one place Keith had said she’d always be. Realizing that dusk was looming outside and nightfall wouldn’t be far behind, she peered out of the dust-covered window as tears began to fall again.

“Why did you leave me?” She started to sob, then gathered her breath. The realization slapped her. The empty feeling deep inside her wasn’t because Adam had left her. The others had. Her grandma’s frail body had given up. Lily had sung to her while her lungs slowly weakened. The antibiotics weren’t working fast enough, and the pneumonia was taking its toll on the withered body lying in the bed.

Lily dipped her head to stare at the dusty floor. She’d spent night after night reading from the wretched romance novels her grandmother had kept next to her chair in the living room. Finally, on a Tuesday afternoon, her grandmother fell quietly asleep for the last time.

Lily felt the heat on her cheeks cool with the tears drying there. She wasn’t going to break down again. She didn’t want to use her safe word. She was strong and could be down here without losing it. She recalled the last time she and her grandma had worked in the garden. She’d come back home from college to visit. They’d spent the greater part of the afternoon sweltering in the sun and drinking sweet tea as the dragonflies and bees did their familiar dance.

“You know why my flowers grow so well here, Lily?” she’d asked.

“Why?”

“Stop, love. Listen to me.”

Lily had stopped fussing and looked at her grandmother.

“Because they know I’ll be back to see them. They smile at us. Look.” She pointed to a giant sunflower with its bright yellow petals radiating from its ebony center. “She’s watching over everyone, just like I do.”

Lily shook her head to release the memory. She didn’t want to think about that afternoon. College had taken her away. Her life had gone from hectic to out of control, and the summer visits had dwindled. Phone calls and letters had replaced the warm afternoons spent swinging on the porch and picking carrots from the garden. Life had happened, and at the same time, life had thrown her away.

She jumped to her feet and started looking around for a flashlight or lantern. Certainly Nicholas had kept some kind of light in here. If a mattress was here, he must have had a light somewhere. She stopped and looked over at the mattress. It was new. The white cotton sheet, it was new too. Nicholas hadn’t left these things in here. They looked fresh, newly placed.
He’s planning this for me. He cares enough to keep me comfortable.
Adam had planned to punish her all along, but had also tended to her needs. But how long was she to be kept in captivity? Surely he’d be back to get her by nightfall. He knew she was afraid of the dark, but mostly of being alone in it.

She leaned her forehead against the thin glass of the window. The meadow was stretched out before the line of slave quarters. The tall grass and wildflowers were scattered across the field. The beautiful rainbow of colors had obviously been neglected. Even if she could get out, she’d cut herself on the prickly vines of the wild roses.

The confined space started to grow smaller and smaller as the sun finally made its last descent. How quickly the darkness came down here, much faster than up at the house.

The last of the light left the meadow as Lily lingered on the mattress with the pillow buried against her chest. With knees drawn, she curled up. “Oh, Adam,” she whispered, “please come for me.”

She moved her leg and felt the point of something dull. Moving her hand down the mattress, she stopped when she felt the hard cover of the journal sitting on the bed. It was too dark to write in it. She rolled over and set it on the floor next to the mattress. She stilled.
What was that?

There was a rustling outside, behind the back wall. Lily buried her face in the pillow. There it was again. What kind of animal would make a noise like that? Lily held on to the pillow so tight her body began to shake.

Lily startled when she heard the sound at the front of her solitary prison. “Is someone out there?” she yelled. She heard metal rub against metal before the door slowly swung open. Lily could see the shadow of an arm reach inside, down low, near the floor. “Adam?” She tried to reach the door before it closed.

The door banged shut before Lily reach it. She tried the handle. It was locked. She looked down at the container on the floor. She picked it up. The wonderful aroma of fresh bread and honeydew wafted over her nose. Frantically, she opened the lid to find the small loaf of bread laden with honey and butter along with a pile of honeydew and blueberries nestled inside the container. A plastic tumbler sat beside where the container had been. Lily opened the lid to find the plastic cup full of wine. Next to it was another tumbler filled with water. Even through the darkness, she found the joy to smile.

After arranging the containers on the floor, she sat her bare bottom on the hard, dirty floor and used her dust-covered fingers to fill her mouth with the sweet honeydew. The space didn’t seem so bad now.

Lily trembled. But maybe, just maybe, Nicholas had been right. It could be haunted. As Lily ate her supper, she sipped the wine and looked around the space, trying to push the disturbing thought from her mind. It looked so different in the darkness. Somehow quieter…safer. She savored the thickness of the honey as she devoured the warm bread. She hadn’t realized how famished she was until she smelled the food.

As she sat eating, she stilled and listened to the sounds coming from outside. The crickets were loud. The frogs chimed in with their deep bellows. Then the familiar hoot of an owl rose above the chorus. Lily smiled at the sound, realizing she was no different than the wild menagerie stuck out here in this overgrown meadow, only they were free to roam, to fly—and she wasn’t. A sense of comfort washed over her. She was fed, safe, and content. Drowsiness silently blanketed her as she crawled back to the mattress.

* * * *

The afternoon sun filtered through the room, revealing the clouds of dust sputtering up from the floor as she paced the small space.
Where is he?
Thirst coupled with the rising afternoon heat wasn’t making the situation any easier.
Where is someone, anyone? Damn!
She lay on her back, watching the rafters in the ceiling. Remembering the journal, she crawled back to the mattress and grabbed the leather-covered book from the spot where it had been left last night.

The prickly hardness of the boards on her naked belly brought a welcome sensation. Surprisingly, the first page had already been written on. Lily sighed as she read the passage. The sight of Adam’s handwriting made her heart ache for his touch.

I watch her while she is playing in her garden. I watch her while she is cooking my supper. I watch her while she is lying underneath me, writhing with my cock buried inside of her. And my favorite time to watch her is while she is moaning as my whip is coming down on her. And now, she is locked up in the little shack, waiting for my touch, my cock. She is dirty, thirsty, hungry, hot, and desperate. She is my lover, my slave.

Lily gasped and slammed the cover shut. When was he coming back? Questions flooded her mind as she looked for the discarded pen. She scurried back to the journal and turned to the second page. The gleaming white page called to her to write her secrets as well.