Genetic Attraction (14 page)

The pressure and the pleasure morphed into one huge cloud of feeling, surrounding and filling her until she exploded, energy shooting up her spine, through her womb, and into her head, until she thought she might black out. She 104

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screamed Roan"s name over and over, and he cried out with her and kept crying as he pumped and pumped. Suddenly semen was leaking from her channel. Oh my God, young men came so hard—so good.

Gasping, Roan rolled to the side so as not to crush her. He gave a little laugh.

“I think we needed that.”

“Ummm.”

He turned on his side facing her. “Em, I"m so sorry. I didn"t use a condom.”

“I know.” She turned on her side and gazed into the green eyes. “It was great.”

She got that sweet smile. “Thank you. But you should know I"m clean. I"ve been tested, and Jake and I have been faithful for the better part of a year.”

“I am too. The only man I"ve had sex with besides you two is Henry, and I saw his test results myself. I"m on the pill, which I guess is good, since you"re the second man this week I"ve had unprotected sex with, the first being our soul-searching lover. Did he tell you that?”

“Yeah.” He grinned. “Actually, I think we were both kind of hoping one of us would get you pregnant. You know, like women used to do to trap husbands? Maybe we could trap you.”

“Yeah, we wouldn"t even know which one of you was the father. I kind of like that idea.”

“Me too, assuming you"d let us be the fathers.” He touched her face in that gentle way that was all Roan. “Would you, Em? Would you like us to be the fathers of your child?”

And she started to cry.

He reached for her and gathered her in to his body, gently petting her back through the sweater she was still wearing.

“Oh, Roan,” she whimpered. “Why can"t this all be easy?”

They finally undressed and crawled into bed together. It was still early for two night owls, but she was asleep almost immediately.

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Waking up with Roan the next morning was a treat she celebrated by riding him until they both collapsed in a very satisfying orgasm.

Lying on top of him, she managed to raise her head enough to look in his eyes.

“So you"ve had top and bottom in the last twelve hours. Which do you like best?”

Laughing, he tickled her a little. “Actually I"m a natural bottom, but I do like to fuck. So getting to put my cock in you with you on top is really good for me. Of course, the best is having Jake in my ass and my cock in you—now that is heaven.”

She didn"t answer, because who knew if they"d ever have that again?

Showered, dressed in her same clothes, and after a “model"s” breakfast of fruit and yogurt, Em left the hotel and scampered into the waiting car with Roan. He had the driver take her to Long Island before going on to Connecticut, so they had a long ride to cuddle in the backseat. Roan also had a lot of time to infuse her with his optimism for their combined future.

By the time she was back in her own townhouse, she actually felt a little hopeful that maybe somewhere there was a happy resolution to her love/work tangle. And that tentatively happy mood carried her straight into Monday.

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Chapter Seventeen

Sex was great. Sex with Roan was better than great. Compared to last week, her mood was positively perky, and even the prospect of seeing Jake couldn"t dampen her good mood. Juggling all the documents she"d finished Sunday night at home, plus coffee, a purse, and a plant she"d bought for her office from a roadside vendor on the way in, she could barely nod at Mary on the way past her desk.

“Em…”

“In a second, Mary; just let me get this stuff to my office before I drop it.” She struggled toward her door.

“But Em, wait…”

She was aware that Mary seemed to be behind her as she pushed open her door with her hip. The woman grabbed her shoulder just as Em pushed into the small, cramped space and came face-to-face with Dr. Kovak, who was staring intently at her diplomas and awards displayed on the wall.

Mary sounded breathless. “Em, I just wanted to tell you that Dr. Kovak is here.”

“Thank you, Mary. I can see that. Good morning, Dr. Kovak.”

Kovak gave a huge, patronizing smile as he gestured to the pretty blonde assistant. “Mary, please close the door as you leave.”

Ooh. Em felt a cold chill. She sorted her papers and put her purse in her lower desk drawer. Okay, she was a grown woman here, a professional with no reason to feel intimidated by this asshole. She gave him a smile. “If I"d known we had a meeting this morning, I would have brought coffee for you, Dr. Kovak.”

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“Ah, no problem, Emmaline, I"m a tea drinker myself. I was going to call and make an appointment to discuss your research, but events conspired to prompt the need for a more immediate meeting.”

She sat at her desk and waved Kovak toward the guest chair, noticing for the first time that he was holding a folded newspaper. The cold chill reached arctic proportions.
Oh well, into the fire
. “So what are the conspiring events, Doctor?”

“Excuse me?”

“You said events conspired to make this meeting necessary. What are they?”

“Ah, yes. Have you by chance seen today"s copy of
Whisper
?” He rushed on.

“No, of course you haven"t, or I"m sure you would know the precise reason for my presence here.”

“I don"t read tabloids, Dr. Kovak, and must confess I"m surprised that you obviously do.”

“Yes, well, I feel it"s important for at least one member of the faculty council to be up to date on popular culture, although I never dreamed one of our own would become so very enmeshed in it. And I should mention that I brought this only because it was handy. The coverage on the Internet is far, far more extensive.”

Shit
! Knowing exactly what to expect, she held out her hands and flicked her fingers impatiently. “Let me see it, then.”

With a flourish, he spread the smarmy tabloid on her desk—where in blazing, if off-register, color on the front page was a photo of her locked in a passionate kiss with Roan at the restaurant. Beside it was a more identifiable picture of her very startled face gaping at the camera.
Not very flattering, that one
. And then beside that, to her surprise, she got to see herself holding hands with Roan leaving the hotel on Sunday morning. Shit, so much for escaping the paparazzi.

Though she was hoping passionately that the sleazy reporter hadn"t known who she was, that prayer was quickly dispelled by the tabloid headline, DOING

RESEARCH? It went on to explain that one of America"s leading genetic researchers, whose name was often associated with a possible Nobel Prize, was 108

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apparently busy investigating the genetic makeup of “the most beautiful man in the world,” Roan Black. It reported that the two lovers were seen sharing dinner at a quiet bistro where their passions were obviously running high, and then escaping to one of New York"s most upscale hotels until
the next morning
. Both of their ages were mentioned. Well, double shit. Was that the floor dropping out from under her?

Or just the feeling of her house of cards crumbling?

Looking up at Kovak"s face, she knew the precise meaning of the word “smirk.”

Oh well, might as well try to balls it out
. “I believe what I was doing Saturday night and Sunday morning falls into the category of my private life, Dr. Kovak.”

“That might be true, Emmaline, if you were
doing it
with someone, say, like Dr. Webster—a peer, a man of your own age. But this, this
male model
is notorious, and barely more than a teenager as well. He"s seen draped with the bodies of beautiful models—both female and male, I might add—and he is not someone with whom you or the university should have their names associated. I cannot imagine what he wants with you, but perhaps he"s decided to try and gain a little respect by association. Well, it simply won"t work!”

The self-righteous bastard.

He"d risen from his chair, and she stood to face him. ”Dr. Kovak, any member of our faculty could do well to be as kind, gentle, thoughtful and, I might add, as intelligent as Roan Black. I don"t know what your tabloids say about him, but I know him intimately”—Kovak made a disgusted snort—“and he"s a person of character.” Yes, and a person who didn"t deserve to be treated the way this man and the whole academic world would treat him if this story got bigger.

She took a deep breath and held up her hand to forestall his comment. She would not beg or justify herself to this asshole. “With that said, I have already considered the complexity of my position.” She felt like she was being torn in half.

Her chest hurt, and her lungs wouldn"t hold enough air. If murder had been an option for her, Kovak would have been in serious trouble. She loved her men. But she loved her work, and she couldn"t lose it. She couldn"t. Opening her mouth, the Genetic Attraction

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words tumbled out. “I have already decided I must sever my relationship with Roan Black.”—
and his beautiful, golden-haired, most beloved lover.

That took the wind out of his sails, but it flattened her. Had she said that? She could hardly breathe.

Kovak stared at her and struggled to regain the upper hand. “Well, if that is the case, I can be persuaded to keep this information from the eyes of the committee. As you"ve pointed out, they are not followers of popular culture and so are somewhat unlikely to see it on their own. And even if they do, you are after all, my dear, a very valuable asset to the university, so I"m sure they will be inclined to overlook this bit of scandal. The boy is very beautiful and famous, and I"m sure he simply turned your head. And, of course, it will never happen again.”

“Of course.” Her body hurt, crushed in truth.

“These tabloid things are here today and gone tomorrow, after all. If they don"t have more fuel, the fire will die of its own accord.”

She could barely hear him for the rushing in her ears.

He stepped back from her desk toward the door. “So, my dear, we will put this unfortunate incident behind us. You should mention our discussion to Dr. Martin as well, since he is also a friend of this person, though obviously not such an intimate one.”
Oh shit, Jake.

Kovak looked out the door. “By the way, where is Dr. Martin?”

“Out sick.”
So he wasn’t here today either.

“Ah, pity. So you"ll have to postpone your discussion with him. Well, I"m glad we had this talk, Dr. Silvay. You"ve proved yourself the thoughtful, socially-conscious person I"ve always thought you to be. I shall look forward to seeing only those stories about you that are interesting to the
New England Journal of
Medicine
.” He chuckled at his own humor. “Good day.”

He left, and she collapsed into her chair. What in hell had she just done? Her head fell onto her crossed arms. She just agreed to end her relationship with Roan, 110

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and, of course, that meant with Jake. Never to see Roan again, only to see Jake in short, strained conversations during the day, never to feel either man inside her again. Oh God, she couldn"t cope, but she"d chosen it. When the chips were down, when the shit hit the fan, and every other cliché, she chose the university and her career over the two men she loved—over her two men.
Not hers anymore
. Her chest screamed with pain, and a bitter taste filled her mouth. Jake was right. She didn"t love them enough. Some damned free spirit she was. Her mother would have been ashamed.

And Jake! This meant Jake had been right. He had to hide his relationship with Roan, never to bring his lover to a party or event, never to share the two halves of his life. And what if the paparazzi spied the two of
them
together? Most

“popular culture” fanatics were well aware that Roan was at least bisexual. Would they make the connection with Jake? Did he care anymore?

“Em?”

She looked up at Mary standing in her doorway, pulling at her braid.

“I"m so sorry. I tried to catch you to warn you.”

Em waved her hand. “It doesn"t matter, Mary.”
I’m not sure what does matter.

* * *

Roan"s soft, deep voice sounded dull and lifeless. “I know, baby. If I could bullwhip that photographer I would. Hell, I"d like to bullwhip myself for putting her in that position.”

“It"s not your fault, baby. You"re as much a victim of those slimeballs as Em is.”

“No, I asked for it when I decided to be famous. But she was just in the wrong place at the wrong time…with the wrong guy.” He sighed, and Jake felt his heart rip a little for the man who never wanted to hurt anyone, least of all Em. “I just Genetic Attraction

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didn"t think when Blackball snapped that picture what it could mean. I wanted her so bad, I just took her to the hotel and fucked her and never even thought the bastard might follow us. I never considered what the tabloid coverage would look like.”

“Yeah, I guess this pretty much confirms all her worst fears.”

“I"m afraid it does. And I thought I had her thinking it might work out when she got home last night. But this is a total pooch screw.”

Jake felt a tear fall down his cheek, and he swiped at it angrily. “So I guess we better throw in the towel.”

“Oh, Jake, I want to believe there"s still a solution.”