Authors: Martina Cole
One thing Elton knew for sure was that Ray worshipped his wife and his infatuation with younger women was nothing in the grand scheme of things. Now Elton had to take the girl and make her body disappear into thin air, and that was really not what he wanted to be doing.
Sharon couldn’t sleep but that was nothing unusual. She had not slept an entire night since her wedding to Ray all those years ago. Her sons were both now firmly embedded in the Life, and that broke her heart every bit as much as it pleased them. They were both thrilled to death to be villains, and what could she do? They had been determined and Ray, whatever he tried to pretend otherwise, had encouraged them to follow his example. He saw their rise in that world as a reflection upon himself. It was only young Kathy that he wanted to stay outside the Life – should she ever embrace it, it would kill him. Ray wanted his daughter to be a doctor or a scientist. It did not occur to him that, for all her expensive education, she wasn’t academic in any way, shape or form. She was a nice, normal girl, who didn’t see herself as some kind of fucking intellectual needing to prove herself every second of the day. But that was how Ray treated her. Sharon was aware that it worried her lovely daughter. Kathy simply wanted to please the people around her. She was seventeen and she was still finding her feet. Why did Ray need her to act like she was only put on this earth to please him?
She heard young Lenny come into the room and she forced herself to face him, but she’d had a large glass of wine and she could feel the animosity coming off him. He hated that she needed a few drinks to get her through the day, but who the fuck was he to tell her how to live her life? He was Ray’s son now, and they both knew that.
‘Where’s Kathy?’ His voice was clipped and she could tell he was angry at her. He saw her as just someone who wanted to drink and nothing else.
‘She is staying at her mate’s. Was she supposed to ask your permission?’ She was angry and it came across in her tone.
She watched young Lenny look her over and find her wanting. It was a deliberate rebuke and she had seen it many times before. Oh, he was Ray’s boy now, there was no doubt about that.
‘Can I help you, son?’ Her sarcasm was evident.
‘Who is she staying with?’
His lack of respect for her was hard to live with. Even her own mother had told her that he needed a right-hander, but what would it achieve?
‘Who the fuck do you think? Where does she usually stay, Len? At Maria’s. Maria, the girl she has been friends with for years. Going to check up on her, are we?’
It would not be the first time. Kathy had been in high dudgeon when he had turned up there before. In fact she had been livid. And she’d had every right to be; after all, Sharon trusted her, so why couldn’t her father and her brothers? If she didn’t look out for her daughter, the girl would be on lock-down.
‘Are you going out or not, Len?’
She dismissed him, unable to bear the antagonism between them. It broke her heart, because she loved her sons, whatever they might think of her. They were more Ray’s boys now than they had ever been hers.
Kathy was at her friend’s house and she was laughing her head off when Maria’s mum knocked on the bedroom door and said that her brother was downstairs wanting to talk to her.
Maria rolled her eyes in exasperation as her friend left the room to put her brother’s mind at rest. She knew that Kathy expected nothing different from her family, but she felt that if her brothers were so fucking insistent on knowing her whereabouts it would drive her insane. Her own brothers were normal – i.e. they had no real interest in her. That was how it should be, surely?
Kathy went out into the front garden so they would not be overheard and, looking at her older brother, she said in exasperation, ‘Why do you do this, Len?’
Lenny felt bad but he knew that he had to look out for this girl; she was completely naive where men were concerned. Ray thought she was a fucking brainbox but Lenny knew the truth. She’d only ever been an average student at best. She needed looking after, whether she agreed or not. She was his sister and he would protect her with his life if need be.
‘I’m just looking out for you, Kathy, that’s all.’
He could see the sadness in her eyes and he wished he could tell her something different. But then he would be a liar.
He tried to justify himself as he said, ‘Be fair, Kathy. Mum drinks a lot and she can’t always be trusted to say what is actually going on, can she?’
Kathy didn’t even bother to answer; she just turned away and walked back into the house, closing the front door firmly behind her. She had been there and done that, and it was getting boring as far as she was concerned. Her brothers were a pain in the arse. As she went back up the stairs to where her friend was waiting, she wondered when she would ever be free of them. It was like being in prison.
Jack Johnson was watching his daughter pouring him his nightly Scotch. She looked out for him, even though he had been an absent father at best. He was getting on, but he still had Reggie onside and he would always be his trump card, because what Ray had never allowed for was Reggie’s determination.
He smiled at his daughter. She was a good girl, if not the prettiest woman he had ever seen – unfortunately she looked too much like him. That was a shame, as her mother had been beautiful in her day. Jack regretted how he had treated her mother. In his own way, he had loved her very much, but the Life had taken him over as it had so many men. Hindsight was a wonderful fucking thing.
He waited with bated breath for Reggie to arrive; he knew that he did not have long for this world, but before he went, he would fuck up that cunt Ray Donovan. He was determined to do it. He had swallowed his knob over and over again because he’d had no choice in the matter, but he was on his last legs now and that meant he had fuck-all to lose. How good that felt. He had the knowledge that could ruin that cunt’s whole life and he was now willing to use it, no matter who it hurt. He had sussed Ray out from the first and he had kept his own counsel. Now he was dying, he felt it was his duty to put the cat among the pigeons. That was all he could do really. After all, he had always been a man who left his mark. Why should he change the habit of a lifetime?
Elton Mills looked at the dead girl in front of him and sighed heavily. ‘You must learn to control your temper, Ray. This isn’t good for business.’
Ray smiled that easy smile of his and said seriously, ‘As soon as they threaten to talk to the wife, I lose my temper. Be fair, Elton – I never proposed marriage.’
Elton could see his point, but he also knew that Ray Donovan was getting out of control. This was not good sense; whatever Chrissie was, she was well liked, especially by the men who had fucked her, and they were legion. Elton shook his head, his anger at his friend more than apparent.
‘This is the last time, Ray. You fuck up again,
you
can fucking sort it – and I mean that.’
He felt the animosity coming from Ray Donovan in waves but he didn’t care any more. This had gone too far. Ray was a loose cannon.
‘You OK, Sharon?’
Ray was watching his wife closely. He could see she was pissed but he overlooked it. After the night he’d had, he could hardly say a word.
‘I’m fine, Ray. You all right?’
She was giving nothing away. Sometime in the past sixteen years she had found out that he wasn’t kosher, that he was a fucking liar and a fucking fraud. It had made him sad because he really did love her, but she hadn’t been the person he had expected. She always felt she had to be his moral compass. He wanted a wife, not a fucking judge. It had driven a wedge between them.
‘I have never been better, darling.’
With his eyes on her, she felt the pull of him, of his sexuality. No matter how bad she might feel, she would always want him like that. Even though he took his fliers she knew they meant nothing to him. Ray was a man who would never love lightly – and one thing she knew for sure was that he loved her with a vengeance. That was the most frightening thing as far as she was concerned.
‘Glad to hear it, darling.’
He could hear the sarcasm in her voice and he hated himself for making her feel so bad about herself. But she was no longer the girl he had met or married. She had aged. Women could never age like a man – he looked better as he had got older, whereas she was battered round the edges. She had lost that firmness he had so enjoyed, and when they made love, it wasn’t the same. He wanted a younger woman, but that did not mean he didn’t love her with all his heart – of course he did. He just didn’t want to fuck her any more.
Chrissie came into his mind. She was another one who thought that he would actually leave his Sharon, the mother of his child, to be with someone like her. It was laughable.
He pulled Sharon into his arms and tried to hold her to him but she wriggled away. Laughing, she said, ‘I’m not sure that Chrissie would like this. She is your latest, isn’t she? And from what I’ve heard you are leaving me for her. She is pregnant. Really, Ray, another child, at your fucking age? Congratulations.’