Gift of Desire (5 page)

“Oh God,” Cordy whispered. She covered her mouth with her hand and closed her eyes tightly. After a moment her hand began to smooth over Rhys’ arm again, and Jeremy saw it tremble. “You said you loved him. How does Rhys feel?” she asked in a shaky voice. She pulled her head up and faced them, looking at Jeremy and then Rhys, who had his eyes open now.

“I’ve always loved him,” Rhys said quietly. “Perhaps not the way I do now. But things changed in Algiers. I don’t know how to explain it. He’s closer than a brother to me. I can’t live without him.”

“I see.” Cordy licked her lips. “Jeremy?”

“I love him,” Jeremy said with quiet dignity. “I can’t give him up.”

Rhys tried to pull away from them both then, Jeremy’s words perhaps finally getting through to him. Jeremy pushed on his shoulder to keep him down. “I won’t come between you. I’ll leave, if that’s what you want.”

“Where do I fit in?” Cordy asked, far more timid than he’d ever seen her. She was a little ball of insecurity, curled up in front of Rhys, her fingers barely touching his chest. Jeremy saw Rhys reach for her hand and kiss her palm.

“I have loved you for a very long time,” he said quietly.

“Then why did you walk away from me? Why did you give Jeremy the field?” she asked in confusion.

“Because he was the better man for you,” Rhys said simply. “He had a very promising career, a prestigious family connection. He could give you things I couldn’t.”

“Would you rather have married Rhys?” Jeremy asked, for the first time wondering if he’d been wrong to let Rhys step back and give him Cordy. Somehow, at the time, he’d known deep inside they would always be together, the three of them, no matter which of them married Cordy. “I love you too, more than I can say. But if it’s Rhys you want…”

“No,” she said firmly. “I just…oh, it was difficult. I loved you both, and wanted you both, and I knew I couldn’t have you both.” She swiped at her cheek and Jeremy realized she was crying again. What a difficult day she’d had, and they were making it harder with this conversation. But it all had to be said. Tonight. Before they fell back into their old roles, their old relationships, their old lies. “My family had instructed me to accept Jeremy if you both asked, for the same reasons you gave,” she told Rhys. “And I suppose I would have followed their advice. I loved you both. There was no wrong choice. I just didn’t want to make a choice at all.”

“Then you understand perfectly how I feel,” Jeremy said passionately, leaning over Rhys’ shoulder and brushing her hair back from her face. “I love you both. We don’t have to make a choice, Cordy. We can both have it all. All three of us, we can have it all.”

Cordelia stared at Jeremy. Could it be true? Could she really have them both? It seemed impossible. Hurt feelings, jealousy, the forbidden nature of such a relationship—all of those obstacles stood in their way. And yet she wanted it. She’d shied away from the idea of taking both Rhys and Jeremy as lovers, but now she confronted the reality head-on. She watched Jeremy as he smoothed his hand gently over Rhys’ scarred back. The touch was loving, she could see that now. And arousing. Jeremy was still naked, and she could see his cock was hard. She could feel Rhys’ erection through his pants where they were pressed against each other. She didn’t think it was only the result of her nudity and their proximity. It was also Jeremy’s touch. There was more here than their mutual desire for her, she was sure of it, whether or not they’d acknowledged it yet or not. She could accept both of them as lovers, being shared by the two men. But could she share them with each other?

She leaned up on one elbow, not caring that the blanket fell away and exposed her breasts. She wanted to see their reaction to her. Jeremy had already fucked her tonight, his touch as masterful and satisfying as it had always been. Surely he couldn’t fuck her like that and not feel something for her. His words of love rang true, and when his gaze met hers she could see it in his face. She focused on the way he was touching Rhys, and his movements changed, became slower and more like caresses meant to arouse rather than soothe. He ran one hand down to Rhys’ lower back and dipped his fingers under the waistband of Rhys’ trousers, and Rhys audibly sucked in a shaky breath.

Cordelia turned her attention to Rhys then. He was watching her, and there was no mistaking the heat in his eyes. He looked down at her breasts and then back up at her face. Then he focused on her breasts again. He tentatively reached over and ran one finger around a nipple, and it peaked and her breast quivered as she shivered at the touch. Her breathing accelerated, but she didn’t protest. Rhys slid his whole hand up and over her breast and then he cupped it in his palm, massaging it. It felt delicious and erotic.

She looked up and saw Jeremy watching them. When he caught Cordelia’s gaze he rose to his knees so she could see his cock, hard and standing straight out, the way she loved to see it, so strong and proud and hers. But it wasn’t anymore, was it? It was theirs, hers and Rhys’, because he was here. He would see them together, he would become intimate with their bodies, their bed play. He would see Jeremy aroused. Jeremy glided his fist around his cock and pumped twice and a small drop of liquid eased out and wet the tip. She felt a thrill of desire skitter down her spine and she knew then, without a doubt, that she didn’t care that he wanted to share this with Rhys. It felt right that he do so, after all they’d been through together.

“Tell me now if this isn’t what you want, Cordelia,” Rhys said hoarsely. “I’ve waited a very long time to have you. I’m not sure I could stop if we go any further.”

“Jeremy?” she asked, wanting them both so badly she was weak with need. But it was all so new to her, this idea of the three of them, the fact that she could have what she’d always wanted with no ugly consequences.

“I want it,” Jeremy said firmly. “I want to watch you two together.”

Cordelia gave a shaky gasp, his words making her channel clench with desire, her sex throb with an empty ache. She looked down at Rhys. “Yes,” she breathed out. “Oh, Rhys, yes. I want this.”

Rhys held her back with his hand on her chest when she would have kissed him. “I am not the man I was,” he said quietly. “I’m damaged, Cordelia, and I know it. Not just outside, but inside as well. Look at me. Really look at me.”

She understood then his unhappiness, his hesitation, the awkwardness between them. He’d lost his confidence, something he’d had in abundance when they were courting. His distance from her wasn’t because he didn’t care, but because he didn’t think she could anymore. She didn’t get angry over his lack of faith in her. He’d been through a horrible, difficult ordeal, and the whole world must seem a frightening place to him. But she’d change that. Through her love and devotion he’d see that there was still something worth living for, something beautiful and worthy and steadfast here between the three of them.

“I am looking at you,” she said as she cupped his cheek. She ran her thumb along his upper lip. “And you are beautiful to me. Everything I could want and more. Don’t you understand, Rhys? I have loved you since you first smiled at me, since you first kissed my hand and said my name. That hasn’t changed for me. I grieved…” She got choked up and had to swallow as a tear slipped down her cheek. “I grieved as much for your absence and your suffering as I did for Jeremy’s. I prayed for your return as fervently as I prayed for his. The happiest moment of my life was seeing you both standing at the door today.”

She leaned over and kissed him then, kissed him as she’d been longing to do for years. Rhys gave an almost inaudible whimper and then he took control of the kiss, and of her. He grabbed the back of her head and devoured her mouth hungrily, tasting and nipping and she was lost to him. Completely lost. It was her turn to whimper and she stretched out atop him, pressing her sex to his hip.

“Christ,” Rhys growled out after he tore his mouth from hers. He slid down and took Cordelia’s nipple in his mouth. She gasped again and then clutched the back of his head, pressing his mouth tighter to her.

“She likes it a bit rough,” Jeremy said, his voice dark and low with command.

Rhys obeyed, sucking her nipple hard and then biting it. She cried out, her hips jerking. She could feel how wet she was, feel the cream coating her sex. “Oh God,” she moaned. The combination of the two of them, the two men she loved, wanting her and fucking her together like this, it was madness and heaven. Suddenly Rhys rolled her over, their positions reversed.

“My back is fine,” he growled to Jeremy. “I can move now. I can do this.”

“Good,” Jeremy said. “Then do it.” He grabbed the blanket and yanked it off the two of them. The cold burst over her, giving her goose bumps, but Rhys leaned down and sucked her breast again and her shivers became tremors of another sort.

“Spread your legs,” Rhys told her. His voice was desperate, harsh and quick. She did as he ordered and then his hand was there, cupping her, running his fingers through her wet pubic hair. “Ah, God,” he groaned. “I can feel how wet you are. Is that from Jeremy?” His finger shoved inside her and Cordelia cried out, arching her back off the bed. “Mmm,” Rhys murmured, kissing her neck and licking her overheated skin as he fucked his finger in and out several times. “So tight,” he said, as if talking to himself.

“Yes,” Cordelia told him, knowing instinctively what he wanted, what he needed. “His cock felt so good. I want yours too. I want you inside me.” She bucked against his hand. “I need you.”

“Yes,” he hissed against her skin. He slid his body completely on top of hers and his hips slammed against her. She could feel how hard he was, how big, but his pants were still on. She moaned in distress.

“I wanted this to be so perfect for you,” Rhys said, sounding angry again. “But I’m mucking it all up.”

“Nonsense,” Jeremy told him sharply. “Get up, and we’ll do this properly.” He helped as Rhys gingerly came to his knees. “All right?” Jeremy asked. His tone was brisk, very commander-like. Cordelia hid a smile.

Rhys nodded. “Yes. Better than I thought I would be.” He smiled rakishly at Cordelia. “Perfect for what I need.”

Cordelia smiled back tremulously. That smile of his—God, just like he used to smile at her. “Good.” She pulled her knees up, her legs spread, showing him her sex. Jeremy had always liked that, when she showed him how eager she was, how aroused and wet and wanting him.

“Damn,” Rhys said breathlessly. “Damn.” He reached out and ran a finger down the lips of her sex and then he brought it to his mouth and sucked it clean. Cordelia moaned at the sight. Then she saw that Jeremy was undoing the falls on Rhys’ pants. He slowly pushed them down over Rhys’ hips, revealing a cock that was huge and thick, the veins prominent down the sides, the head dark and swollen and wet. It was an amazing cock, Rhys’ cock, and Cordelia wanted it, in her mouth, her sex. She didn’t care, she just wanted it.

Then Jeremy took Rhys’ cock in his fist and pumped, his other arm snaking around Rhys’ waist and pulling him back. “No,” Rhys said in a strangled voice. She knew Jeremy’s cock must be nestled in the crease of Rhys’ backside. She shivered and scrambled to her knees, leaning forward, opening her mouth. Jeremy knew what she wanted and he pointed Rhys’ cock toward her, holding it steady while she wrapped her lips around it and took it deep in her mouth.

“Cordelia,” Rhys ground out, his hips just barely moving, his cock thrusting only slightly in her mouth. He pushed her away with a hand on her head. “You don’t have to. Stop.”

“I want to,” she told him desperately. “Let me, please.” She clutched his hip and took him in her mouth again, tried to force him to move, to fuck her mouth the way Jeremy liked to, the way she liked. She loved to taste him, and Rhys was no different. Salty and tangy and all man. She wrapped her tongue around him and pulled back and moved forward, moving her mouth on him. She pulled off his cock when he groaned deeply and she licked the slit in the plump head, and finally Rhys gave in and his hips thrust wildly at her.

“My God,” Jeremy said, appreciation and desire in his voice. “I’ve always loved the way she sucks my cock. I told you, Rhys. I told she was marvelous. There’s nothing she doesn’t like, nothing she won’t do.”

Cordelia felt inordinately pleased at Jeremy’s praise. She wanted to please him. She wanted to fuck Rhys perfectly, not just for Rhys, but for Jeremy, who wanted to see it, who enjoyed watching it. She could have them both. It was a dream come true for her. She made a great show of licking up and down Rhys big cock, her tongue lapping at the salty nectar leaking out of the end.

“I’m going to come before I can fuck her,” Rhys gasped.

“Then do it,” Jeremy told him. He still held Rhys’ cock in his fist and he pumped the lower end while Cordelia sucked the tip. “We’ll bring you up again, and you can take her slowly then.”

“I want you to fuck her too,” Rhys gasped. “I want to watch you too.”

It was Cordelia’s turn to gasp around Rhys’ cock. She pulled off. “Oh, yes. Yes, please. I want to do that.” She needed them both this first time. The way it would always be now.

“Cordelia,” Rhys growled. He cupped the back of her head and thrust back into her mouth. “You are just as perfect as Jeremy claimed.” He fucked in and out. “You are insatiable.” She nodded around the cock in her mouth, unable to speak. She could tell Rhys was close, he was so hard and throbbing against her tongue.

“You are both perfect,” Jeremy told him, squeezing the end of Rhys’ cock. Cordelia could see his knuckles were white with the strength of his grip and Rhys groaned. She sucked harder and he bucked against Jeremy’s hold. “Come in her mouth,” Jeremy whispered. “I want to kiss her while she tastes like you.”

Rhys cried out and then she tasted his release as it flooded her mouth. She groaned at how exquisite it was, how much it tasted like Rhys. It was so intimate. She swallowed and swallowed, not wanting to waste a drop, hardly able to believe he was hers now.

Rhys fell back in Jeremy’s arms, spent from his release, shocked and delighted at Cordelia’s response to him, to this. His cock slipped from her lips. She straightened and crawled on her knees closer to the two men. Jeremy leaned over Rhys’ shoulder and she kissed him, letting him have a taste of Rhys in her mouth. She cupped the back of Jeremy’s head, her other hand resting on Rhys’ bare chest, while Jeremy licked at the corners of her lips where Rhys saw a little semen remained. Jeremy growled against her mouth before plunging his tongue inside. She trembled against Rhys as Jeremy drank from her mouth. Rhys was mesmerized by the erotic kiss and wanted to join them, but was afraid.
What am I doing? Where was this all going?